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Mumsnet Discussions: Parenting : Do you have to take DCs out every day or is it ok to be a slob and (24 messages)
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Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By mankymummy on Wed 07-May-08 12:51:57
let them play in the garden all day?

Am feeling guilty...!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By mazzystar on Wed 07-May-08 12:53:48
the garden is out

what ARE you on about
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By mankymummy on Wed 07-May-08 12:56:03
ah but i meant being supermum and doing the park, swimming, other jolly activity instead?! i.e out of the confines of where we live?! wink
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By mazzystar on Wed 07-May-08 12:59:56
nope
more creative and better for them to make their own amusement in the garden
jolly activity is for treats and rainy days
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By KaSo on Wed 07-May-08 13:03:04
It's far better for children to amuse themselves rather than be shunted from one jolly activity to another by an exhausted parent. I know so many kids who as soon as you say you aren't going out start with the "I'm bored" routine..
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By KerryMum on Wed 07-May-08 13:03:43
take them out every day?

are you mad woman?
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By mankymummy on Wed 07-May-08 13:07:14
ah lovely, thanks for that.

will continue slobbing whilst DS digs the garden then!

grin
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Laugs on Wed 07-May-08 19:18:02
I'm pretty sure the 'taking them out every day' thing is purely for the mum's sanity.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By Nyx on Wed 07-May-08 21:01:06
I have to take dd out every day...as we don't have a garden envy

What wouldn't I give for a garden!
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By sweetkitty on Wed 07-May-08 21:02:59
Right now as I'm pregnant and have SPD we are living in the garden, well we go to nursery and toddlers and a friends but I am doing a lot less with them than usual. They are having a ball in the garden.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By eenybeeny on Wed 07-May-08 21:05:10
gardens are great!!! I take DS out a lot but have plenty of days where we just stay home and play!! activities are overrated grin
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By HaventSleptForAYear on Wed 07-May-08 21:09:39
Definitely only for mother's sanity.

I like to get out of the house with them, but in this weather, who can face piling them into the car when they could be messing about in the garden.

Much better for them to be eating gravel and getting soaked turning on outdoor taps (what my 2 did today).

I did go out with them to town but that was for a doctor's appt. Would have prefered to stay at home.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By Hulababy on Wed 07-May-08 21:12:13
You def don;t need to take them to do something every day. Children need to learn to play independently on their own, without the activity being guided. And they need to learn to be bored too IMO!
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By MuffinMclay on Wed 07-May-08 21:26:14
We've only been out twice in the past week. Partly because of car problems, but partly because it is so nice just lazing around at home. We are living in the garden atthe moment.

Far better for children to get fresh air and develop their imagination etc than to go to endless improving activities, IMO.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By wulfricsmummy on Wed 07-May-08 22:09:06
children have an astounding capacity to self-educate, given a healthy bit of boredom and minimal intervention from adults. You're doing them a favour. When I hear about kids dragged off to the library one afternoon and swimming the next and gymtots the day after I usually feel sorry for them.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By Tapster on Wed 07-May-08 22:58:06
Tried to get my 18 month DD out of the house to go to go to Kew this morning she made it quite clear she just wanted to play in the garden. I seemed to spend the whole day pushing her in the swing - she loved it, no driving, we both had an afternoon nap, long may the good weather continue.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By seeker on Wed 07-May-08 23:07:04
My dd wanted to be taken out every day. By 9.30 we had exhausted all home based activities and she was getting her shoes and saying "Where goin today? Where my friens?" So I automatically did the same with ds, until one day he took my hand, looked into my eyes and said " Us go home, mum mum. Watch Bargain Hunt togella"

I think a day digging in your own garden is A GOOD THING.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By PussinJimmyChoos on Wed 07-May-08 23:09:51
Oooh I'm loving this thread...justification for a day 'out' in the garden with DS tomorrow! Mind you, its not that relaxing as its a tiered garden from hell (which will soon be rectified if the quote is low enough - please keep fingers crossed for me!) but its better than the faff of going out in the car!!

Hooray for the sun!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By onceinalifetime on Wed 07-May-08 23:11:08
I think you're doing really well. Christ, I've had days where dcs have not got dressed, and sometimes I haven't, and CBeebies has been on from dusk 'til dawn. blush
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By PussinJimmyChoos on Wed 07-May-08 23:17:06
Onceinalifetime...I think I love you for admitting that!!!
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By seeker on Wed 07-May-08 23:17:35
You're not doing it right though. Bargain Hunt, not Cbeebies!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By chunkychips on Wed 07-May-08 23:23:21
sun is a great excuse for doing nothing. Get them in the garden with a bucket of water and they can amuse themselves for hours.
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By chunkychips on Wed 07-May-08 23:26:43
hilarious seeker. and if he spends time in the garden he might end up with the tan to match!
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By susiecutiebananas on Wed 07-May-08 23:43:10
Cant tell you how great it is to read this thread! Feel so much better, honestly, I can't thank you enough!!!

I have to stay at home with DD, most days in fact, as I have a horrible problem with my back and arthitis in the hip that isn't replaced. I've felt guilty since she was born, almost, that we have to spend so much time at home.

However, I console myself with the fact that it means she gets an enormous amount of 1-1 with me. She has learnt ( at 15months) how to adapt to our situation. MAny days I can't even lift her up, which is heart breaking if she's crying. She's found ways around it. She knows that she can stand next to a chair, or sofa, and scramble a little, and I can then pick her up!

It meant that from early on, we've read a lot of books and done puzzles. So now, she is happy to sit on the floor and look through books, or in her bed when she wakes up. as she's got a bit older, we've been able to do painting and drawing too. ( if you can call it that! wink )

I was at the pain clinic last week, and I got really upset about the fact that DD doesn't get to go out to toddler groups, or gym tots etc, we do have a few friends with small Dc's and i have one very nearby so we do get there when we can so she is with other children. Anyway, the consultant said that she's always felt sorry for the children that do't get to spend time at home. The children that are taken from one place to the next, and aren't getting that attention at home from their mummies or daddies.

Everyone comments on how happy she is, how secure she is, and when she goes to my mums, we try at least once a week, mum takes her to see other people, or they pop in to hers, and all comment on how confident she is, and chatty, and happy etc. So, I guess all i all, its benefitted her more than anything... at least thats what i've convinced myself and I feel less guilty... a little!!

I LOVE this weather though, as she toddles up and down the garden, happily playing. I need to get a few more toys for the garden now though. Or there will be no shingle left on the driveway, and the plants took a bit of a battering today grin

one last thing, more a question really... how on earth do you get them to keep their hats on, especially when its essential with the gorgeous red hair she's got!! ?? grin


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