What does this mean in the linking/matching process

(8 Posts)
Bananaketchup Sat 22-Dec-12 17:41:46

Okay, I need to think through the real nitty gritty questions I have, and also how to ask them - that's useful, thank you Kristina.

Devora I did think that suggesting we meet was a good sign they think I might be a match, especially as they are a significant distance away - presumably they don't meet loads of potential matches, especially if there's travel expense involved. Which is exciting, but also a bit scary!

Thanks

Devora Thu 20-Dec-12 23:42:43

If they want to meet you, they are seriously considering you for the match. In my case, the fc didn't come to that first meeting, though she sent a few (strange) questions for us to answer (e.g. Q: why do you want to adopt a mixed race child? A: err, because we're approved for a mixed race child? And we are a mixed race family? Unlike you? grin).

So we first of all met with our SW, the child's SW and the family finder. After a few days they told us they wanted the match to progress, and then they brought the foster carer to visit. After that we had a meeting with the medical officer, then an introductions planning meeting, then matching panel (the last two should be the other way round in theory, but sometimes not in practice).

Good luck!

KristinaM Thu 20-Dec-12 23:14:25

YY

But you don't want to ask about routines at this stage, you only need this info nearer the time a child moves in. You need to work out what information is critical to your decision making process now.

So what factors will influence your decision about whether or not this is the right child for you? That might be about their background or their development, contact with birth family etc. Presumably you are not going to decide yes or no based on their routines.

What would be a deal breaker for you? How can you find out about this at this meeting? Bear in mind that you might have to ask indirectly rather than directly

HTH

FamiliesShareGerms Thu 20-Dec-12 20:12:18

Sorry, we didn't do this bit, so I am clueless about it! But you are completely right that meeting the FC is soooo helpful

Good luck

Bananaketchup Thu 20-Dec-12 19:55:45

Thanks that's really helpful - I'd love to meet the foster carer, I bet she could answer loads of my questions about behaviour, routines etc. The other LA is over 2 hours away from me though, so I don't know if she'd be able to come. Thanks for info!

MyDogEatsPoop Thu 20-Dec-12 19:27:41

To clarify - we had a couple of days to think about it; not right there and then!

MyDogEatsPoop Thu 20-Dec-12 19:26:22

Oooh - sounds promising! The first meeting we had after being given details was with our social worker, the child's social worker, and the foster carer. There was talk of the family finder, and the social workers boss (because sw was relatively new) being there as well, but in the end it was just the three of them. We were matched from the same LA, but I doubt it would be that different.

You'll need to go through the CPR and find a few questions to ask. The foster carer was great, and really enthusiastic, and gave us loads of info that wasn't in the CPR. We had some photos and a video, and a look at her school report, and then a big discussion about when and how long intros would take etc. Everyone asked everyone else questions, and they had a quick look at the house.

Then we had a big think about it, and let the SW know that we wanted to go ahead - we weren't in a competitive match, so it was all pretty painless.

Best of luck!

Bananaketchup Thu 20-Dec-12 19:05:56

Hi all,

can you educate me re linking/matching please? I have made enquiries after seeing a profile at an exchange day, CPR and PAR have been swapped and I've asked a few extra questions via email which the SW answered. Now the other agency's SW has asked if I want to progress to a visit - what does this mean? Do they visit me, and who would visit I take it family finder, child's SW, would my SW be there? Is it a time to ask questions or is it about them looking at me, the house etc more than for me to get more info?

All help gratefully received, as you can tell although I thought I was thoroughly versed in the adoption process this has caught me out a bit!

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