Hi
My ds who is 7 is an only, although we go for days out occasionally as a family, and take him swimming, library etc he does not attend anything out of school like football, beavers etc.
Anything he does do is at after school clubs such as football on a monday, athletics on a tuesday, and then hockey on wednesdays.
Is this wrong should I be getting him involved in more activities out of school.
I am aware that many children do football weekends and go to scouts, karate, etc
Am I depriving my ds by not involving him in anything, money is a factor also as obviously it costs money to send them to things if you no what I mean.
I have started feeling quite bad about it recently and was just wondering if this is acceptable on behalf of my ds.
Any mumsnetters whose d'cs don,t really do anything other than what is provided at school.

I also do think clubs, activities after school can sometimes be awkward because of work commitments, getting the tea on etc.
Anyone else think like that or is that a selfish way to think.

I would let him take the lead. Has he asked to join any clubs? If not then dont worry about it. Some of these clubs can be fads anyway. My DD did Brownies and Bible Club mainly because her friends did.

He sounds active with the after school sports so that's great for fitness.

crikey, ds is 8 & doesnt do any regular activities, at school or otherwise.
I dont like it, but he gets bored of weekly activities quickly. Plus, him not going saves me hassle, & he's happy to do erratic stuff.

karate costs a FORTUNE, btw, be glad to be spared that

No he hasn,t mentioned wanting to join anything.
I did get him into beavers sometime ago but it became a battle getting him to go.
He was going to swimming lessons however he didn,t seem to be progressing that much with them and I found the renewal fees quite a burden.
I am on a low wage and only just manage to keep going.
I do sense he gets bored, lonely, at times and of course he is an only so thats why it has been bothering me of late.

It doesn't sound selfish at all. It sounds like your DS is getting loads of opportunities from the school clubs, I would have thought that he would be glad of some time just to chill out and enjoy being at home
My DD (6) is also an only, we do school gardening club on a Monday (she has to come as I teach it) and she goes swimming on a Wednesday - I wouldn't even consider adding anything else to the week, two late afternoons is stressful enough.
The only reason she has a swimming lesson tbh is because we live near the sea and have a large pond on the farm where we live, so its for safety's sake really, luckily she does like it anyway.

My DS is 6.5 and doesn't do any clubs. He did rugby for about three weeks then didn't want to go any more and every time I ask him if he wants to do any clubs he says no. Not even Beavers. I'm glad (secretly) because DD does ballet and brownies and what with working it would become hard work to juggle any more clubs during the week. We do go swimming every week but I take him (and taught him to swim myself <<proud mama emoticon>>).

Don't feel bad.

My dds are 7 and 6 and they don't do anything either. They go to after school club two afternoons a week when I am at work and they have music lessons during the school day but nothing else. They are beginning to ask about pony trekking on Saturdays, some of their friends do it, but tbh I'm dreading having to take them to regular weekend activities. They go to parties quite a lot and that can take up half a weekend. Am far too lazy to be driving them all over the place and we enjoy slobbing around too much....

I am starting to feel a bit better about it now.
Tbh I myself am quite happy for us to just go off as a family on days out as and when we please.
Its not just the actual cost of out of school activities, its also the petrol costs involved getting them to and from isn't it.
My ds can also be totally unmotivated after a long day at school as well.

If your ds doesn't want to do them, I really wouldn't feel any need at all. What is the point in running all over the place & never having any time to spend together if you see what I mean.
If the weather's horrible & DD is bored then I'd much rather arrange for a friend to come round or spend the time doing some cooking or making with her than have to cart her around to some expensive activity.