Mumsnet Talk

Have been a lurker for a while, but first time poster so bear with me!
OK. I think I am a little bit in love with my brother's best friend (well aware this makes me sound like a teenager - I'm 37 )

Basically, had a horrible divorce last year, everything was sorted just before Christmas. Think my family are a bit worried about me as I keep getting invites to see them, so last week travelled all the way to Scotland with DD on my own for the first time to see my brother.
And I don't know if it's because I'm newly single or what, but I just suddenly fell for his best mate (They've been best mates for years - I don't know him too well but the fact that he is my brother's best friend means he is automatically lovely!) SIL in law tells me that he's always had a thing for me, he was really attentive all the time we were there.

We're going back up at Easter, and my friends are telling me to go for it, but all I can think of is what would happen if it went wrong, would it ruin the relationship with my brother. Just in such a quandary.

And thinking also that at 37 I should not get crushes on my big brother's friends

Ah go for it! It sounds like he likes you too. I'm sure it wouldn't affect your relationship with your brother, he wants you to be happy, no?

Email, text, do it! Life's too short to not take chances, if he's not the one, so what? Then at least you'll know. What if he is?

Agree, life is too short not to explore further but take it slowly

If you are both single then why not? what have you got to lose?

dont get too far ahead of yourself. Thin one day at a time and all that, so far nothing has happened and it may well stay that way BUT maybe not, time and fate will tell. Dont worry about it, just enjoy it!!

Just go for it, get to know him, see if he likes you.

Yes if you did have a relationship and then you split up it would impact on his friendship with your brother, but it wouldn't necessarily mean the end of their friendship.

It's worth the risk I think.

Another vote to go for it! Will be watching for updates at Easter!

Oh gosh, didn't expect everyone to say go for it! Got butterflies now.
I've just realised that I haven't been on a date for years and years, let alone done the 'letting them know you're interested' thing.
Oh bugger.

Should I wait till Easter. It's his birthday next week, I could send him a card and say 'looking forward to seeing you at Easter' or is that just desperate sounding. Will have to get his address off SIL which will delight her!

Card sounds lovely

Yay send the card!

I'm with the others here knifty. No reason not to and every reason to test the waters. Fingers x'd.

Oh yes, if you're both single and both interested where's the harm in looking to see where this could go?

The card sounds great.

I had a 3 year relationship with my brothers friend, many moons ago. The relationship ended but my relationship with my brother was unaffected and he remained friends with his mate till he left for pastures new years later.
Go for it. Just don't involve your brother if things get difficult, that way he will not feel honour bound to side with you over his friend. Have fun!!

A potiential romance yes send a card, but don't write all your contact details in it and times you are available

Yes send the card! How exciting.

Send the card! How exciting.
don't forget to tell us if you get a response!

Oh I love a good romance! Send him the card and tell us how it all goes x

Right, have made the card. Will post it later and let you all know what (if anything!) happens. Thank you all for making me take a positive step!

Good for you!

Yay!

Wish I had a big brother with lovely friends instead of a little brother who hangs out with weirdos

Really glad you've gone for it. You'd have kicked yourself if you hadn't I think. Good luck.

Ooo how exciting.go for it.my husband left me 4 yrs ago after 13 yrs together, so the whole dating thing was daunting.after several dodgy dates with dodgy men I found my soulmate.and three years on we are married with a lovely baby boy.its better if somebody knows this guy and can vouch for him so to speak, because there are some real loonies out there.keep us all updated.im marking my place.

yay! I hope it goes well. Let us know.

Shamelessly marking my place, go for it!

I've done it - card posted. Eek!