Extremely powerful story of adoption and living after abuse

[Lilka]

I truly don't think I have so moved by any news story in a long time. I ended up in tears but very very moved

This was an 8 part special report on a girl named Lauren Kavanaugh, who lives in Texas. She was given to adoptive parents (Sabrina and Bill) at birth in what was supposed to be private adoption, but after a couple of monts her birth mother changed her mind and fought for custody. She won and at 20 months old Lauren was returned to her birth mother and boyfriend, and after some months of contact with her former parents, Lauren didn't see her adoptive parents again until she was 8

In the intervening 6 years, she was very seriously abused by her birth mother and her boyfriend. She was found aged 8 in a closet, starving and close to death. It got massive media coverage, and she was known as 'The girl in the closet'. She was in hospital for weeks, during which time she got to know her former parents again, and Sabrina and Bill took her home with them when she was discharged, but instead of the happy toddler they used to know, they were now parenting a severely traumatised older child with a very poor prognosis in life.

Now Lauren is 20, she agreed to work with a journalist over a nearly 2 year period, which ended with this article series covering her life from birth to the present

It's very powerful, graphic and moving. There is no fairy story happy ending...Lauren has serious struggles in life with her emotional, physical and mental health, as anyone would expect. But all things considered, she has had so many triumphs...she is taking remedial classes, graduated from high school aged 20, has an attachment to her adoptive mum and is able to talk about what she suffered. Which is an absolute triumph.

So, if you want to read, it starts here

BUT and this is a big trigger warning Lauren and the journalist have reported in some segments very graphic details of the physical and sexual abuse and neglect she suffered, (I was surprised by the level of detail) so please please don't read it if you are triggered by abuse or just wouldn't want to read something like that

[RudolphLovesoftplay]

It's taken me all evening to read this truly horrifying story. What an absolutely heartbreaking series of events. I don't have any other words really, what a brave and inspiring young woman.

[Italiangreyhound]

I have read bits of this, it is truely appalling. I have no idea why this happens or how it can be stopped.

I am so sorry.

[Lilka]

She is very brave indeed. I hope she is able to go on and get through college, get a job and experience love, and that her adoptive mum remains in good health for many years to come

I felt once again that there was a lack of good guidance and help, for the adoptive parents. Maybe it would have happened anyway, but I felt very sad when it talked about how Lauren's parents didn't know how to discipline her and when 'time outs' (predictably) failed her mum resorted to spanking and once hit her with a belt. Mind, I did feel a bit...well, my feelings towards her adoptive mum changed after reading that. I've dealt with very challenging behaviour and have and would never lash out with a belt, even though I've been so so angry and frustrated at times.

It is very heartbreaking :( Sorry Italian I didn't mean to really upset anybody, I did wonder whether I should link it or not, but I just felt Lauren was such an amazing young woman who wanted her story told, so...

[Italiangreyhound]

Please Lilka do not apologise to me! I read some bits of it and I just felt I could not read and ignore it. It is so very sad and also makes me so angry.

[Kewcumber]

I read it all in one go. As you say its hardly glosses over the issues and yet does leave you with some hope that her life will move on with some purpose and meaning which hardly seems possible after what she went through.

I did wince repeatedly at the adoptive mothers approach to discipline and can't help wondering what might have happened with a little more of a therapeutic approach. But ultimately I think it probably right that her original adoptive parents were the right people to take her back, its just a shame that they had so little guidance.

[holycowwhatnow]

O holy god. At times like this I wish I could believe there was a hell because these people can't pay in this lifetime for what they've done. I couldn't read it all, it's too horrific. It's hard to believe anyone can be so evil.