This is a pure angry rant, so you know, don't feel obliged to read through the whole thing if you want to stick with the positive tonight
I just fielded a wonderful phone call from someone who wanted to offer me parenting advice on DD2 because DD2 is finding home really hard because of me! (read - DD2 is triangulating and manipulating because for reasons she can't explain, it makes her feel safer and more in control)
I tried being polite, whilst being advised that I'm too hard on DD2 because (paraphrased):
- I should let her go out whenever she wants to, because kids her age need freedom
- Removing her radio (not for the first time by a long shot) was "cruel" because "she needs it". Apparently I removed it because I didn't like her music, which she has a "right to listen to". (This is bollocks. I removed it at 1AM because DD2 refused to turn it down and DS woke up and couldn't get back to sleep)
and the absolute corker:
- Kid her age shouldn't have medication, especially meds classed as antipsychotics, and I should stop her medication because it's bad and also "forcing children" (as if I force her, she's 17 not 4!!) to take "psychotic medication" is abusive
At this point I politely yet very firmly terminated the phone call, because I saw the metaphorical red sparkles of rage
Some things are not worth arguing over. I COULD have said to this certain someone
"Yes, DD2 is on strong medication. It's very sad when a child needs something like Risperidone to function well. We should ask ourselves what the root cause of this situation is, and so I have some advice/insight for you - a great method of preventing this kind of situation is not to harm your own child in such a profound way that she later needs medication to help her function. You don't like my parenting? Well then, don't fuck up your own parenting so badly that your child gets placed with me so I could do the job properly"
But I didn't. I said "goodbye X" and cut her off.