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It's a long story. But to cut a long story short basically for some mad inexplicable reason my boys decided to have a water fight and it ended with my five year old in tears and drenched to the skin. Dh was supposed to be out with them but it seems he was joining in as bad as the boys. Anyway I said game over and tried to take the gun off my 8 year old. He squirted me right in the eye. When I got the gun off him he went beserk. I hate violence a nd aggression of any kind. Ds1 went crazy. I managed to get him in the house but he became very aggressive. He put his fists up at me and started punching and thumping me. Dh then picked him up carried him to the dining room and pulled down his jeans and pants and raised his hand to hit him. I shouted at him to stop he didn't so I launched myself at h and thumped h on the back. I feel so ashamed. It made him stop. However long after everything had calmed down it was what I did that the boys keep talking about and h too. My mums taking the boys to school and ds1 keeps saying he's going to tell granny what I did. I did a dreadful thing didn't I?