Wanting to adopt

[ESBay]

Hi all. My husband and I would like to adopt a child between the ages of 3-7 and we already have a birth child who is 7. We live in Buckinghamshire and have already started the process. Is there anyone out there local to use who has been through the process and would be willing to chat about their own experiences of the whole thing!? Looking forward to hearing from someone soon. Thanks all.

[snail1973]

I'd be happy to chat. I am not too far from you and have adopted 2 children (separately) through 2 different LAs
Not sure how this works, but in these situations people always seem to say 'DM me'. So if you can work out how to do that please do! Chat soon

[ESBay]

Hi. Thanks for replying. Where are you located? I'm new to all this and have only just signed up to Mumsnet so I'm not even sure what 'DM me' means! Our social worker has said she will put us in touch with local families but I'd like to show that I'm motivated and trying to do things 'off of my own back'. Do you also have any birth children?

[snail1973]

DM me means send me a direct message - I have sent you one with my contact details on

[ESBay]

Ok. Thanks. I've just seen an inbox button at the top of this page so I'm assuming it will be in there!? I'll message you back.

[InsanityandherGerbils]

Hi ESBay and welcome :)

I'm a single mum with 3 children by adoption (all seperately!!)

Hope you're finding the process OK so far. Have you been on prep group yet, or started homestudy?

There's quite a few of us adopters here so sure some more people will come along later

[ESBay]

Currently waiting to attend a prep group in May. We have been told it will be four days long and will take place on a Thursday and Friday of two consecutive weeks. What exactly goes on at these prep groups!!??

[InsanityandherGerbils]

Prep group is basically adoption education class. You'll get an overview of the process, get told about the kind of children who become available for adoption (they'll talk about their backgrounds, about neglect/abuse etc), and the problems they may face as a result of their experiences (attachment issues for instance, which is seriously worth reading about). You'll be asked to talk in group discussions with the others about things like what's led you to adoption and so on. Hopefully you'll get a talk from an actual adoptive parent as well, about what their adoption has been like. Some other posters will have been to prep group recently and I'm sure they can tell you exactly what they did.

It's also a good chance to meet all the other potential adopters in your area. I kept contact with some others I met on prep group. I'm now close friends with some adopters I met on my prep class in 1995!!

SS will use this opportunity to assess for themselves whether they think you are what they are looking for

[SallyDon]

Hi ESBay,
I'm an adopter with two children and a MN blogger (adoption issues). Happy to answer any questions.
We learnt a lot during our prep course and it cemented our decision to adopt. I agree with Insanity, the attachment stuff is very important and there's probably more about it then there was when we did our course (9 yrs ago).
Have you looked at the Adoption UK website, they have a very active message board for those at all stages of the process?
Good luck!