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If I was in power I would ban ...

(177 Posts)
onestepbeyond Sat 10-May-14 22:40:00

all fireworks (except maybe on Nov 5th and New Years Eve when at least you are expecting them!).
Some lovely neighbour has decided to let off a whole load (Eurovision related I guess!) and now both dcs are awake, next door's dogs are going balistic and I can hear the baby over the road screaming.
What would you ban?

Feminists

not all of them, just the celery-haters

Noisy heels.

Annunziata Sat 10-May-14 22:42:51

Snapchat and bitchy teenage girls!

CorusKate Sat 10-May-14 22:43:09

People not using the subjunctive mood when appropriate wink

CorusKate Sat 10-May-14 22:43:32

Oh, and cats.

I'd ban intolerance of celery-haters - there'd be Zero Tolerance on intolerance.

onestep, yy, unjustified fireworks that wake sleeping babies are terrible and, I thought, illegal? Not sure. Hope you get your DCs to sleep again quickly.

Wolfiefan Sat 10-May-14 22:46:24

Bloody scooters on the school run.
Celery!
Chinese lantern thingies.
Whining/whinging.
Tantrums.
Tailgating (if you do then your car will explode!)
Rudeness.
Spite.

Wolfiefan Sat 10-May-14 22:47:25

Gosh I'm stroppy tonight. But had to laugh as phone wrote Spot not spite. What has that poor dozy dog ever done to be banned?!
grin

onestepbeyond Sat 10-May-14 22:49:13

CorusKate I'm afraid you've lost me - what is subjunctive mood? Please educate me!!

onestepbeyond Sat 10-May-14 22:51:18

wolfiefan I'm with you on all of those except the celery!!

CorusKate Sat 10-May-14 22:51:57

I was only kidding grin It's where you write "if I were blah blah blah" instead of "if I was blah blah blah" - you can use it when you're talking about something like this, if you want to, but it's not compulsory. I just like it cause it feels kinda transgressive to write "I were" smile

CrystalSkulls Sat 10-May-14 22:52:22

fake tan.

Restaurants calling coleslaw 'slaw'
Everyone jumping on the pulled bandwagon - pulled pork, pulled chicken, pulled ham.
Grrrrrr.

RhondaJean Sat 10-May-14 22:53:47

Corus that's too literate a joke for a Saturday night..l

wine

Oh I see the celery haters are out in force
how predictable
<sigh>
wink

PestoSunnyissimos Sat 10-May-14 22:54:23

Animal cruelty
Spitting
Dog poo on pavements

justmuddlingalong Sat 10-May-14 22:54:57

Sandals that make embarrassing farty noises when you walk.

CorusKate Sat 10-May-14 22:55:43

Celery is so much better if you chop it up into tiny bits and use it as a base for sauces. Eating it raw is just disappointing.

Mint has the pulled obsession just popped up?
I've only just noticed it but I assumed it was one of those things (like everything being "loaded" from phone plans to potato skins) that everyone would tell me had been common usage for decades.
What does it mean anyway? Pulled pork brings to mind a memory of my parents' dog finding a large joint of pork wrapped in film, making a small hole an "pulling" her own sausages grin

<blanks Corus>

pootlebug Sat 10-May-14 22:57:32

Chewing gum

hmc Sat 10-May-14 22:57:45

Eurovision

SteadyEddie Sat 10-May-14 22:58:10

Fruit put in fizzy drinks in bars - yuck.

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