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husband hit me

(80 Posts)
carasandra Tue 26-Aug-14 01:12:40

My husband punched me in the face tonight
We were arguing about his absence of help around the house
This is the 4/5 th rt time in 15 years
I don't think I have the energy to leave him

IrritatedPartyOf1 Tue 26-Aug-14 01:14:14

Make him leave, call the cops. Stay safe, have you any children?

gamerchick Tue 26-Aug-14 01:15:26

Then ring the police and they'll put him in the cells overnight.

You don't have to put up with that

carasandra Tue 26-Aug-14 01:16:44

He won't leave
No kids
Feel its too late now
It happened 3 hours ago and he's gone to bed
After calling me a fat ugly whore

Fanjango Tue 26-Aug-14 01:16:52

There is NO excuse for violence. Call the police and women's aid. Get help tonight. You deserve better.

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:17:15

Yes go somewhere safe now.

Ideally call the police and they can wait while you pack a bag and take you to a friends or women's refuge if you want.

If you are ok to have husband charged they will take him away for the night at least.

What ever you do get somewhere safe.

Fanjango Tue 26-Aug-14 01:18:01

Helpline.
08082000247

HeartShapedBox Tue 26-Aug-14 01:18:33

echoing previous posters here, phone the police, get away, be safe.

you don't deserve this xx

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:19:11

Call women's aid.

Freephone 24 hr National domestic violence helpline
Run in partnership between Women's Aid and Refuge

PHONE: 0808 2000 247

If you really feel you can't talk -
Email: helpline@womensaid.org.uk*
"Please note we can not respond to emails by telephone as safety may be compromised. If you wish to speak to somebody please call the number above"

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:20:06

Once or 100 times, no excuse.

Take care, hug.

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:21:01

Any friend or good neighbour would take you any time of night.

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:25:49

Call a friend if you can't face leaving or calling women's aid.

If you can't leave can you take blankets, pillows etc, phone, iPad, drink etc into the bathroom and lock the door?

Get in car and drive to your parents?

What ever you do, please just don't do nothing.

You've already taken the first step and reached out on here. That was brave too, you can do this.

carasandra Tue 26-Aug-14 01:30:56

I can't do it
Thanks everyone
Sorry

Fanjango Tue 26-Aug-14 01:33:41

You have nothing to be sorry for. Please ensure you are safe. Think about women's aid. They can help you plan to leave as well as find you a place to go. Take care. When you are ready there is help waiting smile

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:37:06

Yes you can.

Try baby steps at first. If you can't speak to anyone, email the address I gave you above and just tell them what you told us.
They will be there all night to talk to you and offer you advice if you want it. They are professionals and can help you.

They are not going to make you tell them anything you don't want to, they aren't going to track you down.

They will just read your email and reply to you for as long as you want them too.

If you feel like you can you can talk to them. If not why not just start by emailing them the link to this thread.

Just click the + sign and choose email to friend.

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:40:02

You start with just emailing them with Hello.

If you are worried about them seeing your name in your email address or your partner reading your email then just go to hotmail.com and quickly set up a new free web based email address for you. Will only take minutes.

You CAN do this.

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:42:47

You could also try writing it down and giving it to a friend to read if you don't feel you can tell them by talking.

But please try emailing women's aid first, just make contact. If it is just to talk it through with them.

I'm sorry I'm exhausted and need to sleep now, I can't offer much more advice now than I have but will check on you later when baby next feeds.

You can do this. Hugs.

carasandra Tue 26-Aug-14 01:46:38

Thank you
I will b OK

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 01:48:39

Pls pls reach out to someone.

You aren't ok, he hit you. That is NEVER ok.

You deserve better, speaking to someone who knows more about this will show you how you can find the best answer for you.

Pls pls call or email for help.

bunchoffives Tue 26-Aug-14 01:55:03

Are you hurt Cara?

Have you taken some paracetamol?

Dontgotosleep Tue 26-Aug-14 02:15:47

It is NEVER okay for anyone to hit you. You DESERVE better. Call women's aid. This man is WICKED. xx

SomethingVicardThisWayComes Tue 26-Aug-14 02:18:21

hello.
calling 999 is the easy bit. police will come, because its after the event by quite a bit it wil be within the hour. they will wake him, arrest him and remove him.
he will spend a night at the station.
you will be giving him a very important message - that YOU WILL NOT PUT UP WITH VIOLENCE.
police will ask you if you are willing to give a statement. if you are then cps will decide on what next. if you dont cps will still decide but its unlikely to be taken any further unless of serious injury.

but you will be doing both you and him a massive favour if you just pick up the phone and make that 999 call. its never too late.

ccan you do that now? i promise that nothing terrible will come of it. polcing is victim led....it will go however you want it to go.
but just get him out for tonight and let him feel the shame of knowing that others know what he did.

pm me if you need a boost. or advice.

thesortingtwat Tue 26-Aug-14 03:29:57

I am so sorry this happened to you. Is your face ok? Don't forget to take painkillers.
Does anyone in rl know?

ColdCottage Tue 26-Aug-14 03:47:08

Just checking on you.

AcrossthePond55 Tue 26-Aug-14 04:20:01

I'm so sorry you are living with violence. Today you took the first step by posting on MN. If you don't feel strong enough right now to report him, please remember that there are agencies and people who will help you to get away from him, quietly and safely. Please also remember that violence escalates and things will never get better, they will only get worse. For the sake of your own life and the people who love you, you must get out of this relationship.

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