The worst present you have ever received at Christmas

(84 Posts)
marriedinwhiteisback Thu 10-Oct-13 20:34:39

Prompted by the Christmas wish list:

What was your worst Xmas Present
From whom; and
Why

Mine was a knit your own acrylic tank top and a pair of fake patent mule slippers from M&S - I was 24 (a very long time ago)

From my mum

And awful because she is incredibly stylish and it summed up her opinion of me as a mousey, boring, frump. sad.

LtEveDallas Thu 10-Oct-13 20:37:19

Saucepans.

From DH.

3 years ago.

I nearly decapitated him.

omletta Thu 10-Oct-13 20:38:34

A Dyson

From MIL

MrsDavidBowie Thu 10-Oct-13 20:40:58

A used candle from my MIL.

kiwidreamer Thu 10-Oct-13 20:42:11

Last year from my mum, Robert Dyas table mats, in a blue rose faux stained glass type design... I did really want new table mats but gosh these are ugly --and the buggers at RD wouldn't take them back without the receipt--

Pancakeflipper Thu 10-Oct-13 20:42:47

A half used bottle of moisturiser from my Aunt. Posh but half empty.

CMOTDibbler Thu 10-Oct-13 20:45:47

A bottle of dip from sil and bil. Between dh and me, and I couldn't eat it as it contained something I'm allergic to.

The year after it was a £2.99 peach coloured candle.

And no, no agreement on buying token presents

ChubbyKitty Thu 10-Oct-13 20:47:36

Fuschia hair dye.

I had blue hair..and I'm allergic to that particular brand.

Where is the lovely mumsnetter with the 8 yards of knicker elastic?

She always wins this outright

BeaLola Thu 10-Oct-13 20:50:56

A bottle of whisky from my PIL that when I took it out from its cannister was only half full ...

DontCallMeDaughter Thu 10-Oct-13 20:51:05

My granny gave me a pair of washing up gloves once... They didn't even fit... All my siblings and cousins got a bar of chocolate and a tenner.

I was about 10...

rainbowfeet Thu 10-Oct-13 20:52:05

I'd been dating my exh for 6 months & his mum got me that Christmas a Bride. & Groom teddy bear pair that were on a stand that played the wedding march!! .... I think she obviously saw me as daughter in law material !! shock

Bragadocia Thu 10-Oct-13 20:55:04

An electric blanket. It was my main present, from my parents, and I'd saved unwrapping it 'til the end, because I was expecting something else (i forget what). I was scared of them, because there used to be campaigns about people being burnt to death as they slept, having forgotten to turn them off.

I was about nine. I didn't what to seem ungrateful, but I remember silent tears of disappointment.

Needless to say, it was never used.

artyanklet Thu 10-Oct-13 20:58:39

From my Mum - a box of tights and a fluffy green frog note pad (it was dire) for some strange reason my Mum thought I liked frogs!

Talkinpeace Thu 10-Oct-13 21:02:02

An embroidered apron rather like this ....
thinkingthreads.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/img_6153.jpg
when I was a 23 year old festival goer

either that or a set of books I already owned but that had been stored at the gifters house

or the little cushion that fitted no chair at all

or the crockery that had been left to me a year before

and many more
all from the same person

LadyMaryQuiteContrary Thu 10-Oct-13 21:02:28

A pair of (unmatching) pillow cases. The same person sent us a packet of biscuits to share the following year. There was 7 of us at the time. confused. Tis the thought that counts, right?

VikingLady Thu 10-Oct-13 21:06:53

DH once got a pair of M&S jeans in the wrong size from the factory shop, a free umbrella, sellotape, and one walking pole from PIL . The jeans were coincidentally in FIL's size so he took them himself, they "borrowed" the umbrella to walk to the car with on the way home and never returned it, the walking pole was tiny (DH is tall) and they need to be in pairs anyway, plus he doesn't hike (bad knees).

Still using the sellotape though grin

jenniferalisonphillipasue Thu 10-Oct-13 21:09:19

A leather bomber jacket.

I was 12 and had been going on and on about a computer. My mother had hinted that I was getting it. I will never forget opening my present and being unable to contain my absolute horror. I still feel a little guilty but I also think that there was so little thought into my actual present that she did deserve it. It was hideous but it cost £300 so pretty much the same as any computer I would have wanted. She is still crap at presents.

A mini fire extinguisher from my H.

He became my ex-H 4 days later. Not entirely unrelated.

LadyMaryQuiteContrary Thu 10-Oct-13 21:10:22

Some people need to stick to giving gift vouchers. grin

JiltedJohnsJulie Thu 10-Oct-13 21:11:41

Think I must have been lucky over the years. My worst was a leopard print thong that I unwrapped in front of my Dps and DGPs, embarrassed doesn't come into it, I was about 12 at the time and it was from my cousins new wife.

My DAuntie once gave a cousin a raw chicken in a carrier bag...

My first Christmas with my boyfriend, I bought him a Kindle. He bought me garish fleece PJ bottoms and a hat shaped like a panda. I was devastated - not because I wanted something expensive but because it felt to me like he was saying we were a joke because he bought me a joke present.

It turns out he did it because he didn't want me to realise he was going to propose to me once we got back to his home country. Now we're married!

normaleggy Thu 10-Oct-13 21:28:12

You say that ladymary but a few years ago my now (thankfully) exh gave me £100 of Tesco vouchers. I did not appreciate these particularly. Even less so when I discovered the receipt for a silver necklace in his wallet a few days later for his OW...

starfishmummy Thu 10-Oct-13 21:31:31

Mil likes to waste her money buy "Joke" presents - she loves Hawkins Bazaar. One wear she gave us a bottle of wine trussed up in one of those puzzle things that you have to solve in order to open the bottle. After opening the present I put it down; DS picked it up to look and the puzzle bit just fell off!
Thing is what do you do with it afterwards (and they are not cheap she could have given us more wine!!)

Puffykins Thu 10-Oct-13 21:34:24

Aged 14, a skinny size 8 with a totally flat stomach, I was the recipient of a pair of size 16 stomach control knickers from my Grandmother. Pre -worn. She didn't find them comfortable herself, but thought they might be more hygienic than the thongs she suspected me of wearing. She explained this in front of the ENTIRE family.

princesscupcakemummyb Thu 10-Oct-13 21:37:15

a perfume set which i allways buy myself with the general shopping last year from dh super unimpressed but now i never think of xmas as for me or dh just think of the kids

FreeWee Thu 10-Oct-13 21:41:59

Every year my aunt gives us a can of deicer. Even my sister who could neither drive nor owned a car grin Fortunately she can now drive or what would she have done with all that de-icer?

alliwantis Thu 10-Oct-13 21:43:26

Omg this thread is the one that has prompted me to become a proper mumsnet'er and not a lurker! My dad's wife (yep, not comfortable with step mum) has a habit of buying gifts so awful (I don't wish to sound ungrateful) that a new Christmas tradition of ours is to leave their gifts unopened til Boxing Day when we have our best friends over and we open them in front of them so they can 'enjoy' them too. They range from knock off perfume that gives rashes, out of date chocolates to tattered second hand clothes that are truly, truly worn. My worst but best gift was a glass cake plate and knife that came in the most godawful box held together with duct tape but I use all the time for my cakes!

FreeWee Thu 10-Oct-13 21:45:38

Oh I forgot the year my FIL spent more on his dogs' presents than mine confused I know this because he asked me to go and get some of the presents for them and I knew how much what I asked for cost! Not that I'm materialistic or anything!

2kidsintow Thu 10-Oct-13 21:49:18

I had to struggle not to cry one year due to what DH gave me.
He'd clearly gone 'oh shit, it's Christmas next week' one night and gone to....

Halfords.

I had a car alarm. And a thing that you stick on your visor to put your CDs etc in.
I'd have loved a car CD player, but the alarm made me sad

He's improved since then - mostly due to the opening of a handy shopping centre nearby, then by him taking to shopping online at amazon etc.

Although last Christmas he did buy me a camera to mount in the windscreen of my car to record my journeys. His own one was his favourite new toy since someone ploughed into him and claimed it was DH's fault.

Still hasn't been fitted though. It was £££ and he's not impressed.

He's already bought me a nice coat this year, so I shall remind him of that when he's thinking of gifts as I'd rather he claimed that as Christmas present that bought me something crap.

gail734 Thu 10-Oct-13 21:49:23

Last year my MIL gave me a little heart-shaped trinket box. She had obviously forgotten that I had given it to HER several years earlier! It was half of a set, with a little matching photo frame, which she uses. Also, an ex boyfriend who gave me a Lionel Ritchie CD. Just totally random.

topbannana Thu 10-Oct-13 22:03:50

Well a non present first..... I always wanted a dog, I asked every year, Christmas, birthday etc, a puppy was always there on the top of my list from the age of about 4.
Fast forward to Christmas Eve when I was about 13 and I was trying to trick my parents into telling me what they had got me. My oh so fucking funny wankstain of a father piped up with "you wouldn't believe how hard it was to get that puppy in the box"
I truly believed I was finally going to get one and when I predictably didn't I was absolutely gutted sad
Then there was the year I learnt to windsurf. Christmas Day arrived to find a large flat package on my pile which I deduced could only be a windsurf board. I opened all my other gifts first then nonchalantly turned to the big one, only to discover it was a head board for my bed (that I hadn't even realised I needed) hmm

SugarHut Thu 10-Oct-13 23:21:13

I dated a guy briefly over last Christmas whilst on a break from DP. He gave me a stocking and in the hustle as guests arrived early I lobbed it under the tree to open with other presents when everyone had settled. The bastard did not tell me it was a "saucy" stocking, and I opened what felt like some kind of perfume bottle, I sat in front of everyone holding "Booty Relax Anal Lube." I chucked it behind the sofa quickly, but everyone saw. Including my 78yr old grandmother: "What was that dear??!" "Bodyscrub Nanny!!!" He was killing himself in silent laughter.

When I was 11, RSPB membership from my Grandparents.

2anddone Thu 10-Oct-13 23:44:19

Shoelaces from my Aunt in New Zealand. I was 9 years old and they were bright coloured with kiwi birds all over them! They were also the longest shoe laces in the world I couldn't use them as they trailed on the floor!!

CoconutRing Thu 10-Oct-13 23:53:48

My ex-SIL gave me a used M&S £25 gift card. When I tried to purchase a top, the rather embarrassed young lady on the till had to explain that the card had no money on it.

Flumpyflumps Thu 10-Oct-13 23:59:21

An ironing board.
With cover.
Enough said.

mumtoone1 Fri 11-Oct-13 06:25:12

A bottle of baileys from my db & sil with a use by date of 2 years previous..

Coconut that's brilliant! Not for you, obviously, but a genius way of not buying a present for someone.

RalphGnu Fri 11-Oct-13 09:12:45

DP's grandparents brought a present round for us about a month before Christmas so we kept it put away and then under the tree. While trying to find the source of a god-awful smell we realised it was coming from the wrapped gift.

It was a cheeseboard. Camembert, stilton and brie had formed a lovely 'juice' that seeped onto our carpet. I will never forget the smell.

Whereisegg Fri 11-Oct-13 09:38:15

A meat thermometer from fil.
He also bought me luggage scales once despite knowing we couldn't afford a holiday.
There was a tiny part of me that thought he was going to offer some cash for a bargain last minute break somewhere, but no grin

buttercrumble Fri 11-Oct-13 09:40:44

A box of after eight mints, a £1 scarf which she boasted about how cheap it cost all day and a porcelain jug. All from MIL angry

MarjorieAntrobus Fri 11-Oct-13 09:50:03

Yup, my late MIL used to give me a box of after eights for Christmas. Such a "non-present" that actually nothing would have been better, I used to think.

MrsHoratioNelson Fri 11-Oct-13 09:52:02

Mine all come from, you've guessed it, MIL.

Placemats with a line drawing of DH's old school on them (yes, they were for me, not him), a god awful gold lamé handbag from Tesco, a chipped bowl retrieved from her loft "to match the kitchen" (wrong shade of green) and a vase and some sort of pot with a lid "to match the bathroom" (we'd just moved in and hadn't decided on the colour scheme). These last two were retrieved from DH's grandma's house when she had died, 9 moths previously confused.

In relation to her own presents MIL is an odd mix of demanding and ungrateful. I've never heard her actually say thank you for the expensive gifts she had specifically requested. One year, she insisted she wanted a metal detector from FIL and then refused to use it "in case someone saw her"...

LadyBigtoes Fri 11-Oct-13 10:04:20

I would be ok with the after eights! I would rather have something small and edible than things like scarves and vases i dont like - doesn't add to clutter, dont have to asked why if I wear/use it for the next 10 years when I have furtively given it to oxfam, etc.

Worst present ever was an owl made of bread. Not edible bread, it was one of those varnished bread sculptures. Omg, it was hideous. I was a teenager and it was from this bloke my mum was having a post-divorce fling with. Perfect storm of embarrassment.

LadyMedea Fri 11-Oct-13 10:05:08

Tesco value cheese from BiL...

My DH got me absolutely nothing last year. The idiot!

Getting nothing for Christmas is pretty depressing. Luckily (anticipating his cheapness) I took the kids to the shops so that they could choose me presents, which meant that I didn't sit there utterly presentless on Christmas morning (and because I want them to grow up to be decent gift givers). DS1 put lots of thought into his presents and even insisted on paying with money from his own bank account, which was very sweet.

fancyanother Fri 11-Oct-13 10:15:19

My MIL once gave my DH ( her son, obviously) a plate of dried fruits and chocolate covered nuts, two things he has hated since childhood! She got me some quite nice presents!!!

Indith Fri 11-Oct-13 10:31:19

I got a jam pan from MIL once. I can't actually remember if it was for Christmas or birthday.

Jam pan not too bad a present. I don't really make jam but tbf to MIL I do make syrups and cordials and stuff.

However it was accompanied by telling me how she had originally bought it for her stepson's girlfriend but they had split up and she didn't know what else to do with it grin.

A rose scented soap/lotion combo when I was a teenager, with the tombola sticker still attached grin

SunshineMMum Fri 11-Oct-13 11:34:44

A lady shave from my first serious boyfriend. No teenager wants to be thought of as hairy!

PortBlacksandByBroomstick Fri 11-Oct-13 11:38:04

A paper advent calendar - opened it on Christmas morning confused

WhatWouldCaitlinDo Fri 11-Oct-13 12:01:11

Remote control tanks. Seriously. They shot little BBs and everything.

From the man who is now DH. He did do much better in subsequent Christmases.

psychomum5 Fri 11-Oct-13 12:06:00

I have mentioned this before on MN, but one year I was given a second hand toiletry bag filled with NHS sanitary towels....from my mother (she is ill, so can be excused) and opened it in front of my in-laws <oh the remembered shame>

It is forever mentioned at christmas and is getting quite legend now.

DH bought me a pancake mix one year shock It was a 'luxury' one from a posh retro shop, but still a pancake mix. I left it until it went out of date then threw it away on principle grin

Sukebind Fri 11-Oct-13 13:44:16

Last year my PIL gave me a frog house. I think it would have been an OK present (especially as it was a last minute one due to complicated present mix up involving Amazon shopping baskets which almost resulted in me getting 3 hair straighteners) except I loathe frogs. One got stuck in the living room this summer and I thought it was dead and I was physically sick. I was shaking until my husband dragged himself out of bed to investigate. (It wasn't dead.)

My husband's Nana gave me some truly hideous 'knitted-effect' slippers/boots/socks hybrid. I thanked her profusely by letter because they were very well meant. I then took them to the annual present swop at a mum's group I go to (we try to bring a mixture of nice and awful 'less-nice' presents otherwise the game doesn't work) and the poor lady who got them was really fed-up and took them straight to a car boot sale. I felt very guilty and couldn't bring myself to own up as she was my daughter's ballet teacher...

SunshineAndPeardrops Fri 11-Oct-13 13:47:46

Family secret santa, budget of £20 I got:-

Mug from Thorntons with hot chocolate sachet and Marshmallows

Some teaspoons shock

£20? yeah right.... It was then I realised SIL didn't like me.

I'm still seething about it a year later angry but it's not as bad as some on here.

Sukebind Fri 11-Oct-13 13:48:18

WhatWouldCaitlinDo - my Dad has one of those tanks and he loves it! Clearly I can understand you would be less thrilled with one.

TitsMcGee Fri 11-Oct-13 19:48:19

Ahem, swift nc for this one...

I am a bit of a bookworm, so eagerly unwrapped book-shaped present from now XH, the Christmas our DC were 2yo and 5mo. It was a festive tome, entitled 'The Sex-Starved Marriage' - really got me in the mood, I can tell you hmm.

It was meant as a 'joke' apparently. Did I mention he is now XH?

My ex boyfriend gave me a candle that he had got for his sister one year. As in, he spent all of a fiver on a candle for his sister, who he then decided didn't deserve it because she had the brass neck (hmm) to be admitted to hospital for her eating disorder, and gave it to me instead. The present wasn't bad because of what it was, but because of the circumstances and his treatment of his poor sister.

My best crap present was a second hand floral apron/tea cosy/melamine tray set that DP's elderly great aunt gave us. As baffling as it was at the time, the apron has come in very handy, as has the tray.

notagiraffe Fri 11-Oct-13 20:18:23

Christmas after DTs were born, I'd lost all my baby weight and really wanted a warm but stylish coat as I spent hours outside with DC walking in parks etc. DH got me a poo-brown granny coat about 4 sizes too big. I tried really hard not to be upset but I cried. It was really expensive and he returned it but refused to let me have equivalent money to buy a new coat. (Maybe he'd got it from a discount place.)

Upandover Fri 11-Oct-13 21:04:17

Marks and Spencer's chocolates marked as a free gift on the label ... A good few months out if date from my lovely step brother grin

Upandover Fri 11-Oct-13 21:08:17

Oh and a charity goat when I was about 12 from a aunt

nickdrakeslovechild Fri 11-Oct-13 21:45:23

I have 2, the first was a toilet brush and holder with the holder being a ceramic baby on a potty. And an really tight ex once got his sister to make me a hamper with some stuff she had in the house so I got a dusty basket badly wrapped in cling film with some dried up cracked soap in and half used bath salt cubes. My lovely DP got me an Ipad this year so my pick of men has got better thank god!

AnnaBegins Fri 11-Oct-13 21:49:24

2kids, my DH just got me one of those car cameras for my birthday. I did want one but he wanted one more and it was not present material! Was my main present too sad

marssparklesdownonme Fri 11-Oct-13 22:01:35

DH gave me a computer printer a couple of years ago. He couldn't understand why I was so upset. It was for his benefit, not mine.

A smoking baby ornament. From SIL. I hate smoking and I'd just had a baby. Hmmm.

My uncle is a legend in our family. Everyone came to ours for Christmas when I was younger. His main gift to my mum one year? A sack of potatoes. That he intended to eat while staying for fricking ever that Christmas grin

My worst present recently has been a pair of 2nd hand old lady slippers, 2 sizes too small. From DH's granny. Yes, they were hers but she'd been given some new ones...

2kidsintow Sun 13-Oct-13 17:22:57

Nope, Anna , def not present material.

Shodawnofthedead Sun 13-Oct-13 17:48:22

DH, on our first Christmas together, bought a selection of gifts from a catalogue company- not quite Ann Summers, but not far off.

One item was a white all-in-one sort of... body thingy. It had four thin strips of material coming from the neck (two for the front, two for the back), joining at the waist, then two slightly broader strips of material (one front and back) which joined in a wide Velcro strip at the crotch. (Nicely placed to snag hairs, obvs)

Apparently he thought it would be useful for me to wear while doing karate training...

dingit Sun 13-Oct-13 17:52:18

Not me, but my best friend got one of those ceramic chickens that you keep your eggs in. It cost her dh £100. If it had been my dh he would have been off to a&e to have it removed from certain parts of his anatomy.

hearthwitch Sun 13-Oct-13 18:07:02

my mother who I'm now nc with was really bad at presents. the best was the year when my twin got a set of matched luggage and I got a pile of second hand skirts from the charity shop wrapped in a black bin bag. but apparently she had spent the same on us both. confused

babyseal Sun 13-Oct-13 18:17:32

One packet of deep frozen onion bhajis, the one packet bit being important, as it had "Buy one Get One Free" emblazoned over it. hmm They were from my ex-ils, and it smarted particularly as their other dil got a vaseful of twiggy shit.grin

DontMentionThePrunes Sun 13-Oct-13 18:24:20

A 4-plug adaptor socket thing. Big whoop!

SarahFx Sun 13-Oct-13 18:25:45

My MIL is legendary for her crap presents. She's not so bad at mine, I generally get some trinket from Accessorise but her son's are embarrassing.

The best one was a Fruit Bosket (that's not a typo) which was a wicker fruit basket imported from Romania, manufactured in 1977 ( it said on the box) which she'd picked up from a flea market. It came complete with a large muddy footprint on the front. Another year I suggested a new dressing gown. Perhaps from the White Company.
She bought him a hideous waffle number from Asda with the £4 reduced sticker still attached.

I'd rather she bought him nothing as she upsets him every Christmas with her shit gifts but rings up weeks in advance to ask what we are going to buy her! I normally suggest a flick of the V's when she rings to enquire.

My birthday's three days before Christmas, so I'm going to pretend my 18th birthday present from my then boyfriend was a Christmas present.

A single white candle - the type that is sold as a 'household candle' in a red box, for use in power cuts.

Three gurning ceramic frogs, about an inch high, with wibbly wobbly eyes, one of them clutching a key that had '18!' stamped across it.

A ceramic money box, in the shape of a treasure chest with a teddy bear lying on top of it.

It was a very good thing he was away in Costa Rica for four months at the time. Within thirty seconds of opening it, I decided he was regulated to 'ex' status.

One year I got the how clean is your house book, another year a set of coffe cups (I don't drink coffee) and a tea towel.

Ilanthe Sun 13-Oct-13 18:43:39

A 1kg bag of Tilda basmati rice.

It was a passive aggressive dig from my BIL about the fact that I should, as a woman, do the cooking.

imsureineverdo Sun 13-Oct-13 19:15:56

Memoirs of an Unfit Mother by Anne Robinson.

Clearly my ex-Mil was trying to tell me something!

Dededum Sun 13-Oct-13 19:22:22

A golf course membership. They couldn't deal with me giving up golf, they kept paying for it despite the fact that I played 3 or 4 times a year. Then they decided that it was my pressie, according to DH the look on my face was priceless.

paparoberts Tue 10-Dec-13 16:30:45

A laminator! Top of the range! I still haven't yet laminated anything and the thing is still boxed!

Marne Tue 10-Dec-13 17:07:19

My Nan (bless her) always gives us odd gifts, I enjoy opening her presents because they always make me smile, gifts have included:

A tin of ham
2 odd silver spoons (this was last years gift)
Lavender soap <boak> (I always give this to my mum so she can give it to her partners mum who is old and likes lavender).
Pineapple chunks
Novelty tea towels (with random places on, I think she picks these up at jumble sales)
Hankies (1880's style hankies)
Jigsaw puzzles with bits missing smile

Sadly she's getting very old so wont be doing gifts this year (as she no longer goes to jumble sales and charity shops) and will be giving money instead, I will miss her gifts sad.

Moreisnnogedag Tue 10-Dec-13 17:11:28

A barbie bubble bath bottle with the top half being an actual barbie with a skirt that covered the bottle. From my nan-in-law bless her.

cantheyseeme Tue 10-Dec-13 17:16:32

I love awful presents they make me grin a couple of years ago mil got me some stick on led lights for caravans.... we dont own or use a caravan, bless her haha!

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