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Presents for second & subsequent children(10 Posts)
This is really bugging me. Just got into bed after another day of many presents from the family (those we didn't see yesterday). I'm feeling quite overwhelmed with the amount of stuff the dds (2.9 and 5 months) have been given, but moreover, I'm worrying about what will happen with dd2 as she gets older. Obviously she will have all dd1's toys to grow into, so what do people buy her? If she has her own new stuff, the collection of toys will just become ridiculous. So I'm wondering what others do about this? My only sister is 6 years older than me, so it wasn't an issue for us, as we were into totally different things.
The same goes for clothes, are younger siblings always going to have hand me downs? What about things like bikes?
Sorry if this seems trivial, but I feel sure mn must have a sensible answer!
in my family my dcs only get gifts from my Mother and my Sister I have begged and begged for them to give them nothing or some money (even just £5) we simply dont need 6 plastic phones etc etc
this year they got 6 duplicate gifts between them (I mean eg the exact same lego set)
the dcs are still young so they do find it upsetting getting the same thing
(to put this slightly into more context all my dcs have birthdays within 6 weeks of Christmas thats why they got so many duplicates and no we didnt ask for specific gifts)
however to put it another way my 3 yr old dd3 who is a tomboy did ask me once why she never got any new clothes and always had to wear her sisters hand me downs lol
i make a point of buying her the odd new thing now
yes we hand down bikes trikes you name it
I'll be interested to see what others say
You can try asking for less stuff, or you could try to guide other peoples' purchases, and limit what you buy yourself.
You could always do what we did, which has certainly curtailed the amount of gifts we get - and emigrate!
lol hoops bet it has the PO wanted me to pay £1.90 to send a bog standard birthday card the other day
its still in my bag!
I have 2 boys 2.5 years apart. The second boys does get hand me downs on toys clothes and bikes. I try to buy him a few new clothes as well so they are not all hand me downs and he has T shirts he likes. However being boys, the trousers never last past one child and I have to get new ones for the second child.
Bikes - he's had one new one and that's because the bike due for him from his brother was already a hand me down when we got it and it was pretty rough at the point it might have been handed on. Both boys had scooters at about the same time so both new.
Toys wise - we declutter and try to sell at the car boot or give away to charity. Different things come along and they might be 'into' different things. Second boy has had a lot of Skylanders this Christmas although they were not on DS1's list they have both been playing with them.
Both have been into Lego and it is easy to buy different sets eg lego city one once had the fire station and one the police station.
Thanks all. Southwest, all those duplicate gifts sound like a nightmare! I think the worst part about that is the money that's been wasted.
Loopsinhoops, I certainly will actively ask for less next year. I think I will also tell close family what we plan to get, as there was a bit of doubling up. I do think my parents got a little overexcited this year, as it was the first year that dd1 really understood what was going on.
Spababe that's interesting, I suppose as you say, with a similar age gap, at some point they'll be into things they can play together. Clothes wise, most of dd1's stuff is in very good condition, but I have got dd2 a few new bits along the way. For my two, I think there'll come a point in the not too distant future when they'll be in the same size clothes anyway, as dd2 is bigger for her age than dd1.
It's tricky isn't it, as it seems such a waste of money not to hand stuff down, but it also seems unfair that I only the first child gets everything new!
Our next challenge is working out how to store all the stuff, a trip to Ikea is needed I think! We're lucky that we have quite a bit if space, but I envy those who have a playroom/conservatory, so you can just consign all the toys to one area. I think we'll end up storing things in their rooms, & bringing a few things down to play at a time.
By the time dd2 is 5 she will want everything that dd1 has, so you just buy exactly the same things for both on most items, leaving about 7 things different, 3y of which become dd1's most treasured book light ever, and 5 of them go straight on to dd2's birthdaay list. Or maybe that's just our house. The most successful gift - other of course than breaking whenever anyone looks at it, has been a big lego set which all three shared and are really enjoying, so I would say that is the way to go - identical presents or shared presents. Mine all have hand me downs, but lucky to have friends who shop at mini boden so they last forever also dd1 much bigger than dd2 so although only 2yrs between them their clothes are 4yrs apart so they don't remember dd1 wearing them. Our main source of clothes for the girls emigrated though, but I have been known to buy new and remove labels so dd2 doesn't realise that the bags I got down from the loft for dd1 are new clothes !
We had 4DC a total of 5 years apart (GBBB). They are all grown up now but when they were little they got a lot of presents from aunts and friends of family. Big presents we bought between them.
I really don't think you need to worry about what people can buy DD2. New stuff comes out all the time. If you don't plan to have more children you just have a clear out once DD2 is too old for something, to make room for new.
As for clothes, our DS1 was small for his age and DS2 was big so they were in the same size for many years
Consumables is the way forward! Felt pens, craft stuff, chalk, pads of paper, notebooks, stickers, bubble mixture and the like go down well in our home. Another advantage of consumables is that they get used up so don't need to be stored for ages.
Thanks all, some good tips there.
Bunnies, I like the idea of identical or shared presents, stupidly I hadn't even thought about that. That's sweet of you with the clothing labels!
Sabriel, you're right about new stuff coming out. I think we'll have a similar scenario with the clothes, especially things like dresses, which only need to fit at the top. We might like another dc at some point, but you're right of course about getting rid of the stuff as the youngest finishes playing with it.
Santa, consumables a great idea! Dd1 got a few sticker books, colouring books & pencils this year, so they won't hang around too long.
I actually had a good sort out last night, after the children were in bed. I've sorted out a few unpopular toys to get rid of, put stuff dd1 has grown out of, but that isn't yet suitable for dd2, upstairs, & I've put most of the new stuff in appropriate places, so feeling more organised now! I think when you have a room full of wrapping paper & packaging, it looks horrendous, but once that's all tidied away, it seems more manageable.
Thinking about it, as a child, we only really had presents from my parents, one aunt & one grandparent, whereas our dds have us, 2 sets of grandparents, 2 aunts & uncles, cousins & friends of ours, so I think in future, it would make sense to keep this in mind.
Not sure why I'm wittering on about this on my own thread, so I'll go now!
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