I have been thinking about trying for my third and last baby. I have two lovely boys and am very grateful to have two healthy children. If and when the time is right for number three I just wont a healthy one at full term. I had PE with the first and number two took 13 heartbreaking months to conceive. I didn?t think about what sex they would be while pregnant, even forgot to ask when number one was born! However it might be nice to have another female in the house to balance things out. I was wondering if anyone has ever tried any of the natural methods to try for a child of a certain sex? Eg shettles? I don?t really believe it works and sounds like an awful faff, especially as number 2 took so long to come along. Has anyone tried it or anything similar? Did it work?

Hi, we're expecting no.4 after 3 boys and we took the deliberate decision not to try and influence things, even though my view before conceiving was that all things being equal I'd like a girl. Now 19 weeks, and while I'm really keen to know the sex I really feel I'd be happy to have a boy or a girl. Decided not to try and influence because I don't believe it works - or at least you never know if it did or didn't - and because I didn't want to feel "disappointed" if we tried and "failed". I do know people go to fairly extreme lengths - diet, timing etc - but not for me. Also be aware that ttc a girl means you could be avoiding sex at ovulation and so could take longer? Age also a factor for me - I just feel v. grateful to be pregnant at all. Good luck whatever your decision!

Yes I did - but only for the first month of ttc as conceived straight away, having realised the first time round we'd inadvertantly done most of the things to get a boy. DD arrived 9m later but of course there is no way of really knowing if it works.

Thanks. Trying shettles for a girl does make the chances of not getting prenant all higher I guess. I did use ovulation test towards the end when trying for number 2 as I was getting desperate thinking I couldn't get pregnant. it did make ttc more stressful.

I used shettles as we have a DD and wanted a boy.

We timed it on ovulation (or just after actually) DH had a coffee before, I didn't eat any dairy for a while - there was other stuff that I didn't bother trying as it just seemed too 'out there' and guess what - 20wk scan revealed 'probably' another girl!! It was actually an ambiguous scan but I kind of knew beforehand that it was a girl.

DH a bit disappointed at the time but I'm really chuffed - would have been either way and he's up for it now knowing how much our DD1 is going to love baby 2.

I truely believe you get what you're given, no matter what you do.

I thought vaguely about trying to influence the dice by avoiding sex at ovulation to get a girl, but then it took longer to get pg than expected then I had a miscarriage. After that I was just desperate to get pg and decided I really didn't care what gender I got. The best way to get pg was to have as much sex as possible around ovulation, which would have suggested conceiving a boy. I got pg and apparently had done everything to get a boy, including position etc. Then 20w scan it was a girl.
Pg again now, had sex once and once only, on day of ov probably, and it's another girl.
I honestly think there's nothing in these methods and you get what you get. Although there was that research recently about eating bananas and conceiving a boy...

Oh yes, another thing, don't assume it will take as long to get pg with #3 as with #2! I've ended up with a bonkersly small age gap for my third because I made that assumption.

I just think why not. So long as it's a child you want, and not a girl (or a boy), why not do what you can - it can't hurt. Worth reading Hazel Chesterman Phillips (similar to Shettles but quite easy and accessible)- interesting if nothing else. There are plenty of examples in there of people who think the methods worked for them but of course not everyone's lucky.
For what it's worth we ate bananas, hubby wore boxers, had sex at ov and (so far) we are expecting a boy. Girls are harder as you have to avoid your most fertile times, but like others have said, you can't pin your hopes on it.

I think there's no harm in trying these methods, but not if they prevent/delay you getting pg (since ttc can be stressful if long drawn out). Esp since there are some theories that state the exact opposite ie have sex around ovulation to get a girl (can't remember the name of it, but www.in-gender.com has a feast of information).
Also once you even start to use these methods, then you're sort of investing emotionally in getting one sex or another.
BTw absolutely am not judging you for all things being equal wanting a girl, that's exactly how I felt with #2.

We have a DS and we would like a girl but as long as we have a healthy baby we really don't mind which sex we get.

We did try the things they say to concieve a girl. We didn't have sex on day I OV and we did missonary position. If it works it works if not then at least we have loads of clothes for another boy already.

We have 2 DDs and whilst a boy would have been nice we did nothing to influence it, we are having another DD, I guess we are just meant to have girls!

we tried, completely failed to conceive, gave up and ds4 was conceived in 4 weeks

a girl just aint gonna happen here

which is cool coz ds4 is rather lovely

Hazel Chesterman Phillips/Shettles did not work for us 4 times! Now with the first 2 boys, we weren't actually trying the method, but knowing when we had sex and when I usually ovulated, the timing for both should have been ideal for a girl. On ds3, we used the method to the letter including diet, etc and on ds4, we had mainly given up on the method, but the timing should still have been right for a girl.
So, in a word, No!

We tried it (shettles, not diet)...timing conception (my cycle was VERY accurate) for a boy and we had ds. So it worked for us.

Yeah we tried it a bit as have two DDs. Am PG now but don't know what it is. EXpect it will be a girl. EVeryone I know who has 2 girls then has another has another girl. It is written in the dead sea scrolls Ithink.

Before I was pregnant I really wanted it to be a boy. Now I genuinely don't care. Would find a girl easier, but a boy would be an adventure.

Well we didnt purposely use shettles but I keep track of my cycles as a method of contraception and fertility awareness.

DS was conceived on the night of ovulation - we were actually meant to be avoiding sex lol.

This time around we planned it but we both got thrush around ovulation time so were not having sex immediately on ovulation. I think it must have been perhaps three or four days prior to and recently found out baby is a girl.

But again could just be random luck!

xx

Hi all, thanks for the advice and congrats on all the new babys! It seems that there is not much it in then. I have ordered Hasel's book and will have a read. I would only try for another child. Good point about putting pressure on yourself to have a certain sex and being disappointed if it wasn‘t a girl, didn’t really think about that. I certainly would never want to risk that. I know that a healthy child is the most important thing so I think I might try it with the view that it was just for fun (not that ttc could ever be fun after number two - swore I wouldn't even look at my husband after that!!). I know what people say about feeling you can only have boys or girls. The experts say its still 50/50 chance despite the sex of previous children but it doesn't feel true. I feel like I can only have boys - not that I would ever complain

Sure, I would, but it also didn't work that way for me. I had a miscarriage, and I didn't want a much bigger gap between my children, and I'm getting on a bit, and found it harder to conceive the third time, so I threw all thoughts of that out of the window. I don't think it's bad to want one sex and to try for it; we end up loving our children the same either way, and it's not like doing some kind of genetic selection.

A friend tried to conceive a girl after having DS1. She did the diet and timing and DS2 popped out. Again she tried for a girl and guess what.. DS3p popped out! I have only ever conceived the day of ovulation and I have one girl and 2 boys. I get ovulation pains and our only method of contraception has been to avoid sex at that time and for 24 hours after. Lots of times have had sex just hours before OV pains started and never conceived. DH's sperm must die off very quickly as this is only method of contraception we have used in 13 years! So if we were to try Shettles for a girl it would never work!

Thanks tiny. I think that is true of me too. After trying 13 months for ds2 I guess I can only get pregnant at ovulation time. I am reading Hazel's book and some of things in there I can't relate very well too - like some parents getting very depressed when a boy turns up when they were desperate for a girl etc. So in a way the book is helpful in reasuring me that what I am considering is a third child - not a desperate last shot at a daughter. Still if I a do try for number three I will try the method - maybe for a few months but I can see myself not getting prenant at all if I followed it for too long

I used it. I have 2 of each I think it worked for dd2 but I think ds2 was just luck! I'm not really convinced that it can be that acurate.

It worked twice 4 me! Followed Dr shettles religiously for DS, just did the timing for DD.

But then again maybe it was just lucky! The scientific theory behind the timing makes sense though