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So NOW they tell us, PIL visit imminent

(216 Posts)
DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:20:38

I have known for some time (weeks) that PIL are making a rare visit to the country. This is because they have announced their intention to visit 2 of their grandchildren in Scotland during their stay. MIL last came for one of their weddings 18 months ago. Haven't seen FIL for 4 years as he chose not to travel. They are not old, ill, poor or particularly far away (4 hours). They just enjoy their life in the sun, cheap beer and expat lifestyle too much to bother.
So I got a phone call from FIL ( he never rings) to say the are coming next week and had no where to stay for a week as SIL has someone else staying. Could they come to us? Of course, that's fine but it would have been nice if they'd actually let us know they were coming before that and not as an afterthought after SIL said no. There is only DH and SIL anyway.

They will arrive at an airport an hour away at midnight ( cheapest flight) will need collecting, are complaining about the cost of car hire, but I need my car and will not be running them all over the north of England to visit family as I have STUFF on, because I didn't know when they were coming.
You may say why don't we ring them occasionally? Because they keep moving and changing their phone number and we can never get hold of them.
There are many, many issues which I will need to keep my beak out of and hold my tongue. I am no MIL basher ( I am one myself) but I lost my own mum 3 months ago and it took them over a week after they heard to ring me, then brushed it off with a "it's for the best" and changed the subject.
Plus, this is the woman who stole my 2.5kg Christmas gammon out of my fridge and smuggled it back to Turkey. Along with 2lb of bacon, a large pork pie and some oxtail. AIBU to now be dreading their visit and how do I keep smiling?

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:21:14

Oh, this is chat. Bummer.

YANBU, and I recommend gin, gin and more gin, to get you through the week! And venting on MN.

YoniMatopoeia Mon 28-Apr-14 22:23:58

I would lock up all meat products for a start.

As to how to keep smiling - I am not sure that you should be expected to.

WhoremoaneeGrainger Mon 28-Apr-14 22:23:58

No you are definitely not BU. And get a lock for your fridge.

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 28-Apr-14 22:25:02

Oh no, hasn't this coincided with your veggie week? Shame.

BranchingOut Mon 28-Apr-14 22:25:45

Why can they not hire car from the airport?

ElizabethLemon Mon 28-Apr-14 22:26:30

She stole your ham?! YANBU!

gamerchick Mon 28-Apr-14 22:27:10

Don't buy any meat and have plenty of alcohol..

PeaceLillyDoge Mon 28-Apr-14 22:27:37

They sound delightful. I think you'll need some gin. Good luck!

Copious amounts of well hidden gin, a sudden urge for healthy vegetarian eating and a really busy diary which takes you out of the house as much as is humanly possible. Leave them with some links to car hire companies.

piscivorous Mon 28-Apr-14 22:27:39

Doesn't sound good! Make sure you have everything you need to do planned so you don't get pushed into doing things and can blithely say "Oh sorry MIL, I'd love to take you to xxx but I have to go to yyy"; warn DH so he backs you up

Oh and don't get any expensive food or drink in for them to nick!

Sorry about your Mum too thanks

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:28:27

Car hire is too expensive at the airport. I found a fiesta for £115 a week which I thought was reasonable but they told SIL that the one she found for £97 a week was too much! shock

iklboo Mon 28-Apr-14 22:29:04

Isn't it Meat Free May?

StackALee Mon 28-Apr-14 22:29:23

Forget to collect them from the airport

'oh, was it this week? So so sorry' ...

QOD Mon 28-Apr-14 22:34:26

I remember the meat pinching!lmao - sorry

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:36:40


I mustn't mention the Will

SIL has it, she read it, it is not pretty. MIL is intent on causing ructions with it. If anyone has too much gin it may turn nasty.

TheTerribleBaroness Mon 28-Apr-14 22:40:17

We need to know more about the will.........

They're a ball and ovary ache

Say NO. Stop saying yes when you mean fuck off.

DameFanny Mon 28-Apr-14 22:45:11

<gets comfy with sympathetic expression on face>

So lots of proper Turkish food is gorgeous vegetable stuff - are you getting some in for them?

Re car hire etc, it's not your problem - let them sort it out - if it gets too much then just drive away from them wink

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:45:40

She gave it to SIL and said "You won't like it."

Cue SIL reading it and... Well, not liking it.

It favours one particular GC over the other 5 and it's not a child of mine. I don't care, her money to do as she pleases with, and there maybe nothing at all if PIL drink it all first. But still, very much a slight and very typical of MIL.

ChasedByBees Mon 28-Apr-14 22:46:54

Oh I remember the meat thieves! Yes do tell more about the will. I would be polite but you shouldn't go out of your way anymore than you would for any other guests - resist all hints about your car etc. can't they stay in an airport hotel for the first night? There's no way I'd expect anyone to pick me up at that time of night.

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:47:05

Stop saying yes when you mean fuck off

I love that.

DowntonTrout Mon 28-Apr-14 22:53:41

There are no relatives around here. Which is why they wanted to stay elsewhere. They could get a taxi, get pissed and taxi back to SILs. Now they won't be able to do that. I am not playing chauffeuse ( is that a word?) so the hire car means they can go off visiting, but won't be able to drink. And FIL will get very shirty about that.

But really, you would think you'd let your only son who travels abroad a lot on business, know you were visiting the country, so that he could try and be around. Nope, they're stuck avec moi!

DocDaneeka Mon 28-Apr-14 22:56:03

Don't pick them up. It's their problem.

You are busy

And go vegetarian smile

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