Sorry, long, drawn-out and over detailed
DS is 9 months and has never been a good sleeper. We weaned him off night time feeds a month or so ago and since then he's slept from around 7.30pm to any time from 5.45am to 7am. We thought this was absolutely brilliant until the HV came last week to do his check up and asked about his naps.

He normally will only nap for 45 minutes at 9am, 1pm and 5pm. She seemed totally freaked out that he napped at 5pm and said that no baby older than 6 months should be napping after 4pm and said she thought the reason he was waking early in the morning was because of this.

For the last two days I've tried to keep him up until bedtime, so eliminating his 3rd nap late afternoon and bringing tea and bedtime forward. But he became very tired and grouchy, didn't have much tea and took a long time to settle for bed. The following morning (yesterday) he woke a little later - 6.45ish - and then his first nap lasted 1 and 1/4 hours, so it had an effect on this. But lunch time nap was 45 mins and again the afternoon nap was missed and he wasn't happy.

This morning he woke at 5.45am, went for a nap at 9.30am but stirred at 10.15 so I went to wake him. Think he might have settled back and gone longer, but I wanted to see if he'd sleep longer in the middle of the day. He didn't. So I've put him down for a nap now.

I just feel that it was kind of working for us and I'm not sure whether to persevere with reducing his naps at the risk of messing everything up, or to carry on as we were. He's starting nursery in August and will be 1 by then, and I know they like them to have a big sleep in the middle of the day there. But he's not 1 yet, and they do drop naps themselves, don't they?

Any advice?

Are you happy with the staus quo? Is your child happy? If you both are, then leave everything as is

I'd've thought a child getting up at any time from 5.45am to 7am was really normal? That's not so very early. Obviously later than 5.45pm is better. You're really fortunate he sleeps through. That's brilliant.

You just carry on with what work for you. Every child is different, has different sleep needs and their own pattern.

I'm really at a health visitor freaking out at your DS having a nap after 5pm. How does she react when she sees real problems like neglected babies or malnourished children? Silly woman, creating problems where there are none.

You just do what you think works for you and your DS.

If you were happy with the way it was before keep it that way. If you weren't then maybe look at the HV advice. But in all honesty from my own experiences with both of mine cutting the naps a bit in the day never affected the early mornings, they were just tice as grumpy and tired cause they hadn't slept enough but it never for some reason made them sleep longer.

I found it far easeir to just go along with them and let them sleep when they needed it rather than try and add or cut out naps. Do what works for you not what anyone elses says should work for you.

This isn't really advice, just what we did! DD (2 1/2) dropped her own naps, though still has one now and then if I really manage to wear her out! I was never rigid about when she napped, and I'm the same with DS (5 months). If DD was tired at 5pm, I let her sleep at 5pm. If you are happy with the way things were and they were working, I'm sure it's fine to continue. Also our nursery is happy for kids to nap when they want, they don't try to enforce a set time. I would probably ignore the HV!

Oh good thanks everyone, that's what my instincts were telling me. It definitely works for us, as it means DH gets to see him when he gets home too.

So it's ok for them to nap for no more than 45 minutes? He just never seems to go for longer, only if he's poorly.

Bloody busy body Hv...If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

The fact he will only nap for 45 mins at a time suggests that he is not good and self settling when he is in light sleep period (which happens every 45mins). HOwever if you are all happy why change it?

Only read first 2 paragraphs,

Your HV is talking crap. If it suits you and your baby do not listen to her.

She would have had a fit with my son -

slept 9.45-10.30
2-5pm and 7-7 up until he was quite old!

Well in some ways it would be nicer to have a longer nap middle of the day - nicer for me so that I can get more done - plus I can see that this would have the effect of less need for the late afternoon nap. CarGirl - any idea how to get him to self-settle? I'm sure he can do it as he does it every night!

The only person who knows whether your son is tired and needs to nap is your son ... listen to him, he will tell you what he needs.

I would approach it when he is a month or so older by dropping the first nap (or only letting him have 10 mins in the buggy or car or something) and bringing the 2nd nap forward - he'll probaby have lunch something ridicuous like 10.30 for a while though. If he's more tired then he may wake after the 45 mins but put himself back to sleep quickly.