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FtA placement approved! If becoming when

(12 Posts)
OneMoreForExtra Mon 10-Oct-16 18:42:29

Squeeeee! Today our FtA placement was agreed, for a delicious and wonderful bundle of loveliness. After 2 years waiting for a match (and a further 2 years before that in the pre-approval system), my brain is entirely geared to thinking any this in terms of "if". Now I have to shift to "when" and it's a pretty immanent when, by the sounds of things. I'm already planning some Olympic-standard list making for kit (we have a BC but I gave a lot of baby things to the refugee appeals during the doldrums, so need to restock), and turning spare room into new baby bedroom. We're also working with SW to develop a plan for preparing our DS. I'll obviously be mainlining Ariel's FtA blog. And trying (but probably failing) to bear in mind the uncertainties, the differences, the difficulties, and the need to do one thing at a time. Any advice from those who've gone before?

luckylucky24 Mon 10-Oct-16 19:04:38

We didn't do FTA, just wanted to say congratulations.

flapjackfairy Mon 10-Oct-16 20:46:31

Yes huge congratulations. Not quite the same but we are adopting our foster child placed at 11 months but not on a fta basis so we have lived through care proceedings approval and matching and now waiting for ao. I cant wait to come out the other side !
All i can say is enjoy it all! Try not to dwell too much on legal proceedings or you will go mad! Easier said then done i have to say.
Hope all goes well for you it is so exciting .

OneMoreForExtra Mon 10-Oct-16 22:01:24

Thank you both! And I hope your AO comes soon Flapjack - I can only imagine what that feels like!

GirlsWhoWearGlasses Tue 11-Oct-16 09:27:54

Congratulations!! What a long long wait. It must be hard to believe that it's really happening.

OneMoreForExtra Tue 11-Oct-16 14:33:24

Thanks GirlsWho . Yes, I'm pinching myself...

arielmanto Tue 11-Oct-16 16:49:23

Squeee indeed! Massive congratulations, how old is LO? My advice would be to squeeze every drop of info out of existing foster carer (if there is one and LO isn't coming straight from hospital) regarding protocol. Our SW was an adoption SW and had little idea of the admin side involved with being a foster carer, even temporarily. We weren't told a lot about diary keeping, DBS checking relatives who might babysit, contact handover etc until we met original FC during intros. She taught us all the things she had had to do, and we copied. It feels excessive and a bit silly because you know (well, hope and sort of know) that they're going to move to an adoptive placement soon. But if anything hits the fan it will be you they blame for not doing it all by the book as a "foster carer", so swot up!
I'm so pleased for you, we have just had the date issued for LO to become an adoptive placement - and the foster carer payments to stop - and its next Monday, so the end is in sight! It's been three months as a foster placement. Feels like a lifetime.. And to be honest, the IF has only just really started shifting to a WHEN. keep us updated!

JustHappy3 Tue 11-Oct-16 20:26:22

Hurrah! smile

sweetchilli77 Tue 11-Oct-16 22:25:05

Congrats smile

We have just done FTA and are just applying to the courts now the fat rubber stamp. Our LO came straight from hospital. There where Few uncertainties but nothing we felt we couldn't handle.

Happy for you to PM if you would like any further info smile

OneMoreForExtra Wed 12-Oct-16 21:18:25

Thanks very much! I'm pathetically grateful that a few of you are ahead of me on this road. I'm ludicrously over-prepared for the parenting differences - in the sense of courses and reading, not in the sense of knowing what this LO will actually need, but not at all prepared for the demands of the fostering phase, so that's an excellent tip. There is a current foster carer, whose brain I will now attempt to download. And I'd never have thought of DBSing grandparents, thank you for that nugget!

How far away do you think your date could be, SweetChili? Thanks for your reassuring words.

I will be thinking of you on Monday, Ariel! How wonderful!

Thefishewife Thu 13-Oct-16 15:21:29

Give foster carer a note book that she can fill she can sit in the evening or as she's going along then And then it will have everything yu need to know

OneMoreForExtra Thu 13-Oct-16 20:40:28

I like this suggestion a lot, Fishewife. It would give me a blueprint.

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