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My new neighbour just knocked on my door

(460 Posts)
dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:04:41

They moved in last night at 10pm. Just had a knock and there he is, asking me not to cook bacon, as he's finding it offensive. And that it will make it easier to be neighbours in the future if I just do as asked. I am still lost for words. Yes, I was cooking some bacon and my kitchen window was open, BUT REALLY???? What's next?

RoseberryTopping Sat 24-May-14 09:06:57

Omg what did you say?! I'm all for getting on with neighbours but I would not be asking for permission to cook bacon!

maddy68 Sat 24-May-14 09:08:19

Say I like bacon, I'm giving you advanced warning I will be cooking it every day

BlameItOnTheMoonlight Sat 24-May-14 09:08:55

shock

GlitteryShit Sat 24-May-14 09:09:17

I'd throw a big welcome party for them complete with hog roast! grin

sonlypuppyfat Sat 24-May-14 09:09:30

I'd spit a whole hog and roast it the cheeky twat. Who does he think he is.

TidyDancer Sat 24-May-14 09:09:51

WTAF?! Is this for real?

I'm vegetarian and the smell of bacon cooking makes me feel queasy but I wouldn't dream of telling neighbours not to cook it!

What did you say in reply?

RudyMentary Sat 24-May-14 09:10:00

This would be like a red rag to a bull for me I'm afraid grin

sonlypuppyfat Sat 24-May-14 09:10:01

X post sorry

libertytrainers Sat 24-May-14 09:10:32

agree with maddy, poor you not a good start is it.

CrispyFern Sat 24-May-14 09:10:40

Oh dear!

thornrose Sat 24-May-14 09:11:01

Hmm, that's not a good start! Bloody hell shock

Rissolesfortea Sat 24-May-14 09:11:54

Tell him to fuck off jog on!

YouAreCompletelyRight Sat 24-May-14 09:12:08

Are you asking for some new bacon recipes?

KellyHopter Sat 24-May-14 09:12:24

Gosh. Really.
hmm

TheFairyCaravan Sat 24-May-14 09:12:44

Really?!shock

FruVikingessOla Sat 24-May-14 09:12:54

Blimey shock

I thought you were going to say how nice it was that your new neighbour came and introduced himself.

But ...... I'm lost for words!

YussMinister Sat 24-May-14 09:13:05

Tell him you've checked your tenancy agreement and council bylaws and there's nothing saying what you can and can't cook in your own house. "It's out of my hands"

Sheldonswhiteboard Sat 24-May-14 09:13:11

sounds like a nut job. I'd be cooking bacon and kippers next!

kinkymouse Sat 24-May-14 09:15:08

What the. I am guessing you will be posting some other gems from this delightful being in the next few months. Good luck.

dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:15:15

Oh this is for very real!

I just said sorry. It was so random and unexpected that I just did not know what else to say. Just blurted out sorry and shut the door. I am still in my pj's and didn't really feel like chatting there for ages. It's raining too.

I do think that it's going to be bacon for breakfast all week now.

MammaTJ Sat 24-May-14 09:15:22

Some people really do take the bacon biscuit!

GiveTwoSheets Sat 24-May-14 09:15:40

I would knock on his door this morning whilst eating bacon sarnie and mention that he might not want to unpack.

Annianni Sat 24-May-14 09:16:01

Would you like me to send you some bacon?

I would not be impressed with the neighbour and would be cooking it every single day.

BornOfFrustration Sat 24-May-14 09:16:23

And that it will make it easier to be neighbours in the future if I just do as asked

Nasty git

BrokenToeOuch Sat 24-May-14 09:16:32

Post a bacon butty through his letterbox grin
Erm, he is a weirdo and if I just do as asked is just a bit disturbing and creepy. Cheeky twat. I hope you told him to fuck off.

mousmous Sat 24-May-14 09:16:49

cook pulled pork?
hours of delicious porky smell for hours and hours!
next time ask him where in the law it says that cooking food is not allowed?

He's a tit.

Bacon
Gammon
Pulled Pork.

Do it.

Start logging his complaints now, he sounds like he might be a shellfish neighbour, sorry.

cheekygeeky Sat 24-May-14 09:18:10

What did you say?

dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:18:16

Kinkymouse I really hope not. I had enough of the previous couple and their weed stench.

*Hellish neighbour, not shellfish.

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:20:04

Awaiting this thread getting heated...

dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:21:11

I was planning on cooking slow cooked pork belly tomorrow. 8 hours in the slow cooker should be enough, right?

Clarabum Sat 24-May-14 09:21:19

As we say in Glasgow, "Get tae f***"

Blueuggboots Sat 24-May-14 09:22:16

Entitled or what??!!
I'd ignore him entirely. Forget it ever happened. Continue living your life as you wish to and go on a bacon only diet

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 09:22:29

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kim147 Sat 24-May-14 09:22:35

What did you say when he asked?

HeyJules Sat 24-May-14 09:23:04

What on earth! blushblush I'm lost for words too.

Bourdic Sat 24-May-14 09:23:37

What Still says - start the log, you're going to need it when you complain of harassment to the police

CorusKate Sat 24-May-14 09:23:48

One of my racist less pleasant relatives moved house because "It always stinks of curry here these days".

Where people live, people need to cook food to eat. I can't work out why some people seem to struggle with this fairly basic part of life and living in a community.

It's your house, do whatever you want.

Be prepared the next time he knocks as there will be one, you do know that?

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:26:13

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dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:26:32

Kim147 I just said sorry. Obviously now I can think of more appropriate things to have said, but at the time that was all that came to mind.

Buttercup27 Sat 24-May-14 09:26:56

Bacon for breakfast, mackerel for lunch and curry for tea? That should be smelly enough . Of course you would need all of your windows open as it's just too hot to cook with them closed !

Rissolesfortea Sat 24-May-14 09:27:11

"If you do as I say" sounded threatening to me, def start a log, I think you will need it.

HeyJules Sat 24-May-14 09:27:15

Sorry to be dense but what do you mean by "yes I'm sure this happened"? why would OP make it up?

cheekygeeky Sat 24-May-14 09:27:40

Coruskate - I have a similar story. Whilst at uni a fellow student used to always complain of the curry smell in my shared house. He was a horrible nasty guy. Always made my Asian housemate really uncomfortable. His face was a picture when I told him the curry was mine and that my Asian friend only knew how to cobble together beans on toast.

MargotLovedTom Sat 24-May-14 09:27:52

Oh God, my heart is sinking for you. He sounds like he's going to be an awkward arsehole to have next door.

I know you were caught on the back foot but please don't apologise to him again for living a normal life.

Wonder if there's some religious reasons why he's anti bacon?

possiblyprecious Sat 24-May-14 09:27:55

It comes across as threatening behaviour to me. An implied threat about what might happen if you don't do what he says.

dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:28:13

I'm moving in august, so if he is a massive twat, I don't have to deal with him for too long.

YouAreCompletelyRight Sat 24-May-14 09:29:09

Our old neighbours asked us to adjust our bedtimes to match theirs as they could hear us walking around after they went to bed and before they got up. They eventually sold their semi (thankfully to lovely normal people) and moved to a detached place.

Your neighbour should live somewhere remote if he doesn't appreciate the give and take of living next door to other people.

I personally love kitchen smells. I used to live with my granny in a top floor flat as a kid. When I came home from school and entered the front entrance door I'd hope the lovely cooking smells was my tea (and it usually was).

Bourdic Sat 24-May-14 09:30:10

Dillite- well in that case........

DurhamDurham Sat 24-May-14 09:31:03

I think if you put your mind to it and try really hard you can manage to exist entirely on bacon until you move out in August grin

Iwillorderthefood Sat 24-May-14 09:31:04

You will be armed for next time, with appropriate phrases. I cannot believe that the neighbour had the nerve to move in at 10 pm last night probably with great disturbance and then knocks on your door with this in the morning. Get your log started, not with the knocking on door incident, but the 10pm one from last night. Smoked bacon gives off more smell doesn't it, hope you like it.

CharlesRyder Sat 24-May-14 09:31:09

Agree you need a log and next time he comes round tell him you find his behaviour intimidating and that you are keeping a detailed log of all conversations.

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone Sat 24-May-14 09:31:29

If he comes around again, just say sorry again.

'But that's what you said last time, and you are still doing it.'

'Yes I know, as I said I'm sorry. That you find it difficult both to smell bacon and have any idea of polite conversation. I'm sure you are going to find living here quite hard. That is very regretful. Bye now.'

Oh, you haven't heard the last of him.

I agree with logging everything. And good luck, I think you're going to need it.

MrsWinnibago Sat 24-May-14 09:32:50

I live in a flat OP and one of my neighbours is always commenting on what I've cooked. "Oh was that a pork roast you did yesterday? It smelled lovely." and "Ooh you did fish didn't you? I hate the smell of fish." confused

I don't cook anything odd....and no, fish doesn't smell nice second hand but still! You don't have to bloody comment on my entire menu!

If anyone thinks OP is lying report the thread.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 09:33:57

Have done

HexBramble Sat 24-May-14 09:34:25

I think this is just the start OP.
Agreed that "sorry" is fine:

As in

'Sorry - how unfortunate for you since bacon is my favourite meat'.

Log everything.

CharlesRyder Sat 24-May-14 09:34:32

Leave a copy of the log for the next people too so they can prove it wasn't just them!!

HeyJules Sat 24-May-14 09:36:06

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Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 09:36:44

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notapizzaeater Sat 24-May-14 09:37:31

Is be having bacon breakfast dinner and tea - I don't like bacon much but adore the smell - weird guy

usualsuspectt Sat 24-May-14 09:38:20

Why do you think he found the smell of bacon offensive, OP?

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Sat 24-May-14 09:39:48

Oh dear. I have never heard the like. Your first encounter? Good luck.

gamerchick Sat 24-May-14 09:39:56

yes start a log just in case and leave it in a cupboard or something for the next tenants.

I'm afraid that would be a red rag to a bull and I would be cooking it all of the time now just to make a point.

OwlCapone Sat 24-May-14 09:39:59

I do think that it's going to be bacon for breakfast all week now.

Why? Personally I'd just ignore him and carry on as normal. I wouldn't go out of my way to annoy someone.

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:40:25

Waiting for the m word...

slithytove Sat 24-May-14 09:41:12

Maybe he is on a diet and the smell is just too tempting or is that just me

EhricLovesTheBhrothers Sat 24-May-14 09:41:39

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usualsuspectt Sat 24-May-14 09:42:55

Me too, Buzzard.

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:43:04

Oh, there it is

persepolis123 Sat 24-May-14 09:44:11

Yep buzzard. So predictable hmm

Rissolesfortea Sat 24-May-14 09:44:31

Some muslims can be offensive people too, its not a trait that is exclusive to non muslims!

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 09:44:55

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FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 09:45:36

I predict now the OP will say he wasnt musli? M (so there)

lizzzyyliveson Sat 24-May-14 09:45:54

Yes, it's there are a response to you Buzzard. Please try to keep up!

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:46:01

Hey slithy, you are allowed grilled bacon and poached egg when you low carb...yum smile

usualsuspectt Sat 24-May-14 09:46:15

Is that you, Nigel?

dillite Sat 24-May-14 09:46:22

Why would I be lying? Seriously?

usualsuspect honestly, I have no idea why. He might be religious, as someone mentioned up thread; he might be vegetarian or vegan; he might just not like it; or just be a twat. This was the first time I met the guy.

Although I have had some odd neighbours in that flat in the 4 years I've been here- one would run back inside his house/ hide behind a shed if we ever happened to be outside at the same time. Another one smoked weed from morning till midnight. And the one before him had 15 cats (it's a studio we are talking about here), all of which would use everything as their toilet. She just did not give a damn.

Fannydabbydozey Sat 24-May-14 09:46:40

Mmmmm bacon.

Thanks OP , there I was relatively happy with my two slices of toast, one butter and jam, a real Saturday morning treat, and you have to bring bacon into the equation.

God, I really, really want a bacon sarnie now. Actually, a bacon and fried egg one.

Anyhoo, yes def log this as suggesting that you do as you are told is threatening behaviour. I feel for you. I have a shitty owner neighbour next door - the house is mostly rented out and almost all of the tenants have been lovely. But whenever she turns up to sort stuff out between tenants it is a nightmare: damaging things, chucking furniture into our garden. I fight back and have called the police on occasion but it is draining and highly irritating. I'm not alone, all the other neighbours can't stand her but she's one of these hard nosed, entitled types and merrily carries on being a total shit.... Uuurrrggghhh.

Thank god you can move in august. Just focus on that and eat bacon every day. Mmmmm bacon.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 09:46:40

Without the question mark

Same as Buzzard I thought it might be dropped in at some point.

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:47:05

Well aware of that lizzie hmm

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 09:48:41

Bingo Fanjo grin

MargotLovedTom Sat 24-May-14 09:50:45

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slithytove Sat 24-May-14 09:52:48

Nah, bacon isn't bacon unless it's fried in its own fat <drools>

But I'm having square slice later so no breakfast envy from me!

gamerchick Sat 24-May-14 09:53:09

My first thought that he was just an arsehole who doesn't care about getting off on the wrong foot.

The OP hasn't even mentioned religion, other people have done that which says more about how they think of things than anything else if that's their first thought.

and even if he is.. muslims can be arseholes as well yanno, they aren't exempt, or is that thought just too out there?

Somebody who moves into a pad, knocks on your door and tells you to do as your told is an arsehole.. no matter what his background.

Perfectlypurple Sat 24-May-14 09:53:30

Chances are he is just a twat. Op didnt mention anything about his religion. It may well be it's a religious thing just as he may be a vegan or as she said just a twat.

kim147 Sat 24-May-14 09:54:44

Barbeque season soon.

Lots of potential for nice smells.

BlackeyedSusan Sat 24-May-14 09:54:54

oh dear.

you need to channel the strictest teacher you had at school and give him the look.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 09:55:33

Having had a neighbour who popped up to complain about cooking smells to leaves from my tree falling in his garden in Autumn, (I shit you not) I can well believe this.

SecretNutellaFix Sat 24-May-14 09:55:35

I'd turn and tell him that you aren't cooking bacon, you're cooking the remains of your last problematic neighbour.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 09:59:00

It's the use of the word "offensive" that's the clue.

OwlCapone Sat 24-May-14 10:01:40

It's the use of the word "offensive" that's the clue.

The clue to what?

MargotLovedTom Sat 24-May-14 10:01:42

gamerchick I've explained why I mentioned religion.

I don't think that way as you're implying.

Perfectlypurple Sat 24-May-14 10:01:53

I am a vegetarian. I don't find the smell of meat offensive but I don't particularly like it. I do know other vegetarians and one does find the smell of meat offensive. She doesn't even like looking at it.

CrabbyBlossomBottom Sat 24-May-14 10:02:20

The OP hasn't even mentioned religion, other people have done that which says more about how they think of things than anything else if that's their first thought.

Exactly. A Jewish person could be equally offended by the smell of bacon (or a veggie/vegan/bacon-phobic/nutjob), would that be a UKIP troll too? hmm

persepolis123 Sat 24-May-14 10:03:11

Agreed hakluyt. Not offputting, unpleasant or overpowering.

everlong Sat 24-May-14 10:04:17

Give over.

DoctorTwo Sat 24-May-14 10:04:37

Mmmmmm, bacon.

Noshowofmojo Sat 24-May-14 10:05:27

It could be offensive to his nostrils and if we're surmising on religions he could be Jewish...that on the bingo card?

RandallFloyd Sat 24-May-14 10:07:13

Arf @ 'give over'.
Is that you, nanna? grin

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:08:25

Jules, I'm withholding judgement until I hear whether the neighbour looked like a Muslim or not. If so, I would suspect the OP of making something up to make Muslims appear unreasonable, imposing their values on good British folk, yada yada. However if he was a lentil weaving hippy I will assume this is just a funny story about a twatty neighbour.

Ehric you are a massive twat if you don't realise that paragraph is a crime against logic and reason.

dillite Sat 24-May-14 10:08:30

What bingo? I have seen it mentioned on a few threads before, but still have no idea what that is.

BuzzardBird Sat 24-May-14 10:10:18

Yes, it would.

DurhamDurham Sat 24-May-14 10:10:41

It's just typical, lots of posters hanging around just waiting to be offended on someone else's behalf.

Whatever the reason for the neighbour's apparent strange behaviour the op can cook as much bacon as she likes in her own kitchen.

theresnowheretohidewithachip Sat 24-May-14 10:11:15

Why are people only talking about the 'M' word? Neighbour could just as easily be Jewish.

I come from a Jewish but very unobservant family. Our neighbourhood was very Jewish. I remember my Mum absolutely SLAMMING the grill door shut when a very observant neighbour called round one evening. He said nothing about the smell. She said nothing. After he'd left we were all like "Oh God Mum, what's he going to think". Mum said "Well, he can think what he likes but he can't say anything because if he's such a good Jew, he shouldn't know what cooking bacon smells like should he?" Sorry, off topic I know but it just reminded me.

Ignore neighbour. Whatever his religious beliefs or culinary likes and dislikes, you can cook what you flipping well want.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:11:24

Pay no attention dillite. What did you have for breakfast?

SteadyEddie Sat 24-May-14 10:11:31

Or a Vegetarian Buddhist.

MargotLovedTom Sat 24-May-14 10:12:07

Okay - as I see it this is why PP thought the OP was being...mischievous.

Neighbour knocks on door and says he finds smell of bacon offensive. We know Muslims do not eat bacon for religious reasons.

Neighbour tells female neighbour she needs to do as she's asked in future. Muslim men treat women like shit, I know I've read about it in the Sun/Mail/whatever.

I never considered that this thread might have an agenda until people started squwaking about UKIP and the 'M' word. And I still don't think it has an agenda.

I do think that troll hunting is stupid.

The only reason this thread has taken a turn for the worse is the people making thinly veiled references to racism. Other than that, religion and race has not been mentioned.

Glad you are moving, OP. He does not sound friendly.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:13:21

Why are people only talking about the 'M' word? Neighbour could just as easily be Jewish.

Yep;

Muslim
Jewish
Veggie
Vegan
Wanker

Loads of possibilities.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 10:13:39

"It's just typical, lots of posters hanging around just waiting to be offended on someone else's behalf."

Eh?

ohhhhhhhhh, you think that if the OP's neighbour was a Muslim all us bleeding heart liberals would be saying that the OP should stop cooking bacon immediately???hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

It actually doesn't matter what race or religion the neighbour is, he was trying to throw his weight around and intimidate op. It's not on.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 10:16:23

Absolutely. If it happened, he is an arsehole.

unlucky83 Sat 24-May-14 10:16:46

Only on MN - when I read OP I just thought vegetarian - or vegan and bacon is smelly ...

To OP - don't let him intimidate you ...he sounds like a bully. I had a problematic neighbour and I tried to keep the peace and not rise but it just made him even more convinced he could do what he liked ...and when I finally did put my foot down it turned really nasty...
Get the log started - don't let him bully you -but don't deliberately antagonise him -if you weren't going in August I would be suggesting moving ...this is not going to go well!
Good luck ...problem neighbours can make your life hell...

dillite Sat 24-May-14 10:16:58

Thanks FidelineandFumblin. I had some poached eggs with bacon and a tomatoe/ cucumber salad. It was deelish. I've been craving poached eggs for a week now.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:17:00

It actually doesn't matter what race or religion the neighbour is, he was trying to throw his weight around and intimidate op. It's not on.

This.

KayVerinder Sat 24-May-14 10:18:22

If it helps, I use the word offensive to describe unpleasant smells, usually Aromatics.

I would take the use of the word offensive in this context to mean unpleasant as opposed to offending a religious belief.

MargotLovedTom Sat 24-May-14 10:19:05

Well yes, my first thought as I said was that he's an awkward arsehole. Then I thought I'd give him the benefit of the doubt if he found bacon offensive because of religious reasons.

Then I thought I must've been a bit gullible, but now I don't know! confused grin

I just assumed that the man dislikes strong cooking smells confused

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:19:45

I had some poached eggs with bacon and a tomatoe/ cucumber salad. It was deelish.

It sounds it smile. That's really put me off my nice sensible porridge sad

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:20:08

I don't see why the OP would make this up. There are a fruit loops out there.

It could be that he is simply an arse and is intending to start as he means to go on. He could be looking an excuse to let you know he's in charge and you need to know your place. If you pay any heed to him now I can almost guarantee it will continue. "Move your car so I can park there" "I don't like you hanging your underwear on the line" etc. I'm speaking from experience here. It took years before I finally stood up to my neighbours and what a showdown. They've stayed away from me since. grin and I live in a naice area. Lol

I agree with the posters who say keep a log. If you were staying any longer I would suggest getting a camera/doorbell, the camera is activated when the doorbell is rung. As Charles suggested, leave a log behind when you move out so the new people are given a heads up and will be ready for him.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:24:02

I just assumed that the man dislikes strong cooking smells

You'd think, wouldn't you Psammead?

Welcome to C21st paranoid Britain.

dillite Sat 24-May-14 10:25:54

I think I might actually get a diary and keep it just in case, you never know, this might have been a one off following an exhausting house move, or he might turn out to be a pain in the arse. We share a landlord, I can always complain to him, if things do get out of hand.

FidelineandFumblin porridge does sound quite sad, but it could be made better with some cinnamon and a drop of vanilla extract (this might be my personal peculiar quirk though).

deakymom Sat 24-May-14 10:26:14

is he a renter or an owner if he is a renter complain to his ll its sounding like a threat

CrispyFern Sat 24-May-14 10:28:54

I hate the smell of bacon. Incidentally.

fairyfuckwings Sat 24-May-14 10:30:48

I've heard it all now!

Cucumber does not belong on the same plate as bacon. That's just wrong.

Inertia Sat 24-May-14 10:35:17

What's a square slice ? Sure you can't get square bacon these days ?

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:35:22

porridge does sound quite sad, but it could be made better with some cinnamon and a drop of vanilla extract

Funny you should say that - I actually have a vanilla extract mountain I've been wondering what the hell to do with. True fact - I keep reflex buying it for some reason - the good seven quid stuff too.

Bad news is daughter is addicted to all things cinnamon and has been inhaling the stuff. I might buy a catering pack of cinnamon to even things up if your suggestion is good smile

Let's just hope my neighbours are ok with the scent of vanilla at breakfast wink

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:36:27

Cucumber does not belong on the same plate as bacon. That's just wrong.

Fairy you are a cucumber fascist. Apologise! wink

AmyMumsnet (MNHQ) Sat 24-May-14 10:38:24

Hi all,

Thanks for your reports. We have no reason to believe the OP isn't genuine so we're going to let the thread stand for the moment.

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:39:19

I've been a vegan for many years. I can't stand the smell of meat cooking and don't get me startedon fish but it would never cross my mind to complain about it. I live my life without interfering in how others live theirs and I expect them to do the same.

Maybe he finds it offensive due to religious or moral reasons or maybe he's on a diet and crys in the corner at the smell of it because he really wants to break into your house and steal all your bacon. It doesn't matter why he finds it offensive, tell him to go forth and multiply and close the door in his face. I don't think reasoning is going to work with this prick.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:40:18

Of course it's bloody genuine, but maybe we should invent a code word for bacon to prevent innocent usuage setting the klaxons off. Good sodding grief. <walks off muttering>

I think you should order some nice fresh manure for your roses, put it close to his window.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:41:16

Sorry Amy that was aimed at the reporters rather than you smile

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:42:12

"Cucumber does not belong on the same plate as bacon. That's just wrong."

You're so right. The poor cucumber should be given to me and I'll eat it. grin

QuintessentiallyQS Sat 24-May-14 10:43:00

I would report him to the police for making threats.

What is he going to do if you eat bacon, that is going to make it difficult for you?

calzone Sat 24-May-14 10:43:26

It is too boring a story to be made up! grin

If OP had made it up, she would have added more detail eg I told him to piss off and offered him a bacon sarnie!!!!

As it was, she was perplexed, said sorry and closed the door.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:43:50

<snort> @ Quint

QuintessentiallyQS Sat 24-May-14 10:43:55

You also need to keep a rash of bacon, to microwave at regular intervals.

KayVerinder Sat 24-May-14 10:45:21

A lady Gaga bacon suit. On the hottest day of the year.

You could wear it to do Yoga in the garden.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:47:00

I hope the OP hasn't been scared off, I suspect she is a Wise Recipe Guru (TM)

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:53:12

Next time he knocks, ask him to wait while you get dressed then answer the door Lady Gaga style ie: bacon dress. I'm so going to get thrown out of the vegan society. blush

EmotionalCrotch Sat 24-May-14 10:53:54

^A lady Gaga bacon suit. On the hottest day of the year.

You could wear it to do Yoga in the garden.^

Excellent idea KayVerinder

When you move out OP you could just leave it on the line to roast in the sun grin

Yes yes to keeping logs. I have had a twat live beside me before. He kept posting pornographic material through my door. dirty old fucker I was glad to move away from him I tell you!

dillite Sat 24-May-14 10:54:23

Thanks Amy! I guess you're not a true mumsnetter until you've had your thread reported.

I'm still here but on my way out. Might think twice about posting again though.

I hoard vanilla and cinnamon too! And add them to everything. I made some fab banana and red berry bread this week with lots of cinnamon.

EmotionalCrotch Sat 24-May-14 10:54:29

^fail!! blush

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 10:54:57

Lady Gaga style ie: bacon dress.

Can you buy the dressmaking pattern in John Lewis, do you think?

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:55:16

Cobblers I should have read back before posting that. You beat me to it Kay. envysad

Fram Sat 24-May-14 10:55:24

There are quite a number of Christians that keep kosher too!

So... lots of people that might not like it.

I adore the taste of bacon, but the smell of it cooking makes me feel utterly sick!

However, I'd never dream of commenting to a neighbour on their food choices.

Canthisonebeused Sat 24-May-14 10:55:50

Your OP just made laugh laugh coffee everywhere.

Send him in his bike

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 10:57:31

Can you buy the dressmaking pattern in John Lewis, do you think?

Lol. Revolting but funny too.

AmyMumsnet (MNHQ) Sat 24-May-14 11:03:51

FidelineandFumblin

Sorry Amy that was aimed at the reporters rather than you smile

Phew - I thought it was a bit early to be annoying people even for me.

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 11:07:30

OP don't be put of. The kind person in me wants to know that you're ok smile and the noisy caw wants to know how the neighbour behaves in future.blush

kinkymouse Sat 24-May-14 11:07:35

Wow there are some very paranoid people on here. I usually miss those threads that turn all weird but this has opened my eyes. notes not to mention cured meats on any future posts

Keep posting OP, don't be put off by any arsiness so far.

CrystalSkulls Sat 24-May-14 11:18:24

to be honest, i would tell the Landlord anyway.. mark the guys card incase he causes hassle for you in the future.

anyone who turns up and tells you "that it will make it easier to be neighbours in the future if I just do as asked" is clearly a complete arsebiscuit.

ajandjjmum Sat 24-May-14 11:22:11

I think a week of bacon inspired dishes should establish his intentions. Please keep us posted!! grin

WolfAndMud Sat 24-May-14 11:26:32

"It's just typical, lots of posters hanging around just waiting to be offended on someone else's behalf."

OwlCapone Sat 24-May-14 11:28:34

to be honest, i would tell the Landlord anyway.. mark the guys card incase he causes hassle for you in the future.

Seriously? On the basis of one encounter? confused

CorusKate Sat 24-May-14 11:33:07

One encounter where he objected to her (perfectly normal) behaviour and implicitly threatened her.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 11:36:52

* I made some fab banana and red berry bread this week with lots of cinnamon.*

<wonders if you can just add the berries to a standard banana bread recipe>

This thread is making me so hungry.

I have a recipe for a very quick,cheap dinner that involves bacon and is delicious

Get some spaghetti on to cook
Chop smoked streaky bacon and fry
While the bacon is cooking finely slice an onion (red is best) and add that to the frying bacon
Slice up some red/orange or yellow pepper and then add to cooking bacon and onion
Drain the spaghetti, add the baconey mix to it with a bit of olive oil and black pepper.
If you want, top with grated cheddar too
Scoff.

AwkwardSquad Sat 24-May-14 11:45:50

You could experiment with cooking other smelly foods and see how he reacts. Smoked haddock is a good one and the bonus is that it's delicious. Smoked haddock risotto - mmmmm.

CrystalSkulls Sat 24-May-14 11:45:56

if someone i didn't know came to my door and made a veiled threat within 12 hours of moving in, yes i would tell the landlord! why wouldnt you?

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 11:48:21

Thanks quiet that's tonight's dinner sorted.

I suspect it will be possible to drive around and literally sniff out MNers this evening wink

MostlyMama Sat 24-May-14 11:49:29

Don't let this man dictate what food you can and can't cook in your own house OP!

Methe Sat 24-May-14 11:50:51

Sausages for lunch, pork chops for tea?

Staywithme Sat 24-May-14 11:51:33

Owl. Seriously? On the basis of one encounter?

That was the very first conversation she had with her neighbour, that he instigated, so yes I would report it. If she leaves she has just given him permission to bully her.

You are welcome Fideline grin

RevoltingPeasant Sat 24-May-14 12:01:48

Op I agree with those saying tell LL. I am not normally one for going REPORT every time someone looks at me funny, but I think there is a chance he could go the LL with his bonkers side first.

Personally I'd nip this right in the bud by emailing the LL (so it is in writing) and just say simply, "Your new tenant came around early this morning to tell me not to cook bacon and that I should do as he says or he will not be able to get along with me. I don't think the tenancy agreement says I can't cook bacon and I don't like being spoken to in that bullying fashion. I won't take this further now, but please could you just make a note of this? Thanks."

Then get started on tonight's carbonara.....

FauxFox Sat 24-May-14 12:02:00

Maybe it was offensive to him because he's only just moved in and hasn't had time to shop so he had to have bran flakes for breakfast and was jealous?
Or maybe he is doing the 5:2 and was on a fast day and the delicious smell was upsetting him. This would be good because in this case it won't bother him 5/7ths of the time.
Or maybe he is allergic to bacon and eating it makes him swell up and go blue and he felt you were taunting him with your bacony goodness?

AlpacaPicnic Sat 24-May-14 12:11:38

The only bad thing about cooking bacons is that it makes me really want bacon.
Mmm bacon.
Chicken breast wrapped in streaky smoked bavon with mashed potatoes and garlic bread is the most divine meal.

Op your neighbor sounds like a knobber.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 12:16:22

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 12:22:19

"It's just typical, lots of posters hanging around just waiting to be offended on someone else's behalf."

Don't understand. Could you explain?

nethunsreject Sat 24-May-14 12:24:31

Two words for you OP: Cullen Skink.

(Smoked haddock soup - stinks and delicious)

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 12:27:25

Yes. Expressing mild concern at an OP which is worded totally like those islamophobic memes all over facebook is much worse than calling people twats and cunts like a fishwife.

It doesn't matter what op was cooking.

The neighbour was rude and aggressive. There was definitely a veiled threat there and I too think you should email the LL just to get it noted by a third party.

Fanjo you are reading too much into it.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 12:30:57

Ok. We can agree to differ.

No need for hurling abuse though is there.

Good grief.

CorusKate Sat 24-May-14 12:32:11

Nobody even brought up Islam until the snidey "hmm waiting for the m-word" and "yes, of course this really happened" posts started turning up. The bigots are able to get away with claiming they're hard done by and that people are over-sensitive precisely because of this kind of behaviour. If nobody's mentioned Muslims then implying the OP's post is Islamophobic because it mentions bacon is playing right into the hands of the real Islamophobes.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 12:33:00

Right ok. Thats your opinion. Fair enough.

DurhamDurham Sat 24-May-14 12:33:23

It is offensive to accuse and report the op just because she mentioned bacon in a post. That is all she did. There was no indication in her post that it was even slightly racist. That only came later when posters suggested it must be racist. Who would have thought that bacon sandwiches could become such a contentious issue.

Do we report all posts that mention bacon, or just those that mention bacon AND neighbours?

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 12:34:35

Fair enough.

Thats your opinion.

I was objecting to the abuse hurling. Which has thankfully now been deleted.

Will leave you to it.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 12:35:01

The bigots are able to get away with claiming they're hard done by and that people are over-sensitive precisely because of this kind of behaviour.

This. To the nth. I wish more people could see it.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 12:37:31

Well it probably helps the bigots too that if people express concern others round on them and call them twats and cunts. The bigots will love that..while we are talking of encouraging bigots. Anyway fill yer boots am off out.

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 12:39:27

Is this a meat thing or just bacon.

What would happen if you made roast pork tomorrow?

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 12:40:28

Do we report all posts that mention bacon, or just those that mention bacon AND neighbours?

Bacon AND neighbours I'd think Durham. After all we don't want to get silly about it do we? <rolls eyes>

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 12:41:36

I do think some people are underthinking this.

LumionaMoonsplash Sat 24-May-14 12:42:06

I'd have denied it, I haven't cooked bacon confused? Suggest he might want to see the doctor about imaginary smells.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 12:44:29

Bacon fine.
Neighbour fine.
Bacon/neighbour/offended/element of woman, know thy place-just maybe not fine. HTH

iK8 Sat 24-May-14 12:44:36

Oh. Were all the deleted posts because someone suggested he might be Muslim? Or Jewish?

Well he might be. Or a vegan or a vegetarian or has a pregnant partner with a sense of smell that would put a blood hound to shame, or a dog who goes crazy for bacon... or he might just be a massive bellend. Who knows?

OP, very weird behaviour and in your shoes I would have been equally flummoxed and mumbled sorry too. Then I would have posted about it on here! grin

Now I am going to make a bacon sandwich because I fancy one. mmmmmm.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 12:46:31

iK8 Multiple people have suggested OP is making whole story up in an effort to forment Islamaphobia hmm

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 12:47:18

It doesnt matter if they are whatever. The fact is one neighbour cannot really be knocking on somones door telling them what to not cook with implied threat.

iK8 Sat 24-May-14 12:48:22

Really? What nitwits they must be Fid.

To the nitwits: Sorry you are a nitwit and were offended by this post.

Itsfab Sat 24-May-14 12:50:12

I have been caving bacon in toasted bread so have bought 2 packs today but happy to share one grin.

AllTheMadmen Sat 24-May-14 12:50:13

He could have been a Vegie, I belive that bacon cooking is something that turns most veggies back!

Didnt Kate moss, bloke say he too was a veggie but then she cooked him a bacon sarnie and that was it.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 12:50:15

grin @ iK8

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 12:57:24

"It doesnt matter if they are whatever. The fact is one neighbour cannot really be knocking on somones door telling them what to not cook with implied threat."

Couldn't agree more.

The neighbour obviously had a very unusual way of expressing his distaste for cooking smells. I am sure he will be round to express his distaste for other things the OP might cook as well- as somebody suggested, poached haddock might be a good one. Isn't language fascinating!

Skina Sat 24-May-14 12:57:56

I would like to add that I wasn't deleted not because I made the absurd comments about religion, but merely for expressing my dislike of posters who wait for something they perceive as offensive on just about every topic and won't drop it.

Not that I give a fuck tbh.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 12:59:52

Skina- would you tell me who found what offensive? I'm a bit baffled!

CominThroughTheWry Sat 24-May-14 13:01:15

I used to live in a lovely flat. A week after moving in my upstairs neighbour left me a rather terse note asking me not to put my hob/grill/oven on in the evening as she felt it made her flat too hot. She explained it was fine for her to do it as no one lived above her.

She also complained that she could hear me switching the kettle on. She would bang on her floor if I "disobeyed".

I cooked my pasta sauce for hours. I had many, many cups of tea. Cue more notes about "disobeying".

She even complained about my dog. My lovely sedate non barking, non whining old dog. She could hear her yawning. Yes, she did a mean old theatrical yawn my old dog. That's when the gauntlets came off.

I involved our landlady. My lovely landlady who surrounded herself on every occasion with an undulating mass of small furry dogs.

I unleashed (quite literally) hell. grin

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 24-May-14 13:01:33

Oh skina is having a go at me again Hak.

I really dont give a fuck though. Not just saying I dont like some

Skina Sat 24-May-14 13:03:48

I am not giving a go at you FFS. If I was I'd address you.

What were people finding offensive? Apparently the mention of bacon/neighbour combo means the OP is racist.

ShineSmile Sat 24-May-14 13:08:56

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Right shine, because not eating bacon means you've lost your sense of smell and live in a bubble where nobody else cooks bacon either.

I'm assuming your post was sarcastic but it was in very poor taste.

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 13:14:40

"What were people finding offensive? Apparently the mention of bacon/neighbour combo means the OP is racist."

Nope. Still don't understand. The only person who has been "offended" or found anything "offensive" is the OP's neighbour.

cheepcheep Sat 24-May-14 13:20:29

Tell him that you find his attempts to curb your personal freedom offensive and a borderline infringement of your human rights. Then tell him you will be having a full hog roast at the weekend unless he stays away from your door.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 13:23:32

Are you bring deliberately obtuse? It seems so.

riskit4abiskit Sat 24-May-14 13:28:35

Mmmm bacon

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 13:33:55

Could this a reverse about curry or spice smells hence suspicion about the OP...thats why it is deliverately obtuse?

This is based on other peoples repleis referring to certain groups of people.

I stand by, not telling others what to cook..as I said up thread.

Anyhoos, you could always invite them to do a meal plan.

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 13:34:27

bollocks to spellings - sorry.

iK8 Sat 24-May-14 13:40:40

Why we can't just take a thread at face value I do not know. This obsession with picking threads to death that are on the face on them perfectly acceptable and plausible is BORING

There are a few of them today. Dull, dull, dull.

Obvious troll threads excepted of course.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 13:45:16

But why assume it's bollocks? Why jump in with but this and infer that op is a. Racist and b. Lying.

Having lived next to a neighbour from hell I can well believe this.

Only on Mumsnet can just about every OP offend someone, somewhere who gets off on reading something into nothing.

Maybe, just maybe, there are nice people in the world.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 13:46:40

Lovely x-post there iK8 grin

vrtra Sat 24-May-14 13:48:18

This thread did immediately bring this story to mind tbh due to the use of the word offensive. I would personally give 0 fucks and continue till he complains and the council laugh him out of the building, assuming that this neighbour exists

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1322435/Cafe-owner-ordered-remove-extractor-fan-case-smell-frying-bacon-offends-passing-Muslims.html

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 13:54:46

Look. The OP is loaded with hmms. Not least "What next?"

iK8 Sat 24-May-14 13:58:52

I am actually eating a bacon sandwich RIGHT NOW.

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 14:11:25

Im having baked potatoes. I hope this does not offend anyone.

andsmile Sat 24-May-14 14:11:46

I mean just one, Im not greedy.

QueenStromba Sat 24-May-14 14:19:40

The neighbour is clearly not complaining about bacon smells because they are jewish because if they were then they wouldn't be moving house on the sabbath. My money is on wanker.

Coconutty Sat 24-May-14 14:28:01

Tsk tsk all you doubters.

Of course he's not going to turn out to be Muslim after all your M guesses.

My money is on him being Jewish.

Coconutty Sat 24-May-14 14:31:18

Oh fuck it Queen. I forgot about the fucking Sabbath.

captainmummy Sat 24-May-14 14:31:56

My neighbour clocks/smells that I am cooking bacon (every weekend morning!) and comes round with eggs from her chickens 'to go with it'!

Now that's the sort of neighbour you want, OP! grin

DrinkFeckArseGirls Sat 24-May-14 14:34:02

OP do nit leave! You need to cone back and update if he returns! grin <sorry>

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 14:34:32

" My money is on wanker" if it's true of course he's a wanker- regardless of religion or dietary preference!

DrinkFeckArseGirls Sat 24-May-14 14:35:18

My money is on him being a pain in the arse. They come from all sorts of religions and walks of life.

BlueJean Sat 24-May-14 14:41:15

I have (an atheist) relative who cannot stand the smell of bacon.

He says that to him the aroma of bacon cooking smells like well warmed manure. I never cook bacon if he is due to come round because its just not fair to inflict what to him is a nasty smell for no good reason.He is happy enough to eat the bacon if it is an ingredient in a prepared meal though.Its just the smell he cannot stand.

However , in your neighbours case ,as a devout Baconarian ,I would be having my normal bacon sandwiches for every meal with all windows wide open . wink

Skina Sat 24-May-14 14:41:16

I've just gone out, sans umbrella and caught in a tremendous deluge, and bought bacon. Totally because if this thread. fuck 5:2 it's the weekend

ForgiveMeFather Sat 24-May-14 14:43:56

Good grief - how many idiots can you fit into one thread?

OP - I feel for you. Your neighbour sounds a little sinister and a bit controlling. Logging the conversation with your LL is probably a good idea.

In the meantime cook whatever and whenever you please in your own home and garden

Hakluyt Sat 24-May-14 14:46:48

"In the meantime cook whatever and whenever you please in your own home and garden"

Ŷou do realise nobody has suggested she shouldn't?

I'd be having bacon butties every day now.

Greyhound Sat 24-May-14 14:50:03

If this rather cheeky chap is offended by bacon, then I'm surprised if it is for religious reasons. A dear friend of mine is from Iraq and a devout Muslim. I was embarrassed once, as I brought a jar of baby food to her house to feed to my son and it had pork. She laughed and said I could bring a pet pig to her house, she just wouldn't eat it!

slithytove Sat 24-May-14 14:51:52

Square slice is square sausage - Scottish. And bloody gorgeous.

And I find BO and fag smoke offensive... What religion am I? grin

slithytove Sat 24-May-14 14:52:49

and I was one of the vegetarians that cracked due to the smell of frying bacon.

There are so many reasons some tosspot could find the smell offensive.

ForgiveMeFather Sat 24-May-14 14:56:10

Hakluyt - that part of my post was in reaction to her neighbours supposed wishes and not to any comments on this thread.

TheTerribleBaroness Sat 24-May-14 15:05:12

DH can't stand the smell of bacon and won't eat pork or ham. He's an Irish catholic. <shrugs>

Debs75 Sat 24-May-14 15:21:56

OP I want the recipe for banana and red berry bread please.

As for your bacon hating neighbour... just sod him it is only bacon. Tell him you have to have bacon every morning as it is the only hangover cure which works

PerpendicularVincenzo Sat 24-May-14 16:38:38

I can't understand why some posters on MN are so keen to be offended that they invent scenarios and put words in the OP's mouth. It's unhelpful, derailing and there's no point to it.

OP, eat what you like and refuse to be dictated to in your own home.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 16:41:22

Exactly Perpendicular.

dillite Sat 24-May-14 16:47:02

Debs75 Here's my go to recipe www.rachaelray.com/recipe.php?recipe_id=2760. I always double the ingredients as my loaf tin is too big for the recipe. This time round I only had 3 bananas, so I mushed up a punnet of strawberries and some raspberries and blueberries that I had left over- the mushed result was almost a cupful. Mixed it with the mashed bananas and just followed the recipe. I also added 2 teaspoons of cinnamon and some vanilla- didn't measure. Baked it for just under an hour on 160 Celsius. I did skip on choc chips. Also, sometimes I do 2/3 flour and 1/3 ground almonds. It works fab as muffins too, and less baking time, which means you get to eat them sooner!

dillite Sat 24-May-14 16:48:54

Thanks Perpendicular, neither do I to be honest. I have seen it happen many times before, but never thought that I could be one of those that it happens to.

ForgiveMeFather Sat 24-May-14 16:51:15

What Perp said

It's a particularly unpleasant type of derailing too.

UKIP and the Daily Mail must be rubbing their hands with glee.

My favourite comment on the thread has to be 'did he look like a Muslim?' shock

Exactly what is a Muslim supposed to look like?

Unless of course that particular comment was tongue in cheek? In which case I apologise.

Very sad thread but in no way the fault of the OP

PerpendicularVincenzo Sat 24-May-14 16:58:41

Father shock, I missed that comment!

Sorry you've been given a bit of a hard time dillite, and I hope things improve wuth your neighbour.

I'm a firm believer in everyone having the right to be treated kindly, fairly and with respect. It's wrong to look for offence where none is intended.

MiscellaneousAssortment Sat 24-May-14 17:04:11

Gosh. I must admit it didn't occur to me to read in any religious context at all.

It's good to be able to see these things, but it's not good to see these things everywhere, as that plays into the hands of bigots and racists, as well as denting your own credibility.

Watching the thread and being ready to be the voice of reason would have been a better tactic than pre-emptive strike - that merely derailed the thread and made it look like you were punching at shadows.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 17:13:12

Not pre-emptive at all - what was being suggested was very clear very early.

Maybe it made clearer sense before the deletions?

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 17:14:12

Or do you mean the opposite confused?

coldwater1 Sat 24-May-14 17:16:17

I would say i find it offensive that you knock on my door trying to dictate what i can do in MY own home, so in order for us to get along FUCK OFF!

ShotgunNotDoingThePans Sat 24-May-14 18:04:30

Having had a neighbour who popped up to complain about cooking smells to leaves from my tree falling in his garden in Autumn, (I shit you not) I can well believe this.

Whoever said this ^^ upthread < déja vu >
I had a European neighbour who barged past me and swept into my kitchen asking whatever was I cooking as she she could smell it in her kitchen and her mother was there so it was very embarrassing and what were we going to do about the smells coming through the adjoining chimney breast?

She did this on two occasions, both times when I was cooking sausages for mine and a friend's DCs - bizarrely the same friend each time.

She also used to complain about the leaves from my tree falling into her garden. Never thought I'd come across another one like her! AND she actually had the top of the tree hacked off after we'd moved out but before the new owners had moved in.

Rambling on at a late stage to say some people really are just unpleasant, entitled twats and there was never any reason that I saw to assume the op was to be taken at anything other than face value.

GoldieMumbles Sat 24-May-14 18:35:58

"I would say i find it offensive that you knock on my door trying to dictate what i can do in MY own home,"

This - I think I'd have asked him which flat he'd rented, his or mine? If he'd rented mine he could feel free to object to bacon in my home. Otherwise, jog on.

I've lived in France since the mid-1990s and I have to say I am rather perplexed by a lot of what has gone on on this thread, if not generally on MN. The UK seems to have changed so much. There are a lot of anti-UKIP comments on here. I can't agree with UKIP policies - I'm a European now after all these years. But I respect the right of people to have their own beliefs, including beliefs I don't either like or relate to.

And yet there are so many reactions on here with an interpretation of the OP that, actually, doesn't seem to be there. And MNHQ have found no fault with the OP either. So why is there some weird interpretation of not liking bacon = Muslim, so = OP is Islamophobic?

What if - just supposing - the OP is telling the truth AND the person knocking on her door WAS a Muslim? Would that, then, have been excusable?

When I left the UK, people seemed to be able to express views that were similar to what UKIP followers express (in those days, they were Tories). But that's not allowed now, right? Do you not realise that by suppressing debate, by ridiculing their views, you fuel their rise?

And take it from me, with UKIP you have it easy. Over here we have Marine Le Penn and the Front National. Whether the liberal intelligentsia in London like it or not, you need a left and right balance. If ALL practical alternatives lean to the left (and our UMP, which is centre right, about where New Labour was), the result will be that the 'rising' party will be even further to the right.

UKIP are very moderate compared to the FN - and they are THE third force in French politics these days.

Skina Sat 24-May-14 18:42:18

Shotgun it was me. And I pretty much felt that nobody could live next door to such a tosser. Clearly not!

TheBuskersDog Sat 24-May-14 18:45:36

He's a tit.

Bacon
Gammon
Pulled Pork.

Do it.

Start logging his complaints now, he sounds like he might be a shellfish neighbour, sorry.

*Hellish neighbour, not shellfish.

I actually thought you'd done that on purpose, unfortunate typo.

Longdistance Sat 24-May-14 18:47:13

Carry on cooking your bacon.

Next time he knocks because you're cooking bacon, tell him, ' no, it's dog shit on toast', and slam that door in his face.

Cheeky bastard!

leadrightfoot Sat 24-May-14 18:52:08

Haven't read the whole thread and tbh not fussed about getting into political / racial discussions. Actually this behaviour is intimidating and harassment

I would be tempted to start a diary of any and all such interactions and any more comments along the lines of it being easier if you do as you are told I would be reporting to the police as harassment.

MiscellaneousAssortment Sat 24-May-14 18:53:53

I did mean preemptive but I read it after the deletions so I guess OT must have been one of the deletions - bah humbug - That's what I hate about deletions! So now the thread looks like everyone got up in arms about nothing. How misleading.

I do think this rise in the extremities of ukip and of course bnp fuelled views is worrying. And that's why I think we have to be so careful - give them no ammunition or fuell to the fire.

Sorry for the deviation but I just thought I'd share: Over the last few days I keep being reminded of something I read a long time ago - a satirical piece by Jonathan swift called the modest proposal.

He attempts to use satire to show how shocking people's views at the time were on the Irish famines. It didn't work. People could tell the difference between what he wrote and the extremist views if the time. He proposed that the 'Irish problem' could be neatly solved if the starving adults ate their babies. But he got taken seriously.

Lesson I learnt: you can't apply satire to extremists, as Satire exaggerates and amplifies to show how unreasonable the point of view is.

My mind keeps dwelling on that. Hummm.

SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires Sat 24-May-14 20:08:48

Two words for you OP: Cullen Skink.

(Smoked haddock soup - stinks and delicious)

Kedgeree!

~~~~~~~
Anyway,...for we know the guy could be an ex Cannibal.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 21:46:48

Misc look at my post of 10.08 - it quotes one of the deletions.

Goldie you see it exactly the way this Londoner sees it, but no matter how painstakingly one one tries to explain that view, one runs the risk of being accused of being a racism apologist, which is as infuriating as it is daft.

FidelineandFumblin Sat 24-May-14 21:49:38

Especially this; Do you not realise that by suppressing debate, by ridiculing their views, you fuel their rise?

There's nothing as damaging to bigotry as sunlight.

unlucky83 Sat 24-May-14 22:52:37

Damn it - after trying to forget ...and resisting all day - and eating mountains of other food to distract me - at almost 11pm ...I've just pulled the bacon out the freezer....
I'm about to have a bacon butty ...unhealthy white bread, mountains of real butter and brown sauce ...(no wonder I'm fat!)
And of course it is all the OP's neighbours fault!

MiscellaneousAssortment Sat 24-May-14 22:55:58

Fideline read the post thank you.

My conclusion is I'm agreeing with you! I think we've been talking at cross purposes, my fault for not being clearer I'm sure grin

Paq Sun 25-May-14 07:18:49

What's for breakfast OP?

Please please please please cook bacon smile

Dinnaeknowshitfromclay Sun 25-May-14 07:42:14

Let's see if we can make a rasher ==O Streaky ===
That's my attempt, anyone else?

tigerdriverII Sun 25-May-14 08:03:56

Wow. This thread = MN at its worst. Step back and look at the thread, it reads like a bunch of Miss Marples with an abacus busily putting 2 and 2 together.

riskit4abiskit Sun 25-May-14 08:34:59

Im checking into this thread to see if you had bacon this morning too!

ArcherAnguish Sun 25-May-14 08:51:56

I really fancy a bacon and cream cheese bagel after reading this!

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 08:58:31

It truly is Mn at its worst. I totally agree.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:06:04

What buzzard said.
it's grim,

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 09:07:14

It was interesting, though, that many posters suggested retaliating by cooking other pork dishes- as if the neighbour was more likely to be wound up by those than by other very strong smelling cooking.......

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 09:20:49

I think we've been talking at cross purposes

I did wonder Misc grin

It was interesting, though, that many posters suggested retaliating by cooking other pork dishes

Really Hakluyt? Mo more than suggestions to cook different fish if the bully had objected to kippers surely? It has to be food resembling the original food to constitute an effective resistance. No point boiling cabbage - he might adore cabbage.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 09:30:41

Exactly hakluyt.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 09:31:55

Mnhq seem fine with this though...and its their site I guess to police in the way they want to be portrayed.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 09:40:09

Buzzard if it turns out I am missing something I will be mortified but I just can't see it.

Please can you point out what it is that the OP has said that leads you to believe that she has ill intent or that there is a subtext?

ThePowerOfMe Sun 25-May-14 09:48:02

Yeah, I can't believe all these people waiting to see if he's Muslim or not so they can gleefully start spouting their racist crap.

Even if he's a Muslim, so what? He's still an arse who happens to be Muslim. No one is going to pass legislation that you're not allowed to cook bacon anymore and take away your rights to it.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 09:48:52

It wasnt the Op, it was the overall feel of the thread. Mn seems to be overrun with these threads recently. I hope that the elections are the calming down point. I don't think people see it if it doesn't effect them tbh.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:49:03

Well someone linked to that daily Mail story about the muslims being offended by bacon.

Maybe your FB feed hasnt been full of memes about Muslims telling people what they can't eat and all that subway stuff. In which case lucky you.

Oh and there was the "what next".

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:50:11

It read just like these britain first memes that are sadly everywhere.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:52:27

A classic one a "friend" shared the other day had picture of a jewish man and wording "doesn't eat pork products. Doesn't tell others not to".

So when I see an OP about some man storming up.as soon as he has moved in at 10pm and ordering neighbour not to cook bacon as it is offensive to him, in high handed manner ..and see the words "what next?".lets just say alarm bells ring.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:53:15

I will probably get deleted for that explanation.

But its better than getting called a twat a c**t and a failed Miss Marple tbh.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 09:53:24

You see to find the cooking of bacon "offensive" (note, not the smell) it is implied as I and others saw it.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 09:54:32

A classic one a "friend" shared the other day had picture of a jewish man and wording "doesn't eat pork products. Doesn't tell others not to

Nothing to do with the thread but I lovethis. Am stealing it.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 09:54:54

Me too Fanjo, but it won't stop it being true.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:55:47

You love that racist meme SpecialAgent?

Well each to their own.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 09:55:53

Ok - so the OP has done nothing wrong.

Some idiots have been idiotic (as is their wont) and have been deleted.

But some of you still think the thread is somehow racist? (Is that right? I am genuinely confused now)

Fanjo I don't use FB, so don't have to read anyone's nonsensical gibberings.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:56:33

Personally I thought it showed the "friend" to be a bit racist and hard.of thinking.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 09:57:04

To avoid confusion, I'm not Jewish but lots of nasty crap popping up[ on FB lately.

Anyway, I didn't pick up anything in the OP. Now I'm reading debate baconless and alone. sad That is the real argument here

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:57:17

People weren't deleted for racism.

I was deleted for expressing a bit of disbelief at OP.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 09:58:10

Which is fair enough as no troll hunting allowed holds hands up.

People were deleted for mild troll hunting and for pretty severe abuse of those troll hunting.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 09:58:33

I read it as doesn't tell others not to eat pork so bugger off and leave him to his own eating choices. As in stop spreading lies and propaganda? Or is that not how it was intended?

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:00:23

SpecialAgent..the friend in question is not Jewish.

It was a dig at Muslims over the Subway thing.

Practically said "unlike Muslims" in brackets.

Have also even accused of getting excited to get iffended on behalf of someone else.

Nothing could be further from the truth..all the xenophobia around..ie those memes and That Daily Mail story..is really scary and worrying.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:01:12

No it was definitely not intended as that.

Was some dubious Britain First/EDL type concoction.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:01:45

But the troll hunting was actually unwarranted racist-hunting based on nothing ither than the fact that bacon had a walk on role in the OP's story.

It looked like ridiculous paranoia.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:01:51

Like the ones that say "when in Rome do.as the Romas do. When in Britain.." <cringe>

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:01:54

No agent, that meme is to say that Jews are ok but Muslims go around telling everyone what to eat...which is ignorant.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:02:04

^other than...

gamerchick Sun 25-May-14 10:02:18

I doubt the OP is going to come back.. as usual, the threads been taken over by heed the balls who compete against each other to see who can be the most PC.

Yanno, those who leap to defend fresh air in the name of bigotry are just as bad as the bigots themselves, if not worse as you do more damage.

Pimpf Sun 25-May-14 10:02:49

Not good for you op but I can't wait for his next demand!

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:03:04

Err Romans. They would hardly advocate Roma behaviour.

Fideline. Well I have explained the basis for it.

Along with other such threads here recently alarm bells went odd.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 10:03:42

*SpecialAgent..the friend in question is not Jewish.

It was a dig at Muslims over the Subway thing.

Practically said "unlike Muslims" in brackets.

Have also even accused of getting excited to get iffended on behalf of someone else.

Nothing could be further from the truth..all the xenophobia around..ie those memes and That Daily Mail story..is really scary and worrying.*

shock That's bloody disgusting! The Subway thing is just racist propaganda anyway if people bothered to educate themselves Did you unfriend? I have friends with strong views (IE Meat is Murder etc) but we all respect each other. I couldn't socialise with someone like that.

Definitely NOT adding to my FB then! blush

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:04:14

compete against each other to see who can be the most PC.

Ain't that the truth gamer? Always at the expense of intelligent thought.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:05:19

Actually, it wasn't troll hunting on my part...more of a "watch where this goes" and it did. Instantly. Mnhq read it wrong.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:05:23

That is just nonsense gamer.

I care not for being PC. And am very capable of intelligent thought.

Unlike others whose posts are always just very rude.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 10:06:20

Clearly I meme ignorant blush

At least I've missed some of the worse ones, the (still horrible and have been unfriended) stuff I've seen on FB seems mild in comparison to... I typed out a response but the short version is that.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:06:33

I couldn't unfriend for various reasons but was pretty shocked.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:07:26

Special..sorry I misunderstood you first time thanks I did think you were a decent poster so was surprised blush

Buzzard yes I also thought that.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:07:56

Fideline. Well I have explained the basis for it.

It's like dismissing decent journalism because it glancingly touches on the same subject as a Daily Sport clipping your dodgy mate gave you. Madness.

Can I respectfully suggest that subjecting yourselves to a mental diet of bollocks on FB isn't doing your thought processes any good?

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:08:27

Seriously fideline if you think I bother one bit about competing with people to seem right on then you dont know me at all.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:09:12

Actually, it wasn't troll hunting on my part...more of a "watch where this goes" and it did. Instantly. Mnhq read it wrong.

No they didn't. They read it perfectly.

What do you think happened on the thread exactly?

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:09:15

Fideline it's not respectful to insult our thought processes just because they differ from yours.

Its very rude.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:10:14

Fanjo that wasn't directed at you personally. I do believe it is a big strand of the groupthink.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:10:50

Anyway I have explained self.

Now got things to do.

Have a nice day smile

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:11:53

And once again the only ones being offensive and rude are the ones attacking people who try to be kind to everyone.

Skina Sun 25-May-14 10:11:56

Very glad I don't have friends who post racist drivel. hmm

And what Gamer said. So true.

DurhamDurham Sun 25-May-14 10:12:34

This thread has been discussed now for 24 hours and there are still people insisting the op MUST have been racist, she mentioned bacon and a male neighbour in one sentence so what else could she have been implying?! Ridiculous. It makes a mockery of the issues. Just because you want it to be racist does not make it so.

Poor op, probably won't see her again, she's probably gone elsewhere where she feels able to discuss bacon without having to defend herself against unfounded accusations.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:13:12

Buzzard that is very true.

I care not for the opinions of rude abusive people thankfully.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:13:40

<wanders off>

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:13:53

<wanders off>

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 10:14:43

It's quite alright Fanjo, clearly it's a popular meme (sad ) so my issue not yours! flowers

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:14:51

Fideline it's not respectful to insult our thought processes just because they differ from yours.

I didn't mean it like that. I just think maybe you are underestimating the cumulative effect of being exposed to that nonsense. (I bet your actual -food- 'diet' is of a much better quality.)

The alleged resemblance to FB nonsense (I have no idea what a meme even is) is the explanation you yourself have offered what, on the face of it looks like a downright bizarre reaction to and reading of a completely harmless OP, after all.

I am particularly interested in what you have to say about it all because I have long thought you balanced, intelligent, reasonable etc etc and I'm just a bit shock about what has gone on here.

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 10:16:29

Can we all at least agree this thread has made everyone want bacon?

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:16:52

<wanders back> well..thanks fideline. smile

I dont have more to say about it though as other rude posters are just becoming a wee bit personally insulting and I don't have the energy today. And you can't educate some people.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:17:08

<really goes away>

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:20:32

This thread has been discussed now for 24 hours and there are still people insisting the op MUST have been racist, she mentioned bacon and a male neighbour in one sentence so what else could she have been implying?! Ridiculous.

Well quite.

But the new revelation that it's all because people are friends on Fb who have apparently brainwashed with something racist called a 'meme' is even more shock shock

I really don't know what to make of all this.

Skina Sun 25-May-14 10:20:51

Absolutely Special.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:21:25

Alas, I have no bacon. Fishfinger sarnie it is smile

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:22:59

Except no-one actually said that. But that doesn't make the attack justified then does it?

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:23:35

Yes I want a bacon sarnie with brie please agent - very kind.

Fanjo I'm very sorry but if being 'educated' involves joining facebook and finding some racist stupid people to friend so that they can poison my feed (and brain) with islamaphobic wotsits, then thanks but no thanks.

I'm quite fond of my sense of proportion anyhow.

CarolineKnappShappey Sun 25-May-14 10:23:59

I just want to know what the OP cooked last night, and if there have been any more complaints.

smile

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:24:59

Oh major whoops you said other rude posters - I thought that was a strange attack on me blush

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:26:20

I really want to find out what a meme is but i'm scared to google it in case I find loads.

Can anyone tell me?

SpecialAgentFreyPie Sun 25-May-14 10:29:02

A meme is a photograph with writing on it. Usually sarcastic. Like someone walking into a pole and the writing saying something about their strengths as a professional walker. Bad example.... Like the LOLCATS?

starshaker Sun 25-May-14 10:30:25
BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:30:49

Its just a picture with a caption. Some of them are funny or sweet and some are horrible. I just de-friend anyone that posts horrible ones a d block the originator of the meme. The ones about wine are sent to me for some reason? hmm

AlpacaPicnic Sun 25-May-14 10:30:51

A meme is kind of like a catchphrase, but visual, that people sieze on and then share - sometimes waay too much.
A fairly inoffensive one from a few years back was Rick Astley - it was nicknamed Rickrolling and people would send a link to something 'cool that you must check out' and actually it would be a link to 'Never gonna give you up' as a prank. Funny the first few times but pretty harmless overall.

thornrose Sun 25-May-14 10:44:11

Meme - an image, video, piece of text, etc., typically humorous in nature, that is copied and spread rapidly by Internet users, often with slight variations. (I had to google it!)

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:45:47

I see hmm

It sounds as though half the world has a problem with FB friends who turn out to be closet racists/sexists/homophobes. Must be exhausting. I'm glad to be out of it, I'd waste hours wringing my hands over defriending dilemmas involving future weddings and whose Dc are friends with whose <stoopid>

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:46:57

Ooo yes I kow about rickrolling <absurdly pleased> grin

Skina Sun 25-May-14 10:48:12

Or, Fideline, you don't have racist/homophobic/sexist friends in the first place. That works well too.

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 10:48:39

As I said, I thought it was interesting how many people suggested she cooked other pork products to see if that offended him too. I do wonder why that was [disclaimer- I do know that some others suggested smoked haddock]

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:50:42

Well you'd think Skina but I keep hearing people arejust astonished by who is reposting this stuff.

BuzzardBird Sun 25-May-14 10:51:58

Exactly hak. Some posters haven't rtft and are making random assumptions.

Skina Sun 25-May-14 10:54:24

Well quite Fid.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:56:24

Buzz and Hak it's a hell of a stretch to get to where you've got with that.

Rude guy doesn't like the smell of cooked pig (it's about the only thing we know for sure), people are making 'stand up to him' suggestions based on that.

You guys are the ones drawing other conclusions about his aversion to cooked pork/bacon aromas.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:56:31

You'd think folk would quit with the bitching once people have left thread.

Apparently not.

Yes..I who feel strongly opposed to bigotry deliberately pick bigoted friends

Jeeze. Give it a rest please.

FanjoForTheMammaries Sun 25-May-14 10:57:23

Will now hide the thread as opposed to just doing other stuff then checking it later.

SlatternNeedsToCalmDown Sun 25-May-14 10:58:37

Thank you for the explanations of meme, I too didn't want to enquire. I am not a huge FB user although do have an account. I am pleased to say I have not seen any of the anti Muslim or racist memes, thank goodness.

When I read the OP at no stage did I think racism or anything more than - your new neighbour is an entitled idiot and his use of 'just do what I say' language was intimidatory with sexist overtones. I am surprised at the way the thread has gone and would like to wish OP luck in her future neighbour relations.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:58:54

I'm sure your asonishment is not of the faux variety Fanjo

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 10:59:54

(but some people's must be)

SheherazadeSchadenfreude Sun 25-May-14 11:02:30

When I lived in Tel Aviv, I used to buy turkey bacon. Smelled and tasted pretty similar to the real thing.

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 11:03:06

You may not have noticed, but there isn't a single person who has suggested that whatever his motivation he has any right at all to stop the OP cooking whatever she likes?

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 11:05:43

There have been people who have insisted that OP's intent depends on his motivation. I quoted one of them in my post at 10.08 yesterday.

Skina Sun 25-May-14 11:10:09

<sigh>

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 11:12:25

Am I upsetting you * skina*? I'm sorry - have a brew and a cake

MNHQ I think we are going to need a bacon sarnie smilie

Skina Sun 25-May-14 11:13:55

Not at all Fid. And grin at bacon sarnie smiley! <finishes 2nd one of the morning>

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 11:16:31

<completely loses track of who is on which side of which argument> smile

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 11:24:18

But what I am saying is that if this happened as stated, the man concerned was a wassock regardless. His motivation is irrelevant- his behaviour was unacceptable.

AlpacaLypse Sun 25-May-14 11:31:06

Yup - bacon sarnies all round at AlpacaCentral. It would be interesting to see how many regulars who use wine in the evenings would be using [baconbuttie] in the mornings!

And in case anyone's late to thread and wondering what most of the deletions are, the ones I reported yesterday were all the snidey troll hunting remarks.

I've lurked all the way through and the main thing that's become clear is the entirety of MN agree that (a) everyone has the right to cook whatever they like whenever they like and (b) everyone apart from those who for religious, cultural or philosophical reasons don't eat pork, would love a bacon sarnie.

zippey Sun 25-May-14 11:54:36

OP isn't racist. The only ones who are racist on this thread are the ones who have shouted racist at the OP.

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 12:04:59

"OP isn't racist. The only ones who are racist on this thread are the ones who have shouted racist at the OP."

Could you explain this, please? I don't understand.

OwlCapone Sun 25-May-14 12:06:41

Calling someone racist doesn't make you racist. That makes no sense.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 12:23:34

OP isn't racist. The only ones who are racist on this thread are the ones who have shouted racist at the OP.

Well that's an interesting new perspective confused

Skina Sun 25-May-14 12:25:10

I don't think calling the op racist means they are racist exactly. What concerns me on this and many, many other seemingly innocent threads, is the speed at which people read back an op and decide it's racist/homophobic/anti SN/sexist because of they're own deep rooted feelings on a particular matter.

Just because some people hold hideous views on subjects, it does not in any way, mean that everyone does. There was absolutely no need whatsoever for the racist card to be pulled out on this thread. Wanky twat of a neighbour card, yes. But the op was not, in any way, racist.

Skina Sun 25-May-14 12:25:53

They're? Ffs THEIR.

scarffiend Sun 25-May-14 12:30:11

I want to know what OP made for breakfast!

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 12:31:51

I want the OP to come and cook me supper <hopeful>

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 12:38:21

I agree to some extent, skina. But you must admit that the red flags in this one are positively doing the Hokey Cokey! And nobody has yet explained to me why so many suggested cooking other pork dishes to see if he was offended by them as well. Bacon has a very distinctive smell. Why would somebody who didn't like the smell of bacon also not like the smell of pulled pork? hmm

Skina Sun 25-May-14 12:50:29

True enough Hak but the main thing here is that it was NOT the op suggesting these, which brings me to my point of people calling bullshit on the op saying it was a troll.

To be fair, though, cooking pulled pork smells are not a million miles from cooking bacon smells, so that's a fair sub IMO, as is roast pork - particularly the crackling.

And now I wish I'd bought a big joint of pork for lunch instead of rib of beef.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 12:52:23

To be fair, though, cooking pulled pork smells are not a million miles from cooking bacon smells, so that's a fair sub IMO, as is roast pork - particularly the crackling.

I'm glad you said that. I was beginning to think I must have a strange sense of smell smile

Poetnojo Sun 25-May-14 12:56:43

Has morrissey moved in next door to you op? wink

MaryWestmacott Sun 25-May-14 13:12:06

OP - My money is on him being a vegan. I think if he was either Muslim or Jewish, then he wouldn't have moved in on a Friday night.

He could be vegetarian, but in my experience, the really militant about not eating animal products types are more likely to be those who have gone that one step further in self denial and are Vegan. (This is not to say that all vegans are bat shit crazy, I'm sure most are perfectly normal citizens going about their business in stylish fabric shoes, keeping any judging of carnivores safely inside their own heads).

Either way, keep a log and tell your landlord.

I'm with the kegeree suggestion. Stinks your house out too though...

MaryWestmacott Sun 25-May-14 13:14:00

Also, am surprised by the number of comments that suggest he could be: Muslim, Jewish, vegan, vegetarian, on a diet or a wanker - clearly, whatever his reason for not liking the smell of cooking bacon, he is a wanker for rocking up on someone else's doorstep and telling them what to cook in their own home.

Fat atheist carnivores do not have the monopoly on wankers. (although to be fair, I've met quite a few)

HappyDogRedDogToss Sun 25-May-14 13:21:12

The

SlatternNeedsToCalmDown Sun 25-May-14 13:25:21

"Fat atheist carnivores do not have the monopoly on wankers. (although to be fair, I've met quite a few)"

grin

partialderivative Sun 25-May-14 13:47:53

Glad you are moving, as it sounds threatening to me as well.

Do not be intimidated, but equally, do not be provocative.

slithytove Sun 25-May-14 13:48:38

PI'm so surprised by this thread.

I read the OP and assumed a) tosspot b) probably doesn't like the smell because it's very strong and pervasive c) oh goody hopefully lots of crappy neighbour stories to come.

I came back to it, and I really don't understand why anyone assumed that he was of a certain religion. Doesn't that say more about the posters than the OP if they see 'offended by bacon smells' and assume 'Muslim' will follow?

I'm another one who was a bit hmm at the suggestions of cooking pork. Stinky fish yes, because it's stinky. But why would someone who hated the smell of bacon have an issue with other pork products? I've never found pork loin or sausages to be particularly pungent.

Weird weird turn this thread has taken.

I am going to assume I'm lucky in that my brain didn't automatically jump to cries of islamophobia.

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 13:49:21

Actually, it wasn't troll hunting on my part...more of a "watch where this goes" and it did. Instantly. Mnhq read it wrong.

Except that, as this thread has demonstrated, all it takes is one "watch where this goes", from a poster who wants to look cleverer than everyone else because they want to show they're the first ones to detect the racist undertones and potential of the thread, to actually turn the thread into another tedious discussion of bigotry and racism. There has still been no evidence that either the original post or any of the good-faith responses were tainted in any way by Islamophobic or racist attitudes. It was only when people started (subtly, they thought) pointing out that the thread had the potential to ret nasty that it got nasty. Observer effect almost grin

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 13:50:32

Ret = get.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 13:52:10

HappyDog

Was "The" really your whole analysis then? Not a 'hit send too soon' scenario? hmm

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 13:52:55

Actually, I've just noticed that "watch where this goes" and it did. Instantly is almost an admission that that observation caused the thread to go the way it did. Instantly. grinwink

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 13:59:12

The trouble is Corus it is nonsense like this thread that garners votes for UKIP; "Can't even tell an innocent story about a nasty neighbour and a bacon sarnie any more without people screaming racism, grumble, grumble, mutter, mutter"

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 14:03:47

Yep I agree Fideline - I tried to make more or less that point in my post yesterday at 12:32, but it seems a lot of people disagree.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 14:10:09

Depressing. World's gone maaad I tell ya sad

Groovee Sun 25-May-14 14:15:40

I wonder if he will be knocking on your door daily OP regarding your cooking!

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 14:22:22

To be fair, though, in my earlier post, I said "If nobody's mentioned Muslims then implying the OP's post is Islamophobic because it mentions bacon is playing right into the hands of the real Islamophobes." but people have pointed out examples of Islamophobic comments and memes where nobody actually explicitly mentions Islam, but we're all supposed to think it (the "good guy Jew" meme mentioned above, who doesn't tell you not to eat bacon, and the "when in Rome" stuff). So I wasn't broad enough there and thanks to people for pointing out these underhand attacks exist. I still don't see it in the OP though.

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 15:08:20

"True enough Hak but the main thing here is that it was NOT the op suggesting these, which brings me to my point of people calling bullshit on the op saying it was a troll."

No, the OP suggested slow cooked belly of pork in her slow cooker..............hmm

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 15:15:37

Corus you can't compare the OP with a meme in which religion was mentioned though can you?

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 15:17:31

No, I agree, Fideline, I just wanted to correct something I'd said in an earlier post which wasn't right.

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 15:17:52

I do hate it when people underthink things!

I was amused to see that when amumsnet went in time deleting spree this morning, they missed "Is that you, Nigel?" grin

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 15:18:37

Meticulous as ever *Corus& smile

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 15:40:38

Sorry blush

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 15:56:27

No, don't be. It would keep me out of so much trouble if I could be arsed to do the same grin

Skina Sun 25-May-14 16:15:22

I missed that Hak, though in my defence she wasn't the first to say that and similar. I fear you're nitpicking, tbh, my whole point is that I felt the op was in no way offensive. Rather posters leapt on it declaring all sorts..

DownstairsMixUp Sun 25-May-14 16:15:46

What a weird thread. :S It never crossed my mind the OP was racist but then I don't have racist fuckwits on my facebook so don't see these famous memes everybody is talking about. I hate the smell of fish cooking but I wouldn't knock on my neighbours door to tell them! Bacon does have quite a strong smell to be honest. I assumed neighbour was maybe vegan or something. I used to have a friend that was vegan that constantly complained about the smell of cooking meat!

EffectiveCommunication Sun 25-May-14 16:58:45

I am off to make a bacon sarnie, and please can we have a bacon sandwich emotion please?

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 20:27:05

For future reference, the things that set alarm bells ringing for some of us were-
The use of the phrase "he found it offensive". Nobody says this- it's what people who make up stuff about Muslims and how they want to stop British people doing stuff say.

The use of the phrase "What next!" The implication that more of our freedoms might be eroded in the same way.

The implied threat- the unspoken suggestion that he was trying to boss the OP about because she was a woman.

The follow up suggestion that cooking other pork products- rather than other smelly things- would be a good way to wind him up further.

The Case for the Prosecution, M'Lord.

And just to repeat- nobody, but nobody has the right to stop the OP cooking bacon in the privacy of her own home. Even with the window open. And I hope the next person who complains about curry smells remembers that.

<Cheerfully awaits deletion>

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 20:29:14

The alarm bells might have rung for you, but verbalising your suspicions causes a thread that might have turned out to be Islamophobic into a thread that certainly will be derailed into a discussi

CorusKate Sun 25-May-14 20:30:46

Bollocks. Will be derailed into a discussion of Muslims, Islamophobia, PC gorn mad, veiled racism, etc.

FidelineandFumblin Sun 25-May-14 20:32:04

I always refer to 'offensive aromas' emanating from my dogs <shrugs>

Hakluyt Sun 25-May-14 20:46:17

That's why I said that the alarm bells rang for some of us. Not saying whether to was right or wrong to express the concerns- just trying to explain where those concerns came from.

DownstairsMixUp Sun 25-May-14 21:59:11

I agree with fide if I smell fish cooking (blurgh) I find the smell quite offensive, I'd use that term to describe it, actually, even just someone opening a can of tuna near me is just blurgh. When she said "what next!" i just assumed she'd figured she has a weird neighbour and that was suggesting what will he say/do next.

If i were OP i would date the time it happened though incase he turns out to be one of the people that you see on them neighbours from hell programmes.

slithytove Sun 25-May-14 22:04:00

BO is terribly offensive

slithytove Sun 25-May-14 22:07:08

And in fairness, OP made no mention of being female, so that unspoken suggestion wasn't actually in the OP.

Also, OP was not the first to mention other pork products, that came from pp.

unlucky83 Sun 25-May-14 22:23:32

I was a bit hmm by all the mentions of cooking pork - but actually after racist and 'M' word had mentioned people probably did it subconsicously (like the way Derren Brown works ) -
what? bacon? eh - ah yes pork...so pork at the front of peoples minds.
If you thought it was actually a racist thread better to have left until it became apparent (As I'm sure if it was it would have done)
I call smells offensive ...
I have a friend who is a vegetarian - she was coming to my house to drop something off and DP had decided to make roast beef for dinner - the smell hit me as soon as I walked in - so I delivered to my friend cos thought she might find the smell of roast beef 'offensive' ...I actually said 'I thought you might be offended' ...apparently she wouldn't have been...
(BTW she isn't Hindu before anyone jumps on that - just a vegetarian...)

andsmile Sun 25-May-14 23:44:17

hy is it wrong to worry about rights being eroded - in this country and wider EU we have right in law, ok what smells you permit to be leave your home may not be specified but what is wrong with worrying about an erosion of rights.

If any person in this country cannot express a concern over their rights then that is wrong.

Look this OP is goody whether intended or not.

andsmile Sun 25-May-14 23:45:03

fuck <slopes off to get a well earned gin waht do I know look I cant submit a post without typos look>

kinkytoes Mon 26-May-14 07:12:19

Well that's bacon and sex on the list of taboo subjects on MN then.

Shame, two of my favourite things! grin

Poor OP. Hope you don't get any more crap from your neighbour (if you're still reading).

FanjoForTheMammaries Mon 26-May-14 08:22:19

Why is this an 'erosion of OUR rights'?

Hak was spot on.

andsmile Mon 26-May-14 10:52:06

So you cant say 'What next' which implies what Hak said, you cant say anything that maybe seen as complaining about an erossion of rights?

If I want to object to any of my rights being eroded I bloody well will. Dont we have freedom of speech?

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:00:16

"If I want to object to any of my rights being eroded I bloody well will. Dont we have freedom of speech?"

Yes. Absolutely. Go ahead. Which of your rights are being eroded? Object away!

usualsuspectt Mon 26-May-14 11:00:42

lol at 'MN at it's worst'

SetPhasersTaeMalkie Mon 26-May-14 11:01:37

What rights are being eroded?

God, this is a confusing thread.

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis Mon 26-May-14 11:05:15

I skipped a bit since the beginning. So have we decided that the ndn is just a common or garden knob (and a bit creepy)? Malkie,I agree, confusing.

usualsuspectt Mon 26-May-14 11:07:31

Your right to cook bacon is being eroded I think.

gorionine Mon 26-May-14 11:11:04

Wonder if there's some religious reasons why he's anti bacon?
I am a Muslim and wouldn't dream of asking my neighbours not to cook pork. I expect people to respect my believes in MY house but in theirs they do what they want!

Rommell Mon 26-May-14 11:12:15

wear will this madeness from the euorokrauts end??>?!!!11

usualsuspectt Mon 26-May-14 11:14:57

I think some posters are deliberately being a bit dim if they don't get why some posters were a bit hmm about this thread.

Given that MN is full of UKIP astro turfers.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 11:16:08

Fanjo, Hak is only spot on about the paranoid interpretation that certain people are insisting on inflicting on this thread.

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:18:34

Oh, of course they are, usualsuspectt. It's always the same on these "professionally unoffended" threads.

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis Mon 26-May-14 11:19:13

Arf at Rommel.
Yeah, it's a fucking hotbed Usual. wink

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 11:21:16

Malkie it is the proliferation of daftness that makes it confusing unfortunately.

Well of course you don't gorio. Only bullying idiots tell people tell their NDNs what to cook.

usual even if you were correct, and the OP had ill intent (which I don't believe for a second), bayonetting at shadows on the basis that someone mentioned the word 'bacon' helps UKIP's dubious cause rather than hinders it. In what way is that not obvious?

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:24:35

If it was just the mention of the word "bacon" that caused eyebrows to be raised, you would be right,but, as I have pointed out,there is more to it than that.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 11:28:38

All very tenuous Hak

Substitute the word 'haddock' for 'bacon' in the OP and re-read and really where are all the suspicious nuances? Not there, that's where.

Is this a deliberate attempt on your part to do UKIP's work for them? Because quite honestly it matters more today than it did yesterday and you just sound so obtuse.

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:33:11

If I substituted "haddock" it would, for some reason, be much funnier. The "What's Next!!!!!!!" would be particularly entertaining.

Can you honestly, hand on heart, read the OP, and the later post about cooking pork belly in her slow cooker, and not even have the tiniest, winyiest hmm?

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:34:29

"you just sound so obtuse"

Wow. Just wow.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 11:35:14

Can you honestly, hand on heart, read the OP, and the later post about cooking pork belly in her slow cooker, and not even have the tiniest, winyiest hmm?

Yes

DurhamDurham Mon 26-May-14 11:36:02

There was no more to the original post than bacon and some strange behaviour from a neighbour. It only became more than that when people were saying that it must be racist.....why mention bacon or pork products in general if it's not to have a go at Islam.
? Strange reckoning I would suggest. It makes a mockery of what is happening at present. Jumping on every little piece of 'evidence' and coming up with racism does more harm than good.

As I said before just because you want it to be racist does not make it so. What is does do is make Mumsnetters look a little bit strange and more than a little bit paranoid.

gamerchick Mon 26-May-14 11:43:13

Well its not strange to raise an eyebrow if you're always on the lookout but it's dammed weird to carry it on for days and days picking apart every little thing over and over in an attempt to probably convince yourself never mind other people.

There's bugger all there.

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:50:22

"why mention bacon or pork products in general if it's not to have a go at Islam."

Inn't that rather my point?

<confused>

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 11:54:10

hak, Durham was ridiculing that "why mention..." standpoint

DurhamDurham Mon 26-May-14 11:54:54

I was trying ( without success it would seem ) to demonstrate to stupid it is to jump to the conclusion or racism just because bacon had been mentioned. You must see that is a rather huge jump to take? If it makes you feel better pretend the op said fish and not bacon.

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 11:59:07

But I didn't "jump to the conclusion of racism" just because bacon was mentioned. I wondered if there was a sub text to the OP based on several things, which I have outlined.

But hey, why bother actually engaging properly when you can riff on the "you can't even talk about bacon without being called a racist" theme.

ShotgunNotDoingThePans Mon 26-May-14 12:03:33

"why mention bacon or pork products in general if it's not to have a go at Islam."

I mentioned earlier that I had complaints from my ndn about the smell of sausages. I might have posted about it on mn, had I been addicted a regular poster, as I am now.
I might have triggered similar hmm comments and 'watch out, here they come' hints as happened here.
But my ndn was French - a pita on a regular basis - but nothing to do with race or religion - oh Christ, wait .... grin

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 12:04:20

Hak. Bacon is all there is of even potential significance in the OP. Honestly.

Saying 'what next?' is not racist.

Being a female bullied by a male is not racist.

Using the word 'offensive' in relation to olfactory matters is normal usage and in no way racist.

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 12:06:27

<shrugs>

As I said, the professionally unoffended are out in force!

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 12:13:56

This is beyond parody confused

Professionally unoffended!?

Because I can't see something that isn't there?

Skina Mon 26-May-14 12:42:53

Professionally unoffended? Really? Circles innit Fid

This has nothing to do with my not being offended and everything to do with exasperation that no matter the bloody op, someone, somewhere will deliberately find offence however tenuous, if at all, the link.

This happens over and over again from sexism, SN, benefits, racism and homophobia on MN. Hell, I've seen people take offence at toilet/loo, what/pardon ffs. it's loo and what grin

DurhamDurham Mon 26-May-14 12:48:19

Hak at 11.50 you basically admitted that it was the mention of the word bacon that made you 'suspect' racist intentions.

What a very big jump you made in order to connect the two.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 12:54:23

Circles innit Fid

Pfft <gives up>

gorionine Mon 26-May-14 12:58:26

This thread is starting to make me really sad.
OP's intentions might or might not have been an attempt at showing Muslims as unreasonable people who want to impose their views and stop non Muslim leading a normal life; we will never know for sure and that is really not important.
What this thread has managed to do though is put people against each other putting Islam in the middle of it again.
When I posted before, I myself got sucked into it and I really regret it. I could equally have said to op that if someone had told me what to not cook (as opposed to asked kindly and giving reasonable ground), probability is I would have cooked that very thing for days too.
Some people, regardless of their faith or absence of faith, regardless of their upbringing and the country they come from are idiots, do not let that cause a "should be offended/should not be offended rift, it is not worth it and helps no one.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 13:03:00

What this thread has managed to do though is put people against each other putting Islam in the middle of it again.

I'm not sure it has gorio. Some of us have been pretty energetic in resisting attempts to put any religion anywhere near it.

CorusKate Mon 26-May-14 13:03:29

What this thread has managed to do though is put people against each other putting Islam in the middle of it again.

Well said.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 13:04:44

Some people, regardless of their faith or absence of faith, regardless of their upbringing and the country they come from are idiots, do not let that cause a "should be offended/should not be offended rift, it is not worth it and helps no one.

But yes; exactly this.

gorionine Mon 26-May-14 13:16:18

"I'm not sure it has gorio. Some of us have been pretty energetic in resisting attempts to put any religion anywhere near it."

That is true but I have learnt with experience that whatever you say in a thread that ends up turning like this one, is the more you are trying to say it has nothing to do with religion, the more the other party will make it the main issue, very often at the detriment of the people they are intending to "defend".

Hakluyt Mon 26-May-14 13:17:04

"Hak at 11.50 you basically admitted that it was the mention of the word bacon that made you 'suspect' racist intentions."

No I didn't.

My post of 20.27 yesterday pertains.

FidelineandFumblin Mon 26-May-14 13:18:26

Well it's something of a Hobson's choice isn't it?

DurhamDurham Mon 26-May-14 13:37:45

Yes, you did. In answer to my statement you said

"Isn't that rather my point?"

This was I reference to me saying that bacon had been mentioned and so must have had racist overtones...I was being sarcastic but you missed that and agreed with me.

gorionine Mon 26-May-14 13:41:13

Fidel I can see why it could be perceived that way.I just personally think that sometimes there is no point in making a point and to me this instance is one of them. Feel free to make a different choice though, that is what makes MN a place I like to be on because the good bits by far outweighs the sad bits. I Think it is great to offer different perspectives on things but sometimes ,when it does not lead to anyone learning anything (I do not mean by that that 1 opinion should "win"but that both party open their mind a bit it is a bit of waste of a good keyboard.smile.

Strawdolly Mon 26-May-14 13:49:54

But my ndn was French - a pita on a regular basis - but nothing to do with race or religion - oh Christ, wait .... grin

And that got through without anybody raising an eyebrow hmm

slithytove Mon 26-May-14 16:04:32

Did you see my responses to your post yesterday hak because they kind of show that actually, the hidden racism you have identified isn't there. You chose to ignore my reply so I would like to know what you think.

I will reiterate. OP didn't mention their own gender.
OP did not mention (initially) cooking other pork products.
It is your opinion that the word offensive is inappropriate to use when describing smells. Others disagree.

So really, all you have to go on is bacon, which says more about you than it does about the OP if you jump to islamophobia.

Thumbwitch Tue 27-May-14 08:21:39

Well this went sorely tits up, didn't it!

FWIW, the OP reads perfectly straightforwardly to people who aren't looking for subtexts.
• Bacon = strong smell when cooking, could just as easily have been mackerel/kippers
• NDN = male with forceful attitude - yes, some of them are just like that - bullies. SO are some women, but this NDN is a man.
• "offensive" = common term to describe smells that offend the nostrils. I find Lush shops utterly offensive, for e.g., ditto DH's farts.
• "What's next?" = straightforward comment from someone worrying about weirdy neighbour's strange demands - next could have been, for e.g. "don't park there" "don't play tv so loud" "Don't do housework at 8am" "don't hang washing out on Mondays" - do none of you subtext-searchers have any experience of weirdy demanding neighbours? confused

FidelineandFumblin Tue 27-May-14 09:34:57

How about a 'mutually agreed destruction' button whereby if more than 50% of posters think a thread has gone too far awry and press, the thread goes poof?

FidelineandFumblin Tue 27-May-14 09:35:46

Nah scrub that - I've immediately seen the flaw.

There is no answer. It is annoying.

ipswichwitch Tue 27-May-14 09:46:55

Yy to everything that Thumbwitch just said.
Fwiw when I was pregnant my morning sickness was so bad that any number of cooking smells would make me vomit (even now some still make me sick to my stomach). Did I go knock on my neighbours door an demand they stop cooking said offensive (to me) smelling item in a slightly threatening manner? No. Because I am not a twat.

ipswichwitch Tue 27-May-14 09:49:51

Somewhat ironically my neighbours are cooking bacon now.... <feels hungry>

FidelineandFumblin Tue 27-May-14 09:57:21

Speaking of hungry, I can whole-heartedly endorse quietbatpersons's recipe upthread. Really delicious fast supper. And v bacony smile

ipswichwitch Tue 27-May-14 10:15:09

Yes Fideline that's on my "to try" list along with that fabulous sounding banana bread recipe. A supermarket trip is now in order because not only am I now hungry for all things bacony/bananabready I realise I have no ingredients whatsoever.

andsmile Tue 27-May-14 10:21:48

well the bottom line is my neighbours cook curry regulalry and whilst strong doesnt bother me. I cook pork regularly and bacon and sausages. We are friendly. I wouldnt dream of going round to theirs about cooking smells and I wouldnt expect them to knock on my door and complain.

I don't know what political party they vote for or what god they worship or if indeed they do any of these things as it is none of my bloody business tbh. We chat about weather and the parent stuff. Some of use are brown/white and beige grin. There are no ukip posters round here.

This thread is shameful

mathanxiety Tue 27-May-14 16:47:18

Great post by Goldie upthread.

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