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Got upset putting dd to bed last night, and panicked this morning.

(61 Posts)
McPhee Sun 11-May-14 09:16:44

Last night when I was putting dd to bed, we did the normal routine. Then lots of hugs and kisses, and a quick chat about what we'd done today.

She looked at me and said "bye bye mummy", and I burst in to tears. I kept saying to never say bye, we say night night, see you in the morning. It wobbled me, but I can't rationalise why.

This morning, I woke at 7.20 and dd hadn't woke yet. Normally she's up about 5 am. You can imagine how my heart was beating.

She's had a history of going blue as a baby. I've got a lump in my throat just now.

Just needed to write this somewhere. People in RL will think I'm being ridiculous.

fusspot66 Sun 11-May-14 09:19:02

Not at all silly. Have a cup of tea and give her a cuddle.

PumpkinsMummy Sun 11-May-14 09:19:26

aww that's not ridiculous. When we love something as much as we love our babies, these things can be hard to shake. I take it that you have checked on her and she's ok? Little monkeys, we spend years praying for a lie in then panic when they oversleep. Have a sweet brew.

fusspot66 Sun 11-May-14 09:20:10

Has she heard someone say 'Time for bye byes ? Or read it in a book?

Suddengeekgirl Sun 11-May-14 09:20:11

No more ridiculous than me checking my dc are still breathing when I check on them before I go to bed! blush

Think we all have wobbly moments like that! brew

Isabelleforyourbicycle Sun 11-May-14 09:25:26

As much as I love it when my DD sleeps on past 8 am. If I wake up before her I still have a fleeting moment of fear that something awful has happened.

Comes with loving them so much I guess!

Dancergirl Sun 11-May-14 09:25:31

I completely understand, you're not being ridiculous at all, just a normal mum.

Hope you feel ok today.

McPhee Sun 11-May-14 09:25:49

Thanks. Yes, a mummy's love is a powerful thing. I always check her just after she settles, then a few times after that. In fact I looked in on her at 3 am on my way to the bathroom.

JoandMax Sun 11-May-14 09:27:43

Not ridiculous, just one of those things we sometimes feel as a mother.

I get moments with DS2, he had a tough start and those panicked feelings can sometimes resurface even though I know rationally he is fine!

PourquoiTuGachesTaVie Sun 11-May-14 09:30:56

Dh checked on ds the other night and said he hadn't even moved since we out him to bed. I said "you sure he's still breathing?" I don't know why I said it, but as soon as I had I knew I couldn't let ds sleep alone that night and I brought him into our bed. No rational reason for it other than I needed him next to me because I'd made myself worry thanks to a stupid throwaway comment.

NiceOneCenturion Sun 11-May-14 09:49:11

I told my husband to stop breathing so loudly at 3am as I momentarily had trouble hearing my 4 month old. I then had to go and check my toddler too, and tuck him in, he woke slightly and said "mummy, you're funny". That just about sums it up!

My ds had bronchiolitis as a baby, had to call an ambulance as he struggled to get any air in, he still suffers with wheezing because of it. I get a clutch of panic every time he gets a cold! That kind of thing stays with you, don't be hard on yourself.

Martorana Sun 11-May-14 09:53:16

My 13 year old slept til noon last weekend- I had a sudden panic at about 10.30 and had to check that he was still alive!

iamdivergent Sun 11-May-14 09:56:43

I am the same - you're totally normal - either that or 99% of the population of mums are bonkers wink

McPhee Sun 11-May-14 09:59:23

niceone that's exactly what happened to dd. It's bloody terrifying, and yes that fear hasn't gone here either.

You've all made me feel so much better. Thank you flowers

LoveBeingCantThinkOfAName Sun 11-May-14 10:00:39

Not silly at all

foslady Sun 11-May-14 10:03:13

My PND stemmed from me being scared stiff dd would fall asleep and never wake up again. I only started to get better after her 1st birthday. And every night I have to check she's breathing when I go up
or I can't sleep
ps she's 11 now blush

magicstar1 Sun 11-May-14 10:03:15

My mother sometimes rings me to see if I'm okay, as she has a weird feeling something's wrong....and I'm 39. So don't feel like you're odd at all.

Xihha Sun 11-May-14 10:12:31

not ridiculous at all, when DD started to sleep through (when she was 3 - she's not a great sleeper) I was up half the night checking she was still breathing for weeks before I stopped worrying so much, I still check on her 2 or 3 times a night (shes 5 and a half)

EasterSundaySimmons Sun 11-May-14 10:13:00

How lovely that you love her so much that your emotions overwhelmed you, having feelings is a wonderful thing.

My daughter had hyper plastic teeth and as a result had to be knocked out in Brentwood to have treatment. They were lovely and you said see you soon to your child whilst they were still awake and smiling. Then you met your child in the recovery room so you could be there when they woke up. All went well.

Then we moved to Wales and my daughter had to have a similar thing done. The clinic had a different procedure and you stayed with your child whilst they administered the anaesthetic.

I felt uncomfortable about this, my daughter at ten said she was fine and didn't need me there, but they insisted.

It was absolutely horrible. It's not like watching a child fall asleep, the anaesthetic acted as though her life was being ebbed away. It was a horrible thing to see her go limp and completely unconscious.

As the nurse led me into the corridor to return to the waiting room I was very upset and she patted me on the arm and said that every parent acts the same and I said what a bloody stupid idea then! I can understand the parent being there with a younger child who doesn't want to be on their own but my daughter was ten and perfectly ok at being on her own.

I haven't got that image of her slipping under out of my mind, it was very disturbing.

PunkrockerGirl Sun 11-May-14 10:26:17

Easter I completely understand. When I was doing my nurse training, the one thing that completely freaked me out was watching people "go under" a general anaesthetic. I don't know why, I just found it incredibly upsetting and frightening - and these were people I didn't even know! The thought of it still freaks me out today, many years later. A career in theatres was not for me!

OP you are definitely NBU.

EvaBeaversProtege Sun 11-May-14 10:38:45

I'm on my iPod so can't post a link, but google creepy things kids say and you'll perhaps be a little reassured x

EvaBeaversProtege Sun 11-May-14 10:40:12
Martorana Sun 11-May-14 10:59:47

The anaesthetist warned me that it wasn't like them going to sleep, and I'm so glad he did, because it was shocking enough. I can't imagine what it would have been like if I hadn't been warned........

nousernamesleft Sun 11-May-14 11:11:21

My son has had many general anaesthetics and it never gets easier watching them go under. It's terrifying and I can never relax until he's out.

I check on all of mine whenever I'm up at night, if dd1 hears me she mutters "I'm still alive mum" and you just know she's rolling her eyes at me!

McPhee Sun 11-May-14 17:51:32

Thank you everyone.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

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