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Things you never hear in a job interview

(30 Posts)
GlitzAndGiggles Fri 31-Jan-14 17:16:55

Lighthearted thread!!!

What things would never be said in an interview? I'll start off...

"I'm only here for the money"

Minnieisthedevilmouse Fri 31-Jan-14 17:20:59

I can't manage money so generally prefer to temp than be perm.

It's so hard to recover after a weekend partying isn't it?

I like my look to be individual and fashion forward and am interested to see how I manage this in a corporate environment.

For a secretary role. All dreadfully true and by same individual. I saw lighthearted but honestly people say the daftest things in reality!

Minnieisthedevilmouse Fri 31-Jan-14 17:21:22

Oh, forgot. Was a bank too.

ShatnersBassoon Fri 31-Jan-14 17:23:31

My biggest weakness? Stealing. Ooh, or recreational drugs, I can't resist them.

ShatnersBassoon Fri 31-Jan-14 17:28:23

How many sick days would I be allowed to take?

PeterParkerSays Fri 31-Jan-14 17:29:56

From my experience of interviewing, you probably want a thread of things that people do say, like the bloke who was asked if he had any questions for us, obviously hadn't thought of anything in advance and came up with the first thing that entered his head: "what's your fire evacuation procedure?"

We did tell him, as I refused to catch my line manager's eye lest we both start laughing - I could see him trying to keep a straight face and not shake with laughter.

Pollydon Fri 31-Jan-14 17:32:06

Once heard in am interview - how many sick days can you take per month ?

ShatnersBassoon Fri 31-Jan-14 17:33:04

I was once asked if I went to church (I was being interviewed). I didn't know what they wanted to hear so I said 'Never during work hours' confused

waceystills Fri 31-Jan-14 17:34:17

I have conducted a lot of interviews over the years and it beggars belief the stuff I heard.

On being asked development areas/weaknesses several have stood out, especially:

"Being told what to do"

"Lateness. It's why I had to leave my last job"

"Cake"

"Ironing"

And my fave "my weakness is I have no weakness.." WTF does that mean?

GlitzAndGiggles Fri 31-Jan-14 17:41:52

I like the sick days one grin

How many cigarette breaks do we get? ( genuinely asked at my work by a man being interviewed!)

WitchWay Fri 31-Jan-14 17:44:42

Are we allowed to photograph our fanjos with the copier?

VivaLeBeaver Fri 31-Jan-14 17:45:17

I was asked in an interview if my partner was ok with me taking a job that included working evenings as I wouldn't be home to cook the tea. hmm

GlitzAndGiggles Fri 31-Jan-14 17:48:04

Viva no way!! shock

AlpacaPicnic Fri 31-Jan-14 17:48:33

Viva - were you applying for a job in 1952?!

mymatemax Fri 31-Jan-14 17:50:08

I've heard your company is shit but the pays OK!

if I don't come to the interview they'll stop my dole money

How long do I have to work before I'm entitled to sick pay?

Chopsypie Fri 31-Jan-14 17:50:27

In response to 'why do you want to work here?' You never hear the very honest 'I don't, but I'm desperate'

Trooperslane Fri 31-Jan-14 17:51:30

Are you married?

Any kids?

<looks at my stomach to check if I'm growing one>

This is true.

My DF was an expert in sexual harassment and discrimination law. He told me to pray a man got offered the job then we'd take them to the cleaners.

grin

AgaPanthers Fri 31-Jan-14 17:52:31

Best I heard was 'so you're a young lady, were you planning on having any kids soon?' (Not direct at me, overheard.)

Polyethyl Fri 31-Jan-14 17:54:45

"Why did you become a surveyor?" "My mum forced me to get a job when I dropped out of school. She arranged a job for me at her friend's surveying office and I hated it."

"This role is for a chartered surveyor, when are you intending to try to get chartered? " "I've failed chartership twice, so I can't be bothered to try again."

Ok. Goodbye.

VivaLeBeaver Fri 31-Jan-14 17:57:02

It was about 1998, 1999.

It was and possibly is about the most "blokey" job its possible to do short of coal mining. I got the job - as a sewerage operative. At the time there was only me and one other female sewerage worker in the country.

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis Fri 31-Jan-14 18:00:56

So what's the corporate attitude to porn at work?
How many single men/women work here?

SundaySimmons Fri 31-Jan-14 18:15:33

I faint a lot.

Said by me, aged 16 when I had the mad idea of changing my mind about college and thought I'd go straight out to work like my friend who was earning good money!

The interview was some kind of aviation firm and seemed like the most boring place on earth. I recall switching off from the old chap who was interviewing me!

I didn't want to hurt his feelings by announcing I didn't want the job and in my inexperience thought it better to deter them so came up with the fainting comment.

I did faint when I was younger but hadn't done for some time and was rather proud at the time of my oscar winning performance of coming over all giddy so that they put me in a paid taxi to send me home rather than I get the bus!

Terribly naughty of me but I was 16! And college was much more fun!

hiddenhome Fri 31-Jan-14 18:45:07

What ya doin' after work? Perhaps we could.....erm.....hook up if ya like wink

GlitzAndGiggles Fri 31-Jan-14 18:50:52

Sunday I've said the same at an interview! Tbf it involved standing in a hot shop all day on minimum pay with a short break and my college tutor got me the interview so I had to go. I didn't get the job btw thank fuck

anothernumberone Fri 31-Jan-14 18:53:19

You have got inverted nipples you will never be able to bf. Admittedly said to me by a doctor but at an army medical by an army medic as part of the interview process. It was such a random thing to say to a 17 year old prospective army officer.

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