Coping with a drop in income/Money questions

[Lilka]

I have been looking at my financial situation and wondering exactly what I'm going to do next year when DD2 turns 18. It's just hit me in a big way

Because she was an older child with significant special needs and i was/am low income, I have recieved adoption allowance for her, which was agreed before adoption to last until 18.

Also there is the DLA. I am slightly confused about what happens about DLA. At 16 we were visited and it was agreed that I remain the appointee and recieve the benefit instead of DD getting it herself. But that is all turning into PIP later this year, so I am trying to work out exactly what happens. I think I claim PIP for her as the appointee come autumn, but once she is 18....she gets the money herself? So I lose that as well

The DLA is currently standing at ~£95 a week, and the adoption allowance at ~£500 a month.

I'm looking at dropping nearly £11,000 a year
What do I do?
What do I need to give up?
Do I become eligible to claim anything else?
I need to increase my work hours for sure, absolutely need to go full time
Then what happens for DS and DD2?

DD2 is continuing to live with me for now, but I need to address what happens after 18. She won't manage fully independent living for years yet, if she does, assuming her mental health doesn't deteriorate any. She needs to live with me, or enter some kind of supported young people's housing. Having discussions with PASW about it, and what she thinks DD would need.

How do I manage on very little? I have to work this out...I need a little hand hold while I stop breathing too fast.

[Lilka]

Oh and btw...i expressed this to a friend yesterday who promptly instead of being remotely helpful, went on a long surprised-voice monologue about how I was basically being paid to adopt and parents of disabled birth children don't get adoption allowance. Ugh. So if you were just about to post to berate me for getting a few thousand in adoption allowance, just go away please. I'm not in the mood.

And btw, my allowance is very high anyway, about as high as you could possibly get for any single child (a little under 500). Amount vary wildly between LA's, who in the curret climate are doing their best to restrict who qualifies to avoid paying out.

[aladdinsane]

we have dropped income as dh has recently been made redundant, its a nasty shock
there are some good threads on here about cutting back, eating on a budget etc
If your dd is living at home then she needs to be handing over a large chunk of dla to cover her food and board
do you work at all
what about fostering or have you had enough of troubled children?

[caroldecker]

Surely she will get some income of her own, which she can use to pay you for bed and board - also DLA may be possible

[HystericalParoxysm]

I don't have any advice as I'm a few years behind you but I'm interested to see what responses you get. Could you negotiate with the LA to extend it given your DDs needs? I'm suprised that you say your allowance is high, I thought that was quite low

[Devora]

Yikes Lilka, I'm afraid I am rubbish at advising on money (or managing my own, come to that).

But your friend... where does she get off? If it makes anybody similarly-minded reading this thread feel better, it is not typical to get adoption allowances like this (I have never got a penny, and that's ok because my dd doesn't have high care needs).

[parasaurolophus]

I am certain that your allowance is much less than the cost of a residential school for a child with special needs, which means the government has saved a great deal of money by supporting you to look after your daughter. How awful of your friend to be so judgemental.

[Magslee]

Hi Lilka
It sounds like a nightmare and I am definitely not one to advise on how to manage money as it goes through my fingers like water. My benefits knowledge is a bit rusty but I'd suggest checking out the following

• a tax credits claim if you haven't already made one - if you are a single parent working over 16 hours you might be entitled to some (my claim has just come through after 5 months of chasing so it can take a while!)
  
• I think your DD may be able to claim an income benefit once she turns 18 (probably employment and support allowance?) which will be about £55 a week and maybe an enhancement because of her disabilities
  
• a claim for carer's allowance? not sure how it works but worth looking into
  
• adults can have appointees for their benefits if need them e.g. where a person has a disability that means they can't manage their money so you may want to look at applying to be her appointee after age 18 if you think that's an issue
  
• having said that - the welfare cuts mean everything is changing as I am sure you know so it may be universal credit by the time you and your daugther make your claims
  
• a specialist welfare rights advisor should be able to do a better off calculation for you to work out whether it makes sense to increase your hours and what you can claim (legal aid cuts mean welfare benefits advice is even harder to get now - apparently the system is so straight forward we can work it out for ourselves)
  
• push the LA to keep helping you even after she turns 18? not sure how realistic that is but if she was still a looked after child they would have leaving care duties to her after 18
  

Good luck and if you find the magic formula for making money go further, please let me know!

[fasparent]

Think you may need 3rd party help and advice as this can be difficult area in transition from children's service's too adult services which is total in difference your LA should advise you through Adult Disability Services. As there are two areas need too be addressed the Carer (yourself) and that of your daughter in the way of areas above the basic care element, though an individual budget plan, this can put in place with you as the administrator of her budget affairs.
Have just done one with our DS who has CP and living in his own flat budget came in at £37000 for care above the basic care element not too
say this is the norm all would be assed on their individual need at home or ells where. We had an adult social worker appointed and a personal advocate too work on this . Some LA's use consultants one is www.incontrol.org.uk . they have a list of LA's in partnership on the Webb. can ask them for help and any questions. There may be some
information on your LA's Adult disability Webb page.
Would in 1st instance get an appointed social worker too work with you.
Take your time we are still working on ours 12 months hence and have a progress meeting next week. , With advocacy.
.
Kindest regards.

[aladdinsane]

I think you need some proper advice too
I have been thinking though - once your DD is an adult if she still needs support she should get attendance allowance and you carers allowance - she needs a SW to guide her and you through it
On the financial side - I have always been a little anal about money so it came easy to me
I know all our outgoings - i have a separate account for all bills and the money goes into that each month. Since DH has been made redundant I have been watching what we can live on. After bills if we are careful we can live on £200 a week for food, fuel, kids clubs etc
If you havent done so you could work out the same for you then you know what income you need

[Lilka]

Thanks ever so much for the advice

[fasparent]

Wish you luck a Individual Budget plan will assess your dd every day need's care and social and cost it all out. May want too go shopping meet people own age could require being accompanied by a carer, it's about her being able too live a near normal life as possible, getting into work may need assistance for example, could work from home with a PA
you do really need help too identify all her needs as an adult , I was very surprised at the idea's his LA and advocate came up with and put into practice thing we would never of thought of, Its about simple thing
that give a better quality, Courses , care, leisure etc. .

[fasparent]

Hi again thought I would say their is another side too the coin, we also have two other adopted children with special need's our dd was like your dd in transition is now In full time employment and self supported with no financial support at all.
Our youngest ds has CP and communication problem's attends SN School
hope he will end up as our dd but will need support in the 1st instance main thing at the moment is inclusion, he requires 1 too 1 support but is improving all the time. Can only hope for better outcomes for him.
good luck with every thing

[jardy]

Is your dd capable of administering her own budget?If not then I would have thought you would continue to be her appointee.I would google Citizens Advice and down load the benefits guide.Good Luck and sending my very best wishes to you

[2old2beamum]

Hi Lilka, just a quick reply both my DDs (adopted) 23 & 27 get DLA and I assume will change to PIP and they get ESA at the enhanced rate £112.05/week. This is the support group as they are not capable of working
Good luck a bit of a bummer re adoption allowance