Mumsnet Talk

Two things:

When changing a boy's nappy, delicately place a tissue over the willy whilst dealing with the hindquarters. If he decides to have a pee while you are cleaning him up, this will give you that vital extra second to clamp something over it. An essential tip in my opinion which saved me from numerous soakings.

Have a lot of cuddles while you can. In the blink of an eye they will be a grumpy teen and you will be yearning for a warm little lump on your shoulder.

Just when you think you have everything under control someone moves the goalposts.

Even though others seem to find it easy to join the mother and baby circuit and throw themselves into groups and coffee mornings it's ok just to make a few good friends that you enjoy spending time with and have something in common with.

Feeling guilty is probably very normal but not very helpful.

My due date is tomorrow, am furiously making notes

Don't ever get cream carpets or a fabric couch

And dunk them in water and get their faces wet as early in life as possible so not to try deal with an older child who won't let you wet their head and hates water.

Buy an insulated travel mug or you will never, ever finish a hot cup of tea.

Put a little basket of nappy changing stuff in each room (nappies, wipes, nappy bags, sudocrem, spare baby gro, bib etc) in each room, so you will always have everything to hand.

Pay someone to do your ironing.

I'm not getting teary-eyed and wistful at this thread, ok? I have something in my eye.

<sniff>

Every morning make a some sandwiches and keep them in the fridge, to snack on during the day.

A slow cooker is your friend

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Choose your battles.

Enjoy the little things in life because one day you will look back and realise they were the big things.

Don't lose sight of yourself or your partner, you were there before the baby came.

You don't need to be your child's best friend - they will have friends their own age for that. You are their parent.

Enjoy it. Parenthood is relentless, tiring, boring and frustrating. It is also amazing, rewarding, incredible and joyous.

DO NOT BUY A GRO BAG EGG THERMOMETER!!!!

You will live and die by that fecking egg, despite being perfectly able pre-purchase to walk in a room and judge it too hot or too cold.

Don't compare ever especially with parents of children the same age.

You can't fuck it up in the first year, as long as your child is safe, loved and fed you'll get there.

Go to bed before 9 at least once a week, even if you don't think you're tired!

How you feed your baby is nobody's business but your own.

You will not believe how much you bleed after birth...or for how long. Buy disposable knickers!

As I read on here once : the days are long but the years are short.

My former Boss gave me a lovely bit of advice before I left to start my parental leave.

She told me that everyone will want a piece of the new baby and that I should share him around. Share the joy around and people will pitch in and help you when you need support.

She was right and the pay off is loads of willing baby sitters and some very loved children.