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AIBU?

to think DS is too young to be left to watch match alone?

7 replies

worriedmumoftwo · 11/11/2010 19:39

DS has just turned 7 and P wants to play in a sports match at the weekend leaving him alone on the sideline. Apparently I am completely overreacting and abnormally risk averse to think that he is too young to be left to spectate on his own. Obviously there will be other spectators from the club there but he has never met them and it will be P's first game of the season so not sure if he has any idea who else will be there.

DS has agreed to this because P has promised him a treat afterwards but I am concerned that he doesn't realise how long the match will be or that he can't interrupt his Dad when he is playing or run onto the pitch. P says it is only an amateur match and of course he would stop playing if necessary and is likely to only play for part of the match however DS doesn't have much of a concept of time yet so I can see him getting bored quite quickly and then upset because he doesn't know how much longer it will last. I don't think you can really expect someone else to be responsible for him without prior arrangement can you?

However I am prepared to reconsider my decision if the consensus is that I am in fact being overprotective!

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inmypants · 11/11/2010 19:43

Don't think you are being over protective at all. Its a nice idea but completely imparctical - what if he got bored and wondered off would your P know where he had gone - is there not someone on the sidelines who is known and trusted who can be asked to keep an eye on him?

NB I have a ds 7 as well and am generally fairly relaxed about this stuff

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jybay · 11/11/2010 19:44

How big will the crowd be? Will the match be in an enclosure so that DS cannot just wander off? Will there be people he actually knows keeping an eye on him or just random spectators?

I'd think it would be OK if there is someone he knows watching with him and if DP will really stop playing if need be. Not OK if DS will just be one of the crowd.

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onceamai · 11/11/2010 19:46

Why can't you go too?

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PandaNot · 11/11/2010 19:48

My ds(6) goes with my dh when he is refereeing or coaching at weekend competitions and understands that dad has things to be doing, he just watches usually. However ds has been going with us to the competitions since he was tiny, is used to the situation and everyone knows him and so watches out for him. My ds absolutely loves going with dh.

But only you know how your son might react and how confident he might be if he needed help, for instance. So YANBentirelyU but maybe underestimating your ds a little bit with regard to how he might manage?

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worriedmumoftwo · 11/11/2010 19:54

No I don't think P knows any of the others in the club very well. Of course, if there was another player who was a friend who had partner or family watching, that would be completely different.

Obviously there will be others from the club around and they will be friendly but you can't just ask someone you don't know well (or at all) to have responsibility for a child. What if they wanted to leave or if he got upset because he wanted to leave? I wouldn't want to take on that responsibility for a child I didn't know and would think badly of a parent who asked me TBH.

P says that I am being ridiculous and that there are always loads of kids running round, but I wouldn't have a problem with him running around if he had someone to go to who wasn't in the match.

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ChippingIn · 11/11/2010 19:58

I think you are being a bit over protective. At 7 he is definitely old enough to understand his Dad is playing, where to go if he needs the toilet & that he's to stay within a certain area and not wander off.

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worriedmumoftwo · 11/11/2010 20:00

No I don't want to go and will be taking DS1 to his sports activity anyhow. I don't have a problem with P playing, he just thinks that because it is near DS2's dance class and shortly afterwards it makes sense to go straight there rather than dropping DS2 back to me.

There will definitely not be anyone DS knows as he has never been to a match or associated social event and none of the club are family friends. P will not tell me how well he knows the players or even if he knows who exactly will be playing, he is refusing to discuss it because he thinks I am being completely unreasonable.

I am not sure if it will be in an enclosure or just on one pitch on a field (it is hockey).

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