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Not a good start to the weekend

(28 Posts)
AlwaysTakeTheWeatherWithYou Fri 06-Jun-14 19:39:10

Feel free to ignore if you wish, I just want to write this down.

Feels like I'm in a dream, think I'm just shocked.

I was walking home from work today down the canal. The same route I walk everyday with no problems, lots of cyclists and walkers use it.

A man came directly to the side of me and said 'Kiss', I thought I misunderstood what he said, so I said 'pardon?'. He kept saying kiss, so I ignored him and walked on.

He followed me for about 200 metres (I thought he had given up/taken the path back up to the road). He was suddenly behind me saying 'hello, kiss' 'I'm not English, you English?' repeatedly so I asked him politely to leave me alone. This continued for about another 50m at which point I was very firm telling him to leave me alone, that I wasn't interested.

Then he started pulling on my bag and jacket, grabbing my arm. He grabbed my boob once as I was trying to pull away. I really was trying to fight him off but he was very firm. I shouted help twice, but no-one was around.

Luckily then two cyclists came past and helped me get him to walk away. I just burst into tears, it was such a shock what had happened. They were great thanks

I haven't told anyone in real life yet, don't really know what to say and I feel a bit silly, like it's no big deal. Like I put myself in a bad position by walking down the canal on my own, but I really do do that journey all the time.

Hope no one minds me just writing down my thoughts here.

mswibble Fri 06-Jun-14 19:42:18

What an awful thing to happen, no wonder you're feeling shaken up! Its definitely not silly to be upset by this - you're probably in shock with it all.

Phone the police, it sounds like you have been sexually assaulted and they will take it very seriously. Please don't feel that this was your fault at all, you were doing something entirely normal and acceptable and this man decided his need to intimidate and scare you overrode your right to walk home safely.

Something similar (though less aggressive) happened to me and the police were fab. The man was later caught and convicted of a serious of similar attacks.

Marlinspike Fri 06-Jun-14 19:44:24

Oh, that must have been so horrible for you. Please don't think it was in any way your fault. It was not- the tosser who accosted you was completely to blame, and I strongly urge you to report this to the police.

CarCiKoTab Fri 06-Jun-14 19:48:51

Phone the police and give them a full description of the man. You are not being silly that sort of behaviour is unacceptable, you have every right to walk where ever you want without dealing with harassment of any nature. Please report this!

CailinDana Fri 06-Jun-14 19:51:10

That's not nothing! It's a sexual assault. No wonder you feel so awful.

Listen, you absolutely did not "put yourself in a bad position." You exercised your right as a human being to walk where you want to, when you want to. That man is an arsewipe - he was the one in the wrong, not you. You are absolutely not to blame.

Is there anyone you can call just to have a chat with?

HattyMonkey Fri 06-Jun-14 19:53:48

You poor thing, I agree go to the police. They may be able to find the cyclists who helped you and find this man who assaulted you. There is no such thing as putting yourself in a bad position nobody ever ever has the right to touch you without permission.
Please tell a real life friend or family, you are quite likely to be in shock.

Kleptronic Fri 06-Jun-14 19:59:20

You must be in shock, you have been the victim of a sexual assault! Please call the police. No-one has the right to do that to you, no-one, no matter where you are or what you're doing. I'm sorry you have been attacked x

MyGoldenNotebook Fri 06-Jun-14 20:01:07

That's awful. I echo what others are saying about going to the police. This is NOT your fault.c

AlwaysTakeTheWeatherWithYou Fri 06-Jun-14 20:23:57

I'll be honest, I've never phoned the police before. So I take it you mean the non emergency number? What do I say to them - I don't remember much about what he was wearing etc.?

Thank you for replying. Just writing it down has made it seem a little clearer.

stillstandingatthebusstop Fri 06-Jun-14 20:29:27

I would phone 101. It would be really good if you could incase the man attacks someone else. I hope you feel you can. thanksthanks

Phone 111. Say you have been assaulted and want to report it. You will be asked to give some details over the phone to the officer who is manning the line. They will arrange for an officer to visit you at home, and they will take a very detailed statement from you (there might be a bit of a wait). They might want to take your clothes for DNA checking (you'll get them back eventually). They may well ask you to go and look at pictures. They will put you in touch with Victim Support.
The officers investigating my assault phoned me up with updates several times. They were very patient, explained everything.

Sorry 101 - not 111.

Joules68 Fri 06-Jun-14 20:32:10

It could be a teenage girl next if he's not stopped. That's what I'd have in mind if it had been me. Report him op, 101 will help you

Helpys Fri 06-Jun-14 20:33:19

Poor you. Definitely call the police.
flowers and brew
It's not your fault.

sillymillyb Fri 06-Jun-14 20:33:23

Oh sweetheart, In so sorry that happened to you. Like everyone else, I think you need to report this to the police. It was a sexual assault, and they will take it seriously.

Is there someone with you in rl?

TheHouseatWhoCorner Fri 06-Jun-14 20:42:55

I'm not surprised you're feeling shocked. He assaulted you.
You were in no way to blame.
Thank God for the cyclists.
Can you call a friend to come over to sit with you while you call the police.

So sorry this has happened to you, you did all the right things. Please phone 101, the police will take this seriously and will almost certainly send someone round to see you at home and talk about it there. I reported someone for a lesser crime (verbal threatening behaviour) a couple of years ago and they took down everything I had to say and went straight round to give a warning to the man in question.

spiderlight Fri 06-Jun-14 20:50:40

Oh, how scary. Yes, please do report it even if you don't remember all the details. Thank goodness the cyclists came along when they did!

I hope you are okay! That sounds bloody awful, you are right for feeling the way you do! Take a little time out and then ring 101! You might be able to stop it from happening to someone else.

antshouse Fri 06-Jun-14 21:01:08

You must have been so scared.
Please report it, his next target might not be as lucky as you were .

merlehaggard Fri 06-Jun-14 21:01:15

No it's not your fault. Of course it's horrible and scary for you. As others have said, it's a criminal offence and needs reporting. No one will play it down.

Bunbaker Fri 06-Jun-14 21:03:32

Please report this to the police.

Many years ago OH and I went for a walk along the canal one Sunday afternoon. Later on that day a girl was raped near where we had walked. Please, please report this.

AlwaysTakeTheWeatherWithYou Fri 06-Jun-14 22:09:40

Thank you so much everyone.

I have a splitting headache from crying so much, but I have spoken to a friend and am going to report it to the police in the morning. I would hate for someone else to be in the same situation.

antshouse Sat 07-Jun-14 17:48:53

Hope you are ok today.

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