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AIBU?

To still be hurt by a friends comments about my childs name

35 replies

minimoomin · 07/10/2010 22:48

When my son was born we gave him an unusual middle name. Most people were very complimentary but one friend put a public comment on facebook saying what was I thinking and had I had my brain removed rather than having a baby. At the time (the day after I had my baby) I was very hurt and removed this comment. I thought of contacting my friend and letting them know how much they had upset me even though I think it was an ill judged joke. The friend also has a child with a rather odd name that I dont personally like and in my opinion very unsuitable for a girl, but would never dream of telling them that. A name is personal choice. In the end I didnt take it further and let it go.

However, another friend has recently had a baby and has given them a very unusual (but fabulous name) and they were congratulated on the name by the friend who criticised my name choice. I now feel it was a personal attack. Should I contact them and clear this up or should I just forget it/ cull the friend

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constantlytired · 07/10/2010 22:51

How long ago did this happen? If you're son is about 5 now, i think i'd let it go, if it was just a few weeks / maybe few months ago, i'd maybe mention it.

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loopyloops · 07/10/2010 22:53

Cull. hat's just nasty, they are no friend of yours.

Congratulations by the way, and I bet it's a lovely name. :)

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2shoes · 07/10/2010 22:55

why do you give a shit, you liked the name.
people are odd
we gave ds a nice first name, i thought my SM would like it as it is in the bible(she was godly) but she hated it!!!!

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minimoomin · 07/10/2010 22:55

It was a just few months ago. The person is an ex (18 years ago though)who I have always got on very well with since we broke up. He has a wife and family of his own.

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minimoomin · 07/10/2010 22:56

2shoes I dont care if he likes the name or not it was the nasty personal comments that were upsetting

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dearprudence · 07/10/2010 22:56

She doesn't sound like much of a friend, tbh.

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cupcakesandbunting · 07/10/2010 23:02

She sounds like a mega bastard.

I would kick her in the fanny.

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Chynah · 07/10/2010 23:06

Why do you care? It's your choice for your child. And who ever uses a middle name anyway.

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cupcakesandbunting · 07/10/2010 23:09

It's not the caring about whether they like the name or not, it's caring about someone being spiteful about you in a public arena. It's just a bit, well, shit.

I maintain that she needs kicking in the fanny

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2shoes · 07/10/2010 23:10

i know, but I would just ignore them(drop them)

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kelly2525 · 07/10/2010 23:39

Fuck em, nobody likes the choice of middle name im planning on giving my unborn baby, they all screw their faces up at it, so theyre told, my baby, my choice, ive now started telling people im also adding a third name, hercules, just to annoy them even more [grin.

On another note, why do so many people bother with facebook? It seems to cause a hell of a lot of stress/fallings out/arguments

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zukiecat · 08/10/2010 07:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chil1234 · 08/10/2010 07:17

My brother gave his son a deliberately daft middle name. He admits it's daft, we've all ribbed him about it (to his face I might add), and he doesn't care... end of story. The problem with laughing about someone on Facebook is that it's the equivalent of taking out a massive billboard with 'minimoomin is an idiot' for the world to see.

If you still want to be their friend I'd suggest you say you found it hurtful and give them the opportunity to apologise

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TryLikingClarity · 08/10/2010 07:26

What's the name?

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DetectivePotato · 08/10/2010 09:23

Your ex is a cock. Why put it on FB like that. You should have commented at the time and pulled him up on it.

If I don't like a name that someone has chosen, I keep it to myself as its each to their own.

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rastababi · 08/10/2010 09:24

She sounds an insensitive cow. I really don't understand how people think it's OK to disprove your own child's name. It's so rude.

DD2 has a totally acceptable but not very common name, and one of my "friends" sent us a card when she was born, written in it was "Congratulations on the birth of X, but seriously, what the fuck is with the name? Hope to see you soon! Love, X"

Bitch Angry

I ditched her there and then Wink

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luciemule · 08/10/2010 09:30

We knew we were having a boy and I told my SIL and BIL before he was born.
SIL burst out laughing and then apologised (too late by then though - she really hurt my feelings). BIL too said "you can't have that".

So we almost changed it but then decided not too. Nobody else has ever commented about purple dinosaurs since and he really suits the name. I couldn't imagine him with the other name we were going to change to.
Cull the ex.

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StewieGriffinsMom · 08/10/2010 09:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MoralDefective · 08/10/2010 09:58

Our DDs middle name is Scarlett....i wanted it for her first name but OLs made disparaging remarks about it being a dog's name....i so wish i'd ignored them and stuck to my guns....this was 22 years ago and i'm still a bit resentful.

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Bue · 08/10/2010 10:28

God, what a jackass. Who would write that on Facebook? I'd probably find that a bit hard to get over, TBH.

I am dying to know what the name is.

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NordicPrincess · 08/10/2010 10:30

ihave an odd name, theres nowt wrong with it

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Pixieonthemoor · 08/10/2010 13:34

Life is too short to have mean people like this in your life. It is one thing to think privately to yourself that a name is not to your taste, quite another to make such disparaging remarks in a public arena. I am sorry you are feeling hurt - this man is a git. Cull immediately!

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Cyclebump · 08/10/2010 14:31

My middle name's Indiana and in my baby book, under 'First impressions of the new baby' my mum's quoted a close family friend as saying 'You called it Indiana!!!'.

We still giggle about it now. Mum didn't care, it was going to be my middle name whether I'd been a boy or a girl and she and dad loved it. Even I don't mind it now :)

Sounds like your 'friend' is a nob.

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wisteria12 · 08/10/2010 14:49

Ugh. I have four kids each with three fairly unusual middle names. Fuck 'em; you're happy, so why does it matter?

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LoveBeingInvitedToTheVIPSale · 08/10/2010 14:51

Delete him from you fb there is really no need to remain friends with such a rude person.

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