My mum had lunch today with an old friend who knows me quite well. For anyone who doesn't know DS was adopted at 11 months from a Ruusian speaking area of Kazakhstan.

He is nearly three now.

She asked after us both then said "how is Kewcumbers DS? Can he speak English?"

Not "can he talk yet" or "is his speech delayed" (I don't think such things occured to her) - she genuinely seemed to think that when he started talking he would speaking Russian! TWo years after he last heard any! Do people really think this - am I being naive at thinking its a ridiculous question?!

It is a ridiculous question. Maaaaan! - that woman is thick!

Crikey- very amusing thing to think.

am glad its not just me then - my jaw dropped. Then thought maybe I'm too close to it and perhaps it was a reasonable thing to think!

oh Kewc, it never ceases to amaze me the depths of ignorance that some people can sink to! OTOH, she probably thought she was doing really well to remember that he wasn't an English boy to start with! <sigh>

no its a v thick question. utterly bizarre.
and i thought my brain was mush...

in fact she would probably have had a heart attack if she met him because he has a very cute BBC accent! Unless he's saying "Hebby Cobble"

(helicopter)

people do think strange things though - I remember being in a restaurant in France once and there was a mynah bird in a cage there who said "Bonjour!" and I remember thinking "Wow! How clever is that bird, it can speak French!!"

bizarre indeed, kew.....
still suffering from insomnia then?
(you, that is, not the english-speaking ds)

Its a ridiculous question but it just shows how ridiculous some people are!

god steppie - so tires I could drop but just can;t switch off!

We're milling around at home in teh morning to recharge if you want a coffee...

what a pain..
you're on!
will have ds1 with me if that's OK
am threatening to drag him into london shopping for lights
so a caffeine fix first would be fab (for me) and he'd love to see your ds
what time does kewcumber towers open for cawfeeeee?

any time you like if you're prepared for the mess! We're generally up and about by 8am. Would be nice to see DS1 on his own for a change.

the only mess i notice is a messy mind, so no need to fret (pet)
when you say it'll be nice to see ds1 by himself, you do realise he'll have his adult ligger in tow, too?

say about 9.45-10ish?

time fine but I guess you're insisting on coming too then?

'fraid so....

That's so funny. Did she pull herself together and realise that it was a completely silly question and feel a bit of a fool? I'm sure I've had equally 'vacant' moments.

Well - we were talking about our recent holiday in Australia, which was in August, their winter, and we were asked "oh, so were you there for Christmas?" !!!

Actually, I've had a surprising number of comments that make me LOL. For instance I was talking with my cousin about DS shooting up and telling DS that he would be tall when he's an adult, and my cousin said "well both you and DH are tall so he probably will be". I usually wait a beat or two and then say "You do remember he was adopted and there's no genetic link, don't you?" with a quizzical look.

(OMG I thought you were talking about your DS doing drugs! )

I've had a brain fart like that before*, though. She might not have been thinking and realised later what a ridiculous question it is.

*I asked my husband's twin sister when her birthday is.

Now that you mention it I see that it is shockingly badly phrased. Obviously I meant shooting up like a bamboo/sunflower/other lovely thing that grows in spurts. Sorry. He's only 4, I'm hoping for a few more years before having to deal with any thorny drink/drug issues.

I hope so!

I think its always possible that it was just a vacant moment (and yes we've had all them) but hearing my mum - I really don't think so I think she was really thought he would start speaking Russian and would then later (at some future uinknown point ) start learning English. Maybe I should enrole him an "English as a foreign language" course

We should start a "stupid questions I have asked" thread. The first time I saw the traffic light sculpture by Canary Wharf I asked my brother how he know when it was his turn to go. He answered in a scathing tone "It's a sculpture on a roundabout, I go when there's a gap in the traffic".

PMSL at this.
DH ended himself.

I once was looking at a list of the worlds largest companies in the Financial times (bear in mind here that I am a financedirector - makes the comment about a zillion times denser)

Top company was a Japanese one I hadn;t heard of so looked under "Category" to see what they did = Umbrella. "How odd " I said ALOUD - the worlds biggest company makes unbrellas.

Someone very kindly explained it meant covering a multitude of industries rather than a ginormous umbrella manufacturer to the universe whilst the rest of my colleagues lay on the floor wetting themselves and doing deep-breathing exercises to control themselves.

kind of really doesn't surprise me...had some recently ask me if I was sure that I really was german....and not maybe from newzealand/australia, south africa or netherlands instead...because my accent wasn't german...reassure her I was sure of where I came from...person percepered, asking me then, but maybe in the past, etc.......yup that rally would have made a lot of difference., because, of course language is passed down by genes....erm....lol....not...

however, I do think that, even in earlist childhood we will learn language to some extent, and presumably birht parents spoke in thei mothertongue, your child may well find they remember some words or others in the future....but only maybe...
of course....
still, when a child actually learns language, then I would think they learn the language they actually hear at the time...iykwim....

Ohhh, your's is much more embarassing than mine. Although I should perhaps mention that I had been around the roundabout twice, once when I was driving, before I asked my question.

(Please ignore the errant apostrophe. )

People are riduculous sometimes. My (white) friend adopted a little girl from swazi and was once asked "Is her father black?"

LOL that is really funny
I dated a guy at University who had never ever eaten a doughnut... because he doesn’t like nuts Honest to God, he really thought they had nuts in them. We didn’t date for long....

What I can't believe is that it has been nearly 2 years since you adopted your DS. That time has sped by.

This happens a lot. My dad's GF is about to become a grandmother to a little girl adopted from Thailand. A baby. The GF is learning Thai not to make sure that the baby keeps in touch with her culture but so that she'll understand her grandma when she talks. My dad had to gently explain that a child brought up by English speakers will more than likely speak English. Dearie me.

I am a very intelligent person.

My house number is 96.

I went into a hardware shop a few months ago to buy numbers for our front door and asked for a 9 and a 6. (you can start laughing here if you want, everyone I've told so far has...)

Shop assistant: We haven't got any 9s, we've got plenty of 6s

Me: That's no good to me, I need a 9 and a 6.

SA: Why don't you just get two 6s?

Me: Yes well if I lived at No 66 I would!

Pause

Me: Er..I see what you mean

er well durr very thick lol

lol

Kewcumber - shockingly dim thing for your friend to say, but then some people are and some people do.

I remember reading your blogs from Kazakhstan at the time and just had a sneak look on your profile. Your ds is gorgeous. I love the latest photo: what a sweetie.

I was adopted at age 5 months & I am mixed race- my mum was often stopped and asked if I could speak English! Helllooooooooo

So there are a LOT of thick people out there!!!

Your mother's friend does sound a little dim.

We took our dd to America when she was 17 months old at a time she was learning a lot of new words. Strangely enough she kept her English accent (we were only in the States for 10 days btw)

My mum has a stepsister and loads of people say how alike I am to my step aunt...helloooo.... we are not related in that way!

Lol, Kewcumber. Mind you, I have moments like that too .

People do ask or assume some really daft things, don't they!! Especially if things get clouding by adoption stuff. My DD was scalded at 22 months and has quite a lot of very visible scarring. She's 9 now and last summer after years of her ears being gummed with glue ear we could no longer stand the deafness, repeating ourselves and raised voices so she had grommets put in. The number of people who made ridiculous comments in which they desperately tried to make some connection between her burn injury and apparently related deafness quite baffled me. I could hardly contain my 'disbelief at your thickness' look whenever someone said to me 'Oh, so is her deafness anything to do with her scald?' Duh!!! Just so annoying that you have to keep giving the same explanation to people all the time and that everyone thinks life follows an entirely linear path...!

That should've been 'clouded' . Sorry.

bran - have just looked at the piccie of the roundabout 'art'...tee hee!!

I have actually been lucky with not too many dim adoption comments so far - lots and lots of a "what do you know about his birth parents" from virtual strangers "right because I'm really going to share that information with a casual acquaintance in M&S coffee shop before my son even has a chance to know" is of course what I don't reply ("Not much" generally suffices!).

Most people don't like to assume he is adopted in case my absent partner is asian/oriental.. however the corker in hospital was from the batty old lady in the bed opposite starting with...

"Is he your grandson?" particularly as my mum was with me at the time (lord knows how she thought I/she both were.

KC smiles sweetly "no, my son"

"ooh yes now you say that I can see the resemblance"

"no you can't you daft old bat"

My mums friend however is neither particularly old not particularly batty - just a bit dim I think...

I wonder if the friend just lost track of time? My parent's friends often think my children are much much younger than they are, indeed I do this with their children too, because I have an image in my head of them, and it hasn't grown up, although the child in question obviously has. If they were thinking of you adopting very recently still then it's not such an unreasonable thought.

When a friend of mine went to the US, he met people who asked him where he was from and he said "England". They responded with "Wow, where did you learn such good English?"

That beats your mum's dim friend I think. Duuurrrr!

nooka - I could charitably had interpreted it that way, of course. I ammore inclined however (knowing the person) that she is just being a tad vacant [vacant).

Snowleopard - you win!

I got asked three times when I was in Oklahoma what language we spoke in England...

My friend is a dog trainer and got a call from a woman who thought her dog couldn't understand her becuase the dog was a GERMAN shepherd! Truly!
Another great one was, when skiing with a friend and going up the chair lift she said "Why does the chair lift come back down, when everyone skis down?" OMG!