First Christmas since splitting from dh(7 Posts)
Anyone else having there first Christmas since splitting up?
I am looking forward to Christmas with just me and the dc's, I just hope I can make it special for them, money is going to be a bit tight compared to last year, dc1 has asked for a laptop and I will do my best to get one, previous years we have just gone out and bought what they wanted plus a few extras, this year will be a bit different, luckily they are old enough to understand but doesn't stop me feeling guilty. They will get to see their dad over Christmas but I doubt he will buy them much or take them anywhere nice. How can I make it special for the ( they are 10 and 12 )?
It will be special. I think I'd try to stick with your usual traditions where possible but try to introduce one or two new treats. Something easy, like a onesie & popcorn film night, hot chocolate or something. Get them involved - they won't enjoy it any more if you are running round like a loon trying to do everything yourself.
Second hand is absolutely fine.
My ex and I used to go halves on the children's main presents. Would your ex be willing to do that?
Spend time not money on them.
So get a nice hot choc mix, or the lump of choc on a spoon type, bag of marshmallows and can of whipped cream to make naice hot choc, and enjoy together snuggled up watching a movie, as the 3 of you.
Do some baking with them, for some treats that you either all love, or that you've never made before.
Ask them what they'd like, both to get (let them know the budget issues or a rough guide) and to do.
Are they still Stocking people? (As in, Santa leaving one)? If so, try to gather the bits from now - keep an eye on the Bargains thread on the Christmas board for ideas.
And yes, get them involved. Doing some jobs, maybe thinking about making presents for each other, you and wider family, or making cards for them. They are certainly old enough to help out a fair bit in things like prepping and cooking the meals, tidying up, keeping their rooms tidy, folding laundry (you could make it a race to see who does the neatest job in 10 minutes rather than the fastest as that could be messy results!).
Bring them Christmas "shopping", but more about going into town and enjoying the atmosphere with a hot choc and a bun in a coffee shop than actually doing lots of shopping. Enjoy the choirs singing in shopping centres/main streets.
Get out for brisk walks in the fresh air.
Or bring them to a movie instead of a panto to save a few £s.
You know, I would ask them what they would like their christmas with you to be, see what ideas they come up with and how you can implement them. They may want a different meal for example, they may suggest ways of spending the day. Sometimes making a change from what you used to do when their dad was with you all can be helpful, you can make some new traditions.
Focus on the things you can do together and get the DC to help with making and putting up decorations, cooking and other preparations. Find out about local events like Christmas lights switching on ceremonies which are free.
Read all the threads about bargains for inspiration, don't feel guilty. Lots of people have to be careful with their budget for gifts. Actually, I think it makes them very creative. OK the stocking presents might have to be more practical items, but it shouldn't matter as they are older now.
I need to get dc1 a laptop as she needs one to do homework, we don't have one in the house (just a old iPad ) so it's not just something she wants but something we would need to buy anyway, I am hoping to find a bargain of get a 2nd hand one, I can't spend the same amount on dc2 but luckily they don't quite understand the cost of things so I might get away with it, dc2 is still into plastic tat and is easily pleased.
We do lots of baking and visiting close family so Christmas is always fun ( not just about presents), dh has offered to help towards presents but can't give me much so I would rather buy them myself and let him buy them a small gift each for when they visit him.
For second hand laptop look st Cex. Disclaimer: I have nothing to do with them, just an impressed customer
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