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Mumsnet Discussions: Parenting : I am going to have three under 5s at the end of August (21 messages)
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Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By petitfilou on Thu 15-May-08 19:04:46
.....please can I have some tips for coping. Ds and dd have been a nightmare this afternoon. My mum and aunt say they think I'll need a bit of help (not them offering obviously - they mean paid help) - will I need it? What can a mothers help actually help with?
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Gobbledigook on Thu 15-May-08 19:06:06
You'll be fine! I had newborn, 21 month old, 3 yr old.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Gobbledigook on Thu 15-May-08 19:06:33
Sorry, that's not helpful - I'm not very good at tips. I just think you'll work your way through it and it won't be as bad as you think.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By ButterflyBessie on Thu 15-May-08 19:07:12
You will be ok, I had 4 under 5, you just get on with it - you have to grin
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By foxythesnowfox on Thu 15-May-08 19:07:46
You WILL cope - I had 3, 22 mo and newborn.

I've got to dash now, but I'll have a think and be back grin
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By belgo on Thu 15-May-08 19:08:39
I'll have three under fives in october. I'm hoping to get a cleaner a couple of hours a week for the first six months or so.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By hatrick on Thu 15-May-08 19:12:55
It will be fine, I don't think you will need any help, just make sure you are quite flexible about things and don't expect to be super organised and calm wink
I had dd3 when dd1 was 2.9 and dd2 was 16 months so had 3 under 3 and it was okay- busy but okay. In July when ds is born I will have 4 under 5 but am just going to play it by ear and not kill myself trying to do everything.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Gobbledigook on Thu 15-May-08 19:16:36
IME, life was easier and calmer at the stage too. It's now that it's completely hectic and knackering (7, 5, 3).
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By PosieParker on Thu 15-May-08 19:18:17
You'll be fine... it's easier with three not being pregnant than it is with two and being pregnant!!
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By LyraSilvertongue on Thu 15-May-08 19:19:04
I would definitely need a cleaner at the very least.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By belgo on Thu 15-May-08 19:21:37
I'm also hoping that the older two will entertain the new baby and tire the baby out so that the baby sleeps well at night - wishful thinking perhaps?grin
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By staranise on Thu 15-May-08 19:28:10
Me too, but in December. I have a cleaner once a week and don't do much outside of that. Used to cook everything myself, have relaxed a bit and buy a lot more ready-made stuff.

My oldest will start school in September and my second (aged 2) will be at nursery two mornings a week. TBH, I'm hoping that, because of school etc, life will be easier than it is now, ie, being pregnant with two pre-schoolers!! Maybe I'm fooling myself...
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By PosieParker on Thu 15-May-08 19:35:00
I have a cleaner twice a week and a woman to do my ironing, if you want cheap labour perhaps offer a teenage relative £5 an hour to do your ironing!!
When you have three or more you prioritise, the one with the greatest need gets answered first, you let go of unnecessary stress like stair carpets cleaned! and you give yourself a break!! Have small goals and go with the flow. Invest in safe play activities for your older children, decent pens and paper that they can access. I bought a tray and cabinet from this place and have picture labels onthem so the children can access great things to do anytime.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By NotABanana on Thu 15-May-08 19:37:31
Stock up on food that can be cooked straight from the freezer. Get used to having your food delivered so you don't have to go out more than necessary. Make sure you have the right wheels for getting out - buggy/double buggy/sling etc. Don't stress about the small stuff. Good luck. I had 3 under 5 and then a school to contend with too.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Sam100 on Thu 15-May-08 19:46:18
I had 3 under 5 a couple of years ago (4.5, 3 and newborn). Would advise:

- take whatever help you are offered with both hands
- internet grocery deliveries
- a cleaner if you can afford (or get offers of help to do the hoovering etc)
- some form of daycare for older 2 if possible - e.g. preschool, CM or nursery
- have days when none of you get dressed until lunchtime/teatime and enjoy it!
- have days when you get up and dressed straight away so if you need/want to go out you can
- if your local college do a childcare course find out if they need home placements for students - i did this and had a fab girl for 2 days a week who was doing CACHE course - she organised activities for the older child (only had 2 then) and helped with the baby
- when you cook do big portions of stuff and then freeze so you don't have to cook all the time
- use a slow cooker for stews
- put together a meal plan for the week so you dont always have to think about what to cook
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By petitfilou on Mon 19-May-08 16:54:56
Thanks all especially Sam - and sorry for not replying earlier! Have just moved house...

I have a cleaner once a fortnight (at some astronomical rate as it seems you can't get a cleaner round here) Muses about getting help with the ironing...
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By loler on Mon 19-May-08 17:34:50
DS2 was born last August (I had dd 4 and ds 2) - I found it pretty easy (much easier than when I had ds1!). My standards took a huge fall and haven't really come back up again. So what if the house is a bit dirty and a tip. The kids won't remember and my dh doesn't notice (as long as I sling all toys under the table before he gets home! - yes darling had a really busy day!!). Also lowered standards on child cleanliness - went from baths every night, to when I can be bothered. If clothes don't smell they get reworn.

Get out of the house as often as you can and you won't even see the state of the house - also when you're out it won't get any worse!

When you get the nesting thing do loads of cooking and freeze it (much more useful when the baby is born than cleaning under the beds etc!). I did loads of veg with a tomato sauce and then after ds2 was born could defrost and add pasta/curry power/chilli powder etc for a variety of very easy meals.

I have loads of fun with the kids and I think they are happy. Hope you have the same.

PS - bad news about the starting school - makes life really really hard - tied to the clock and the nagging in the mornings is non-stop. My dd started school 4 days after ds2 was born. Roll on the holidays. Nursery is a definate life saver though - gives me and ds2 some quality time together.

Sorry about rambling - being harassed for pudding! Must be a better mother and get off the blinking computer!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By mybrainaches on Mon 19-May-08 17:36:32
I had 3 under 3, you will find a routine very quickly.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By nannyL on Mon 19-May-08 18:12:23
you'll be fine

my aunt had 3 under 2&3/4 abd i knew a mum with 3 under 14 months!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By MilaMae on Mon 19-May-08 18:43:21
I had 3 under 18 months was petrified before dd was born,the past few years have flashed by in a blur but you do cope.

The key is sticking to a routine(deviate at your peril). I now have 3 under 5 and it is a lot easier (thanks to pre-school)so try not to panic!!!!!! smile
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By BibiThree on Mon 19-May-08 18:49:36
I had a 2yo when I had my twins and I have coped so far - it is tough at times, very tough at others, but for a big part of the time it's an absolute joy. As everyone else says, go with the flow, take each day as it comes and enjoy your los.


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