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I'm so tired.

I had an appointment with a specialist today. after being passed up to somebody higher up 3 times over the last 3 weeks. She sent me straight to A&E with a letter. I sat in A&E for three hours before going to ask if I would be triaged or something, as everyone else had been seen before me. I did this nicely and was embarrassed that they would think I was pushy.

Turns out I should have been seen on arrival but the guy who checked me in had forgotten to inform them I was there. I was then seen by two doctors and a registrar who all did the same examinations, painful internal ones. Then by a consultant who explained they would admit me as they wanted to do an MRI in the morning but they were having arguments about where to put me as I was going to have to be transferred to a different hospital where the particular team I need to see are based.

All this time my DD was with me. It's 10 o clock at night. I have no one to ring to watch her. We have just moved here- no family, no friends, DH went away on business this morning. They said they would arrange social care.

Well, I have been in tears in front of strangers more times than I want to think about today. This is not an emergency, At least not anything that wont wait til tomorrow, i know i need surgery at some point, but i have been passed from pillar to post the last few weeks, and now tonight, they decide it might be urgent. I just had enough and said I would go home and go to the other hospital in the morning for my scan.

I'm tired, in pain and feeling a bit sorry for myself. Nothing will change overnight, I have not put myself in danger, I will see the consultant at the other hospital just as quickly by going there myself in the morning, maybe quicker through A&E than by being admitted and transferred. I just wanted to get it all out how frustrated I am, and scared, in a new city, with a child on my own.

how stressful is there any way DH can come home?

Sorry you're going through this, it sounds an ordeal. I hope tomorrow goes ok for you.

Oh poor you and your dd, what a nightmare! Get some rest and off to the other hospital tomorrow. Be sure to explain fully what happened today.

Oh you poor thing. I can relate to how you are feeling. Whereabouts are you? How old is your dd? Perhaps someone can help, I will if I can, I'm in Leicester.

Don't blame you for being in tears! I hope they get their act together tomorrow and things get moving in the right direction for you.
Take care

Yes he might be able to. Definitely if they operate. It's only that I was expecting a scan, then a consultant appointment in a few days, so by the time I'd sat in A&E for three hours and then seen by the doctors, there was only the emergency team on and they weren't doing scans until tomorrow. So the registrar was not specialised and just wanted to monitor me overnight as while he didn't think it was acute, he didn't want to risk it.

[annoying] for you, but good old NHS.
Good luck tomorrow,

Im I London. But thank you for asking. I have name changed.

I can sort things out given a chance. They just messed up today and everyone got a bit panicky. It doesn't help that they can't access my notes or see my scan from before so they are working blind, whereas I know nothing has changed over the last three weeks so I know I'm not in imminent danger. But they can only go on what they see.

But now I'm home, and DD is in bed, I feel a bit low.

Op I'm in N London if there's anything I can do x

(((HUGS))) for a good outcome tomorrow.

Hi, another Londoner here, willing to help! I have to go to bed now but good luck and feel free to PM me, if I can help, I will.

OP No I don't blame you at all for going home; I think I'd have done the same.

Having said that .. your DP needs to get his shit together and help take care of things and arrangements at home.

And the NHS needs to get your records sorted. Just keep asking calmly tomorrow for them to sort out your notes and make arrangements that are appropriate to your medical needs.

Best of luck

Best of luck for tomorrow. Have been through similar myself and know it is awful. Don't be afraid to ask for information or anything. Often the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

on yours and dd's behalf.

It's disgusting the way NHS is. Ill people waiting hours and hours in a developed country?

All wrong.

Good luck tomorrow.

A bit harsh monty. We are incredibly Lucy to have the nhs. Yes, it doesn't always go to plan as the above poster said but we do have good health care.

Hello, thank you for your messages.

This has been going on for months. But because I moved after t was decided I needed surgery there seems to have been a breakdown in communication between different health authorities.

I registered at a new doctors who referred me for physio to manage the pain. The physio would not touch me because of my symptoms and referred me to a specialist physio, in the meantime I was waiting for a referral to a new consultant. All this time my condition has progressed.

My specialist physio was yesterday and they were concerned enough to send me to A&E. But insisted thati went to a certain hospital, despite my new consultant team being based elsewhere. The doctors I saw yesterday were ringing the other hospital for advice, but due to the time it took to get seen, they were talking to night staff and getting general advice, so wanted to admit me until they could get me seen by the right person.

My DH only left yesterday morning, both of us thinking I was at last going to get some help.because I have been left for three months with no ongoing care, my condition has worsened. We did not expect this.

Also what finished me off last night is that they were arguing about where to put me. The registrar on the spinal ward was refusing to have me as, in their words, "he was not allowed to touch me and i wouldn't be under his care," so he was suggesting I went on a surgical ward overnight, they were full.

At this point I knew they were floundering and covering them selves and at the mention of DD going into social care I told them I was going home.

What a mess. I would have gone home too. I hope the other hospital gives you what you need.

I am so upset and frustrated, I can't believe what has happened today.

I was assessed and put on MAU this morning, saw a consultant neuro, who was very rude and proclaimed he would only treat what he saw on a scan. Scan organised for 3pm he said, cannula in, in case of surgery, nil by mouth etc.

3oclock came and went. I asked if they knew what was happening as I had to make arrangements for DD. A very kind doctor came and apologised but they could not arrange the scan as the neuro had said it was not an emergency (ie operate today) therefore they could not refer me for it today. I would have to ask for urgent (ie within 2 weeks) referral letter from my GP, which he already had in his hand dated 3 weeks ago, plus he had an urgent scan request from senior neuro skeletal dept asking for scan within 48 hours. He was very sorry. Just the system, knew I had been messed about yesterday but let slip that the MRI machine had been out of order at the hospital yesterday- which explained all that.

I have to start it all again tomorrow. I am no nearer any help or a care pathway than I was a month ago. Despite the fact that I am in severe pain, my reflexes and strength may never return, I still can't access physio without an up to date scan and a neurosurgeons opinion, I can't get that opinion without a scan.

I can't believe the utter incompetence, the waste of time and money and the lack of actual care. Thank god it isn't life threatening. Who on earth can I even start to complain to?

You can complain directly to the Chief Executive of the Hospital Trust and PALS - available via the hospital's website.

Also you could ring tomorrow and ask to put a call in to yourt GP to let them know what's going on, and see how they can help.

Really sorry, OP - it sounds just awful.

Sorry you're going through this, know how hopeless and frustrating it can feel as going through similar ridiculous processes for husband, sigh....

I second PALS, they usually have an office within the hospital do go in if time and vent and chat with them. They'll log your complaint, follow up where they can and feedback to you. They helped sort some rubbish out where our letter told us to go to a completely different hospital for a pre op, got there only to be told it wasn't there but a different hospital, when rearranging the pre op they tried to treat us as though we'd missed it on purpose and put us at the back of the queue! PALS lady sorted them out so were seen later that week.

Please speak to PALS, so sorry you are going through this. My best friend has had her hysterectomy canceled twice and looks like it will be canceled again The NHS can be spectacularly good or bad just depends on what day of the week it is it seems!

Oh my word that is just so bad. What appalling 'care' and non- treatment. Do speak to PALS. Let us know how you get on.