So I saw dds birth mum yesterday.

(121 Posts)
Mama1980 Sun 25-Aug-13 20:41:49

She asked to see me, all very official through social services and we met at a contact centre with social worker present. I hadn't seen her in 6 years. Court ordered no contact with either me or dd and she never contested that.
Dd was fine with it we had a long talk, she will never have contact with her bm again but given the circumstances was fine with me seeing her. I would never have agreed if she wasn't.
Oh my heart just broke for the girl who was once my friend, she looks awful, she's my age but looks 50 and her eyes are just dead. she was once my friend and we grew up together confusedi held her the day she found out she was pregnant with dd and she had such plans confusedI had a urge to just wrap my arms around her and cry but the other half of me wanted to scream at her for what she did and allowed to happen to my beautiful girl.
She said she wanted to see me to ask me to take the baby but when I asked why she just shrugged her shoulders. Words just started coming out of my mouth then, that I would help her, pay for rehab, get free, get clean, find her somewhere to stay words I've said a thousand times before. Why? Why?! Why did I stupidly hold out I don't know hope?! I'm so angry with myself.
But all she wants is for me to agree she'll have no contact she offered to sign her baby away like cheque. confusedThe social worker then started talking about not pressuring me that this was not what this was about it was about making the best decision and other things I didn't really hear.
I left and threw up. Not once did she ask about dd.
I came home to find my girl playing with ds1 and 2 laughing. Literally I was greeted by laughter as I came through the door.
I just needed to write that down sorry.

IJustNeedANap Sun 25-Aug-13 20:44:08

Sorry I don't know what to say but didn't want to read and run. It sounds like you've done an amazing thing for your DD and she is very lucky to have you as her mum! I hope you can move on from this in your own head and enjoy your DCS thanks

rootypig Sun 25-Aug-13 20:45:04

Oh mama. I don't know what to say, life is full of such dark and light. Coming home to three happy children sounds wonderful. DD is lucky to have you.

RandomMess Sun 25-Aug-13 20:46:38

sad flowers

Mama1980 Tue 27-Aug-13 07:40:39

Thanks for replying x

FourLittleDudes Tue 27-Aug-13 07:55:43

I don't know what to say, but I couldn't read and not say something, even if I have nothing helpful to say.

Jaynebxl Tue 27-Aug-13 07:56:53

How hard for you :-( but I agree, it sounds like you have done an amazing job. So did I read right and she is preg again? Or have I misunderstood?

Mama1980 Tue 27-Aug-13 08:06:52

Yes Jayne she is pregnant again. I am in the process of deciding whether or not I would consider taking the baby under a sgo initially.

FourGates Tue 27-Aug-13 08:16:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oh my goodness sad and you have three dc already? What are your instincts telling you?

Amiee Tue 27-Aug-13 08:23:31

The storey of how your family has come to be is tragic yet wonderful and it seems not yet finished.
What ever you decide I'm sure will it will be difficult so 'hugs'.

niffernaffer Tue 27-Aug-13 08:29:52

And what happens the next time she falls pregnant? You are under no obligation to her. So hard on you.

Thinking of you.

Mama1980 Tue 27-Aug-13 09:45:53

Yes I have 3 dc my dd 15 ds1 5 and my youngest ds who was born December last year.
Thanks for replying its one of those where there's nothing really too say confused

peacefuleasyfeeling Tue 27-Aug-13 10:07:14

Dear Mama, what an amazing thing you did for your DD. I am so moved. These are the life changing, life saving decisions which some people have to make, for which we should all be grateful. Those of us whose lives are not touched by such tragedies are so lucky; it could easily be anyone of us. I am very sorry you now find yourself in what I imagine must feel like a difficult spot. I wish you all the clarity of mind and courage you will no doubt need in order to make this decision. And wow again for being a wonderful mum to your DD.

So has she avoided getting pregnant for 15 years? I think in that case I would be more inclined to consider it (though god knows you have your hands full). Does that sound odd? Maybe it seems less likely that she would have several more dc and assume you would take them. I don't know. Does your dd know she's pregnant?

Coconutty Tue 27-Aug-13 10:37:43

You sound lovely OP, what a hard choice you have to make now. She must know that you have taken very good care of your DD for her to ask you to take her new baby.

I would say to you to be very careful not to take on too much - you already have 3 children.

Devora Tue 27-Aug-13 13:25:40

Huge sympathies to you, Mama. I've just had to take the hard decision on whether to adopt my dd's half-sibling. It's really tough.

My feelings towards my dd's birth parents are complex. I can't begin to imagine how complicated it gets when they were once your friend.

SunnyIntervals Tue 27-Aug-13 13:36:09

I'm sending you huge hugs - no ideas, but I am in awe of your strength. It must be so hard to think of what to do for the best.

LaVitaBellissima Tue 27-Aug-13 13:47:58

Wow, that must be a lot to process, seeing someone you were once close to at such a low ebb. Drugs really do ruin lives, I assume she is still taking them whilst pregnant, wouldn't this effect the new baby? Future health implications etc.

You sound like a lovely person, what does your partner think? thanks

spanky2 Tue 27-Aug-13 14:00:55

I have heard of this before . The adoptive family ended up with 5adopted dc from the same parents . They had to decline the last 2 . sad A dreadful situation . I would end up adopting the sibling because I am soft .

Jaynebxl Tue 27-Aug-13 19:38:58

How are you feeling now OP? Thinking of you.

Bananaketchup Wed 28-Aug-13 07:11:31

Mama thinking of you, I've nothing helpful to say just I am thinking about you

lunar1 Wed 28-Aug-13 08:42:25

I can't imagine how hard this is for you, whatever you decide to do is your choice. You have to do what's best for your family.

Mama1980 Wed 28-Aug-13 09:47:41

Thanks everyone, i really appreciate the thoughts. i guess even though ss approached me about this a few months ago I was just blind sighted by how I felt seeing her again. We have moved so far past everything in the last few years it was a shock. I just wished for a moment that things could be different. confused
Getting a sgo for dd was so so difficult I was single and only 26 (I was originally her godmother, me and her bm are distantly related so I and always been in her life) I fought like hell i became one of those women who just kept yelling so loud they had to take notice of me. I did it because I knew it was best for my dd no way on earth was I abandoning her. But this is different I'm already assessed etc. they say the sgo with a view to later adoption would be relatively simple (in theory though as anyone with ss experience knows its never simple) given my position and circumstances I was shocked they would even consider me but apparently so. The cynical part of me thinks its partly because they know money is not a issue nor is space, I would be the easy option.
I just want what's best for this baby and my dd of course. She knows and knows what she wants but also understands the issues all too well. confused

spanky2 Wed 28-Aug-13 18:44:44

Also it would be good to have siblings stay together , if you are able of course .

belatedmaybe Wed 28-Aug-13 20:13:22

They will also know what an amazing life you have given your dd. I cannot imagine the number of thoughts going around your head right now and don't want to add to them but couldn't read without offering a token of support. It seems clear that, whatever you decide, you will decide it for the best reasons.

Jaynebxl Wed 28-Aug-13 21:12:10

Wow thanks for sharing your story. I really wish you well whatever you decide to do.

LaVitaBellissima Wed 28-Aug-13 21:31:29

What is your DD's opinion? And what is your gut reaction?

DelayedActionMouseMaker Wed 28-Aug-13 21:36:17

From your dd and this baby's position I would say that doing this gives them birth family to have by one another's side, which must be a big thing for both of them. But you also have to consider your own feelings about whether a family of 4 children's is really what you want?

Mama1980 Mon 02-Sep-13 14:38:41

Thank you for all the support. It's much appreciated. I had a ss meeting today where I have agreed to take the baby and things will now be moving forward. Maybe I'm crazy my youngest isn't 1 yet but it feels the right decision.

LaVitaBellissima Mon 02-Sep-13 14:47:10

Good for you Mama wishing you the best thanks

lunar1 Mon 02-Sep-13 14:50:06

Congratulations on expanding your family, you are certainly going to be busy when the little one arrives!

bootsycollins Mon 02-Sep-13 14:59:56

Wishing you all the best Mama. Your family's story is inspirational. Has the bm been dependant on drugs throughout her pregnancy?

wow Mama1980. Wish you the best.

Slainte Mon 02-Sep-13 15:11:32

Wow, you're an inspiration to us all. Good luck to you and your family.

MoreThanWords Mon 02-Sep-13 15:12:15

Wishing you strength and patience for the next few years months. I have one child with me under an sgo and last year almost had to make a similar decision (until nature decided otherwise).

Is the baby likely to be born substance-dependent? Make sure you get every possibility catered for in your sgo in terms of future support.

How does the 15yo feel about a half? sibling arriving, in relation to how she feels towards her birth mother?

You are making a life changing decision for the new baby - and I applaud you for it x

LovePotatoes Mon 02-Sep-13 15:17:09

Hello Mama. I too want to applaud you for what you are doing! You are an inspiration. The new addition to your family will be very fortunate to have you as their Mum.
I hope the birth mother gets better asap.

Buswanker Mon 02-Sep-13 15:19:22

What a brave and truly amazing decision you made, one more child laughing and playing when you come home.
All the best x

VileWoman Mon 02-Sep-13 16:32:25

I just wanted to say you are amazing. A friend of my MIL adopted four siblings and they have become amazing people, comes of having a fab Mum. And as my cousin is a foster parent I have a small idea of what you will have to go through. Your friend is so lucky to have you to pick up the pieces of her life.

SunnyIntervals Mon 02-Sep-13 19:40:23

[thanks[ for you. What an amazing mother you are smile

SunnyIntervals Mon 02-Sep-13 19:40:32


Jaynebxl Mon 02-Sep-13 22:26:04

Wow! Well done you. Hope it all goes well.

Devora Mon 02-Sep-13 22:46:37

thanks for you, Mama

Lilka Mon 02-Sep-13 23:06:07

Wonderful, I hope your new DC will bring you more joy than you can express in words (my DS who was a sibling placement certainly does me) smile flowers

Charlottehere Mon 02-Sep-13 23:17:27

You are amazing. Really....I'm in awe. Good luck.

Charlottehere Mon 02-Sep-13 23:17:57


flossymuldoon Tue 03-Sep-13 16:59:53

Oh my goodness. Congrats. You are amazing!!!

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 08:56:08

Thanks everyone, appreciate the good wishes smile
The baby may or not be substance dependent no one is sure of the truth of what bm says right now. Ss say to prepare both ways. Baby is due in December.

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 09:02:56

Goodness mama!
You are so brave to take this on after everything you have been through!
I hope this woman is grateful and realises how much you have done and will continue to do for her!

SunnyIntervals Wed 04-Sep-13 09:24:58

Mama, did you see earthmotherimnot's old thread? I am sure this little one will not be as severely dependent as the baby she cared for (she then successfully met all milestones), but might be worth a skim?

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 09:55:02

Mumof3 thanks, I'm not brave though we just all try to do the best we can don't we. I'm sure she is not grateful, I don't think there's enough of the girl I knew a long time ago left to be. But I feel this is right.
Sunny- yes I have seen earthmotherimnot s old thread thanks. Such tragic news this morning she sounds as if she was amazing.

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 10:11:18

Mama I think you are brave!

I was on the due April thread with you (num3onway) and for all you have been through in the past year alone I think you are quite amazing!

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 14:35:36

Mumof3- I didn't recognise your name change, smile I'm struggling to keep up with the post natal thread now. Thanks for the kind words, much appreciated thanks

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 14:36:31

I'm not surprised you sound incredibly busy!

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 14:52:21

Yep grin but its a lot of fun! grinHow are you all doing? You must have your hands full too.

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 14:57:21

Oh yes we are always busy!

Dd is now 5 months, how old is Alex now? He will be one when you take on the new baby? That could be fun!

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 15:05:14

Alex is nearly 9 months now, unbelievable isn't it?! grin
Yep it's gonna be fun alright I keep alternating between thinking I'm doing the right thing worrying I'm crazy. But I knew this was a possibility when I took in dd and I really feel it is the right thing.

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 15:19:46

I suppose your dd being older means you have a good helper anyway!
How is Alex doing? We are still just at the rolling stage! Both older dc sat unaided at 5 months and crawled at 6 but I don't think little one will!

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 15:44:37

Alex is sitting unaided I have continued with the exercises the physio gave me when he first came home which he loves, they were really worried about his muscle tone at first but not anymore he still has the same strong little grip he kept pulling the nicu tubes out with! Throwing things is his new favourite too! grin its strange ds1 born less prem had many more issues, he didnt sit until he was well over a year, guess it just shows how individual all children are. He has had a few problems with a gut imbalance which was scary for a while but it's all sorted now and he's well on the way to weaning properly with the care of the preemie nutritionist. He is also having regular check ups but all his tests have come back clear so far he looks the picture of health, he's just small still. He still in 0-3 month stuff mostly. The balance between his actual age and corrected is crazy though something's he can do so easy others not t all its all muddled. One thing he hates is sleep though, we're still on 2 hourly breast feeds pretty much 24/7 which is the routine he got into in the nicu, I'm hoping that will settle down soonish grin
Have you started weaning yet?

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 15:50:09

Oh gosh 0-3 how cute! Dds 3-6 stuff in looking pretty tight now lol and I noticed this mornings her leggings are getting too short. Good job I already bought full 6-9 wardrobe lol

We started baby rice a couple of weeks ago and she loves it bless her! Have started to give a little porridge too.

She is ff and takes about 30-35 oz a day as well as a little baby rice and cereal, her appetite seems to have increased since introducing the baby rice

I know a little one who was 10 weeks prem he's now nearly one, he can sit unaided and bum shuffle but still unable to roll over bless him

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 16:08:48

Lol I think dd had Alex's first year of clothes bought within a week of him coming home grin she cannot wait for him to be able to wear half of it!
Rolling over Alex isn't great at either, he tends to do a weird sideways wiggle instead. He is hitting all the milestones just not in order grin

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 16:21:41

As long as he gets there the order doesn't matter really does it!
Dd also has half a 9-12 wardrobe lol!
Older dc are both boys so buying girls things is great for me!

Do you know if the new baby is a boy or girl?

Mama1980 Wed 04-Sep-13 16:39:16

No grin it's is confusing though I never know what to expect him to do next.
No not yet as I didn't formally agree until this week all medical information was unnecessary. Once the initial paperwork is sorted they tell me ill get more details and specifics as to how practically things will work. Bm says she wants and will have no contact or anything confused but we'll wait and see, whatever is best for this baby.

Mumof3xx Wed 04-Sep-13 16:40:55

Hopefully she wont have any more and expect you to take them!

bext Tue 10-Sep-13 04:01:46

Wow, Mama, you are amazing. I was also on the April 2013 thread with you and just wanted to say good luck with the new baby and I'm so pleased Alex is doing so well. You've done amazingly with your brood, they must all be so proud of their mama. xx

Mama1980 Mon 16-Sep-13 12:59:36

Well meeting with ss went well this morning I took my solicitor who helped me clarify a few points.
dd s birth mum wants no contact at all, I am aware she has 6 weeks to change her mind but its not likely. So ss are planning to place the baby with me as soon as possible after birth, things being much faster as we are (distantly) related. This feels so surreal....

Jaynebxl Mon 16-Sep-13 14:31:44

When is the baby due?

Mama1980 Mon 16-Sep-13 15:53:18

December around the 15th a couple of days after my ds2 s first birthday.

Mama1980 Thu 14-Nov-13 08:41:54

Hi just wanted to update. Dd s birth mum had a baby girl last night, she's small and in nicu, she will almost certainly have to go through withdrawal. Ss called me last night and I've spoken to the hospital who are aware of the situation. I'm going to the hospital later this morning. Thanks again for all the advice and support.

volvocowgirl Thu 14-Nov-13 09:24:33

Good luck with everything, Mama. Hope she's okay. You're doing a wonderful thing. Hope everything goes well for you and your family.

LoreleisSecret Thu 14-Nov-13 09:32:33

Congratulations Mama on the arrival of your new DD.
Best wishes and prayers sent your way xx

Devora Thu 14-Nov-13 10:49:02

Welcome to your lovely new dd, Mama. I'm so sorry she will have to go through withdrawal - thank goodness you are there to help her through.

I will be thinking of you both x

Catchhimatwhat Thu 14-Nov-13 11:19:28

Good luck meeting her. smile

Kewcumber Thu 14-Nov-13 11:46:05

Good luck Mama

Matildathecat Thu 14-Nov-13 14:20:11

Just read all this. You are amazing. I wish you all the very best.

Has anyone discussed birth mum getting long term contraception? She can't expect you to just keep taking her babies. Sounds like she got plenty of child bearing years ahead.

Love to all your little ones.

TinyTear Thu 14-Nov-13 14:33:54

Good luck, will you be able to breastfeed /pump for her? it would be a lovely bonding experience.

lalalonglegs Thu 14-Nov-13 14:45:52

Wow mama, I've just come across this thread. I hope everything goes well for you, I take my hat off to you, you sound like an amazing mum and a lovely person.

Good luck with your (not-so) little brood smile.

Mama1980 Fri 15-Nov-13 08:37:05

Just updating briefly thanks for all the good wishes. I was at the hospital yesterday for ages she is tiny less than 5lbs but doing well the drs say. She's going to be in for 2 weeks at least.
I'm going back In later today. I actually hadn't thought of breast feeding, I am still feeding my youngest, and the dr mentioned it yesterday we are going to discuss further, maybe expressing at least, as she will be coming home with me. (Everything is easier from a legal point of view as we are distantly related).

TinyTear Fri 15-Nov-13 08:41:32

it was you mentioning up-thread you were still bf your youngest that made me think of it.

of course milk for a toddler is different to for a newborn, but maybe ask a lactation consultant or check the kellymom website.

glad she is doing well

You are amazing flowers good luck to you and your little bean, hope she does very well, please keep up updated x

RalphGnu Fri 15-Nov-13 09:10:56

This thread has me in tears.

Thank god there are people like you in the world x

Mama1980 Sat 16-Nov-13 08:03:34

Hi thanks for the good wishes. Just updating as promised, I spent a lot of time at the hospital yesterday she is struggling to feed which isn't good given her low birth weight but she is doing ok. I got to hold her for a bit and she seemed to calm when I did, she is just so beautiful.

neffi Sat 16-Nov-13 08:14:53

What a very special person you are. I hope the baby will be OK.

Mumof3xx Sat 16-Nov-13 08:21:48

Lovely to see an update from you mama and congrats on the new arrival
What you are doing is amazing especially given all the challenges you have already been through
How is Alex btw?

ChippingInLovesAutumn Sat 16-Nov-13 08:34:17

Mama I missed your thread originally. I hope your beautiful DD2 gets strong quickly & that there hasn't been any long term damage done by whatever the mother took/did while pregnant sad It would be fantastic for her if you could bf.

How is DD 1 doing with all of this?

How are you? It is very sad that your friend isn't in a place to accept the amazing help you offered her, for her sake and both of her DD's (and you and her family etc of course), but you can't make her 'be ready'.

duchesse Sat 16-Nov-13 08:40:24

Golly, just read your entire thread. What a wonderful thing to do, both for this little baby and your older DD. I hope the little one doesn't turn out to have issues and that it's relatively plain sailing with her.

What an incredible person you are Mama.

I started crying when you mentioned breast feeding your new DD, that must be a huge bonus for her if it works out. I really really hope the next few weeks go well for you and your amazing family.

ToucanBlack Sat 16-Nov-13 10:10:01

OP you are amazing! I wish you and your family the best of luck. thanks

Branleuse Sat 16-Nov-13 10:28:53

lots of love and strength to you xxx

FannyFifer Sat 16-Nov-13 10:40:24

What an amazing woman you are.
Best wishes to you, your new daughter and your beautiful family.

rednellie Sat 16-Nov-13 10:52:06

Just wanted to wish you well. You're obviously no stranger to the NICU, and I hope dd2 is gaining weight.

If you need any help with tandem feeding I can offer what little I know from having twins.

Good luck with it all, you sound an amazing woman. How is dd1 feeling?

Congratulations on the birth of your new DD! Thinking of you and all of your growing family.

kellestar Sun 17-Nov-13 17:07:21

Mama congratulations! I hope you and your family are well and your new DD will be home with you soon.

If you want any girls stuff give me a shout, B was 5lb and was a December baby so we have winter small baby and first size. Happy to post on to you free.

Good luck!

TeaAndSconesTwice Sun 17-Nov-13 17:16:24

Wow you are amazing muma, congratulations smile

MikeTheShite Sun 17-Nov-13 17:20:50

mama you are one hell of a lady, I just wanted to say congratulations on your new dd x

Have been thinking of your family all weekend, hope everything is going very well. I am so envy at the idea of a cuddly newborn though!

Mama1980 Mon 18-Nov-13 08:45:09

Thanks everyone. Baby was sedated last night as she was in distress yesterday and they plan to keep her that way and run tests today. Hopefully she will be stronger when she 'wakes' and has and some fluids and food in her. I will get some cuddles later as well. Her bm discharged herself AMA yesterday hmm.

Mumof3 - Alex is doing great, he's my little super star. I can't believe he will be a year soon. He is crawling now and everywhere all the time I can't keep up grin he is still tiny (in 3-6 month clothes) but other than that you would never guess how prem he was.
He is such a little personality, loves to giggle, everyone comments on it, I bought a very expensive pushchair that I could push easily with my crutches etc, and he hates it, refuses to even think of lying in it- my boy knows his own mind! I try to remember such strength is a good thing lol smile

AfricanExport Mon 18-Nov-13 08:55:41

Respect! You are awesome. I wish you all the happiness in the world. smile

EasyCompadre Mon 18-Nov-13 09:02:31

Mama, you are amazing! I'm speechless after reading this thread, but your DDs will grow feeling so special that you were there for them when they most needed someone, and you changed the course of their lives in unbelievable ways. What a woman!!
I hope baby DD is stronger an more settled when she wakes, you'll all be I my thoughts. Has older DD seen the new baby yet?

KalevalaForMePlease Mon 18-Nov-13 09:07:52

What an amazing thread. You are an inspiration, Mamma, I have so much admiration for you. All the best to you and your lovely family. thanks

KoalaFace Mon 18-Nov-13 09:32:47

Just wanted to tell you how amazing you and your family are. I'm in awe.

Sending lots of positive thoughts to you all, especially your new baby girl.

mouseymummy Mon 18-Nov-13 09:46:31

Mama, I'm amazed at your strength and you are an amazing mother. I have nothing but respect and awe for you.

Has your dd met the new arrival yet?

IAlwaysThought Mon 18-Nov-13 09:49:58

Wow, what an amazing woman you are.
I hope everything works out. I wish you and your family the very best.
thanks brew (you will be needing a lot of these)

Mama1980 Tue 19-Nov-13 18:28:40

Hi thanks for all the good wishes, much appreciated. thanks
Baby girl is doing well they are treating her with the minimum sedation necessary and hope to wean her off it over the next few days. She is struggling to feed so they dropped a ng tube as she's so tiny but she is tolerating milk well and seems stronger with some food and fluids in her.
Dd has met her but only briefly she's coping well, we sat and had a long talk last night, she accused me of worrying too much about her grin and fussing too much so I think she's doing fine, For so many years she was too terrified to even answer me back out of sheer fear - now she's telling me to 'give it a rest mum!' In her best 16 year old voice - makes me unbelievably happy and proud of her grin

jonicomelately Tue 19-Nov-13 18:47:23

This thread has made me so happy. What a great family. I really hope you have an amazing Christmas with your dc.

Lovethesea Tue 19-Nov-13 20:15:57

Glad your new DD is here and praying she gets stronger quickly so you can all be home together.

peppapigmustdie Tue 19-Nov-13 20:22:27

Thank God for people like you, your dc's are so lucky to have you.

So happy to read your update. Best wishes to all flowers

Devora Wed 20-Nov-13 14:31:01

What a wonderful update! All best to you and your lovely kids, Mama.

fruitloop84 Wed 20-Nov-13 14:32:48

Wow you are amazing. good luck to you, your new dd and the rest of your family

holycowwhatnow Wed 20-Nov-13 18:25:26

O Mama, you have a very special family. Glad to hear that dd2 is doing well. The poor little scrap, what a tough start but great that she'll go straight home with her mama. Hats off to you, you're a special person.

Dysgu Wed 20-Nov-13 18:47:37

So glad to see that she is making good progress already. Can't imagine how things are going to be in your home once you get her home but is all sounds very exciting; I hope she copes well with everything she has to go through and continues to do well.
She is clearly joining a family of determined, loving people and you especially are awesome. Good luck to you all x

georgedawes Sat 23-Nov-13 16:20:10

What an amazing person you are. Hope she is continuing to do well smile

Mama1980 Wed 27-Nov-13 09:24:01

Thanks everyone thanks baby girl is doing well and when she was passed back to me yesterday she stopped crying which was a amazing feeling.

ThenSheSaid Wed 27-Nov-13 16:51:05

Glad to hear its going well. thanks

goshhhhhh Wed 27-Nov-13 17:01:50

You sound amazing & this is really hard. I think given that you have 3 dcs already this must be a family decision - which I am sure you are already thinking. I am wondering if this baby is likely to have any complications & how this would impact in you all. Sorry if this sounds hard & is meant as a question just to consider. Hope you have someone objective to talk to in real life.

goshhhhhh Wed 27-Nov-13 17:44:07

Sorry should clearly read all of the thread! So glad it has worked out for you. I hope you are very happy x

Hello, was thinking of you and wondering how you and the dkids were doing?

WaitMonkey Thu 23-Jan-14 18:07:33

Just read this thread. Hope you and your family are doing well op. thanks

HeatherCatherine82 Sun 02-Feb-14 17:58:45

Wow! You did such a beautiful thing xx

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