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I am a twat.

(45 Posts)
DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 02:12:21

A guy has been coming into my work for maybe a year now, he works locally but doesn't live here so see him a couple of times a week.

He is always friendly, flirty and jokey with me, and twice recently has asked for my phone number.

both times i said no and made a lame excuse that i'm not allowed to hand it out at work, despite finding him really attractive.

reasons i said no: i have shite self esteem and am easily embarrassed, i thought he could have been taking the piss.

He's still friendly when he comes in but maybe a little leaa cocky, i do make more of an effort to be obvious in the hope he'll bring it up again but i guess i have dented his pride.

should i just come straight out and ask him?
ahoukd i hand him my number and not say anything, then he can use it if he wants to?

i am ridiculous when it comes to things like this- i have zero confidence in myself.

thoughts?

Mojito100 Thu 01-May-14 02:21:19

Go for it. Give him your number.

PassAFist Thu 01-May-14 02:27:46

Slip him your number on a piece of paper. He will think you are breaking the rules for him!!

neiljames77 Thu 01-May-14 02:28:28

Get one of your mates to give him your number. I know it sounds a bit adolescent but who cares? It'll get you the outcome you want. smile

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 02:33:40

I'm still shit scared he's taking the piss....

i think i'll write it down and give it him discreetly.

it's been about two years since i've dated anyone, i also look like shit at work so i have no idea why he'd be attracted to me.

the banter is good though grin

Nandocushion Thu 01-May-14 02:35:21

Ask him for his?

BOFster Thu 01-May-14 02:41:48

I think that at this point, it may be appropriate to recommend the Bend and Snap wink...

neiljames77 Thu 01-May-14 02:44:10

Probably because he DOESN'T think you look like shit.

If you are going to make the move yourself, use this pride -saving line on him;
"If I asked you out for a drink, would you say yes or no?"
It's unlikely he'd say no given what you've said but if he does, just say, "well I won't fucking ask then!!!"

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 02:44:48

I did Nando, my sodding workmate was standing beside me the second time he asked.... i got embarrassed and said no then said "why don't you give me your number".

he said he didn't know it offhand and didn't have his phone on him. not sure if that was just an excuse?

i sound like a bloody teenager hmm

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 02:46:28

PMSL BOF

he has seen me bend... but there was no snap... and i was wearing a grotty navy poloshirt so didn't quite pull of the gorgeous Regina George look haha

GarlicMaybeNot Thu 01-May-14 02:54:04

You want to date a man who doesn't know his own phone number? confused

neiljames77 Thu 01-May-14 02:59:15

I don't know my number though. I never ring it.

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:05:19

i have a shite memory, maybe he does too?

this isn't going to end well is it?

neiljames77 Thu 01-May-14 03:13:24

How will you know if you don't try?

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Thu 01-May-14 03:15:20

He thinks you're attractive.

He's also married.

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:16:34

i won't!

i am working tomorrow, i want to do something about this but i'm stuck in such a rut, i'll talk myself into it tuen all my confidence buggers off when i actually need it.

i'm only 24, i'm not some awful hideous creature but i just can't imagine why he would single me out, i'm pretty dull really

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:16:54

*then

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:18:00

Tortoise How did you come to that conclusion?

neiljames77 Thu 01-May-14 03:22:16

If he doesn't give his landline number or says he hasn't got one, then I agree.

He obviously doesn't think you're dull.

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:24:43

I don't think he'd give his landline out since he stays in temporary accommodation while he is working (seasonal).

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Thu 01-May-14 03:26:06

Because he won't give you his phone number! I don't know my own land line either, but I sure as hell know my own mobile number. He doesn't know either? AND doesn't have his phone? AND he's been in since and hasn't said 'oh, did you still want my number? I wrote it down for you'?

Married.

AdoraBell Thu 01-May-14 03:30:38

Go for it, don't worry about the fact that he didn't remember his number.

I only know mine because everyone here asks and I always have to think about it. Can't recite it in English, has to be Spanish or I just can't say it right. I have no idea what my DH's number is as I never actually dial the number, just choose his name off the list. People think I'm an idiot but it's just the way mobile's have changed the way we do things.

GarlicMaybeNot Thu 01-May-14 03:30:47

Umm, now we've heard that he's away from home & in digs (which appear not to have a phone) I agree with Tortoise.

Married or not, he's sounding like unduly hard work!

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:34:00

I didn't interrogate him about his landline, just assumed that if he has one that there wouldn't be much point in me having it since he is mostly staying down here at the minute... it never actually crossed my mind that it could be any more than just that.... i am probably quite naive though.

I thought maybe i had just dented his pride hy saying no and that's why he's backed off.

There's no way i'd pursue anything with a married man but i don't think i can make that judgement about him just yet? or am i missing the blindingly obvious?

DotToDott Thu 01-May-14 03:36:59

He works at a holiday park, they provide his accommodation while he's here as far as i know. it's not a house/flat so wouldn't have a landline.

in fact i have a house and permanent accomodation and i don't have a landline.

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