Mumsnet Talk

Those of you who would like your DH to get you a card or gift from your DC, is this because you want your DH to thank you for being a good mother to their child, because you want to pretend it's from your DC, because you just want to join in Mother's day or something else?

Also do you expect the whole day to be special or just to get a card and a pressie in the morning and then get on as normal?

This isn't a criticism but a genuine desire to understand because it doesn't feel like that's what the day is about for me.

What is the day about for you op?

I expect a card from DH, pretend its from the toddler, just to acknowledge its Mother's Day really. Then business as usual. DH will be working so maybe me and the boy will go for coffee and cake!

I'm expecting something from dp/ds, because they always get me something (well dp does, ds is 2!). I think its about dp showing appreciation for being a good mother, but haven't really thought about it until now!

I don't expect a huge fuss, but normally get a bit of a lie in which is very nice. What do you feel the day is about?

I'm guessing this is from my thread.

I want one as a keepsake for my first Mother's Day and also recognition of doing a bloody good job so far in this very trying newborn time!

My toddler has made me a card at nursery which I'm looking forward to receiving.

I don't "expect" anything, but it's nice to get a card from the DCs, preferably homemade ie. a big scribble or a handprint.

I usually get a lie in which is IMO the best gift ever! But this year DS is in hospital in isolation and ill be in with him so no lie in, card or family time of any kind - DD is not allowed at the hospital so DH and I will have a 5 minute changeover at sometime.

What's the day about for you, OP?

Ps. I can live without the card and lie-in just in case I sound like an ungrateful cow!

This is my second Mothers Day. Last year I got a card that DH had drawn in a childish style. I don't know if he thought that would be nice or if he did it because he forgot to buy one. I also got a plant (I don't especially like plants). Nothing else special happened. This year I've already had a card that DD made at nursery. Ironically it came with a bag of dirty clothes to wash as she had got paint all over her making it.

It's an excuse for me to persuade my DH to buy me the box set of DVDs I've been after

happy Me too except the dirty clothes in my DD's bag were from a nappy explosion - now that's what being a mum is about

I think it's a way for children to be able to show they appreciate you (as they get older) and when they're young, to plan a card or surprise brekky with DP and have a chance to think consciously about the things their mum does for them. I like it because it's a reminder that they don't take me for granted (which I know anyway but it's nice to be told). It's kind of like valentine's day for kids and their mums. I know mine get very excited about choosing me something special when the school has a mother's day 'surprise' sale. Also a nice excuse to go for a family meal. I am a fan

Trazzletoes I hope your son is OK. It sounds tough.

As to cards, any is fine; sometimes they're home made; one year DP let DCs choose cards in a shop and as they were too young to read I got random cards - they'd liked the picture, and had scribbled out the 'Happy Birthday' or whatever message inside!

I guess for me the day is about doing something to thank my own mum for being my mum and getting a similar thank you from my own DCs in a whatever way they feel is appropriate. That thank you can be a gift, a card, a hug, a lovely comment or perhaps DD1 making an effort to help out a bit more than usual. If they forget that's fine too. I know I'm appreciated because they tell me at other times.

The thing is I want it to come from them, not be about DH going and buying something and telling them to give it to me.

I dreaded Mother's day as a child because I could never do enough to make my mum happy and I really don't want my DC to feel like that.

I totally get lots of the feelings expressed on here and I love CarpeJugulum's stance

Trazzle you most certainly don't sound like an ungrateful cow. I'm sure you'd give anything just to have Sunday at home and both your DCs jumping on you at 6am with a home made card and a hug. May you get a doubly good Mother's day next year because you will soooo have earned it

It's good to hear different views.

Oo Goldm your mum sounds a bit harsh - how could a mum be ungrateful on mothers day? That's just bad manners IMO.

I am sure you and your DCs have a better relationship just from you asking the question.

I got my first Mothers' Day card from my son when he was two and they made one at playgroup. I'm raising him on my own so never got anything before then and have to admit it did make me cry, soppy cow that I am.

Dh takes DS to choose a card and gift. This year he is 2.8 and gets really excited about giving gifts. He came running in on my birthday and loved the experience of me opening the card and present and being pleased. He sort of understood last year and it was a nice moment. This year I also have DS2 who will be 6 days old. I'm not expecting much for him, but knowing my DH he will manage to get him to dribble on a card in a meaningful way.

I don't expect anything. I will get a card ds has made at nursery though and I will treasure it but as for gifts, lunch, etc then no. It is just another day. I don't need a day for dh and ds to make me feel special. They both do that throughout the year and as a surprise which I love. I hate the day being forced. Same as valentines.

Its a chance for dh to make a bit if a fuss about me being a mum I hope and the nursery have made a lovely handprints card that I will be surprised by.

My mum has always thanked me in good grace for anything i've got for her, even the year I dropped orange juice and a croissant on the bed. DB (who still lives with them) has a gift bag to hand over on Sunday from me because we live 200 miles away, had a family get together last weekend and she's coming to us next weekend.

Congratulations Skiing

I'm a single mum to a toddler so I won't be getting anything. DD had fun making cards for her grannies so I suppose I could have got her to do one for me but it would have seemed a little odd.

To us it will just be like any other day, definitely no lie in! The only thing that really bothers me is that it does seem to be a day when mothers get told how well they are doing and how great they are. There is definitely no body that will tell me that

I expect a lie in and the dcs to have been helped to do something by dh. I do the same on Father's Day. I think it's about my family showing some recognition of what I do. When my children were too little to know what it was all about then I did expect Dh to do stuff, because what I do day in day out benefits him too and it's nice and respectful to show some appreciation. I do get where you are coming from, I think, I don't go in for buying stuff for me, more helping me out more.

We also visit my mum and his mum if we are able and do flowers or a small gift for them, they help us out a lot with the kids and are a great support. I don't do much for my dad on Father's Day because he is less active than my mum as a parent and grandparent and he's difficult to buy for!

Tazzle I'll be thinking of you, I hope there is some light at the end of the tunnel for your family soon x

I don't really expect much and I probably won't get much this year as Dh bought me some Godiva chocolates for the kids to give to me last weekend! He'd seen all the fuss and posters in shops and panicked

I'm hoping for a lie in and breakfast in bed. It would be nice to get a gift and im sure both DD and DS will make something at school for me.

A friend of mine lost her DS five years ago this Mothering Sunday it really puts things into perspective so even if I just get a cuddle along with "what's for breakfast mum?" I'm going to be grateful.

I'm a single mum with 2 young children. Usually there is a card or 2 from school/nursery which is lovely and my mum always helps them get me a present. There have been several furtive phone calls and whispering so I know plans are afoot.

At the moment the day is about them as I know they love planning surprises, giving pressies etc. Am looking forward to some funny breakfasts in bed in a few years time.

DukeSilver I'm sure your toddler (and her grannies) think you're doing a fab job even if they can't/don't/won't say it

DH usually takes DD and DS1 to choose something for me, he does the buying but they pick the present. I get a lie in and cup of tea and a bacon sandwich in bed. I usually go and see my Mum, and the past couple of years I have cooked lunch for my Mum and Dad.
Even though I'm 32 my Mum still does a lot for me (babysitting and ferrying me around because I can't drive) and I like to show her how much I appreciate it because she doesn't have to but she still does.

Trazzle what a hard time for you and your family, hope your DS is ok

Yes but goldmanda, dcs can only do that he they are old enough. If you have little kids they don't have the calendar awareness to know without help from school/dp etc that it is mothers day, make or buy something by themselves ornnot wake up mum so she can have a kid in etc.

Perhaps your dcs are older so can do this themselves, for young ones its nice that the other parent helps them

for young ones its nice that the other parent helps them

Of course it is if they are old enough to be aware of what the day is about and DH is helping them, not doing it for them