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But you were weaned!!!

(72 Posts)
Darquesse Mon 18-Aug-14 22:09:50

Ds is 25 months, for a couple of months he was down to one feed in the mornings. Then a couple of weeks ago he missed a couple of days.

Great I thought, time to wean. It went well, he didn't complain much, was easily distracted. I felt a little sad but so relieved to finally be at the end of our journey.

Well the last couple of days he has been pretty muck begging for 'malk', 'my malk mummy' snuggling up to my breasts, stroking them and generally trying to sneak them out. If he managed to get a glimpse of nipple he falls upon in open mouthed optimism leaving me to snatch my top up as quick as I can. If I try distraction he punches, slaps, pinches pulls my hair etc.

I was dealing with all of the above but my heart was wrenched when he started his latest attack. Looking at me with big wide sad eyes, mouth open wide like he is parched and pointing in his mouth with a baby bird squeak. Dear lord how can anyone be strong in the face of that.

So we are now feeding again. My will has been quashed. I am going yo be feeding my son into adult hood aren't I.

Please cheer me up with your tails of cheeky feeders or any experience of feeding a teenager older baby

If its any consolation ds1 snuck a quick feed in today while I was feeding ds2 and he's 3.11 hmmsmile. He hasnt had one for 2 or 3 weeks and I was really hoping ti be done by 15 months 24 months 2.5 birth of ds2 preschool 4. We will be done by 4.

Darquesse Mon 18-Aug-14 22:35:18

Ah I feel less alone now, thank you.

Your story sounds so similar to ours. Here it was a few days, 6 weeks, 6 months, one, two....

Mondaybaby Mon 18-Aug-14 22:40:13

I followed the saying, 'don't offer, don't refuse' and my dd stopped when she was 2yrs old. I know she would have gone longer if I had continued to offer and now I kind of wish I had bf for a bit longer.

Nonie241419 Mon 18-Aug-14 22:50:09

My DD's 2.7 and a bf fiend. She loves milk and uses the most wheedling tones and winsome looks to get some as often as possible. Don't offer, don't refuse won't work for her for a long, long time! I've no idea when I'll wean her. I'm a bit fed up tbh, but it would break her heart if I really said no.

TobyLerone Mon 18-Aug-14 22:52:36

Oh, I dread this. DD2 is only 7mo, but already I can't resist her when she insists she needs to feed all bloody night as well as in the day.

LBOCS Mon 18-Aug-14 22:57:35

Ah ha ha. If I'd carried on with 'don't offer, don't refuse', I think DD would be feeding at school. I just went away over high then when I came back I told her that "mummy's milk all gone". I had one 'launch', a couple of sad faces, and she keeps stroking me and saying "mummy boobs" (and it doesn't seem to have cured her of nipple twiddling) but actually it has been ok.

And I absolutely don't miss the night time snuggles. Oh no.

Darquesse Mon 18-Aug-14 22:59:34

We did don't offer, don't recuse for ages but ds took the don't refuse thing too far and was feeding like a new born at 18 months! I got down to one a day through sheer determination although he took it well. Nothing like the angst of the last few days.

Nonnie they are the best little manipulators aren't they.

I gave in with the vauge hope that my milk had dried up or he had forgotten how to latch, nope.

Gpod luck Toby I would offer some advice but I don't have any! I fed on demand for a long time.

Darquesse Mon 18-Aug-14 23:01:53

LBOCS I hats the nipple twiddling, it drives me insane.

I have tried the over night trip, he was fine while I was gone but as soon as I came back we just fell back onto our old routine.

BramwellBrown Mon 18-Aug-14 23:09:18

25 months?! I wish i'd managed to stick to it that long! (sorry not helpful to you at all)

Lovelydiscusfish Mon 18-Aug-14 23:11:34

My dd self-weaned just before she was two, but remains quite fascinated by my boobs - she likes to snuggle up to them whenever she can, and has recently taken to shoving her hand down my top. No attempts to feed, thank goodness.
I just wanted to respond to the part of your post where you mention him punching, slapping, pinching etc - that must be very upsetting and quite difficult to deal with - hope you are ok.

Showy Mon 18-Aug-14 23:14:36

Don't offer, don't refuse never would have worked with dd. She didn't need an offer. I gently guided her into weaning at 3 and a half.

DS is nearly 3 and less reliant on bmilk but still has a feed before bed and sometimes in a morning. He still tries to twiddle if I don't stop him. I absolutely bloody hate the twiddling. I'm happy to continue a bit longer. We'll see where we are in a few months.

EatingMyWords Mon 18-Aug-14 23:18:44

I was sure my boob monster would never wean but he did very gradually at just over 3. He doesn't even remember mummy milk now he's 6!

LetTheRiverAnswer Mon 18-Aug-14 23:37:26

I had several false stops before truly getting the rage getting the determination to stop once and for all at 21 months and 37 months respectively.I'm now getting a bit fed up feeding my 14month old and starting to wonder if I'll get weaning right this time. I still feel clueless about how to do it.

Darquesse Tue 19-Aug-14 15:18:34

Bramwell it was just the path of least resistance to carry on smile

Lovely it is hard and we are trying to change his behavior but he is just so frustrated, he cant understand why I stopped giving him milk.

So it's looking like 3 is the magic number! I haven't known anyone in real life that fed past 6 months and its quite the taboo in my area where breast feeding rates are abysmal.

TinyTear Tue 19-Aug-14 15:25:02

30 months here and I am sooo up for stopping, but she does like it before sleep and most mornings...

I now sometimes tell her one day mummy milk will run out...

SenatusPopulusqueRomanorum Tue 19-Aug-14 15:36:59

DS weaned himself 3 days after his sister was born (he didn't like the taste of the "new milk").

I weaned DD1 on her 3rd birthday. I had introduced the topic a few weeks ahead ("Oh, you'll be all grown up, you won't need Mummy's milk any more..."). It was OK. It gave me a 5-day break from breastfeeding before DD2 was born.

DD2 is 22mo and I am so fed up with the night feeds. Last night she was awake from 3:45 to 6:15, asking for milk.

Darquesse Tue 19-Aug-14 18:49:31

Tiny I say that all the time, he takes no notice at all.

Senatus definitely no more babies over here so that method is out of the window.

I feel for you with the night feeds I am glad we managed to put a stop to those!

ikeaismylocal Tue 19-Aug-14 19:23:18

I weaned my ds at 18 months because I was pregnant and my milk was gone and breastfeeding felt horrible.

Ds didn't feed for 3 weeks and I thought he'd forgotten so I had a bath with him where he very swiftly and stealthily latched on. His approach was flattery, he said "mulk! Mummy mulk! WOW!" so that's it, now he breastfeeds again and I imagine I'll he'll still be feeding when dc2 is born. Luckily my milk came back and breastfeeding feels ok again.

cakesonatrain Tue 19-Aug-14 19:32:52

This is going to be us! DD is only 18mo, but when she wants milk, there is no refusing! Full on screaming "MILK" tantrum at DS's friend's party on Sunday. And we still feed at least once at night, and always BF to sleep at bedtime...

nickelbabe Tue 19-Aug-14 19:37:15

dd is 30 months.

the last day or so, she's had a lot more (mainly at night, but yesterday was feeding during the day without napping)

I'm convinced she's getting her second molars

Darquesse Tue 19-Aug-14 20:15:07

I'm so glad there are others in a similar situation. I had no idea how attached they get to milk, I thought it was just food.

Loving the wow ikea they are easily impressed aren't they.

MehsMum Tue 19-Aug-14 20:24:40

My youngest DC fed once a week for months as a way of killing time when the older ones had a swimming lesson: would crawl into my lap, drag my top up and shout, aged 2. Hardly fed at all otherwise.

But even she packed in it eventually, at about 2 and a half.

MinesAPintOfTea Tue 19-Aug-14 20:37:31

At 18 months I forced bf to only be a bedtime thing (morning, maritime and night). At 27 months we're still going. I'm strict about things like nipple twiddling though "that will break nyeh" and the feeds are getting shorter so I think he'll stop soon sad smile

RubyrooUK Tue 19-Aug-14 20:44:47

This is the thread for me.

Breastfeeding DS2, now 17mo. We had friends over this weekend. He walked up to me at the lunch table and said in a gruff voice: "Mulk now" while tapping my boob knowingly. Everyone laughed.

I'm torn over wanting to stop (have been working full time since he was 6mo old and exhausted from his rampant night feeds) and still loving the experience of being needed so much (DS2 is very independent and bf is the thing I can do for him that is just "our" thing and he adores it).

He still gets hysterical after his bath each night because he is so so desperate to have a feed. So I can't see him self-weaning any time soon.

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