Mumsnet Talk

Especially when it comes to being served with mash and onions gravy. Nom nom.

Talking of nom nom and sausages... Do you think Draco/Edward/Bones/Sherlock/Current Fave Slash Obsession would wear these?

And I'd say: Draco, yes; Edward, no; Bones, maybe; Sherlock, why not?.... ;)

Yeah, I cannot see Edward in those. Jasper maybe...

Jasper for sure.

LOL i do like the title. not so much the lacy knick knacks.

Penguin am so happy to be your enabler. All sherlock extras here The spreadsheet (and ensuing discussion in the comments) is awesome.

Have questioned dp about my sherlock-like qualities and it turns out to be 2 moments from the first episode: firstly when he texts john to come home so he can borrow his phone, even though mrs hudson has a phone, because "she was downstairs, and i did shout but she didn't hear me," and secondly, the bit where he is asking John to text the number and saying "have you done it? have you done it now?" <falls about laughing>

which are unfortunately both very like me

so, not the cheekbones or the astounding brain, then. ho hum.

Omi was it the dentist story?

Yes, it was the dentist story. A great little snippet of fan girl life. (dentist story)

I am busy writing now but I have read half the Sherlock fic, but stopped as it was a wip at the time and forgot to go back. I reckon that I will finish it / re-read it while avoiding getting stuff done. I love Sherlock in general (I read all the stories when I was 15 and then again last year) and I haven't quite decided if I like it as a slash pairing or not yet.

Ha!

Did you lot ever organise a meet up?

Hello!
No meet up never happened

I had a lovely day in the sunshine! But my boy Cav hit the deck <broken hearted sobbing>

I am trying to convince DH to come to Guildford for the finish next weekend...

i was so fond of the conan doyle stories when i was a child, i have no idea why i find them so appealing

i really like the modernising they've done, e.g. when he says it is a three (nicotine) patch problem

oh god this is why i can't watch anything on the tv, i get obsessed immediately

And I have, of course, read the Sherlock fic. UNF is about right. She's got their relationship just right.

Evil! Convince HARD!

What happened to the doodle poll? Can we arrange an Oct/Nov Weekend?

Tell me how I can get that Sherlock fic on my kindle, purleeeeease!
I use code monkey for FFnet but haven't used anything else.

Wait a sec, I bet it's on AO3.

Yes - here it is. And you should be able to download it straight to your kindle from AO3, too.

<Gets excited about reccing something people actually want to read>

<Feels disloyal it isn't Drarry>

<gives birds a stern look>

<eyes up Merlin rec list and wonders if anyone would be interested>

Ok, if I post again tonight, slap my wrist and tell me to go away and write another thousand words. I have a deadline to meet and need to write that much every night for the next two weeks to meet it.

Go, Omi!

I hope you are all voting for the good ship Drarry in the Ultimate Slash Madness Tourney

(psst Sherlock is in there too. And Merlin. Just in case you know anyone who likes them )

I'm not here, but I just wanted to say that I've already voted for Drarry four times today. And I was out most of the day.

Can we slap you on the arse instead? the wrist is no fun.

Impressive voting, though

I want to read fic tonight but am going to settle for a proper book as I want to get it finished and passed onto it's new home that is waiting for its arrival.

Good luck with the writing Omi.
Hope you manage to convince dh Evil.
Hope things aren't as bad as you fear Team

<waves at the rest of the sluts>

Did everyone fill in the doodle poll? Check the sekrit page for the link & I'll post the most popular day on Tuesday. If anyone can't get on/isn't on sekrit page, let me know & I'll email link tomorrow.

Dh working again tonight so I'm drinking & feeling sorry for myslef.

Would be up for Fridays in Cambridge, but would have to bring ds2 with me!

Oh my god I read that Sherlock fic and I enjoyed it!

Good good.

I did the doodle thing, but everything is always a bit dependent on the baby that doesn't take a bottle (or sleep!)

I haven't done the doodle thing but my schedule is insane now and free time will be a figment of my imagination. However, I do hope that you can get everything sorted out and have another wonderful time.

Omi I think the link was wonky.

Morning all.

Correct link for Noeon's HPSM fic Possibly Maybe.

Drarry fluff: Draco as a genie

I am now fixated by Birds' Sherlock fic. Just brilliant writing, characters, everything. And hot as fuck

Have now read all the extra scenes and WANT MOAH

I am mired under with planning. Tis shit.
Cunfused about QCA scrappage - everything on Stndards Site has been archived, but new DfE is crapper than crap with no content. So am I still ok to use QCA as guidance, or make shit up? and I can't ask this at school as they already think I'm a dunce

Chatty Man with Alan Carr is booking now, and I'm wondering if booking near the release date to BD2 might mean seeing a few Twilight star up close?

Can you see me procrastinating?

I can't believe they just scrapped all the QCA stuff, with no real guidance in its place. I don't think there's anything wrong with still using QCA ideas, but I guess you can always see it as a chance to put more of your own ideas in? But then again I trained pre-QCA, and spent hours scouring Child Ed and Scholastic books for ideas. As long as the NC is covered, in theory you can teach any topic you want, right? Are there any other teachers at the school you can ask?

Does the school work by subject area or in a more topic-based cross-curricular way? Are you planning for a year group or a subject (eg in co-ordinator role?).

Ironically enough, for someone who hates paperwork, I love planning.

I was trying to look up some QCA stuff to help a friend out last year, was so pissed off to see it gone with a stupied 'we are reviewing it' statement in its place.

You can still find it in the Archives. Here.

We were very cross-curricular, Learning Journey, and a bit airy fairy. Now, post-O*****, I've been given no guidance on LTP. I'm planning for some discrete subjects.

Is there any other long-term planning in school? Set termly topics etc?

It is possible to be cross-curricular and teach subjects well too: it's all in the planning. (no pressure!)

I am covering PPA time so only get a morning or afternoon with each class - I have been tasked with "mopping up", basically teaching what no one else want to. And it needs to be self-contained as I am solely responsible for these lessons - no planning left for me, all my own marking & assessment to be done etc etc.
I'm just going with a QCA unit that ties in with the book they are doing in Literacy. Still Life FTW!

Ommmmmmmmi, if I emailed you whaat I've cut and pasted done so far, could you just look it over? It's only one sheet.

Ooh planning, yippee! <jumps and down and claps hands>

That was 100% non-sarcastic. I really do love it. When I trained, the NC was a bit of a novelty too. We did it all old school, from scratch.

We didn't have cars back then: just they'd up a couple of dinosaurs, Fre Flintstone-style.

They'd = hitch. Sigh.

I've got to go out in a sec to take DS to an appointment, but if you send it now I'll have a quick look.

Popping out now, happy to check stuff tonight.

Sorry - got distracted by a Daily Fail thread. Will send it soon!

An you might have to PM me your email address too!

Have just watched the Olympic parade, was ace. Did the Mobot, Tom Daley smiled at me cougar emoticon, Ben Ainslie is delicious. And they're all so very very young!

Omi I liked the HP/SM fic. I was surprised when SM topped Harry, that scenario usually follows a well trodden path doesn't it (or maybe I just don't read many SM fics).

Ds1 has a friend round; dses2 and 3 are in love with him so it's been a very pleasant and easy day while they all just sit round admiring him

dp just texted to ask if alan rickman is gay
he said they are having a heated debate about it at work; as he works in a really staid office I am finding this funny

He had told everyone A Rickman is gay and was being argued with

I have told him not to believe everything he reads in fanfiction

According to Wikipedia, he's been with his 'partner' since 1965...

Partner is female, alas

I texted him back "wtf are you discussing alan rickman's sex life for at work?"

he texted "don't worry, I have not mentioned you, Harry Potter, or bumming."

I said (sarcastically) "oh well done"

he said "yes it was quite tricky"

I watched the Red Arrows fly overhead from Parliament Hill - I had a great view.

Most popular dates for meet-up are 20 Oct & 3 Nov, I think everyone has done it now.

Birds, your DH is hilarious. All mine does at work is gossip about people I don't know. And we're not allowed talk about that kind of stuff in the staff room.

I still have no fic-reading time. New meds make me sleepy so I can't stay awake long enough to read. I have a day off next week and I'm going to drop the DCs to school and do nothing, all day.

Love this disection of BPop and the trainwreck that was Robsten...

"Don't fucking touch me, dude!" is what the paps say fell out of Kristen Stewart's mouth this morning when a bodyguard tried to help her walk through the crowd at Pearson International Airport in Toronto. It warms the core of my cunt gene knowing that supposedly spending weeks Emo-ing into her bong over shitting on RPattz's sparkly heart hasn't changed her miserable bitch ways.

KStew wore RPattz's dirty hat on her head AGAIN and this means that either: a) The prop master of the staged production known as her fake relationship with RPattz hasn't collected it yet or; b) KStew wants the dried unicorn sweat from RPattz's enchanted forest hair on top of her head as much as possible; or c) That actually isn't RPattz's hat. KStew stole that hat from a hobo she bitched out after he looked at her funny. Shifty hobos and RPattz do have the exact same fashion sense.

While promoting On The Road at TIFF yesterday, The Associated Press asked KStew if it's going to be awkward promoting the last Twatlight movie in November with RPattz and she only said, "We're going to be fine. We're totally fine."

Some of the crazed Twihards on Twitter think that means ROBSTEN IS UNBROKEN and real, authentic true love isn't dead, so they don't have to spend the rest of their nights bawling into the pile of dead cats they didn't take care of, because they're too torn apart to leave the house to buy cat food. But to me this just means that Robsten's contract has expired and at the premiere of Twatlight in November, they're both going to behave themselves and won't scrap over that hat while Bear Pattinson cheers RPattz on.
Link here

Team, I forgot to add the 'com' at the end of my email address.

Shifty hobo and rpattz share exact same fashion sense

I would laugh so much if it wasn't his manky hat

Mumsnet is broken It keeps eating my posts.

Team, I'm going to have another quick read of your planning tomorrow, as I've had wine and need to go to bed (I got up at 5am this morning thanks to DD). It all looked fine though, but I'll have a think about the different sections on the last one.

Manky hat! UUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH! It's a very funny article, well found, Team!

At least it wasn't the beanie, though. That would be even more grim.

Though TeWi is right, it would be way more funny if it was some other hat, completely RPattz-grime-free.

Penguin, the extra Sherlock scenes just stop, and she did promise moah didn't she

I have also been thinking (ok, obsessing) over why that fic works so well and this is what I have come up with. The transition of an asexual seeming character to a very sexual one. The transition of a seemingly straight character to a bisexual one. The transition of a friendship to a sexual relationship. The weirdly dub-con sort of accidental BDSM relationship. All the sex club stuff, threesomes, voyeurism, sexual sharing, etc, but done with fantastic emotional depth. It's a lot more than porn because of the way she writes everyone's emotions. The very personal POV - we are right inside John's head the whole time in a way not many authors manage. I think any one of these elements would be fic gold, but the combination of all of them - well!

It was too porny for me, especially early on. I prefer sex with a connection, I think. And fantasies not based on porn - I really find porn a turn-off.

I fully realise that I am probably in the minority on this one.

But there's loads of connection, Omi - it's just that the connection is between John and Sherlock. Like that scene in Left My Heart where Draco directs the blow job etched into memory. Plus, hard fnar to find a bloke whose fantasy wankbank didn't start with porn, I suspect.

I agree Birds, it's the shift that's so great. I actually liked it least when they did get together at the end - but the build up was amazing.

Evil, are you not a Dlisted aficianado ? It's practically the first place I look, the writer is hysterical.

I know it's about the connection between John and Sherlock, but I am uncomfortable with the whole framing of it, about the other people and the focus on specific acts/scenarios. I felt exactly the same about Left My Heart too. I think that I am not a voyeur.

My views on porn are probably nothing like anyone else's on this thread, but suffice to say that it really isn't my cup of tea (irony of ironies, I know).

I don't identify as a porn fan. I got so much emotional connection from this fic, I found a lot of it quite touching. Not just John and Sherlock, but the OCs as well. It was all highly idealistic and impossible I suppose, that people would do all that porny kind of stuff in this very caring and respectful way, but it really worked for me at the time. It seemed sort of like ethical porn, LOL. Am wondering now if I have been kind of duped?

I do like voyeurism in fic, I fully admit (no shame?)

No, that all makes sense, birds. I guess it's just one of those horses for courses thing. And I'm a donkey. Or something like that.

Maybe I need a little fic break or something. Or a break from my kids. One of the two - I'm feeling a little flustered at the moment.

Has made me think, though.

I think maybe i DO like porn. I just think it's 'wrong' for various reasons (not too dissimilar to yours I don't think). But when it's dressed up as something else that gets it past my 'I don't like porn' radar, I bloody like it a lot.

Well I like it all written down, just some things more than others. And I do need some child-free time - I'm writing this while sitting on mybbed, chatting to DD while DS jumps up and down and destroys things.

I wish DH didnt have a drawer full of bike bits in the wardrobe - he gets so angry when DS goes in it, but why store things at DS height? It is a treasure trove of dangerous pointy things and delicate fiddly things. Sigh.

that seems to be a bit of a dh blind spot if a sample of 2 is anything to go by, then

(that kind of sounds like i have 2 husbands, but i meant mine and yours)

my dp keeps condoms and, ahem, things like that, in the wardrobe, just where children would want to rummage

Birds, I have visions of one of your dc appearing and going 'mum look at this funny balloon I found in your cupboard'

shouldnt be here must move

Bitchy, you laugh but ds1 did do that once - "ooh, balloons" after rooting around a bedroom drawer

I am obviously the only one who told the DCs that condoms are so DH and I don't have any more babies. They never touch anything in our bedroom any more.

Tonight I will be mostly altering school uniforms and MNing in front of the fire. I have brought no work home today.

Stop the press everyone: I just did some cleaning. It had to happen one day, and it seemed to be the perfect antidote to my odd mood today. Also I found the source of the fruit flies in the kitchen: one of DS's hidden pear cores.

Also, my children did not try to kill each other not once in the past hour, it's amazing what I can get done when I don't need to spend all my time standing between them. Right, feed them, wash them, stick them in bed, write. That is my plan for the evening.

The DC have never asked about condoms, but when they ask I will give them your answer, Never. It's perfect.

LOL Never. Mine know what they are, but I hadn't thought of the fear angle. However, ds2 has been complaining that "we haven't had any babies since ds3 was born" (5 months ago), so I would not put it past him to try sabotage

Ds1 and I are planning to watch philosophers stone tomorrow - he is really quite sensitive about peril, violence, anger, etc. Which bits do I need to prepare him for / fast forward past? I thought of Voldemort on Quirrell's head, wizard's chess, what else might be problematic do you think?

I'd say Devil's Snare and Fluffy the three-headed dog could both be fairly worrisome, Birds. Has he read the book so will know what to expect, or not?

oh yes thanks evil
he has read the book, but it's so different when it's a film, isn't it?
I am not sure if we'll see all of the scary parts, or skip past all of them

for comparison, the lion king was too scary for him, but we'll see
at least he knows it ends well!

I'm not sure you can anticipate what will frighten him, Birds. DS loved Monster House (animated house comes to life on Hallowe'en and eats people, scary stuff) but insisted I fast forward the bit in Polar Express where the broken toys were. As long as you're there to reassure him and remind him that they made 7 more HP films not to mention all the gay wizard pornso it must turn out ok, he'll probably be ok?

Simba watching his father die is disturbing to audiences of all ages and Scar and the hyenas are well scary, so your DS is not unreasonable there!

Only you can decide, birds.

took the kids to see Brave. DD (3) loved it and keeps asking if we can go again. When I asked her if she was scared, she told me that it was only a film, and it wasn't real. DS, on the other hand (7) cried his eyes out, was terrified.

Tilly it is exactly the sort of stuff ds would do and usually in front of the only person that you really really really didn't want to witness that. I like the truth factore, just have had need to explain this specific and would like to leave it until essential as ds is only young yet.

DD was afraid of the aristocats yesterday (not crats, autocorrect, that would be v inappropriate) she loves things like kung fu panda so I was :s

In other news I have knitted a scarf! I'm massively not procrastination about packing the house, oh no...

Most scared I have ever seen DD was when she watched Monsters Inc. It wasn't the monsters, it was the little girl lost that did it for her. We'd borrowed it when she was ill, because it was her best friend's favourite film.

Of course now she'll watch anything, it seems, without batting an eyelid. (Although there's still stuff I won't let her watch).

A gloriously creepy Kirk/McCoy AU here.

Ds1 has watched HP1 & 2, he thinks the ending with Voldemort is the scariest bit but he was more upset by Harry's parents dying. I was annoyed when his teacher put on HP3 in the last week of school, he had nightmares about the Dementors for about a week afterwards.

Did you tell someone at the school about it, Tilly? They really shouldn't be showing PG films without your knowledge/permission. The teacher probably doesn't have kids and didn't realise. not talking from personal experience there at all, oh no They won't know unless someone tells them...

I am grateful to e parent who quietly pointed it out to me

the parent.

Gor blimey, the Dementors give me nightmares! I'd be livid if someone showed ds1 that without permission. Sorry for ds, Tilly.

I'd just decided that he needed to wait until he was a little older to see it as well! I did mention it to the teacher and she was very apologetic. She's a nqt (and excellent in all other respects) so don't think she'd realised that just because some of his classmates had seen it that all of them could. But she said she'd check with parents in future.

We had some babysitting issues with ds2 but me and ds1 got as far as the quidditch match. Got through Dursleys being horrible, Lily dying (probably worst bit), Hagrid crashing in the door, Fluffy, the troll. All was fine. I think knowing the story helped. He loved it and he now has an awesome Snape face he can do, LOL.

My two will watch almost anything - seen all but the last two HP films, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Goonies, Indiana Jones, Hulk, Avengers, Thor, Green Lantern, Dr Who, Lord of the Rings etc etc
But it was Happy Feet, yes, HAPPY FEET that we had to turn off after a few minutes.
And why would tap dancing penguins set my children off in fits of uncontrollable sobbing? Because he Mummy went away...

<tumbleweed>

Please could someone tell me why I can't seem to be able to get the Left My Heart Stories to download from Emma Grants site
www.queerasjedi.net/emma/ebooks/
could anyone tell me an easy way of doing it. I usually have no problems with putting stuff on be it ebooks or pdf's but my computer does not seem to like the links on her site

Maybe you'd have better luck AO3, nosey? Left My Heart by Emma Grant on AO3

<tumbleweed>

Weird how some parts of my week are so nice, and some are just totally shitty.
I'll let you guess which bits are which...

DH is already talking as though I will have resigned and be out of there by Christmas, so that's a positive believe it or not! . And I've had my referral through for counselling, no appointment yet.

This cheered me up no end today. SFW

Resigning sounds good. Ifykwim.

Team, I should be writing a very large and boring document. And yet I am lurking in youtube and currently listening to a very tallented piano player. I say do what makes you happy. If that is leaving leave. Is changing schools an option?

Yay, resign! Join me in the land of the liberated

Land of liberated sucks have been trying to escape it for more then 2 years. <trapped>

I'm not actually a believer in do whatever makes you happy (a bit too Aleister Crowley for me!). I think sometimes you just have to suck it up. I prefer do what you need to do I think. If you as a family don't need your income & you can take some time out, retrain, find an alternative job, whatever, that's great. Hope the next few weeks go ok.

Evil, how is life as a lady of leisure? Thought you'd be posting far more!

The Chick has taken to waking for the day at 4.30. I am a zombie.

I hadn't even gone to bed then Penguin <passes some very strong coffee>

Ah yes, the 4.30 wakings. Nothing quite like it, is there? I hope he grows out of it soon! Poor you though, Penguin.

And I thought that you were sleeping better, Bitchy!

I have a start date for DS! Two more weeks, and he starts. Which is fine.

Yay Omi, what are you going to do with all that time?!

Penguin, sympathies with the early waking, hope it will soon pass

There has been a lot of rl going on which means my brain is over busy atm which means sleeping is harder to do. Am hoping it will settle down again after the weekend. planning on making sure it does.

i had a bad night with ds3, then came on here to whinge and realised i have nothing to complain about when compared to a 4.30 am start, or a post 4.30 am end....

Ds1 announced that Draco is his "second favourite character" and that he wants to dress up as him at Halloween. I am so proud

Birds , ds1 wants to be Dumbledore "because everyone wants to be Harry & that's just boring"

Tilly, that's so cool I must give kudos to Tom Felton because ds1 (much to my chagrin) HATED Draco until he saw him in the film. Now he is practising his smirk.

Our kids are so cool

<waves>

Evil - that bloody enormous Bike race everyone is excited about comes past my front door on Sunday. Every road in and out of the village is closed though unfortunately....

Ohhhhh, Dream, exciting! I am still working on persuading DH to come down and cheer them on. I suspect it might be an epic train journey too far though, with work the next day. On the other hand, being there for the finish would be brilliant... I wonder how far from the train station the finish will be

Well it finishes n the high street....5-10 mins MAX from train Station. It goes through twice as well, at 1ish and then again for the finish...

There were a lot of people cycling the route this week, today they were blooming everywhere! Get off my drive!

Right, extra ammo for DH-persuasion. Thanks!

The Judge trying my case looks like Alan Rickman. It is very distracting. Just thought you all needed to know

Whatever you do, Penguin, don't think of that snake slash fic while you're looking at him. HTH.

Evil you are slightly evil you know. but that just made me rofl

Evil you read my mind without me having to say any more!

(And you will appreciate that I've just got my BFF of 30+ years a first edition of the Compleet Molesworth as a 40th pressie )

cheers cheers cheers!

Aw fuckit - just lost a long post and cannot be arsed to retype.
Synopsis
Yay to Omi for school place!
Yay to Rickman-a-like judges! (but does he sound like him?!)
Work sucks and is highly over-rated IMHO.
<Passes Bitchy some zopiclone> (but don't use them all, I need them suckers back!)
<gropes Dream's bewbies>

Everyone can have some because it's Friday. Nondono.

Hello eveyone! <waves to all>

I want to write (I am mid-fic) but am stuck looking after DS full time at the mo, it is most exhausting/frustrating etc. DS is lovely though: he is currently naked, wrapped up in a sheet and sitting in a recently-emptied toy basket. He looks adorable, but my clean washing and all the toys are now strewn across the floor. Oh well. And now I will get him dressed for the fourth time today....

Penguin, I demand a picture or link to his picture!

Omi, clean laundry is over rated. And memories of DCs looking adorable will stick with you, but not the mess you had to clean up. Which is of exactly no consolation right now, I understand

My good news today is the new charger for my tablet arrived today, and DH opened the envelope and plugged in my tab so it would be juiced up when I got home from work (in between visiting the vet, doing 3 school runs and cooking the dinner. And he's coming to see Lady Gaga tomorrow night with me even though he doesn't care for her music.) <3 <3 <3

OMG, look at Alan Rickman playing Ronnie Reagan in The Butler!

I actually miss that stage Omi.

Thanks team but you keep them. I have something much better for the spirits planned for tonight. Tis all good fun.

I know, I know. DS is utterly charming, but it's been two months since I've had that lovely regular respite that school offers. And I'm just tired today, and I want a bit of 'me' time.

I'm so tired I just cancelled my parents babysitting tonight because all I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep. I've been on the edge of tears all day - just because of lack of sleep.

Sorry for the whinging. I will be all rainbows by tomorrow, I promise.

Whinge all you like, dearie. You are allowed to be weary and miserable on here. It's an extension of the no shame rule. I am merely bubbly and enthusiastic because of the happy pills. Lots of people in RL have commented on my newly cheery disposition (not that a single one of them asked me if I was ok when I was puffy-eyed from crying and barely capable of holding a conversation).

I hope you get a good sleep tonight. I would've kept the babysitting and used it to get some extra shut-eye.

Babysitting does not equate with extra sleep here! Last time we came home early, and my parents stayed for another hour and a half, chatting away. Staying in means I am tucked up in bed, DH is dealing with the kids as he should as he's been home past their bedtime the past three nights and we are getting a takeaway later. I am not getting out of bed until the DC are asleep.

I am going to do some writing of fluff now.

Also, yay! for being happy and happy pills.

Oh, I've missed sitting in bed listening to DH chat to DD. He is currently getting the names of who she plays kiss chase with...

Hello everyone

aw omi what a shame. will you go out another time?

Never I'm glad you are feeling bubbly!

I keep getting caught out by parental controls on my phone. I can only read smut in the house using our wifi. I don't know how to turn them off?

<delurks> Praise be for whingeing being allowed as an extension of the 'no shame' rule. You guys rock.

May I please have a link for 'that snake slash fic' that has something to do with Alan Rickman? <hopeful>? RL sucks a yard of Satan's cock right now, and I need fics please. The Sherlock 'cure for boredom' was wonderful.

We will go out next week instead. My parents are desparate to help at the moment. Going on another holiday in a couple of weeks time though

Sorry, I can't remember the name of the snake fic, Nature.

Ignore the spelling mistake. I am so verrrry tired. <hangs head in pedant-shame>

Parseltongue-tied for Nature. Actually, all her Snarry fics are worth reading, if you like that sort of thing. Which I do

I think you might have to get your network provider to turn off the parental controls, Birds. Quick phonecall should sort it though.

Ooh, I could do with a bit of Snape at the moment.

Nope, Snarry still not doing it for me. <doggedly loyal to Drarry>

I can't link from phone but Emma Grant (the cure for boredom writer) has a fab story called The Making Of set after Sherlock's faked death. I have just discovered that it's a WIP at a crucial point (grr) but it's really good. John/Lestrade/Sherlock.

Wow, so strange to see Emma Grant referenced but not for Left My Heart. But great that she's still writing, and so popular.

This week, I have mostly been writing Kirk/McCoy comment!fic. Any of you belonging to the Jim-and-Bones LJ comm will be able to read them - at some point I'll make a list and link them all from my LJ. The community is running a little "write more comment!fic" contest of sorts, so I'm writing something every day for their Daily Captain and Daily Doctor pictures. Sometimes it's really difficult, and other times it seems like the easiest thing in the world. So far, the heavily descriptive misery-and-death fics have flowed best. I'm not sure what that says about me

Oh wow, Evil! I may actually join the comm now... I was wondering what you were up to.

And would you be free for some betaing end of September/beginning of October? 30k ish? Fluff though.... (pretty please, obviously )

New thread, 150 posts in, and I didn't even know it was here. <living under a rock>
Hardly had anytime to read fic or anything this week, but a rec from here stopped last Saturday being a total fail. (Crap Dr Who episode aside.) So whoever recced the Ned/Stella fic, back at the end of last thread, thank you very much.

Don't get your hopes up, Omi, it's all very short - around 500 words for each bit or so. Nice to remember how to write though, and trying to think of what to write for each set of pictures.

And of course I'll beta for you! 30k is practically a drabble for you these days anyway

I like drabbles - so much said in a few words, brilliant.

And thank you.We'll see how long this fic is in the end - it's 10k at the moment. I am in full writing mode though. Well, except for not being able to sit and write due to time/children.

Comment fic length is better than drabble length: 500 words sounds perfect.

Omi, hope you got a decent sleep, will you manage a break this weekend?

Evil, hadn't realised you'd been writing, will log on after work & have a read.

And speaking of work, I'd better go & get ready! I also have a BD1 night to look forward to.

I had a good sleep. DH put the kids to bed, chatted to DD, found her tooth which had come out in the morning and been dropped on the floor etc. I woke up this morning to DD saying that the tooth fairy hadn't come. I kicked the 'tooth fairy'.

Quiet today, where is everyone?

I'm planning (yippee).
Anyone able to help me with some grammar?
I need to identify the nouns, verbs, adjectives and adverbs in this

"Then one afternoon, walking back home with the icy wind in his face, his eye was caught suddenly by something silvery lying in the gutter, in the snow. Charlie stepped off the kerb and bent down to examine it. Part of it was buried under the snow, but he saw at once what it was. It was a fifty-pence piece! Quickly he looked around him. Had somebody just dropped it?"

Nouns
Something
Charlie
Somebody
wind

adjectives
Silvery
icy

verbs
Walking
Stepped off
Bent
lying

Adverbs
Quickly
Back?

Have I made any howling errors missed any?

nouns: afternoon?, home, face, eye, gutter, snow, kerb , fifty-pence piece,

verbs: caught, buried, saw, looked, dropped

adverbs: suddenly.

i was wondering about 'down', but think that and 'back' are both prepositions?

I hope this helps although i am by no means sure about them all!

verb: examine

Fell off the thread, moving house this week so might be awol for a bit.

I stared blankly at those words and came up with nothing team. Good job I'm not a teacher...

Afternoon, home, wind, face, eye, gutter, snow, kerb, a fifty-pence piece are all nouns. Charlie is a proper noun.
Quickly and suddenly are adverbs
Icy, silvery are adjectives
Walking, was caught, lying, stepped, bent down, buried, examine, looked, saw and dropped are all verbs (or participles).

Thank you ladies! The only grammar I was ever taught explicitly was when I did GCSE Latin. And now I have to teach it for Year 6 SATs!
This particular lesson is being observed by the Head and a local Super Head she wears her pants on the outside so I have to do it correctly!

In spite of being a qualified English teacher, I was never taught parts of speech either

I'm just back from Lady Gaga, who was fucking amaxing! Sadly, it is the end of a summer of great concerts and I will literally only leave the house to go to work/Tesco for at least a month.

I only learned noun, verb, adjective and adverb at school. My dad bought me a book on grammar though, and I learned a fair bit of French, which helped. It's all different now: DD came home from school one day and told me that 'sat is the past tense of sit' or some such. This was in Year 1.

I am currently rolling around in the rose-tinted loveliness of fluff. It's much less depressing than angst to write.

In other news, when DS woke up this morning, DD was in the loo. So a minute later he woke me up and presented me with is Buzz Lightyear cup, filled with warm wee. [there is no emoticon for how that felt].

You are all talking a foreign language to me. I still have no idea what a verb is. Never learnt the terminology it wasn't considered the education in thing. I learnt about names, doing words, describing words etc. I also don't help ds with his literacy homework. He goes to a family member that can draw gramatical diagrams of the gramatical construction of a sentance <scary to encounter>

It is very clear from that i am not awake. sorr about the lack of coherancy. <scuttles off to find coffee>

I have only a very vague grasp of what verbs, nouns, infinitives and the like are. I remember my GCSE French teacher being very frustrated trying to teach us the pluperfect tense, and no-one had any idea what she meant in English, never mind French. I can use the English language pretty well, but explaining it is damn near impossible.

In other news, this is a beautiful Kirk/McCoy fic - the English language is treated well.

TeWi, I meant to say earlier, very exciting about the house move. Have you found somewhere bigger? Are you buying? Did your mum come through in the end? Did you ever manage to match the paint colours on the wall?

Ah yes, you just reminded me! The walls are silk not matt, which explains that. Mum did come round and we have a bigger house but she is already whining about every penny not spent paying them back so I'm regretting it already...

I wonder, do the people who do that even realise, TeWi? It sucks a lot of the pleasure and excitement out of getting a new place. Could you organise a regular repayment schedule and tell her that as long as you're keeping up with that, your other expenses are none of her business? And congrats on your new home

Hoorah that she changed her mind, boo for her being difficult. But I guess it would be more suprising if she wasn't difficult...

Oh yes, we have a signed and agreed schedule - she agreed it, but still...<headdesk>

Get keys tomorrow. I'm really nervous about it all going wrong or the new house not being that great. We only saw it twice! How have I spent so much money on something i've seen twice?!

It will be great! You will make it your home, dd will christen it by drawing on the wall, ds will pee on the floor. It will be all cosy in no time at all.*

*I may be projecting my own children's behaviour here.

Omi.
Sorry that the move is going to be a bit bitter sweet. Hope she backs off and lets you enjoy it, Tewi.

Cheers.

I'm sure it'll be grand. (and lightly drawn on, maybe we should buy some if that chalkboard paint?)

WD40 takes crayon off walls, then washing up liquid takes the WD40 off. (DD fancied herself as a bit of a Banksy at one time and they both peed and pooped and puked on all sorts of surfaces.) Forsan et haec olim meminisse juvabit and all that.

Just keep reminding yourself that you're a homeowner (and try to be civil to your mother )

<takes notes>

Omi, we have pleather furniture (wipe-clean), no carpets anywhere in the house and the most expensive curtains were €35. DS killed a €600 piece of equipment once so we learned that lesson well. If it can't be hosed down or put in the washing machine, it has no place here. The DCs favourite outdoor activity is to use muddy puddle-water and the sweeping brush to "paint" the decking .

Aren't kids great???

Ah yes, brushes and water outside are popular here too. if you ignore the fact that DS pees in everything at the moment

Everything in out home has a value of £0 because ds has already destroyed it. It's funny how you learn to cope with these things...

We have a rule here. You break it when it isn't an accident you pay for it. Out of birthday and christmas money if necessary. Enforced once on something small. It is a good warning when temper tantrums rage here. He is rather fond of pocket money for computer/lego/some plastic tatt or other etc. <evil mother>

Mostly here the decorating is done in lego, the smallest and more deadly for feet bits all over the fecking floor.

Oh God yes. Lego!

Btw Omi - the peeing in everything thing. It's a boy thing. Ds was dreadful but his favourite was to go pee in the garden. he open the front door to pee in the front garden once. He only had to open the other door in the hall to get to the toilet.

Oh yes, I remember my brother doing the peeing thing too. DS is obviously just so pleased to have a penis.

The cup this morning was pretty much at my pee-tolerance limit though.

I have a friend from Oz, her dad told her kids that in Oz it's okay to pee wherever you like outside and her DSs first response was to go out the front and pee in the middle of the driveway.

I have a friend whose mum once told her little brother to just pee in the pool. So he got out, pulled down his swimming trunks, and weed into the swimming pool.

! That's hilarious!

Poor mum.

what tewi said

Lol, pee everywhere.

TeWi, hope the acquiring of keys goes well!

I just read another Kirk/McCoy fic. This one is sad and beautiful and made me cry. I loved it.

So for those of you who liked Cure for Boredom, how about some totally NSFW fan art? I follow Emma Grant on twitter, and she posts loads of (other people's) fan art on tumblr.

So, comment fic contest for Jim and Bones is all over. I came joint third, and if you want to read the stories, there's a master list here. Some of them are really good - I particularly liked 19-10-22

I have a rec: it's a long Draco / Albus Severus and I haven't even finished it yet, but it's totally riveting. The Consequences of Truth

Omi I certainly did like waking up to that on LJ this morning <cold shower>

nice work evil! Really don't know if I can read Jim / Bones but I love what you write, so may try.

TeWi, sorry to hear your mum's being awkward already, but hope you can enjoy the new house anyway.

My stuff is all pretty safe, birds. There are a couple of creepy ones though - think it must be the effect of reading Stephen King this week!

Which SK, evil? I'm reading The Dead Zone atm

Tewi, yay for house move, hope your mum eases up a bit

And we also have the Lego problem, but seem to have fortunately passed by the peeing/drawing everywhere stage

Desperation. I started it last week when the car was in the garage so I hid out in the library all morning! Then got stuck in and ended up getting it on kindle so I could read the rest. Like most Stephen King, it's brilliantly terrifying until it all goes supernatural. I much prefer horror to STAY horror (ie, human), but supernatural nonsense does at least mean I can still sleep...

Adding to the faint smell of urine on the thread, I was changing the Chick this morning so he was sans nappy. He launched himself at my boobs with a cry of triumph because normally I only feed him in bed. Then he just gave a sigh, and peed everywhere. I had just got out of the shower too. It was the sigh that did it, just complete happiness

I am on train to Birmingham again. Thursday, Fri & again today. No Alan Rickman lookalike this time though, sigh.

Oh, and I nominate "he's just so pleased to have a penis" for next thread title

YY for Penguin's thread title! Although, it's not just boys. I saw a little girl of about four climb out of the pool recently, pull her swimsuit to one side and pee on the floor beside the jacuzzi. I was that her parents didn't take her to the adjacent toilet or even get her to pee into one of the drains. They just left a puddle for one of the old ladies who hog the jacuzzi anyone to slip on!

Am off work today because of building work. Have just come back from a lovely jalk in the drizzle and am considering ringing DH to meet me for lunch.

I totes read that as "a lovely walk in the jizzle"

No shame, Team! (I read it exactly the same way)

Hello lovelies... Going to attempt once more to get back to writing an all that jizz...

So this is the best place to start, yes?

Absolutely. Give us some more of your slashy goodness.

And hello, too, obviously.

Hey Omi
It will be some considerable time before I produce anything readable but its better than not writing anything at all!

I cant read anything scary. I still have recurrent nightmares featuring velociraptors after watching Jurassic park.

I am still in my fluffy place and not even thinking about scary things. <skips along happily>

Yay, SWCBS! I missed you!

Pfft, you donut like Jurassic Park? But but but... best film ever! (although granted the velociraptors are terrifying)

Clever girl

Ciao sluts!
How's everyone? I miss y'all!

Oh oh hey I have half a pot of bare essencuals in light that I don't want, I bought it and used it but then found out there is an even lighter shade which suits my skin better. Does anyone want the pot of light?

Yo Never you can do a whole line in one go

HTH

What velociraptors really looked like (according to new science). Less threatening? I've never watched Jurassic Park though.

Can I shorten your handle to Shameless, SWCBS? [winning smile]

It doesn't seem to work for me on the tablet, Erik <pouts at having to type out individual strikethroughs>

Hello everyone! Have nothing else useful to add - haven't read anything for ages, my Googleporn button has seized up from inactivity, haven't written anything.
What the hell has happened to my life ?

I dunno, I've been cleaning the new house (why didn't they clean it when they left, like nice people eh?), and talking to an old ff-writer/beta friend about reusable nappies.

WHAT'S HAPPENED TO ME!!

Lol, I've done it the other way round: I used to clean my house and chat about reusable nappies, now I just stick woth ff and general slut-bunting.

I feel a namechange coming on...

<twirlds>

Omg I even got a typo on the new name. Ah well, no shame!

Effin hell.

I jeffing love you ladies! You make me laugh and smile!
all round! because my career is going to shit so we might as well all get shitfaced!

Love you too Team!

Luff you all too!

I love all y'all. I've missed you.

Quite happy to be known as Shameless, Never.

Evil, Dream and I are plotting a trip to Cambridge <nods>

<runs in dragging blankie>

I lufffs you all toooo!!

Dreaaaammmmm!

Incidentally, I imagine 'typose' to be somewhere where you lie about, ie 'repose' while making typos. And I do a lot of reposing me. Typos too. Ndondo

Hurrah, Cambridge! It's going to be a minimeet!

Omi, love the new name, though I'm sad to see the demise of Lrrr

Lrr can live on, Evil. Always.

In fact, I should get a nice pic of Lrr for my twitter account. Actually, his missus: Ndnd.

TSCon2012 ANNOUNCEMENT: I have proposed 20th October as the date

Anyone got any ideas for what we do?

You should all meet in Paris.

<admiring>

Ooh
I can totes possibly do 20th October but cannot promise, I donut know what sort of homework I will have to do on the weekends yet.

Fantastic. Now who has an empty house on the 20th? I am happy to travel. If money were no object, Paris would be luverly. <daydreams>

Evil, are you trying to scare me?

I have this recurrent one where I am trapped in pontins, trying to escape the combination of a couple of raptors and a t-rex. Though maybe it's the whole Pontins thing that's scaring me...

is 20th October half term?

ah, no it's not. Not here, anyway.

you are all welcome here. Should this occur, the drunkest person will have to be filmed climbing onto the top bunk to sleep.

Where's 'here', Pfft? That was the one possible weekend for me (middle weekend of our school hols), but DH has decided we should take the DC away in the holidays . Might be possible though.

In case anyone was interested, my Kirk/Bones comment fics are now linked from my LJ masterlist. I can't be doing with copy-pasting them all into my own LJ, so if you want to read them you'll have to join the Jim-and-Bones community. There are ten of them, most in the region of 500 words or so.

Ooh, Evil, I shall peruse those later.

Hurrah!

I have taken the cats to prison and done the packing, in half an hour or so DH and I will be on the train ready for our couple of days away, because we have been married for three years tomorrow!

Congratulations and well done! Happy anniversary, Evil and Mr Evil

Three years? Congratulations!

<reminisces about when anniverseries where still acknowledged, let alone celebrated>

here is Birmingham

Congrats, EG

I've got a weekend away with some girlfriends booked in for the 27th Oct, so doubt very much I could get away with gallivanting the weekend before too! Sorry!

Just seen some photos of myslef at wedding and thinking of namechanging to TeamQueenofAdipose.

Oh 20th will have to see what I can do. It is dh bday the day before not sure if we will be doing anything. Would like to come but will have to see if my monies will stretch that far (big hol just after then so saving monies for that )
Happy anniversary to the Evils (Shh don't tell anyone but it is our 20th coming up v soon . Needs I am so very old emocon)

Team I just went on fb and thought how glorious you were looking in that dress!

i always hate myself in photos, I look so much nicer in my head

Evil happy anniversary! It's a lovely thing to celebrate

Birds, I plan on writing all day tomorrow and hope to have something to email you by the evening. I keep changing my mind about the bit I'm on - but I'm sure a seven-hour child-free stretch of time will sort it.

Oh good. Is ds at school? I hope it goes really well.

Happy anniversary to the Evils!

Team, you looked totes amazing

I'm working on the 20th so can't make this one. But I (hopefully) have bd2 with Omi to look forward to.

No school, just my lovely parents.

Tilly, watching BD2 with you has been something I've been looking forward to all year. You are not allowed to watch it with anyone else.

Also, thank you, Disordery or your review - it was lovely to read it first thing this morning, and just what I needed to spur me on to get more of my present fic done today.

*for

<lives up to name>

Child free time sounds lovely Omi.

It is lovely!

I just checked on ffn, and most of my scene breaks were missing for Sleeping Dragon (after each change in PoV), so well done Disorderly for wading through without them! I've put them back in now.

Ok, pm or email me your haikus for the sekrit thing by Friday folks (this Friday, the 21st), and I will post them all at the weekend. So far I have received/written: zero haikus.

So I should really get onto that...

Oh bum. I wrote mine down so I wouldn't forget it and it's now somewhere in a box...

About to unplug the router - speak to you in 2 weeks!

Oh! Oh noes, but good luck with it all, TeWi. Moving house, yippee!

I don't know if i can write haiku, but it's such a good idea.

If anyone else does one, can you put it on other sekrit place, to possibly inspire me?

I have done one now, but still battiling with dd who keeps getting out of bed and who earlier on grilled me about death while ds threw things at me. I floated through it all, serene, after my lovely quiet day.

Tilly gets a gold star: she has sent me some gorgeous haikus.

thank you

Yours are amazing though (as always!)

We are all amazing, and I want more amzing haikus. <does the teacher look>

I find it very, very easy to start channelling the teacher vibe.

<sits up straight, finger on lips>

Speaking of teaching, we had a curriculum meeting today with ds2's teacher, wtf is partitioning all about?? It makes absolutely no sense to me, despite her & dh trying to explain it to me (maths not my forte)

Partioning it breaking it into small chunks which you use simple mathes on so 35 plus 65 is partioned such that you do 5 +5 = 10, 30+ 60 = 90 then 10+90 = 100. or at least that was how i understood it. THe current system likes to apply fancy names to stuff just to confuse the parents.

Well, it's just breaking numbers up so that they're easier to work with. I would say more, but I'm dead rusty.

But have another gold star for asking.

What Bitchy said. Except that I'd do the tens first, as it gives you a good idea of what he answer will be. (90 is pretty close to 100)

And a gold star for Bitchy for such a clear explanation.

I am totes bringing gold stars to TSC.

Thanks for the explanation Bitchy, but I know I'm going to get into a muddle when ds1 brings it home. I just don't know what's wrong with columns <wanders away muttering about new-fangled things>

Allegedly sticking it in columns means that when you get to use decimal points a lot of kids mix up where they go as they misallign them. The use of partitioning is supposed to get them recognising the correct information to put together. At least that is what ds' school said last year. Not entirely certain I believe them though. i still reckon it is just to confuse the parents.

Omi are you going to give a gold star to the waiter this year?

tilly, I did ask DD's teacher a few years ago what was wrong with 'chimney sums''. She looked then said it doesn't teach them to add up in their heads - you don't do a chimney sum in your head. I said "I think I do actually."

She sighed, shook her head and walked away.

Erik how was today?

I'm not sure we'd be welcome back after the pitable tip we gave last time.

tilly i read that as "new-fangirled"

Of course you did, Birds

Neon, but exactly!!!

Hello! <waves>
First day of big school was great lots of deja vu feelings watching the young'uns looking lost about campus, and I made 3 new friends

Are you discussing Maths?

I made a profile on guardian soulmates. No picture though, I'm not ready to actually meet anyone. I just wanted to window shop [frin]

Happy anniversary mr and mrs evil!

Erik - I believe I might know one of your class mates. Same school, same course I think, but might be different site. Glad you have had a good day! Must have brought back some memories though. Did they ever finish the multistore car park they proposed? (by the med school). Enjoy the window shopping!

Respect to Erik. You don't fuck about, do you? Have you considered going into life coaching? Or writing a motivational, self-help type book?

I promised to write a haiku, but the muse ran away screaming deserted me. Maybe a 24 hour deadline will motivate me. And look, strikethrough worked!

I am all about the 24-hour deadline.

Erik, you are just wonderful. That is all anyone needs to know about you.

Hahaha fanks shall I put that on my profile??
Bitchy there isn't a multi storey car park as far as I can see, but it is super duper modern and smart. And everything is online! Amazing! And wifi everywhere! I feel like a dinosoar as when I was here the first time we all had to physically walk to another building to check emails. I'm v excite. Bit worried about money but hopefully it will all be ok. [denial]
Where will tsc 2012 take place? If London I could probably come up for lunch but I will have DS, is he allowed?

Never, I am very bossy and adore telling people what to do helping people to facilitate change in their lives which is why I'm in social work I suppose! But I need to take my own advice I think

Omi, I only work when I have a deadline. I'm the queen of last minute. It has served me well enough in the past

Oh hey I have a question. Now I'm a student with no income and a single parent do you think I'd get legal aid or whatnot? I kind of want to file for divorce but it costs nearly £400 - even if we go halves it's still more than I can spare.

I should really come down and look. I remember when the med school was just a carpark and the halls I was in in my second year was earmarked for the Post grads very very glad they changed that rule Oh and the excitement when we got our own computer room and we got a key code for 24hr access. Wish I had attempted my post grad there.

Right today needs to be a kick ass on the housework/paperwork front.

Erik, I think you probably would - here but you then have to pay the costs back if you recover money or property I think. Don't think that would apply to your situation though? LA solicitors do tend to be, umm, not as good - but if you're doing an amicable split and sorting out all of the arrangements yourselves and just asking the Court to rubber stamp them, as it were, then you'd probably be fine.

What is this haiku thing you have all been talking about?

I shall pm you about the haikus, Penguin.

A gold star to Penguin for prompt haikuing!

Ooh penguin I forgot you know about these things! Thank you. We have no money or property, he has a small property in morocco which I put about £2.5k into but it falls under Moroccan law and tbh he wants DS to inherit it, I don't think he would ever sell it so I'm happy for that to stay out if it. And if he sells it anyway <shrug>
Ta for that x

Found some time to catch up on this thread at last.

Good luck Erik!

Glad the review helped inspire you Omi. Thanks for a great story. Can I have one of those gold stars for reading my first gay wizard lemon?!

Slippery slope, Disorderly...

Penguin

I have a couple of slightly oddball recs.

The Merman's Concubine which is the story of Draco, er being a Merman's Concubine. It's really good, honest.

These Boots which is Draco / Albus Severus and a shoe fetish. Again, I promise it's well worth a read.

Erik, they wer talking about this today on the radio bargain divorces

Gold star for Disorderly for coping my most citrusy lemons so far.

Birds, I have no time for reading! Too busy writing... DS isn't very well today, so lots of tv. And a bit of writing for me.

Omi, YHM.

And a gold star for Never, too.

Good luck, Disorderly!

Ta Omi. I've cobbled something together finished it now. Feeling lazy tonight.

Dd woke us up at 5am today. I am very glad that she didn't due this yesterday, when I'd been to bed at 2am. I am all yawny now, but I think after I've taken her to school, I will drive ds around until he falls asleep (he's still not well and has also been up since 5) and have a nice lie down myself.

Due? Do, obviously. I would blame the lack of sleep, or the ipad, but I think that I just have to accept that it's just me....

Morning all. I have had a VERY nice couple of days, IYKWIMAITY'AD. And thank you for all the nice anniversary wishes!

Today I will be frantically trying to finish my sekrit fic - I can't believe I've had so long and I've left it until the last day! I may end up posting it unbeta'd, but Omi, if you have any time today I will send it to you first. Sorry for being so ridiculously last minute

I'll knock out a haiku or two too

I have time. And as I said before, I know all about the last minute. Also I am going to heave a monster fic your way next weekend, so I can't really complain.

Of course I have to write said monster fic first. <panics>

I will post the haikus on Sunday, if that helps.

Also, so great that you had a good time away!

I got some epically brilliant reviews for CBB last night. The first one, for the first chapter is simply: "wow, downer". I cried laughing. I kill off Edward in the first chapter, Jasper spends the entire story being completely miserable, and "wow, downer" sums it up beautifully. Fantastic And even better when my whole "haha I shall fool the reader" storyline WORKED, and then the reader gets annoyed because they didn't see the truth. It's been so long since I thought about this story, it's great to see someone's thoughts.

I'm trying to think how to respond to the reviewer - I probably can't say how much they made me laugh, can I?

I'm the last petson to give advice about reviews - the wtf ones are always the hardest.

My favourite are the one-word reviews (I just got one).

Morning all! <kicks tumbleweed away.

<changes name to TeamQueenofMissedDeadlines>
I was off sick during report writing time. At beginning of term Head said, Do them soon. Then she wanted them in on Friday (yesterday). I still have 4 left to write and am procrastinating on interwebs instead. I FEAR NO DEADLINE! HEAR ME ROAR!
She can have 'em on Tuesday and like it. <blows raspberry>

Erik, v exciting about going to big school! I am thinking about retraining for summat else, but don't know what yet. Do know the fees would probably cripple us though
<goes to look up post-grad courses in slutbunting and googleporning>

I spent yesterday in a fug of headachey, rage-filled depression and wanted to quit my job and kill everyone I met. This morning, I got my period. Bring on the fucking menopause.

Sympathies, Team and Never.

So SLU rules:
#1 No shame
#2 Something to do with pee/poo, I can't remember it but I'm pretty sure ds inspired it: Don't shit on the kindle, perhaps?
#3 FEAR NO DEADLINE! HEAR ME ROAR!

Disorderly, fb - someone needs to invite you. And I still can't quite believe that you did that.

Also, sorry to buck the trend, but I am happy because I actually got a whole night's sleep (for once), and I'm ahead of my weekly/daily writing targets, and it's Saturday so I don't need to pick DS up for two days (like actually pick him up / carry him / drag him out of someone's front garden or the road) so my back will be feeling better for a while.

Yesterday when DH complained about doing DS's nappy (he only wears one to poo, I would say tmi, but see above rules), I told him that if he wanted I could leave the house at 7.30am and return at 7.30pm this weekend, and he could enjoy the kids all day, just like I did. No more complaints.

I could, not u (shaky hands as well as voice)

It is a sekrit fb group - no one else can see the posts.

Good luck, and er, imagine them naked?

Also rule 3 could go two ways - it could mean you fear no deadline as you hand everything in early..l.

The skerit group is completely locked down. No one I have on my friends list other then those on here know it exists. Also a few have a slut bunting fb account with mn name on. Good luck with the pitch!

I'm quite happy to be flouting deadlines

I'm quite to discover the underwire poking out of my favourite bra though.

<toddles off to spend a small fortune on Bravissimo>

Oh! And how did the pitch go?!

Yeah, sekrit FB group is pretty well hidden. My family who are FB friends don't know it exists, so that's good for me.

Today I am feeling sad. I think it must be hormones or something (day 8 today), there have been tears for very little reason.

<fistpump>
Result! Replacement bra was in the sale!

<does happy dance>
<shakes booty for EG's amusement>
<hands over instead>

Congrats team!
<pours more >

I am back from an eventful trip to the park. Am now willing to ignore ds while I beta for Evil.

Thanks everyone, 90 min wait to pitch surprisingly calmed me down. Went well, she asked me to submit whole ms, which is good.
But the advice on my 1st page was opposite to advice from publisher from last weekend.

Yay for in the sale bras!

Dis, sounds good (last night & today!). I guess if you're going to submit to that agent you follow her advice, and then swap it for another submission? Good luck with it, sounds like you're getting some interest which is amazing.

I took dses to cinema this morning, so dh has taken them to the park now.

I Added in some exposition, on the advice of Faber, but agent today pointed out those exact bits, said they were "tell not show." Either I'm doing 1st person exposition wrong, or I never should have added it in. <writing dilemma>

Anyway, Caught Looking by Marvar has updated, someone else here is reading that too, sorry cant remember who.

Is it drarry or Twi Disorderly?

not that it matters immediately as off out and running late. again

Exciting stuff, Disorderly, either way, and well done for getting through it!

I am more cheerful now, DH and I have got a film and some beer to watch this evening, and I have the time in which he cooks dinner to sort out my sekrit fic, after Omi's comments - thank you so much!

SEKRIT FIC IS POSTED! Hurrah! Thank you, Omi, you are the bestest beta that there ever was

I fell off the thread again!

Ooohhh disorderly! How exciting!

I'm working this weekend.... all part of my attempts to keep single slef busy.... never mind busy, I'm flipping exhausted!

And quite excitingly, once I went out 'alone' to an event I previously would have gone to with ex or swcbs, turns out I was kinda wanted and cared about and had friends. I can't actually keep up with all the people who want to do stuff, they don't fit in my schedule!

I also appear to have 4 different dates lined up....

<shattered and keeping warm under blankie>

Love you all sluts!!

I have just growled my dc into bed. How bloody dare they disrupt Dr Who!

Erm wow? And to think my evening consisted of manhandling a nice young thing. I think you have all out done me tonight. I particuarly love team's growling the children into bed.

I have been up for an hour. Bloody children.

Disorderly, I think I'd rather Voldemort, actor-wise, or Snape than the young 'uns.

Evil, your sekrit fix was lovely, and I liked the new bits. And considering how much you've done for me, betaing is always a pleasure.i

Also, DREAM! Hello! It sounds like things are going ok for you.

And, Bitchy, manhandling? Sounds like fun.

Morning all. I am in the rare position of being awake before DH. It's weird!

Dream, sounds like life is being good to you - good to hear!

Dream, good to hear you sounding happy

Dis, it did sound like an amazing night!

Omi, boo for early mornings

Dh is playing golf today so I'm going to take ds1 to rugby and then I think we'll have a movie day! Judging from the grey outside, I think it's going to be the perfect day for snuggling on the sofa.

By some miracle the kids slept until 745 this morning...amazing, I'm pretty sure the parents will hate me!

Bitchy, a post that cries, nay screams for further information to be provided!

Chick maintaining 4.30 is an acceptable wake up time. I think he may actually be a Russian spy trying to get info out of me & I am quite ready to squeal from the rooftops in exchange for more than 3 hours sleep at a time.

How did SG's wedding go, have they posted to say?

I saw pics of the venue on twitter, it looked absolutely beautiful.

Morning! (just about)
I didn't sleep worth shite, our plans for the day are scuppered by weather, and dp has announced he is coming down with something.

Apart from that it's all good

Boo for lack of sleep. And rain. Dh just watched the weather forecast: the words 'torrential downpour' were used three times.

We are heading out for lunch, and hoping that ds will fall asleep in the car so that we have more than 10 minutes eating time.

Ouch Pengiun. I remember those days. (just) It does get better.

Omi it was fun, alot of laughter was had not quite sure what else I can say about it tbh.

Is Penguin the new member in the sekrit group?

I thought that was disorderly? Never

Ah. Thanks Bitchy.

Not me, don't have FB or Twitter account <luddite>

you do have a pm though

Never and Penguin, I've pmd you both a quick question..

wedding photos on sekrit LJ place now
very lovely!

Ooh. Can somebody link please?

As is our post!

I can do a link to photos on fb...

Now to get back to the weekly homewordk struggle.

Just wondering. I'll send you a friend request now.

Morning all. Glorious weather today.

A typical conversation, chez Omi:

Me: What's DS doing?
DD: [Very offhand] Oh, Daddy says he's destroying the living room. As usual.

We have had tantrums already today, lots of tears, a small flood and DS is still running around naked. <deep breaths>

Morning chaps. ds3 slept but then we all woke at 5.30 am
it is pissing it down like there's no tomorrow
hd career fair starts tomorrow, woohoo!
Hope your day improves, Omi (and all)

Well, one of my lovely friends is going to take dd to school for me so I don't need to struggle with DS (who is currently still naked) in the rain.

Woohoo for new HD fics to read soon! It feels like I haven't read a new one in ages.

Today I may try to get DS new shoes, but this may be madness on my behalf and I may give up half way through.

Omi, could you do an online shoe purchase? Taking him out sounds like it could lead to excess later

Do you have to be on FB to see wedding pics?

Or have a LJ account, I think, Penguin.

Hola chicas
I met a man! A nice normal one I think. I can't see how I will have time to see him again as he lives in London but I had a lovely weekend

Fab news, Erik.

Hurrah! Good news, Erik

If any of you are after any Star Trek Kirk/McCoy porn, then go read this. It's just perfectly them, to the point that I now assume this happened in the movie, it just didn't make it on-screen.

Penguin, photos here.

Evil, I just got what looks like a dodgy email from you. Is it legit?

"Jim assumes that noise comes from him, but it's way too feminine in pitch to acknowledge. Luckily, it gives way to a moan, much more manly..."

Yep, that totally happened

Ofsted.

I should be panicking, but I'm not - because I've been told not to go in on those days

No, ignore emails from me from the last ten minutes or whatever. I've just been changing my passwords. Stupid email

Tilly, so glad you agree! It's a great little fic

Team, how How do you feel about it?

Erik, ditto really - meeting a man is great, meeting a man nowhere near you is not great. Although when I met dp he lived 300 miles away.

Omi I have just pissed around all evening but will email tomorrow, definitely.

Evil, I got one too. Looks verreh dodgy!

Well when I met H he lived 2400 miles away so London is an improvement! I'm sure it will be possible to see him again. I'm really not ready for a real relationship anyway. Did I mention he is a photographer? And from brazil? Phwoar.

Just thought I'd add that iPhone wanted to correct phwoar to phenobarbital

Erik, glad you had a good weekend, you deserve some happiness!

Evil, it slotted in so nicely with the film, it was a fun read

Erik, glad you had a good weekend of bonking.

Re work - I feel relieved that I won't be observed, but the cynic in me wonders if I am just being hidden from the inspection team. But I'm not sure I even give a shiny shit about it. Whatevs.
I have my first telephone counselling session tomorrow afternoon.

yay, Erik! Well done, missy, I am quite jealous.

Team

I don't know what to say.

Hope counselling goes well, Team. I am sorry about work. Whatever the reason, at least you don't have the stress of it.

Erik yay for unreal relationships with Brazilian photographers.

Ds2 is having an immense meltdown. I think being the middle child is totally getting to him, and he's tired, and he's 4. And he's thrown water all over the dining room. Oh lord.

Team, hope the counselling session is ok

Erik, you deserve all of the Brazilian photographers but probably best to stick to just one for now . Yay for dirty weekends but a distant memory

The H and I did US-London for 4 years so London-Brighton seems eminently do-able as no doubt is he

Team, I'd just count your blessings and not bother trying to second guess it frankly.

Career fair has opened with my Knight Bus prompt!! Woohooooo! I have no time to read it and I should not even be on the internet, but I could not resist peeking and now I am so excited <hugs self>

oh it's here although part of me wants nobody else to read it first till I have had a chance, LOL

I will wait until you read it then, birds. But so cool that your prompt was first!

Ds and I have been shopping. It turns out that having the buggy, half-starving your child first (no lunch) and then lots of sandwiches and a packet of crisps = shoe shopping without meltdown. Although I think that the empty shop and not having to wait may have helped too.

Yay to meltdown free shopping omi!
Brilliant yours was the first prompt Birds.

It is miserable out there. One meltdown, lots of shouting later and ds is watching a dvd and I have gone back to bed. Early nights all around I think.

Meltdown-free shopping ftw!

Birds, have you read it yet? <impatient>

Started to reread Turn today, had forgotten just how brilliant it is

LOL you can read it! I am going to savour it and make it last all evening. Just don't spoil me yet. I have read the first few paragraphs and guffawed a bit already. So exciting!

Is anyone reading it? Come and tell me if you think it's by who I think it's by

Not reading it yet but can tell you now I'll have no idea who wrote it!

I have been out, but will climb into bed an start reading it then, birds.

READ IT READ IT
soooo good
I'm nearly at the end but I keep slowing down so I don't finish it yet

Great story! The knight bus is, IMHO, an underexplored detail in fanfic. That fest had an excellent calibre of writer last time around too.

Now I feel nervous about my own story appearing. I have a hunch that it won't post until the very end. But I am looking forward to reading a fic I betad. <innocent whistle>

DH us making ne watch Avatar. it"s shit. Would rather ve reading potterporn

Lovely story, I enjoyed that. And surprisingly, I think I do have an idea of who wrote it (though I'm probably wrong!)

Lord I hated Avatar. There's a bit before the final battle where all the blue things say 'This is our final stand' or something equally dull inspiring, and the H just leaned over and said 'Is it wrong that I'm rooting for the humans to make it a short one'. 3 precious hours of my life that I'll never get back.

I enjoyed the Knight Bus story, Birds. Not the greatest Drarry I've ever read but perfectly entertaining!

I am currently re-reading Dracula which I downloaded free from Kindle onto my phone. Now that's a vampire.

I am in a bad mood today. Sometimes parent support groups are wonderful, sometimes they are a huge downer. Plus while I was out I missed my laptop delivery, so now have wait until tomorrow. <grumble grumble>

I need to be writing, but I'm just not feeling it. Struggling on anyway though. <grits teeth>

Me too Omi. Sympathies.

3 sick kids, can't get any writing housework done, and Twitter is the work of the devil.

Hugs, Omi and Disorderly

Penguin, I quite liked Avatar at the cinema - it's very beautiful. The plot was not great though, and it was a good hour too long. The main thing I didn't like about it, though, was that they didn't pay homage to Aliens and it would have been so easy! They had Sigourney Weaver and one of those lifty robot things, why the hell wouldn't they put the two together even for a tiny moment?

Tilly, I have another Kirk/McCoy rec. This one is utterly beautiful from start to finish, and is a bit longer than they often are too.

I saw Avatar at the cinema. I was a little distracted though, because DH got up quite early on, to go to the loo, and he never came back. It turns out that seeing things in 3D makes him feel ill. I assumed that maybe he'd sat near the exit or something, but when the film finished and I waited for everyone to come out, I soon realised that he wasn't there at all. My phone was out of batteries, so I had to borrow some stranger's one to ring him: he'd been sat in the car for the past two hours or so.

That was a fun night out. Not.

Omi your story is going to be fabulous. The career fair one and the one you are writing now.

Still hugging myself with career fair glee. I am hoping for a month of lovely entertaining fics and awesome art.

I had a crappy day but I don't care because i'm thinking about wizards.

and [flapjacks] all round!

Avatar has the laziest script EVER! Seriously, "unobtainium"? 3D, SFX and art direction made it worth watching, in the cinema, once.

Am half way through Foundations again. Made me cry, again The Casual Vacancy should be on my Kindle app when I get home from work tomorrow, so that'll be my weekend's reading. Will Jo have writen some secks? Can't wait to find out.

Did you read that review in the New Yorker, Never? I liked when JKR said that 'you don't have sex near unicorns. It's an ironclad rule. It's tacky'.

Team, thanks for the flapjacks. Birds, thanks for the reassurance, I managed to write a bit today and cheered myself up with today's Career fest fic (and I guessed the author straight away! Not a SLU but someone I know on interwebs...).

And I'm going out for dinner with friends tonight. No wine, no talking about ds, and it should all go smoothly.

<steals flapjacks>

Dream! <big smooch> How are you?

I'm a teeny bit so poorly and rundown, but its nearly the weekend and all will be fine!

Boo for being rundown. But yahay for only two more days until the weekend (one more for you, hey?).

Couldn't remember where I had seen it. Unicorns comment is up there with Chekhov's advice to writers Have a good night out.

<swipes last corner of flapjack while Dream is distracted>

I am such a donkey. I've arranged quite complicated plans for tomorrow to do with the boys' classes, and meeting people and things. And then I suddenly remembered that I've booked an online shop to come at the same time we're meant to be somewhere else in town, and arranged for a babysitter to come when the boys are at a class.

<eats flapjack and boils head>

Birds that is the sort of thing that I do.

Evening Dream

Have a nice time Omi

I have lost the fic love atm

Excellent Trek recs evil.

Bitchy, it happens. I'm just getting over a fic break and am starting to get back into it again. It helps that there's a Drarry fest (though I know you don't do gay wizards)

Omi, have a lovely evening

Have a teensy bit of work to do & then I'm diving into the new career fic & the ST one

Quick confession: I got the day wrong, I'm going out tomorrow (luckily I checked before heading out). I'm now sat on bed sttempting to write.

Glad you're liking them, boldly! I'm slowly working my way through Tribble's rc lists and putting my favourites on here. I suppose I should really make my own rec list at some point.

Could be worse, Omi. A colleague once took a busload of teenager 100 miles away to a career fair, only she was a week early.

Evil, I am steadfastly refusing to join another fandom, so stop making ST sound appealing

Oh dear. Dh took my kindle to read on the tube: it is full of filthy ff. There is some non-ff on it, but what was the last thing I was reading? <wracks brains>

ha! ha! Dp is now expressing an interest in reading some of the H/D lurve. I am stalling and saying 'you wouldn't like this one' etc.

I also had a dream about our window cleaner last night. Thus ends my confession.

I don't like it when I dream about rl people, it feels a bit icky for some odd reason

Omi, oh dear! Dh had a little peek at my kindle when we were on holiday, it was a Twi-fic, & it was on quite a filthy bit <remembers no shame allowed>

Go on, Never, read the ST, it's great... Jim and Bones are gorgeous character, give them a try

Despite being such an enabler, DH has no interest in reading fic. He's read most of mine, but nothing else. I doubt he'd bat an eye if he read my kindle though, he'd just page over to something else. At least I have a "fic" folder and a "books" one so he's unlikely to stray across it by accident.

He does quite often laugh and sing Shaft if he knows I'm reading porn, though...

Never, I second evil re ST. It's such a rich world, it's really built for ff, like HP.

A parcel just arrived and it is just the right shape and size to be The Casual Vacancy. BUT it's not my birthday til tomorrow <sitting on naughty present opening hands>

I have a separate ff folder, which he would avoid normally, but I probably was in the middle of reading smug, knowing me.

I haven't ordered a Casual Vacancy. I may get it for the kindle - I have a few new books I need to buy/read. Next week, when I have time!

And happy birthday for tomorrow, birds - does that mean you get a bit of time off?

Also, my laptop is here! I've stuck ds on the wii so I can have a quick play with it, but then I'm hiding it.

There are now 3 Casual Vacancy size parcels here from Amazon. I suppose it is the obvious birthday present for a big Harry Potter fan? LOL.

Omi dp has the day off and we are planning to go birdwatching with the boys. It's all thrills here

That sounds lovely.

This week I keel dreaming about old boyfriends and old crushes. Last night was the boy I had a crush on aged about 15. He was a frightful bore (in my dream: in RL he was most dashing, or so I thought at the time).

My dangerous ex, the 'utterly hopeless together, would never have worked, but saucier beyond the dreams of Mr Heinz and altogether Mr What If' contacted me on Linked In this week. His profile has a photo. It was a close call but I did manage to delete the request <proud> And have been rewarded for my behaviour by a couple of cracking dreams. IYKWIMAIKY'AD.

There must be something in the water - I've had a couple of dreams about "not quite but it so could have happened" boyfriends. It's so delicious to work through the what-ifs without having to actually deal with the RL reality of worrying about what to wear, being stood up or endless wondering if he's really into you. In your dreams your hair is never frizzy, you saunter effortlessly in killer heels, you have a faultless wardrobe and not only is he into you, but every other chap is also salivating at the vision of dream-perfect you.

My ex (not my crush) looked a little rockstar-ish in a dream the other night. But even in the dream we were still epically unsuited. I stumbled upon some messages of the we're-grown-up-now-no-hard-feelings-sorry-I-broke-your-heart kind while on FB the other day, which has probably prompted me most recent dreams.

I am on the new laptop. It is luverly, and I am happy. As are the kids, who are watching a film on the telly.

And look! Still making typos. I think that this means that I probably have no one to blame but myself.

Team, every other chap is salivating at the vision of me, isn't he? <dreamworld shatters>

I don't even have any exes, dangerous or otherwise. Crushes, though, I have a-plenty If only teenage-me had had even half of the confidence of current-me. All those wasted opportunities... Ah well, at least DH is a pretty good catch.

God I have 2 exes that I used to regularly dream about. I am so stupid, I get completely upset when I wake up from the unrealistic romance of it all. I am very happy with Mr Birds, but he can't compete with the perfection of dreamland sex gods worshipping me and my non-frizzy hair

Luckily these days i am too knackered for those kind of dreams, so I just get "the window cleaner is in my shower and dp is on his way home' instead I didn't even DO anything with him so i don't know why he was in the shower

Am FB friends with a teenage crush (who asked me out but I turned him down. Why? Why? <shakes sense into 16 year old self>)He competes in triathlons now, and still makes my heart pound when I talk to him. We rarely speak, though, and I would never admit it to anyone in RL. especially not to DH who would laugh and probably tell crush

As for dreams, the amitriptyline ensures that I don't have them. I love a good hot n horny dream, myself.

It is a down side of the stuff isn't it Never.

Although even when on it I still dream. My dreams would bore you all as they are all training dreams. I day dream training too. I think I need a stronger dose on amytrip rather then less. Would appear i have a few issues

I reckon it's worth it for a guaranteed night's sleep though, Bitchy. And I appear to have a low tolerance for drugs, so I need very little. DH said I was slurring my words before I passed out after taking nurofen plus the other night. I worry sometimes that I wouldn't hear the DCs if anything happened and DH works nights.

Hellooo. Are long time lurkers with no children (thank fuckery. I'm 20 and would probably leave the poor thing on a bus somewhere without noticing...) in my 3rd year at uni.

Love reading various fanfic (mostly Harry Potter, with a bit of Sherlock too). Love Sara's Girl (Foundations particularly!), little0bird (not slash, just good) and GatewayGirl...

Am I allowed to come and play?

We love fresh meat new posters, especially if they have a store of hitherto undiscovered fic recs. We are an equal opportunities recruiter. The only necessary qualification is a complete lack of shame. Welcome

(I suspect most people are off reading The Casual Vacancy, but I'm saving myself for the weekend)

Welcome! Having children by no means essential (let's be honest: this probably isn't quite what Justine and Carrie had in mind when they began MN, is it?), you just need a love of fic.

Are you reading the Career fair fics? (H/D) How much HD/Drarry/HP stuff have you read? Do you read on LJ or FFn or somewhere else?

I am super nosey and have many more questions. But basically many of us started as lurkers, and anyone who loves fanfic is welcome here.

I babysit a lot when I'm at uni, which is why I started using mumsnet. It's a pretty grim area where I live and I'm a bit out of touch having had a semi-feral childhood in the wilds of nowhere! And then I found this by accident and have lurked since before you got into Drarry (since Ride was popular?). So most recs from then I've got into, including some Twific. Only I'm not such a fan of the books or film so found it hard to enjoy the fanfic? Twinned I really liked though.

I read on LJ, FFn and AO3 and some off skyehawke, but mostly FFn as I can moderate the searches easiest. And put stuff on my kindle... I'm a bit lazy like that! Not following the Career fair unless it's been directly linked to on here. Last thing I read was th Albus/Draco one, where he can sense the truth on someone... Liked it a lot!

Never, Ds has always been able to rouse me when he has needed me in the night. It's just mornings and during the day that i seem to lack get up and go on the amytrip. Also stupid sensitive and the doc has had to play around with the dose for a normal maintenance dose where I can function and then the dose which I go up to when it is all going a bit tits up migrain wise.

I have just spent the two hours inflicting pain on myself. I am officially insane. However, I am not bothered with giving JKR any more money unless it is worth the read. Although right now time to read it lacking. Sleep is now needed. A whole 6hrs

Evening Smoothie.

Night all, wishing lie ins to those that can and wish them <sprinkles sleeping dust in chick's direction>

If we call you Smoothie then you can join the seven little... group, along with Pervy, Dreamy, Bitchy etc.

It sounds like you've been here for ages! Just keep posting, I love it when a lurker comes out of the woodwork.

I had a coffee after dinner, so now I'm up while DH snoozes. I'm writing smut though, so it's not wasted time. And if I get to bed by 2am, that's still at least 5hrs sleep, which I can deal with.

Wow, you are a proper longtime lurker! Welcome to the fold

I'm with Bitchy on the Casual Vacancy. I'm doubtful of JKR's ability to write a proper grown up story, and the giant word count makes me wonder if this is suffering the same lack of editing as the last few HP books. I'm waiting to see what the general consensus is!

Today, I am going into town and getting my hair cut. I shall also be searching for DH's birthday present. Arrrrgh, so difficult to know what to get! I think I'm going to try to get him 30 small things as its his 30th, and I've no clue about big presents so hopefully it will make life a bit easier...

Hi Smoothie, always lovely when lurkers delurk!

Omi, did you have a good evening?

I've got JKR's book on order at the library as I'm not sure if it will be worth the money. I think she'll go back to children's books after this.

Have any of you read the My Immortal HP fic? I heard about it when reading an article. It's really awful, & I think the author pulled it, I think she had a few issues as well. But a couple of people have reposted it on FF, seemingly just to poke fun at the writing and the author which leaves me feeling a bit uncomfortable. There are a few commentaries & spoofs as well. I know when you post on the Internet you are putting yourself out there but surely they shouldn't be reposting a fic that's been pulled? It just seems a bit mean.

<does a little dance>

I'm not the young childless one anymore!

<looks at children surrounding me on day off....>

Hi Smoothie!

I've been reading twific recently, het and slash.,...

I actually thought that the book sounded good in the review I read - but I have a huge backlog of real books to read, so it will have to join the queue.

DS is at school. I don't know what to do with myself.

<realises slef is the old childless one>

Omi, if I were you I'd run amok

I think I'm going to go pay my dinner money arrears and buy some tea bags. <exciting>

Hello again :D Indeed a proper long time lurker, embarrassingly!

Can anyone remind me of the title of the Albus/Draco story? I am failing to find it and my googling skills aren't going well.

Today, I'm making the most of Freshers week an am going to buy a woolie hat from town as all the little ones won't be out yet as they are too hungover

Hello Smoothie!

I'm with Evil and Bitchy on the Casual Vacancy. Her prose is to clunky for me to be interested in anything that doesn't make full use of her amazing plotting ability. So I'm waiting to see.

You need birds, Smoothie. She recced it, I think.

Dinner money paid, tea. Bags bought. And now I'm sitting in the car thinking I may just go wait outside the school until 12 when I pick him up (half day today).

So, I'm in a coffee shop, sat at a little bench in front of the window. There is a quite pretty guy sitting outside right in front of my bit of window, chatting on face time. This means the people he's talking to are basically looking right in at me - so hard not to make eye contact with them! I keep having to hold back giggles...

How did DS's first day go, Omi? I was thinking of him

Omi, I have been known to do that, with my kindle! How did his first day go?

Evil, start pulling faces at them <childish>

It all went well, he was all smiles going in (and I got a kiss goodbye) and all smiles coming out too.

Oh Omi, that is FAB. I am grinning from ear to ear for you both

I am in a great mood. And then we went to the park, and when it was time to go home, he said 'DS go home', which is the first subject-verb-object sentence I have ever heard him construct, and a huge tick in the language development box.

And now I've just seen the latest totally-anonymous-until-reveals career fest fic, featuring some familiar betas: The Haunting of Draco Malfoy.

<Runs in, saves fic, sends all the hugs to Omi & her clever clever boy, runs out>

Omi, I'm so pleased for you both!! Glad he had a good day.

And that totally-anonymous fic will have to wait as I'm off to Birmingham tonight & I haven't even packed!

Great news Omi!

That's amazingly lovely Omi. Soo glad that ds had a good day!

I am so proud of a little boy I have never met. Great news Omi

I have had the day from hell in work. I'm very glad indeed that I'm away at a conference Monday and Tuesday. And then I got home to discover that my 'friend', whom I haven't seen since I rewrote her thesis for her, has apparently been awarded her masters. I got neither confirmation of her results nor a single thank-you for the days I spent working with her or all the panicked phonecalls I fielded. Her husband has just posted a congratulatory message on FB. I feel really hurt and used, TBH.

Yay Omi! How fabulous. So happy for both of you.

Never, what a dicksplat thing to do. Sometimes people are utterly selfish. Still, you know that you did a kind thing helping her.

Smoothie, hello! Nice to meet you, and glad you liked The Consequences of Truth. Can I suggest for your next rec, you read Haunting of Draco Malfoy?

I have had a lovely day in the sunshine - yes SUNSHINE - playing with the boys, and seeing lots of birds. Only 1 copy of The Casual Vacancy luckily, but lots of other fab books including www.amazon.co.uk/Harry-Potter-Screen-Bob-McCabe/dp/0857687751 which is utterly fab, and was given to me by dp wrapped in home made Drarry paper

cocked up my link! I meant this

oh bugger and The Haunting of Draco Malfoy

Never, I bet she wonders why you never answer another of her phonecalls again. Some people really don't see how bad/rude/silly they are.

And thank you, everyone.

Ds is all lovely and cuddly this afternoon, I think he missed me (but in a non-tearful, having lots of fun way) this morning.

Homemade Drarry paper? That is brilliant! And happy birthday?

Never, that is such a shame

Omi, even more pleased with your tales of sentences - bodes well, eh? Like Never, I'm so proud of him!

That's an excellent fan fair if, right there. Who would have guessed?!

happy birthday !*

*fic

<is contracting typo disease>

you stood too close to Omi, it's catching

Birds, your DP is very clever. Give him an approving bumsqueeze from me.

Am underwhelmed with The Casual Vacancy thus far (couldn't help myself, snuck in a couple of chapters). Definitely needs a good beta to screen for cliches. It reads more like fanfic, TBH. Memorable characters though. And I haven't gotten very far into it yet, so all those impressions could change.

Haven't started The C V yet. This made me laugh a lot - "It's wizards after all," says Rowling
I also got a guide to the philosophy of Harry Potter, and that Melissa Anneli book. <spoilt to death>

and by the way, you should perhaps SEE the Drarry wrapping paper before you compliment Mr Birds. It had to be explained to me who they were meant to be. He said "sorry it wasn't something filthy but i don't know how to draw bumming"

Birds. Bloody bloody brilliant.

More Casual Vacancy LOLZ

Does it read like GOOD fanfic, though?

And LOL at "I don't know how to draw bumming"

Actually, Birds's spoof seems to be pretty close to the mark . As for whether it might make good fanfic, well, Jo Rowling is no Sara's Girl.

Everything on the internet is making me laught today

Thankies

CV is not doing it for me... It's just a bit shit?

Oh dear. I might see if I can borrow it from someone, then - it's ludicrously expensive even for kindle at the minute.

There will be loads of copies in charity shops in a few weeks months Evil.

Hey, everyone!

Did we get any further on TSC? Because I am in dire need of gin, and lots of it.

I am tempted to buy the discussed book, but I already have so many sitting there that I haven't managed to get round to yet. I keep telling myself that I am buying them for when I am old and useless and have so much time on my hands. Do you think the TSA will still be porning in 50 years?

That looks right up your street, Disorderly! I doubt I could think of a story myself, but you never know.

And, Pfft, all we have is the dates. Three weeks to go, ladies!

TSA 80: I don't know how to draw bumming

80 threads already?! Cripes!

It's 4.30 & I am totally awake

Pfft, how are you?

Birds, hope you had a good birthday!

As I'm awake, I'm going to carry on reading Turn. I'm u'Up to the ballro sceneom!

Stupid phone

I'm up to the ballroom scene

It is amazing isnt it Tilly, romantic & hawt as fuck (phone tried to insist on duck there, which is quite an image)

Casual visitor doesn't appeal at all to me. I read a review which said it was something like a socialist diatribe wrapped in a cliche

Tilly I hope you got some sleep!

So I skipped Casual Vacancy last night and read the Haunting of Draco Malfoy instead. Very accomplished writing there, and not a typo in sight I love that the author invented a competely new career.

Just looking at the times of some of your posts. Don't you people sleep? <horrified at the very idea of 5.30> I woke up at 7.49, was about to get up and ready for work when I realised it was Saturday. So I am still in bed. Love that feeling.

I got up at 7am and it felt like a lie-in - we get up between 5.30 and 6.30 most days. But then I'd take that any day over the period of time when DD went to sleep at 10pm (no matter what time bedtime was) and woke up at 8am - she seems to only need 10 hours sleep a night.

Oh I like the idea of a socialist diatribe wrapped in a cliche

Rowling had a lovely quote in the Times yesterday: "I chose to remain a domiciled taxpayer for a couple of reasons. The main one was that I wanted my children to grow up where I grew up, to have proper roots in a culture as old and magnificent as Britain’s; to be citizens, with everything that implies, of a real country, not free-floating ex-pats, living in the limbo of some tax haven and associating only with the children of similarly greedy tax exiles.
A second reason, however, was that I am indebted to the British welfare state; the very one that Mr Cameron would like to replace with charity handouts. When my life hit rock bottom, that safety net, threadbare though it had become under John Major’s Government, was there to break the fall. I cannot help feeling, therefore, that it would have been contemptible to scarper for the West Indies at the first sniff of a seven-figure royalty cheque. This, if you like, is my notion of patriotism. On the available evidence, I suspect that it is Lord Ashcroft’s idea of being a mug."

Tilly I had a lovely day, thank you! we had breakfast out and then went to the nature reserve. The weather was perfect. I saw curlews which always make me unfeasibly happy, and some cormorants and other birds I won't bore you with

Turn ballroom scene is probably the holy grail of fanfic, don't you think?

Team, LOL @ proposed thread title. I won't tell dp as it will only go to his head.

Talking of people who can / can't draw: this career fair entry has made me hopelessly over-excited and i keep having to go back to look at it again - Can't we just love and joke around?

Waah
So I'm a bit emotional because I want DS home now but I'm feeling a bit twisted up with the H's nonsense. His tyre blew so he isn't going to make this evening's ferry, not a biggie. He saves £50 by taking the morning ferry anyway. But he drove all night and spent all day sorting out tyre. So far just now he has hung up on me because I couldn't hear him, blamed me for the tyre blowing because I wanted them back ASAP, then announced he is moving back to morocco on the phone.
I fully understand that it's not my fault the tyre blew. I also know that he can't upset me by threatening to move back to morocco and this knee jerk nonsense is how he acts out, and he never sticks to it. But I still have echoes of how upset and twisted I would have felt when we were together.
I don't have to take on his bullshit and I am detached...detached....detached. Yes I am.

Erik I am impressed that you see through his manipulations. Sorry that you have to deal with this (thank goodness you don't have to deal with it all the time...)

I understand him very well, and most of the time he's not a dick, but when he is one, he really is one! He's just brilliant at transferring his shit on to other people me when he can't process it himself. I got so conditioned to take it and try to contain it for him that it's hard to stop sometimes.
Thanks for listening. You guys are my therapy!

I understand him very well, and most of the time he's not a dick, but when he is one, he really is one! He's just brilliant at transferring his shit on to other people me when he can't process it himself. I got so conditioned to take it and try to contain it for him that it's hard to stop sometimes.
Thanks for listening. You guys are my therapy!

Yes it must be very odd to remember it isn't actually your responsibility to sort out his twisted responses to things. At least one of you knows what's going on and how to deal with it!

It's a process of deprogramming! Strange but empowering. It will take a while but I will get there.

Have I admired your amaxingness yet today, Erik? If not, allow me to do so now. You have such strength of character.

DNiece and I have just made chickpea burgers (she's trying vegetarianism for size) and snickerdoodles. I also took 4 children ranging in age from 4 to 11 for a cycle to our local park so my nerves are shot. If you want me, I will be reading with cookies and milk.

Thank you that just made me a bit weepy. It feels all a bit much today. I'm a bit worried about managing the course with DS home and mostly managing to deal with everything without getting stressed. I'll feel much better when my boy is home <3
What is a snickerdpodle?

<passes Erik some homemade chocolate chip fudge>
I just got home from my Great British Bake Off domestic competition. I came in Third. My nemesis was First again, with 34 points. Second place had 16 points and I got 14 points.
Next year, I will get the trophy
<maniacal laugh>

<stuffs face manically with fudge>

Ok, so I need more legal help. The calculator says I'm entitled to legal aid. So should I attempt to fill in the divorce papers myself and apply for legal aid for the filing fees? Or should I actually go to a family law solicitor and get them to do it all?

Did you see that post I put up earlier in the thread about the co-op doing divorces for £90 or something? I think they're trying to get in to financial services. Failing that, is your divorce a bit tricky? Am I right in thinking you didn't actually get married in the UK? Might make a difference in the paperwork so best consult solicitor in that case?

Snickerdoodles are cookies coated in sugar and cinnamon and are addictively delicious.

Team, those things are always a fix. Shall I send someone around to sort out the committee? I am cross because my DNiece didn't win the vegetable sculpture competition because some kid got her mother to carve something off pinterest with a watermelon. Watermelons have no place in county shows. <hoiks bosom decisively>

Oh yes, thank you. I'll have a google. I suppose if I can get a lawyer it might be easier. We got married abroad but it should be quite straightforward as in no assets and I'm quite happy for him to have a good whack of the school holidays.

I'm all right, Tilly. Thanks for asking. Well, maybe not all right. Closer to terrible. But getting by. How are you?

Spent most of the day doing Hello Kitty and Totoro Hama beads with the kids.

What's up pfft?

Sounds like a fix. If she got 34, then they thought that the next best was at least only half as good as hers? No one is ever doubly good at something. She clearly stuffed hers with hash...

One of my housemates has deleted me off FB with the rather damning message " if i was still not over that then why did i bother being friends with you so i deleted you to prove a point"- she's referring to an incident which happened 6 months ago and involved me asking if I'd upset her as she'd been quite quiet around me... Gah!!!

Also. Not sure if this is anyone's thing at all. But. Isolation, a Draco/ Hermione thing is rather good...

Erik, just normal stuff I suppose. Living alone (which is nice, most of the time, and with some things - but then you know how that is), money being very tight, my mother is driving me pretty close to crazy. How are things with you? Don't listen to your H. but then, you know that

Ahh yes I know. It's lonely sometimes isn't it. I'm ok with the split, feel a bit sad at times but not regretful. Right now I'm waiting for my boy to get home, I can't wait. Tomorrow morning inshallah

Have you done any dating yet pfft?

Am off to London and then HP studio tour, woohoo! Hope everyone has a good Sunday.

Erik I hope ds is with you soon.

Hello Pfft, things sound tough with you, sad to hear that.
. Hello Smoothie, sorry about your friend being a dick!

Erik, I hope you're giving your boy the biggest cuddles right now!

Pfft, sorry things are tough & that your mum isn't helping. If you ever want a break, I have a spare room you are most welcome to.

Smoothie, bit of an overreaction on her part eh? I guess she is still upset over whatever it was but would rather be a crap friend than actually talk about it!

Dh has taken the boys off today, so I'm off to a reunion in a bit & then I'm going to snuggle down with loads of fic. I have the career fest to catch up on.

He's here!!!!!!!!

for you, Erik.

Thank you Tilly

Dating? Urgh, no!

Erik

He has grown up about a year in the past month!

Yay for returning boys & boo for hash cakes. As it were.

It is clearly autumn, the Chick is ill for what will no doubt now be a loooong winter. Sigh.

Oh, and the ILs are due in shortly. Louder sigh.

Hope all are having a nice Sun eve <jealous of Evil not having oh no school night stress>

Quick wash of school uniform going on here [bad mum]. I am all sleepy but I should be writing. Mostly though, we are still finishing homework. Oh, and I haven't made dinner yet. [bad bad mum]

let's see what I can have on the table by 7pm....

Cheesestrings on stale bread toast, then Omi?!

Omi, I have school wash as well. I always forget about it & remember 6pm on a Sunday!

We bought the washing machine for its fast wash capabilties.

Yep, me too . Fortunately, ds1's uniform does seem to dry really quickly

Well, dinner will be ready in 5 minutes - I had a ten-minute interruption when DD and fought over her homework. She is now playing on the wii with DH. He can get the last three sentences out of her.

Homemade chicken curry and rice, by the way (although mine will only eat the rice, but we only get to all eat together at the weekend, and I want real food).

If anyone is interested, here's a round-up of week one of the HD Career fair.

Hi fi is nearly done. But not done. iyswim?

I'm looking forward to HiFi being finished, I've been waiting ages to read it!!

So far, I've enjoyed 3 of the career fair fics. One I wasn't so keen on, more because of the subject than the writing, and two I need to read. Just starting The Princess Thief now while ds2 is engrossed in Cbeebies!

Oh feckety feck this fecking machine I had a long post ready, sent it and mumsnet said I had not logged in. Here is a shortened version of what I was going to say.
It was obviously a long time since I had been on here as it has taken me ages to catch up on the thread.
Omi - hope ds ist day at school went well and he is settling in ok.
Never - I love snickerdoodles, got a nigella recipie.
Is the meetup going ahead if so when, I need deets - want to come along but still trying to sort out finances
No fic reading done here for a while as am reading this (a freebie from 'Goodreads' )
www.amazon.co.uk/The-Girl-You-Left-Behind/dp/0718157842

Oh and welcome 'Smoothie'

My children are refusing to eat whatever I cook. It is beginning to piss me off. One is being fussy (dd), the other has a cold and only eats bread and fruit when unwell (ds).

Oh, thank goodness. DH is home, he can deal with them. <heads to bed even earlier than normal>

Today's career fest fic is wonderfully fun: Hairway to Heaven.

It has kept me giggling.

I haven't had time to finish Saturday's yet! Did make time for a minor namechange though. How has everyone's Monday been?

Team, how are you doing? I'm still pissed off about the ofsted thing, on your behalf.

morning chaps, I hope everyone's week is going ok?

Omi, I hope ds has another good day at school today

I am on a bit of a comedown after lovely holiday with friend and visiting HP studio tour. It was all so full of feels, and we met lots of great people. All the staff there are mega fans! Lots of them worked on the films as crew or actors. They seemed so happy to be working there and so excited for us! It was all very cleverly stage managed to make it quite intense and exciting. Each time you felt you had really seen it all, there was more surprises and cleverness. Sigh. Brilliant day..

I want to go now. Tilly, fancy a sneaky day trip?

And I am so slow. Nice nc, Never.

Omi, sneaky day trip sounds very tempting

Birds, sounds like a lovely day!

Have to go pick up ds2 now & haven't done anything I should have!

Ooh, I shall email and we can arrange it!

Glad you enjoyed it Birds. My DC are
Desperate to return. It really is ace.

I am writing KISSING. It is fun.

Kisses are the best thing ever to write. All toe-curly.

I'm BACK.

Will my children cope? Who knows. School run now takes 3 hrs total though, bastard not being able to drive.

Next step: learn to drive (although cars are feckin expense to run )

And welcome back, TeWi! Are you all settled in? Is it wonderful havong the space? Has anyone drawn/peed/vomited on stuff yet? How are your gorgeous bairns? And lovely dh? And YOU?

3 fucking hours! <Faints>

I know! DD does walk really slow, it's only 4/5 miles for me.

We're all good, house is wonderful all nerves forgotten. DS doesn't sleep and keeps falling over things, DD has wee'd in most rooms and drawn on the walls at her friend's house(!) Was totally mortified, other mum was blase. Read a bunch of books because I couldn't get online.

All normal in the house of Weas!

Omi, so pleased to see DS was happy at school.

And is it a don't bother buying the cv?

I didn't really get back into it, TeWi. But I prefer to read a book all at one sitting and I haven't had time or the inclination with CV TBH. I might save it until we next visit SIL who lives in the land of no wifi.

Glad to hear the move is a happy one :-)

<delurks> it's probably not delurking after the tenth time but whatevs

Thank you penguin and others for reccing A Cure For Boredom, it got me onto Sherlock/John (Johnlock?) in a massive way... and Emma Grant's tumblr is full of porn great recs, just finished Performance in a Leading Role which you've probably read but oh my god it was fecking brilliant. I die. <all the feels>

School is getting shitter and shitter, Omi. Today I was observed with no notice. Am fucking livid. Think I may take all the shit they throw, then sue the bastards of constructive dismissal or whatever fuck its called.

On the other hand, those of you on the sekrit place will have seen my new sekrit endeavour... Let them eat cake!

Team that is really crappy. I have no advice, but I think detaching from it as much as possible is probably the best way.

And yay for new endeavour!

Is that career fair fic Princess Thief pretty good then? It's quite long and it's the only one I haven't read yet.

Dp read one of my attempts at a fic yesterday, and spent large parts of today telling me that he is not gay and he doesn't fancy men

Was this an observation by management? Are they even allowed to do that? Professional courtesy would suggest that it shouldn't happen.

We can have "drive-by" inspections (by DES inspectors), but they are largely meaningless and an exercise in box-ticking.

Professional courtesy has gone out the window.
It was an LA consultant, who assumed I knew she was coming.

Right, I'm not talking about it anymore. I'm googling for Robporn instead.

Hubba hubba!

In my next life, I wanna be a paper coffee cup

<issues new gussets to all TSA>

Pppssssssssss. Omi! Day trip on a FRIDAY! Pleeaaassseee?! I wanna come too!

Hugz all round,

"How you doing?"

<Snatches new gusset >

I hate to add to your stress, Team, but his hair looks dirty (and not in a good way) in that first picture.

The others, however, are all acceptable

Right, bed. Goodnight, lovelies.

I like it when they're a bit dirty, Never.

I think I might book HP tickets as a Christmas gift for the DC. We could go and see wizards instead of The Big FC.

Team. My feeling is get the fuck out, and find somewhere else to be happy. Athough I am a teensy bit jaded about teaching myself.

Yay! For new ventures though. When I did teacher training, a million years ago, we all used to chat obsessively about our exit plans. I think we are all out of teaching now....

I have spent the last hour reading about autism, and now my brain hearts. But it was all very interesting.

Dream, do you mean HP studio tour, or just a meet up? If the first, I will look at Friday dates, I'll see what I can find.

Right, now to click on all Team's links before I go to sleep. Sweet dreams, y'all.

Heart = hurt. Sigh.

And I haven't read that one either, birds, despite Sara Holmes reccing it. It looked detail-heavy and is AU, but the banter is supposed to be good.

Talking of banter, any of you lot read the hairdressing fic yet? It's a gem.

Oh, and GOOD WORK on the Robporning, Team <melts in a puddle of goo>

I adored the Princess Thief, one of the best I've read in ages. The hairdressing one was fun but not as much fun as French accent Draco

Team, sounds arse. And yes, it's called constructive dismissal.

Right, off to read new Sherlock fic.

Cheese strings are fine for breakfast, right? Am hearting that fic hard so far.

Am going to start Princess Thief, then. Sounds ace.

I think my day started at 3 am when I poked ds3 in the eye when trying to feed him. It all went downhill from there really. The whole house was awake at one point, with ds2 saying "he's woken up daddy, and he's woken up mummy, and he's woken up me, and he's woken up-- " and me and dp going SHUT UP!
I would still be in bed pretending I will get back to sleep, only I have to go to work, and take grumpy sleep deprived children with me...

Hairdressing fic? Link, please?

I didn't finish Princess Thief. I read the first third or so and got bored. Too OOC, maybe? I'm not sure, but I didn't like it much.

Team, definitely get out when/if you can. Leaving stress at work behind has been the best thing I've done in years, can't recommend it enough.

Oh and p.s. Omi only likes that fic because she betaed it I am really glad you liked it, Penguin

P.P.s I mean the hair one, not the princess one obviously! Oh dear I was going for subtlety, not too successful LOL

I've started Princess Thief and enjoying it so far. Haven't read hairdressing one, but it's next on my list.

Tewi, yay for having moved in, though horrified at the thought of a 3 hr school run!

Team, that just sucks. New venture looks good, hope that takes off for you & you can stick 2 fingers up at the school.

Finished Princess Thief, it's ok

Really enjoyed the hairdressing one, especially the shaving scene . And I loved the concept of what Draco was trying to do. I had a bit of trouble following the double dealings in the Princess Thief (but then I always struggle with complex stories. Couldn't be doing with the Bourne books/movies and I only watch James Bond because of Daniel Craig) but Princess Thief was plotty and pacy. I also thought the bounty hunter/conman career progression was very plausible.

I should be working, but I'm not in the mood.

Omi, HP tour on a Friday would,d be fantastic... otherwise a meet would be good too!

I have to leave my bed now, time to get ds2

Another of birds's prompts has posted! It is art AND fic, and much fun: It's Delightful, It's Delcious, Its De-lovely.