Many thanks to everyone who has contributed to our Miscarriage Code of Practice recommendations for Alan Johnson, Lord Darzi all other UK health ministers. We've compiled into a list of 10 key recommendations here.
Ohh A Holiday!!!! I have a friend comign to stay at the end of May we are dress shopping (bridesmaid and me!) then another night out!!!
Going down south next weekend to stay with my dad for a long weekend, taking the boys to longleat, bournmouth
Also, My friend is PA to the director at DP's work, she has roped me into organising a weekend summer ball type thing in a big castle for July so I have lots to look forward to
Just wanna get this big cloud of worry lifted off me still no word from hospital, Have to take DS1 to docs in the morning then I will give them a ring see if I can get somewhere...
Life is so cruel. I pray that this will only be a blip and nothing serious. Your mum sounds such a darling. Please take some time out and remember that we can all jump to conclusions. Not knowing is what scares us. Please wait for the facts before getting yourself into a state. Easier said than done I know. I'm a fine one to be dishing out the advice about not being scared. Look at me, LITTLE MISS POOPY PANTS . But please try hun. I assume they will be doing further tests before any kind of surgery.
I will be checking this thread so just update this one hun when you have time. )))))))))))))HUGS(((((((((((((((((
Oinker, was checking in yesterday. Im hoping you have had D&C now, will be thinking of you xx
Im off back to the hospital today, scan yesterday showed a mass embedded in my uterus muscles and scar tissue, the big C word was mentioned and also they kept asking if I was done having kids Was in a horrible state yesterday, my mum is here now, god love her she drove 200 miles to be with me for a few days.. Im a complete mess!
Surgery is looking likely to remove the mass so either way hysterectomy or not there will be damage Im just so devastated
Oinker So sorry hun. Hope everything works out as best it can. It's been so long since I was on here. (((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))) for you hun. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Anytime you need me, pop me an email x
Don't rush into it all though.... Take it easy.......
I'm quite lucky with DH he is a good house keeper. He does give me the occassional lok though.......... (get of your arse and do something) I have been quite lazy recently. I think I have a good excuse though !!!!!!!!
Oh Julez, Am sooooooooooooooo pissed off with myself for nt logging on sooner. Sorry for not being here for you to chat to. So sorry you are having to go through all of this. I can't beleive you ahve had to had a second ERPC. There's me moaning and banging on about not wanting one. What a bloody nightmare. Hun, I really hope this is all cleared up now. I have been tucked up sorting out and getting over my 40th birthday party. It took my mind of things. I am dreading thursday. Have my appointment at 0700. Like you I just want some normality. I have enjoyed not popping the folic acid. I don't intend taking it again until at least july.............
Had my scan yesterday morning the Mole had regerated itself they said, HCG went back up, i started feeling sick again.
Had my second ERPC last night around 9pm, DP came and got me this morning, boys are off elsewhere so Im in bed resting, feeling ok, tired, exhausted, fed up, I really have had enough with this whole pregnancy. I so very much want to say to DP "lets never get pregnant again" But then I see friends babies, picutres of babies and I cant bare the thought of it.
I know its all fresh in my mind, and boy did it hit me yesterday, I snapped at everyone, cried all day, I keep thinking I have been through enough why do I have to keep going through this. When I found out with this pg I ws shocked and so not ready, but now I want another baby. Even though DS is still a baby. We will wait a year or so before making the final decsion I just hate that I do have to make the decision Im only 26 I should have years left before I need to make it
Im so fucking fed up of this, sorry for language, I have to go back up the hospital this morning, bleeding is never ending, I am in agony. Argued with DP, fell out with friends, struggling looking after DS I wanna move back home near to my mum where I will get the help I need
You should not be bleeding that much. You should contact the hospital. Make sure you speak to someone ASAP.
Unfortunately I have to have the D&C. There has be no change. I am booked in for the 16th. I am not happy, I really did not want this, but I have to be sensible. Prof was really understanding but he said he had to advise me to have it otherwise it could cause infection and unecessary future problems.............
Well, it is here.......... Am 40 tomorrow... I can't beleive it..
Im ok, not great tbh, infection really hit me, i was out of it for two days, Im up and about now, but everytime i stand up the bleeding is awful not sure if its normal. I cant understand why im losing so much after an ERPC ?
How are you hun? I really hope everything has cleared up now.
I have my appointment in the morning and will be scanned again. Hopefully everything will be cleared up. If not it's an ERPC for me..................
Anyway, I had a really great time in Spain. The weather was great and so was the hotel and more importantly the food. It was such a great break........... Got quite depressed before coming home...
julez really sorry to hear about your infection. make sure you take all the meds they throw at you and rest loads. sending lots of get well soon wishes
Ooh, I've always fancied Reijkavic (but can't spell it!) - maybe you could go there and tell me lots of lovely things about it next week.
Glad the op went ok Julez, and that the physical side of it is now over.
Shall I make you laugh with how pathetic I was today? I went for my glucose tolerance test, and managed to not only pass out, but then throw up 10 times afterwards, and piss myself on the way home whilst throwing up . They had never seen anyone be quite so ill from having fasting bloods, and needless to say had to cancel the test as I'd chucked up the glucose drink! What a wimp!
julez glad you are Ok and everything went well. Don't overdo it though take some time out.
I am trying to sort out a weekend away for me and DH. Would love somewhere warmer than here... Whatever I do I know that I will be out of here this weekend. I NEED SOME FRESH AIR AND WARM SUNSHINE...........
I go back in the morning, first on the list so should go down to theatre at half 8. Just glad its nearly over with now, its dragged on for so bloody long.
Oinker, Im glad you have a few more weeks off. Time off will do you good
I cant wait to get back to my normal self.
My DS(baby) has been ill all week with vomiting so I nearly called off the op, but he finally stopped puking at 8pm last night. So i persuaded them to do all the pre op stuff anf let me go home and go back in the morning. Hopefully they said Ill be ready to go home at lunch time We have pretty much decided to look into surrogacy if next lot of investigations dont give us no hope
Im back from the hospital, the mole has grown, so im in sunday for the op
It looked considerably larger than it did in the last scan, they took bloods ive got to ring later to find out the numbers.
I got home today aswell to pregnancy notes pushed through my door with an appt for next thurs for her to come talk to me...
I have already had 2 midwives knock on the door and I explained to both of them. I rung her and she was very apologetic, lept saying sorry and asked if I was ok.
it was like a kick in the teeth. We are researching surrogacy now. Just looking into it, nothings for deffinate yet, My midwife at EPU thinks this new consultant will want to do further investigations once all the molar testing is over with. Just to make sure they didnt miss anything last time.
I have to go in for a scan and blood tests firt thing to see if its all come out, if not i am in sunday afternoon for surgery on monday morning i just want to be back to normal!
Hope you are feeling better....It sounds awful. I have spoken to HR today and they don't want me back until the m/c is complete. It looks like I have a couple of more weeks off. Not sure how I feel about that though...i sooooooooooooooo bored. Have already decorated the loft room and painted the hallway... I may give the garden a go if this good weather continues.
Oinker - couldnt you take a few more days off? You dont sound ready to go back yet. Luckily I dont have to think about that.
DS is better today, hes sleeping now so Ive put myself back in bed, pain is awful and crippling today, bleeding has stopped being so heavy but last night i woke up covered in it (TMI SORRY)I was in the bath at 5am this morning, ive got stronger pain killers today so after my btah im gonna take some and relax and hopefully watch a disney film with the boys.
if Im honest im throwing myself into other arrangements, we are getting married next july and Ive just persuaded DP we need to get the house sorted and move! He got a pay rise so some good news at least. So Im picking out colours, ordering kitchen cupbaords etc..
I am so sorry I didn't pick this up until today. It is shitty, I know. It's worst for you as yo have your little one to care for too. At least I can just sit alone and get on with things. Mind you, I have been getting really lonely. Dreading the thought of going back to work on Monday. Am still bleeding quite a bit but it's not a constant heavy flow. I can't justify staying home any longer...I will see what arrangements I can make at work for the next few weeks. Prof did warn me that when my period is due it would bevery heavy and uncomfortable as the scan still shows some product that needs to pass.....
I may try and get a bit of self pampering in down the gym......
Gosh, Julz, I'm so sorry. It all sounds horrible .
I'm sure you know better than me, I was 11 weeks along, but embryo only measured 7 weeks - the night that most everything passed, I had pain in waves that made me stop what I was doing and squeeze DH's hand. Most people describe them as mini-contractions. When the sac passed, it wasn't painful, but I definitely felt it, although mine wasn't as big as yours. One thing, though - the doctor told me not to take baths, only showers, because of risk of infection. Not sure if that's accurate advice, but thought I'd mention it?
oinker Im sorry you are still going through this, lifes not fair sometimes...I have a cold sore too, i dont usually get them but thsi one is huge and sore least of my worries though.
Im pretty shitty today, bleeding has gotten heavy this morning, passed a few clots, have a horrid headache. Around 9am this morning ds2 (1) started vomiting. DS1 (6) is out for the day DP will pick him up on the way home. ds2 just keeps wimpering and whingy, then falling asleep.
I am still not "soaking" pads but thats because when i feel like im losing i sit on the toilet for a bit
hoping to avoid D&C now. Feeling a bit tearful today sorry for the long post, no one else seems to understand
I have tried the progesterone too....It didn't work
NKCells are Natual Killer cells which are in the uterus... We all have them bt docs reckon that they increase in some women when they are pregnant and that causes the cells to attack the feotus like a cancer and kills it.........Check it out on line it makes some interesting reading...
How shitty. I really feel for you. I cannot beleive we have to go through all time after time. I hope the pain killers are doing the trick.
I have not long been back from the hospital. I can't beleive I turned up hung over. They fast tracked me cos the doctor spotted me dozing off. He thought I was just run down (the cold sore looked convincing)due to m/c. Anyway, got to go back. There are still products left. If bleeding gets heavy I will have a D&C.
I think hughes is the same as aps what my friend had. I have read a bit about it. It just means some women's blood clots more easily in PG but doesn't mean you have all the symptoms of hughes (strokes, rashes etc...)
Sorry to be ignorant...can you tell me what NKC are? I don't know about this.
I wonder if they might think about the progesterone for you as well?...I know you mentioned the steroid treatment too. You must still have heart but give yourself time to recover and to feel well again. My last loss was 9 weeks ago and I'm only just starting to feel "ok". Poll xxx
Hello julez
I haven't read all of this thread, but sorry to see you here too. I hope all goes as well as it can for the 31st. poll xxx
Wanted to do a little update, Im told its a partial Molar pregnancy... D&C is booked for 31st.
I woke up this morning (after a very drunken night at our friends house) Pain and bleeding. Rung hospital like I was told, examined, told me cervix was open, bleeding in minimal, given pain killers and sent home. Much rather be in the comfort of my own home. But I am around 12 weeks preg (well Im not obviously) But preg sac and placenta has kept growing just not baby.
I dont know wha to expect, all of my losses have been early on, nothing to major or painful physically iykwm?
Is it gonna be horrendous? I am dosed up on pain killers and they have totally knocked me for 6? Pains are still pretty bad, I have got a bath run which i keep topping up and getting in, hot water bottle, lots of water and lemonade. I feel hungry but too sick to eat so Im nibbling bits
It has been nearly two years at St Marys. They don't really offer anything more than aspirin and clexane. I have thick blood (hughes syndrome) one of the indicators of this is being able to get pregnant at the drop of a hat..... If you are thinking of going to rof Regans clinic be aware they only do the routine blood tests, scans etc. They do not test for NK cells.
Doctor Shehata does both private and NHS in the Epsom area. If you are in London or close by check him out. He does all routine tests including the NK cell tests.
I have an appointment tomorrow atthe hospital just to check no bits are left after the m/c. I will then see a doctor. It will be the same old story..... Sorry...Blah, Blah, Blah.......... They have no other tests to carry out on me....
I know.... it is a totally demoralising. Words can't describe the sense of defeat and failure and the hardest thing is not having the answers.
I have heard of UNK but have to say I am no expert. I have regan's miscarriage book which has made me more aware of all the reasons for M/C.
I'm afraid I do not know what are causing my m/c's as the last one, I am still waiting on results to come through. I have heard really good things about Liverpool Women's too, so I hope you get some positive results back.
The person I know who was treated at St marys had a blood clotting problem (APS) and once treated she had success in the end but it was a long road and she also had lots of early losses too.
If you have not long been under st marys, give it more time. If you can get pg I'm sure you can get there. I don't know how quickly you get pg in between your losses but maybe if you can allow yourself to rest for a bit, then you will feel stronger about going again.
Hi and welcome. I don't mean to sound so negative when I go on about St Marys. it's just that I went to them pretty late in the discovery of all my m/c's. I was refered from Queen Charlottes. That was because I asked to be. I really beleive it is a guessing game. No-one really knows how to deal with us. I now have some papers from the Womens Hospital Liverpool for my UNK cell tests. Hopefully that will give me a definate answer.
In answer to your questions my m/c's always start soon afrter a heart beat is seen. The heartbeats are always slow and stop totally within 2 weks of it being detected. I literally get a .......... So sorry, and a shrug of the shoulders.... THEY HAVE NO IDEA............ I have literally been taking the same medication all the time.... Aspirin.........then...........aspirin and clexane.......IT IS NOT WORKING and they keep telling me to try again maybe next time it'll work.....Of course it won't.... Even I can see a definate pattern....
I know I am coming into this thread weeks after it has been running and you have lots of friends on here supporting you through.
I really am sorry for all your losses, it really is the hardest thing to go through.
I wanted to ask you at what stages did you m/c with your losses?
I have had several m/c's too and have thought about a referral to st marys, but after reading some of the responses here, I wonder if it's all it's meant to be?
I don't have any wise words as I'm still trying to fathom what is going so wrong with my pg's I'm afraid.
Someone I know was also put on progesterone as well as the aspirin and it worked in the end. (she too had 7 m/c) So there are always happy endings. Infact even with her the aspirin treatment took a few goes b/f they got there.
Julie and Oinker, i have only just caught up with this post, i am so very sorry for your losses, am sending you both meaningful gentle hugs. Take things easy my friends. wenXXX.
Today went well. I was OK. I was a little sad when there. I was unable to find the plot. She was buried in woodland in a green burial site. The family have placed a baby oak tree at the site but nothing else. No name plaque, nothing. Others have grown beautiful small gardens... It really saddened me. Anyway, I sat with her a while and ate my packed lunch and mini birthday cake. It felt good and she would have loved it.
Glad your able to keep busy, Im not one for sitting round doing nothing either.
I will be thinking of you tomorrow Its the anniversary of my nans death too
At my other gran funeral yesterday.
One more word too "MIL" i dont really need to say anymore, Ive been in tears alot of today, she makes me feel like a rubbish mum the one thing i thought i got right....
Still no bleeding but have a horrid headache today, tablets cant shift it and i usually get them the day before AF/bleeding with all the other losses so Im hoping it starts soon. 24th seems so long away I am going to ring them up tomorrow and make it for next week whilst DS is still in school.
I have been trying to concentrate on other things today.... M/C still very slow...
I have been arranging my 40th (decided to just have a party)
Have a stressful day ahead of me tomorrow. Best friends birthday....she died last september. Am braving the cemetery. She was so good to me. Supported me through all of the shite I went thru from the first and subsequent m/c's.
I am OK. I knew this was going to be the case. Have already planned some decorating to fill in the time whilst I am off work. I will not be having the D&C. I didn't see the point. The results are always inconclusive.
baby died at 7 weeks they said CSWS I should be just over 10! My mum said I even look pregnant (after I asked for her opinion, she didnt just come out with it lol)
So I dunno whats going on, Im guessing I still have symptoms because my HCG levels where so high because it started off as a twin pregnancy. Its 2 weeks this friday since I found out.
How long has it been now Julez? I didn't start bleeding until 4 weeks after my first had died. Didn't still have symptoms though, but I don't really do symptoms in the first place when I'm pregnant.
Wanted to pop on and say good luck for the morning
Still no sign, boobs are agony and sickness still there. I dont mind waiting so long as there is no risk i want to avoid a D&C if possible I have too much scar tissue in there already.
Im off to my grandmas funeral tomorrow, so had to travel to my mums tonight, without the boys and DP and thegodawful MIL !!!
I have my scan tomorrow at 0900. Have had bleeding and some small clots since the last one. I am just waiting for confirmation of the inevitable. Doc has just signed me off for another 3 weeks. Will take that time to get back on track with slimming and exercising. My 40th is approaching fast...4 weeks away I have nothing planned yet have had too much to deal with.
Isn't such a long delay odd... And you still have the sickness I would have thought it had started to calm down a bit..... Have you tried the method I suggested?
I have a steady flow of red... not enough for pads though...No cramps..nothing..mind you I suppose I stil have symptoms...My boobs are killing me still, if anyhting, much more than before.. I really just want my hospital appointment now, just so's I can crack on with my plans..Diet etc....
Cantsleepwontsleep (love the name by the way) You're right.........that's xactly what I thought. These people are highly educated..they know exactly what they're doing, what they're saying and who to.. (DESPERATEWOMEN) Anyway, with regards to getting pregnant easily..I have read that this is a classic sign of HUGHES SYNDROME... It's a bloody curse...It's a no win situation.
Well it sounds like you have his blessing then Oinker, and he maybe realises what you have planned, but can't ask officially.
If this pregnancy is over, then very best of luck next time. I'm guessing you're quite good at the conception side of things given the number of m/cs you've managed to rack up?
Julez - how are you doing now? Has the bleeding started yet?
Clots stopped but I have a steady slow flow of red blood.
I am focussing on the future. I honestly beleive this pregnancy is over and am just waiting for the confirmation. I am definately going to do the steroids. I spoke to the prof about it the other day. Ididn't say I was going to self medicate but he answered all my questions. Told me what dosage he would give me and for how long.
He mentioned that they do no trials at St MAry's, therefore no testing is done for the NKCells. They just go ahead and prescribe the steroids. There are no follow ups done onlythe weekly scans. No blood tests, nothing. This suits me cos that way they would not no I am taking them. If all went to plan I would tell them at 3months.
Oh Oinker. I'm so, so sorry to hear this. I just hope it's like Julezboo says...a bleeding thing that doesn't mean the end. It's just so awful when you've been there before.. especially with such regularlity!
Try to get an early scan sorted. It's sometimes best to know what you're dealing with and either put your mind at rest (as much as it can be in these circumstances) or at least gives you a definite outcome that you can focus on.
My heart bleeds for you, even though I don't know you and it's making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up just thinking about what you're going through.
Whatever is happening, take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up for feeling scared/down/crap...whatever. Let other people spoil you and look after you and take care. I'm still hoping for the best though...
Passed a few clots during the night. Nothing recognisable though. No cramping or pain. Am under strict instructions to stay in bed today. It's a waiting game.. This whole thing is exact replica of last pregnancy
still no word from hospital, Have to take DS1 to docs in the morning then I will give them a ring see if I can get somewhere... 
