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Things you never hear DH/DP say.

(92 Posts)
Kasterborous Fri 13-Jun-14 23:32:01

No I don't want to watch the football /Grand Prix/ baseball.

I love Eastenders.

You can cook the BBQ.

No I don't fancy a beer.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Fri 13-Jun-14 23:48:38

Of course I'll put the kids to bed / read stories / pick the clothes up off the floor / make you a cup of tea, completely unprompted.

WallyBantersJunkBox Fri 13-Jun-14 23:50:43

Shall we spend the weekend choosing some lovely billowing voile curtains for the bedroom?

missingmumxox Fri 13-Jun-14 23:54:30

I shall get on and do that straight away

MamaPain Sat 14-Jun-14 00:05:14

No sex please.

Turn the volume down.

I shall just do this now to get it out of the way/because it's an everyday job instead of waiting until Mama struggles to do it.

(He does love Eastenders though)

TheFantasticMrsFox Sat 14-Jun-14 00:07:19

No, another beer would be foolhardy and we should go home grin

I will do everything that you do and not whine about it

trikken Sat 14-Jun-14 00:09:10

Id love to go to the garden centre with you.

CointreauVersial Sat 14-Jun-14 00:11:32

I know exactly where I left it.

sooperdooper Sat 14-Jun-14 00:11:48

I'll bleach the loo

Superworm Sat 14-Jun-14 00:12:37

I love a trip to ikea.

Let's have your family over.

trikken Sat 14-Jun-14 00:13:20

I'll invite your mother round

MamaPain Sat 14-Jun-14 00:15:14

My keys are in the place they belong.

I gave a lengthly response to the text. It was full of all the relevant details.

scottishmummy Sat 14-Jun-14 00:17:27

Aye,it's nice.i agree you do need another nudish lipstick

YeGodsAndLittleFishes Sat 14-Jun-14 00:18:23

So what did you buy in Hobby Craft?

I do like the colour combination of the blanket you're crocheting, and your crochet is really coming on since last year.

I quite fancy cooking you something really special tonight. I'll go and find a recipe and shop for what I need.

xihha Sat 14-Jun-14 00:21:30

sorry, I was wrong.

scottishmummy Sat 14-Jun-14 00:21:38

A new bag?aye stick it with the others it's lovely
Of course,inability to recall where the fuck I left car keys isn't your fault
Aye,let the weans play with my ipad

Gumblossom Sat 14-Jun-14 00:23:04

I've given up playing Kingdom Age, and this time I won't start it up again.

I've had a really good talk with my Dad and I want to tell you about it...

You sit down and put your feet up, I have got dinner on and I'm just going to finish cleaning the bathroom

Please let me put DS to bed, I would love to read him 4 stories and since three songs while he drifts off.

I agree, it is late, you're tired and we should go home. I don't want another drink or "one for the road", let's go now.

MamaPain Sat 14-Jun-14 00:33:26

You're right, thou can really smell the difference between the two candles and we should definitely buy at least one. Great for the ambience at home.

RedLentil Sat 14-Jun-14 00:35:48

Ah, my mobile is ringing. I'll answer it immediately, and put it back in pocket in such a way that it is guaranteed not to make phantom calls to my darling wife.

Fevertree Sat 14-Jun-14 00:38:19

You have a lay in darling. I will look after the baby.

LettertoHerms Sat 14-Jun-14 00:39:18

Oh, I'd much rather take you out for dinner, drinks, and dancing than stay in and watch hockey.

Yes, I'd love to go to the craft store with you! Take as much time as you need!

Boudica1990 Sat 14-Jun-14 00:48:20

Yes I manhandled (insert item) and broke it, it was all my fault

Cocolepew Sat 14-Jun-14 00:51:38

I think we need more cushions.

enormouse Sat 14-Jun-14 00:57:15

My hair is indeed ridiculous. I should have listened when you said blonde is not my colour.

Nigel Slater is a national treasure. What he says is the complete opposite of pretentious food wankery.

Let's go to ikea.

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