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Bastard pensioner ignoring arses

(59 Posts)
Vacillating Tue 05-Aug-14 22:22:05

My mother, 70+ and doddery with a few health problems tripped in town and went down heavily. She has hurt herself.

She finds getting up from lying down only just possible when in bed and with a help from pillows and well placed furniture so how she got herself up from the floor after landing heavily I don't know. But I know she did because no bastard helped her up or more appropriately kept her still and called an ambulancesad people walked past her, practically over her and no one did a thing. I am so mad, so sad hearing how she feels more vulnerable now ( it isn't even the first time it has happened).

Yeah I know about the bystander effect but honest to fucking god my ancient wobbly mother in her best coat and sensible shoes scrabbling on the floor trying not to cry.


BigcatLittlecat Fri 08-Aug-14 12:02:54

All who walked past were ignorant arses. I do think the majority of people think they would do the right thing.
When my mother fell recently 2 cars stopped and luckily the local GP walked past. Although he got her to get up which is a whole other story. grin

This is awful.

I always stop and help anyone, regardless of where I'm no my way too or who they are (age/sex/condition) I can't stand by and see another life (be it human or animal) suffer.

I would have helped your Mum OP, I would have stayed with her until she was safe at the hospital or with relatives or friends and the I would have called to check a few days later to make sure she was on the mend.

I really hate people sometimes, the selfishness never fails to astound me. sadangry

bleedingheart Fri 08-Aug-14 11:30:31

I'm not as shocked as I would have been until I fainted whilst 8 months pregnant and not one person on the very busy high street stopped to help me.

I've always helped people and seen other people doing the same. It's so callous just to walk 'round someone and leave them there. I couldn't live with myself.

Notso I am astonished people didn't help you, how can someone leave you like that?

OP I hope your mum feels better soon.

RiverTam Fri 08-Aug-14 11:30:15

good gracious, that's awful! Especially the couple who walked right past her shockshockshock??!!! Cunts.

Hope your mum is feeling better. My mum is in her 70s, would hate to think of something like this happening to her (mind you, if she did it where she lives, a load of people from church and a couple of elderly nuns would probably come to her aid grin).

thegreylady Fri 08-Aug-14 11:25:14

It was truly horrible and I know no one who would not have helped.
I wish I had not originally read the thread as "Bastard pensioner, ignoring arses!" Some poor old fogey disregarding bottoms I thought grin

gymboywalton Fri 08-Aug-14 11:21:35

omg-where in the country is this?angry

my mum fell recently and people helped- a couple stopped their car and got her up and drove her home-helped her to the door etc

the idea of her just being ignored is awful-your poor mumsad

YaMasYaDaWithAWigOn Fri 08-Aug-14 11:19:24

This makes me so angry and sad! A few years ago near my old house (it was on a very small street that was used as a shortcut to get to a large Asda), I was just on my way to the shops and there was an older gentleman lying on the floor on the opposite side of the street. His arm was very clearly broken from the position he was in and people were actually standing over him to get pastangry.

I crossed over and called an ambulance for him, he was very drunk but not abusive and I stayed with him until he was off in the ambulance. You could almost see the alcohol fumes coming off him as he was so drunk but still never an excuse to step over rather than help.

Rokerwriter Fri 08-Aug-14 11:09:28

That's horrible to hear, Vacillating and quite shocking - I hope she feels better soon. I feel particularly blessed now that when DH had a cycling accident a few weeks ago and broke his pelvis, people stopped to help him at the side of the road. It was Sunday morning and very quiet, but the first car to see him stopped and then a family cycling by also stopped and between them they called an ambulance and the couple in the car made a special journey back home to put his bike in their garage until I could collect it. I would always stop to help someone who looked like they needed it, and I would like to think it would be a natural reaction - obviously not, though sad

Vacillating Fri 08-Aug-14 11:04:25

Well our kids will be better people for the lessons!

Notso Fri 08-Aug-14 10:59:26

Vacillating it was horrible. It has made me more determined than ever to help other people and teach my children to do the same.
I hope your Mum gets over this and karma catches up with the ignorers.

Vacillating Fri 08-Aug-14 10:46:34

Notso that is awfulsad

speaking to mum more it appears she fell in front of a couple getting out of their car, they got out, walked round her and carried on! It was at the park and ride so presumably they really needed to hit those shops. Grrrr

She feels pretty awful now and I will be happy to see her this weekend - am at other end of the country but heading back tomorrow. Dad is looking after her, in his inimitable style.

I do get that some people won't be sure how to respond but really my children would have done better. It feels a bit like when you start giving your children freedom and cross your fingers it goes ok. It shouldn't feel like that knowing older parents are out and about. We are a family of helpers who have stopped for all sorts of people - if only she had met similar she would feel so much better about it all.

She said straight away had she done it where I live she would have been helped, and she is almost certainly right- she would probably had a team. Where I live people stop when you break down, when you get stuck on ice, when your dog runs off, when your toddler falls but my area is no where near so naice as chester.

Scabetty Thu 07-Aug-14 10:06:04

Arse !!!

Scabetty Thu 07-Aug-14 10:05:41

Jeez Notso, how awful and scary for you. Can't believe nobody stopped, not even the police car : ares wipes.

ChickyEgg Thu 07-Aug-14 09:08:12

I hope your mum is ok Vacillating flowers

I think some people genuinely are self absorbed and don't care but I do wonder if in this day of suing all and sundry some people feel frightened to get involved? i don't know really. It just seems such a shame that if you see someone who needs help, that you can easily step over them....Awful.

Opheliabumps Thu 07-Aug-14 09:01:39

I'm so sorry for your mum and wish I had been in town yesterday, as I would have helped her.

My mum fell outside Tescos recently, and people were lovely, helped her up, called an ambulance and even had her shopping put into the fridge at Tesco until she was home from hospital, so it didn't go off.

I was so touched by what people had done (I live 150 miles away) I used facebook to trace and thank a couple of the people who had helped,

Notso Thu 07-Aug-14 08:59:42

I was walking back from the supermarket with my two youngest in the double buggy and a load of shopping underneath. It was icy and I slipped going down a hill. The buggy fell on top of me with the handle going across my neck.
My boys were screaming and I couldn't lift the buggy enough to get out from under it, because it was so slippy my feet were just sliding around.
I was on a main road right near a layby, cars were driving by with the drivers staring, a police car passed, loads of people were on the other side of the road walking and nobody stopped.
My boys were wriggling so much I thought the weigh on my neck was going to strangle me. Then my 2yo got out of his harness and climbed out the buggy and I was able to get out.

Scabetty Thu 07-Aug-14 08:54:42

This is sad to read. My dad had several falls in his 70s and thankfully someone always brought him home or called an ambulance. DD 13 yo helped an elderly man recently who had fallen but was unhurt. She said another man came and helped get him to his feet also. I hope she continues to stop and not walk past. I hope your mum has a speedy recovery.

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Thu 07-Aug-14 08:45:27

It's just appalling. Even having 2 dcs with me, one who is impatient and a runner and the other that's turning "being 5yo" into a mini mid-life crisis, and I still would stop, ring for help, and stay with them until help arrived. And have done so, when we witnessed a pregnant woman collapsing one day and everyone in the immediate vicinity just stood there and looked at her. (she was fine, by the way)

I think it shows just how insulated people have become - so many just can't be bothered to help others.

fackinell Thu 07-Aug-14 01:14:13

What do you think it is that makes people keep on walking by? Reading this has got me to wondering. I met two guys in London who found a (high profile) murder victim (I'd rather not say who in case any of the woman's family read this.) They went to help but were terrified of being blamed and called the police to say they'd tried to help her up, thinking she was drunk and their prints were on her arms. They stayed with her till the police arrived. They were clearly still distressed about it (one actually burst into tears.) They were terrified they'd done more damage. Maybe this is part of the reason people don't help.

Darkesteyes Thu 07-Aug-14 00:20:37

My best wishes to your mum OP thanks

When I was in my late teens I saw a bloke lying half on half off a bench early one morning. I went over and asked if he was alright Turned out he was just pissed .

But there were 3 fuckers across the road pointing and laughing at me for going over and asking if he was ok.


DogCalledRudis Thu 07-Aug-14 00:04:20

Poor lady.
On the other hand -- i have an elderly neighbour. She is very frail. But when anybody tries to help her (e.g. get on a bus) she starts shouting abuse. She finds it insulting that anybody sees her as "frail".

ColdTeaAgain Wed 06-Aug-14 23:48:28

Hope she makes a speedy recovery OP.

I just cannot understand how this can happen in a busy shopping centre sad that is a lot of people walking by and doing nothing.

Ebayaholic Wed 06-Aug-14 23:27:00

Your last sentence in your op made me well up too. However look at how many people have taken the time on here to wish you and your mum well- have we redressed the balance at all? Please pass all of our good wishes onto your mum and let her know we are thinking of her.

IwishIwasmoreorganised Wed 06-Aug-14 23:13:32

I hope your mum is being well looked after in hospital.

I'm angry that this sort of behaviour seems so common in our society.

I have stopped my car twice to help people. Once a motorcyclist who had come off his bike (turned out he had a spinal injury and was helicoptered to hospital) and once an elderly lady who tripped in the street.

Ask your mums ward about physio for strength and balance retraining and community support to help her get her confidence back to mobilise outdoors.

ShyGirlie Wed 06-Aug-14 23:04:09

thanks for your lovely mum.

I hooe she makes a full recovery soon.

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