I got a phone call from the LA, and they would like me to talk at one of their upcoming prep groups. It's an all morning thing with several adopters coming in to talk. They can ask us questions just after we speak, or if they want to talk to us individually or ask something they don't want to in front of everyone, we stick around through lunch as well
I'm definitely happy to do it. So I've been thinking all evening about what to talk about. There's so many things I could mention really! Process itself, introductions, emotional/behavioural issues we deal with, contact, adopting older children, accessing support, school.... I want to be informative and realistic but also positive. Also, I recognise that some people there may now very little about modern adoption, but on the other hand some of them might have done lots of research and know much more. Problem is, i pick any one of those issues, but with three very very different children, it's difficult to know what to focus on! Their issues are so different, their contact, their school experience, girls were older, but DS was a young toddler...everything really!
So, I'd like to ask
- Prospective adopters who haven't yet been on prep course, what are you hoping to learn about from the adopters talk?
- Anybody who's already been to prep and had an adopters talk - was there anything specific you found useful to hear about? Anything that wasn't good? Anything important you think should be covered? What questions did you have afterwards?
- Has anyone here done a talk themselves? What goes down well, or doesn't? Any tips? And what kind of questions do they tend to ask you afterwards?
Well done Lilka! I saw the thread too late but wanted to add that I hope you told them about how well your DD1 is doing as a mother. This is something I would worry about for 18 year old foster dd who has an AD (but is currently doing really well) and had very poor/neglectful parenting for her first three years. Maybe it's not something I should be saying 'out loud' but I do worry for her that if she was to have children, she wouldn't know how to be a good mother because she's never had a good mother.
It's fantastic to hear that your dd is being a brilliant Mum and that you're having such joy with your GD.