Just that, really.
I am 42, DH is 44, and we have 1 DS (3 years). I have always wanted more than one child, and we have been ttc for nearly 2 years now, hoping for a sibling for DS. But it’s not happening, I have just had my 4th miscarriage.
I will readily admit that I am a bit all over the place at the moment, so please forgive my rambling! But I am considering my options – I don’t know if I can face continuing ttc any longer, and I feel that I don’t want to go down the fertility treatment route, as I can’t see it providing any more certainty for a successful outcome. But my heart is breaking at the thought that I might not have another child…
So, after watching an episode of the ITV adoption programme (by accident!) recently, I have started thinking, and I would really value any information or input you ladies are willing to share! I’ve talked to DH, and he would definitely be happy to explore this possibility, so that’s the first tick (of many, I guess!). I have not done any research about adoption, where to start and how it even works, but I was hoping that you might have some answers for the questions that are running riot in my head at the moment.
Firstly – our age. Am I crazy to even assume that anyone would consider letting us adopt?! Especially a baby/small toddler, which is what I would want (ideally)? We both work in good jobs (as stable as they come these days), decent incomes, house with plenty of rooms, our marriage is very good, we are healthy – but will authorities let you adopt at this age? I am very conscious that we are older parents, but this is one of the reasons I would love for DS to have siblings!
How long does the process take? Are we looking at years and years before you get approved and matched with a child? What expectations about timings are realistic? What is the shortest, what the quickest time people have experienced?
From my very quick scans through other threads on here, I get the impression that they want you to have a break between finishing ttc/fertility treatments, before you embark on the adoption process. How long would that break be? And how would you ‘prove’ that you are no longer ttc? I am not having any fertility treatments, so no problem there, but ‘natural’ ttc, do they want to see a contraceptive prescription or something like that?
I am not British, but Swiss, but have lived in the UK for nearly 17 years now – would that be an issue? DH is British.
I realise that this is all very random, but I am grateful for any information! Also, for any pointers towards websites, books etc. that I could start looking at to get more information that would help me to decide if adoption is for us.
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6 replies
JBrd · 16/05/2014 16:17
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