not interested in reasons (be they personal) but just wondered what the children themselves thought

thanks

My sister (middle child) wasn't sent to private school and my brother and I were for some or all of our school years.

She uses it to get more money out my parents for fun things like shoes, clothes etc (she is now 15) but isn't bothered by it. My parents however regret not sending her private.

My middle brother went to private school for a while, and I did for 6 form. I'd do the same if necessary - getting the right school for the right child. Didn't bother any of us at all - don't think we even thought about it. We all went to good schools.

My friend wasn't but her older brother was. Her family moved to an area with a good local school when it was time for her to go to secondary. Her brother was sitting his highers, so he stayed at private.

She still has a chip on her shoulder about it 25 years later.

My big brother, myself and my sister all attended grammar school.

My little brother went to private boarding school.

None of us had a problem with that.

Similarly my dh went to private day school while his big brother and 2 sisters went to state schools.

None of them appear to be bothered either.

Not us, but I know two couples who have done this.

One couple sent girl to local, very good girl's comp and boy further afield to private boys school. Both kids absolutely fine about it.

Other couple sent oldest son to private school (very bright, sensitive, socially awkward - they were worried he'd be bullied at large local comp). Second son much more ribust type - sent to comp and thrived.

also know families who have made this decision based on the needs of the children in question, and it has worked out fine

My brother went from a state primary to a private prep at aged 8, mainly because of his wild behaviour and the state's school inability to cope/deal with it. He thrived in a smaller class with a stricter regime.

I stayed at the state primary and was very happy there, have never had an issue with the fact that he had a private education as it was always explained to me why.

I went to a state school and enjoyed it, my brother went and it didn't suit him so he went to a private day school that was also a choir school. Worked out well for us and I would have no qualms about doing the same for my children.

I think it depends on the reason for doing it.

I had a friend at school whose only brother was sent to private school but the girls were all sent to the local Comp. Her father did this because he didn't think there was any point spending his money on educating girls!!!

I may be doing this in September - ds has failed his 11 plus by 1 mark (I'm appealing), is dyslexic and the school he was offered was totally unsuitable with appalling behaviour and very poor teaching according to Ofsted. Dds 1 and 2 are at grammar school and are doing well there. I don't think I should have to pay and it's really up to the LEA to provide a decent school place for my son so will fight all they way.

Different needs for different children but I'll make sure I work to cover fees so that the others don't miss out on holidays and all the extra stuff we do.

Personally would never do this. Think it's a recipe for sibling conflict. Even if there are good reasons for choosing private school for one and not another e.g. behaviour or one is particularly sporty or whatever you are still investing financially in one child in a way you're not in the other.

i have so far, ds2 only started reception at state school in sept and i am considering leaving him there if he is happy. ds1 we moved for the same state to private just over a yr ago. t suits him much better and is finally happy. no idea what they feel about it but i feel guilty and also its a pita collecting from 3 different places (inc dd at playschool). i suspect when we can comfortably afford to send the other two as well we prob will

very interesting, thanks everyone

My big sister went to grammer school but the rest of us went private. I think the grammers had all been abolished by the time we went, but in any case I know my parents weren't very happy about my big sister's experiences. Ironically she did the best at university time (she went to Oxford) but I think that's because a) she went to a crammer for her retakes and b) she's probably the most academic in the family. I don't think there was any resentment as we all went to different schools for secondary. She's certainly never mentioned it, and I'm sure she would if it annoyed her!

a friend of mine went to a state school while her siblings went to private schools because her parents couldn't afford to send her too. She's never really quite got over it, and it caused her lots of self-esteem issues, even tho she went to uni and is doing well in her career.
I'd do it in the same sort of situation as swedishmum tho I think.

dh went to independent secondary
his 5 siblings didn't - lots of problems between them (not dh) and comments on subsequent careers choices (or not) and options even now 25 years later

My bro went private and I went to a comp. We did drift apart quite markedly after that point (we're only two years apart and had previously been quite close). I remember feeling a bit abandoned, as we had been at the same state primary - but I think that was more to do with him going to an all-boys school (at which I obv. could not join him) than the fact that it was private. I don't remember feeling any resentment at the fact of it being private. However, my parents have had quite a lot of guilt about it over the years, and insisted on giving us a deposit for our first house as a way of 'making up' the fees they hadn't paid for me.

My db went to boarding school and I stayed at home at went to comp. My Dad was in the RN and away quite a bit, so it was to provide db with male role models.

The only bit that pissed me off was that he came home and Mum got horribly over excited wittering on about how her baby was coming home. Now he lives 25 minutes away from her and I am 12 hours and the channel away, and I think she gets horribly over excited about me going home, so what goes around, comes around.

I did better academically than him and didn't want to board, so felt no great pain at not going and don't resent it now. Having proof read his MSc dissertation last week, I am shocked that having had an expensive private education, his spelling, grammar and punctuation are quite so appalling!

I'm one of four - the first two (I'm pfb) went private, the second two to a (very good) local state (not our most local comp)
I recently asked my little sister if she was ever bothered by it - she looked at me as if I was bonkers. She pointed out that she finds exams stressful as it is, & would have hated any more pressure. My little brother (state) who is probably the cleverest of all of us is also very happy with his school & feels he got more out of being in the state system.

Fwiw, all four of us have attended good universities & done reasonably 'well' in material/life balence type ways. We are all reasonably close.

My older two are in a private school, and my younger three are in a state school. They will all go in the course of time, when they get to Y7. DD1 will join me at my school in September.

I think it can cause family problems if children aren't treated the same and there was this horrible sexist tradition in this country as Q mentions to spend money on boys' education but not girls as girls would only marry and have children anyway and not work (which actually is what a good few mumsnetters do so perhaps it's an appropriate tradition!).

What would be interesting would be to chart a big sample of sibilings one of whom went to state school and one private and see how by say age 50 things like their income level, accent, hobbies, career success turned out.

DC1 (DD) went to private secondary. DC3 (DS2) went to private Juniors. DS1 and DS3 went to state schools.

In our case we got Assisted Places and the 2 that went were the right age at the time. DS1 went to one primary and one secondary. DS2 and DS3 both changed schools for Y3. DS3's new school was a state school but not the same one the others went to.

I'm a firm believer in the right school for each child rather than one size fits all.

Or even how happy they are Xenia !!

I am the yougest of four and we all went to the local comp but I left after the first year to go private
The reason was my brother had just only got 4 gcses and my parents decided the school wasn't as good as it used to be
There isn't really any resentment , not that i know of

one of my sister's never went to uni and she lived at home until she got married at 29. My eldest sis often said she was being financially subsidised (ie low rent) and the other sister (the one living at home) used to say back - 'well you all went to uni and got money from our parents then'

I went to the local comp, as did db1. Db2 went to private school.

I hated local comp; he hated private. He got moved to the comp, I had to stay put. I remember at the time my parents told me they were sending him to private school and I was devastated - I was desperate to go to private school. It may not have been the answer to my problems (bright and got bullied for wanting to work hard, which I guess I would have swapped for the bitchiness of an all-girls school) but nevertheless it didn't do my relationship with my parents any good at the time.

I should add though; in the long term I don't think it made much difference to me - I don't harbour any grudges now.

I know a family where the pfb (male) went private, the girls all went state

Not sure of the reasons but it certainly caused issues

Please don't do it.
My brother was sent to a private shcool (he sat the entrance exam as his state primary teacher thought he had a chance of a scolarship he just missed out but my mum and dad decided to make the sacrifice and send him any way) while I went to the local not very good comprehensive.

This still affects our relationship to this day, I feel furious that my parents treated us differently and my abiding memory of our childhood is parents working long hours and not beeing around much inorder to pay for his school fees.

I did fine at the local comp and would even venture that in the end it made me a more rounded person with an understanding of the real world he will never have.

Having been hot housed and pushed accademically from a young age he now doesn't have the slightest interest in the wider world or learning for the pure joy of it, something I have always had.

Sadly history is repeating itself as he has chosen to send dcs private while mine are thriving at their wonderful local state school and very much part of their local community.

The injustice of beeing treated differently is always there and also affected my relationship with my parents.

Give all children in a family equal opportunities or you risk fracturing your family and storing up a can of worm for the future.

Maltloafeater - if it made you a more rounded person than him, surely that means YOU were given the better education? If you you are happy to send your children to state schools, why do you resent him having gone private?
I am interested in the various views on this form those who have been through it, as we have two Dc. We have been told the elder would be a cinch for only local grammar.
The younger would be borderline, so we would have to send him private, as the local secondary school would not suit him.We figured that it might cause resentment later between them. So they will both go private, and we just accept that the fees we are paying for DS1 are worth paying to avoid a potential wedge in their relationship , whcih is very good, and which is the most precious thing to us.

'so we would have to send him private' there is no have to, it is your choice not some thing you HAVE to do.

Accademically my education was poor, but I have made up for it by grasping opportunities I have been offered with both hands and working dammed hard rather than being fed by silver spoon which sadly is the attitude I see in many privately educated adults.

I also think it's nice for siblings to attend the same school - adds to the community feel of a school plus you know each other's teachers and friends, it's something you have in common. I think sending them to different schools can create divisions.

I didn't really hang around with my sister & brother at school but it was nice to know they were there, particularly when there was an issue with bullying.

I was the only one of five siblings that did not go to a private secondary school as I passed the 11+ and went to a very good grammar school. I had gone to a private school from Yr 3 to Yr 6. All except one of us spent some time at state schools and some at private.

My eldest ds went to a private secondary school, having passed the very difficult entrance exam, ds 2 took the exam and went to a very good comp - when we had dd 15 years later we made the decision not send her privately and she went to what we thought was a good comp, found out that it wasn't, moved house and she is now at an excellent school.

I have never felt jealous of the fact I didn't spend as long at a private school as the rest of my siblings and my children seem to be happy with where they have been to school.

My daughter is at a private school and her two stepbrothers are at a state school. In all probability this will not change throughout all the children's school career.

My father, his two brothers and one of his sisters went to private (boarding) schools. His other sister went to a state grammar.

My father's younger brother sent his eldest son to a state grammar school and his three other children to private (boarding) school.

I don't think it is necessarily a big deal if all siblings don't go to the same type of school, but there need to be valid supporting reasons.

My daughter is at a private school and her two stepbrothers are at a state school. In all probability this will not change throughout all the children's school career.

My father, his two brothers and one of his sisters went to private (boarding) schools. His other sister went to a state grammar.

My father's younger brother sent his eldest son to a state grammar school and his three other children to private (boarding) school.

I don't think it is necessarily a big deal if all siblings don't go to the same type of school, but there need to be valid supporting reasons.

Policywonk - Interesting. My DS1 keeps telling me he's going to pay me back for his school fees. Not that I ask him to - just he's very aware it costs a huge amount of money. Being nosy - do you think your brother would have rather had the comp ed and the deposit on his first house? Or is he proud of his alma mater?

Oh, he would have preferred anything to SPs - he absolutely hated it there, was very socially isolated, bullied and felt not up to scratch academically (bro was very clever but not much of a grafter, and the constant testing wore him down). And yes, these days he's quite grasping, money-wise, and so probably thinks he got the sticky end of the stick all round!

However, it would be a different kettle of fish if he had enjoyed school. Your DS sounds lovely - I'd never have been so conscientious about money at school age (in fact I'm probably still not, even now).

'sticky end of the stick'

y'know what I mean

We all went to private schools but my brother's was more academic and my sister's and mine was much smaller and didn't even have things like a choir. My parents chose our school because I was very shy, I think but I probably would have been better at another school with more girls like I was but it certainly didn't rankle. I think that's just my personality, that meant it didn't and for some people unless they are treated exactly the same it's a problem. In general though I think it's best to try to treat children equally.

Step families are a huge issue if one branch is getting a good private school education and another lot aren't.

We would love my stepsons to go to the same school as my daughter... but their mother won't here of it (she wouldn't be the one paying, either)

hear

I wasn't really meaning you because France is different anyway,. Just you sometimes get new partner who are very against private education. It can be a controversial issue particularly if their children are languishing in the state system.

I think it's just one of myriad issues (though one of the bigger issues, perhaps) of parity of treatment in step / blended families.

On a similar note, my parents paid for years of piano & clarinet lessons for me and didn't offer it to my sister & brother, no idea why. I think they labelled me as 'musical', which is rubbish (I'm not and anyway, you don't have to be musical to play the piano). But i'm very grateful I can now play the piano and my sister and brother regret not being able to play an instrument.

a school that is right for one child, might not be for another

Snora - yes, that's right. Children are all different - which can be a very good reason for sending them to different schools.

I think you need to try to ensure that each child believes that they are getting parity of treatment in their education overall as compared with siblings, and the best option for him/her as an individual. Which is not easy, and probably the easiest route is to send children to the same school.

Surely it is best if you go / your child goes to the school that suits best - which may not be the same for siblings who are not carbon copies of each other ? Also, why would you tell your children this ? FWIW, my elder sister and I went to a grammar school that was 'direct grant' (so some money had to be paid) but my brother and younger sister's schools were free. I can honestly say I was never aware of this throughout my schooling, and well into adulthood (that my parents had been paying out some money for 2 of us to attend school and not the others). I was brought up that it's not polite to dicuss money in company.

Maybe not at primary level but I think that most children of secondary age are aware that some schools cost a lot of money and which schools those are. I don't think that counts as discussing money.

Policyw - SPs would be too old school for my liking. I think it's perfectly possible to teach latin and ancient history to boys wearing 100% polyester blazers (available for a tenner from the school's second hand shop).

Horrible that your brother was bullied.

- yes, it does (or at least did) seem to rather revel in its nineteenth-century attitudes.

Sorry, that grin was at the polyester blazers, not my bro getting bullied.

I was bullied too at my comp! Rough girls spat at me! Some of them pulled my hair too. But I like to think that it prepared me for office life.

When we moved recently we sent our eldest private (secondary) and intended to put the younger two in State primary then move them to the same school for secondary. However, it was clear from early on that the private school was a really nice place to be, and as it goes all the way through from pre-school to Y12 we have ended up putting them all there. It has financial implications but I think that I would have felt very uncomfortable sending 2 children to a school that I felt wasn't as good as the one their older brother was going to.

I went private from 3 to 18, my sisters went State - they got better A levels but I got a better degree

LL - Are they older or younger? If they are younger, you need to measure your A level results against their results using the grade inflation formula.

Love it, they are 10 and 12 years younger

I always knew I was cleverererer

My big sis went to local comp. She was very keen to go, but was very unhappy in later years there.

I got assisted place to local private school so went there (my sis refused to sit exam).

My little bro boarded at private school cos of divorce/family issues.

I was happy enough at school, and whilst lazy did enough (was forced to do enough) to go on to university etc.

After initial period db was happy boarding. It was a good school and gave him some much needed stability at the time.

Big sis definitely has a chip on shoulder about the whole thing. She doesn't feel she fulfilled potential or had opportunities I did. (Which is true)

However, I think this is largely due to the fact the comp. she did go to was a crap one (we were in middle of nowhere so there really was no choice). Effectively she was bullied for being bright and reasonably hardworking. This was then not helped by fact school was not set-up to cope with brighter/more academic pupils - so for example she couldn't do French, Geography and Biology O levels - If she did Geog and Bio they could only fit Childcare, Metalwork or Technical Drawing in not french.....

So,yes it did cause her problems but I think if she had gone to a good state school this wouldn't be the case.

xenia the point about boys and girls education and how boys get sent to private education and girls dont has no relevance to me as i dont have any boys

My friend has 4 children, eldest boy got a scholarship to private boarding school...a few ructions there as every holidays was "my baby is coming home" and dashing down at weekends to "be supportive" (although I think he was more embarassed than anything) and the other 3 got a bit miffed, and the holidays were a constant power struggle when the boy was home...so she moved the family down to near his school and the next eldest got a scholarship to a music school...he is a fab singer BUT they are now so poor the other 2 children have second hand clothes and shoes and are sent to the local school, have had to give up their dance and football lessons. I asked my friend if this might not cause a tad of resentment between the children and she said "oh, I just tell them their brothers have talent and they don't"
ARG!
I don't think the private/state issue is the main one here but it is not helping!
I feel so sorry for the youngest two, especially the little girl as she is a good dancer.
When I looked at private school for my DD a friend said "don't do it unless you can afford to send any subsequent children there", and several people since have said that to me too.

thats seems really unfair.

my best friend's oldest boy got a scholraship to a very expensive local private school (he's now at uni).

Her dd1 went to a different private school - local too, but in the other direction.

Her dd2 has just started at local state secondary school - her choice. her mum has told her that as long as she stays in the top streams, she can stay at the state school.

Her dd3 has develpmental issues and will alwys be within the state system.

School runs were a logistical nightmare at her house!

It seems from all these examples that it's not clear cut.

We may well have this problem if very academic DS1 gets a scholarship to go private. None of the others seem to be as able academically as he is, and there is no way on earth we could even begin to afford school fees for them (the fact that we are not at all rich actually works in our favour for means-tested bursaries for DS1). We don't know what to do and whether the others will feel resentful if they don't go. If I think they would be happy at a private school, I'm secretly hoping they will turn out to be sporting or artistic geniuses and that we will keep being so relatively poor that we qualify for help.

FWIW, I went private for the last 3 years of school while my brother didn't. But when he was offered the chance to go to a private 6th form he didn't want to because the local 6th form college was so good and all his friends were going. He got better A levels than me but not a better degree. I don't think he has ever resented it (but maybe I should check!).

Policyw - . But v funny about it preparing you for office life. My two big sons have been/one is being bullied. They're clever, witty, sporty, self-deprecating, self-reliant and kind and I'm pretty certain it's the latter two qualities that sets them up as bullying targets. I too was bullied; I keep telling them they inherited their being bullied from me and they should be grateful they haven't also inherited my thunder thighs.

My parents sent my brothers to private junior schools, and the elder to private senior. The reason for the difference was that the elder db was disabled and there was no sport provision for him in the state sector in those days. As the accident afterthought later on, I had to take my chance with state thoughout, though I did sit (and fail) a private school entry exam at 11. However as in the end I went to a direct grant grammar senior school, (as close to private as state education gets really), it's db2 who has the most grounds for resentment, but I don't think he is.

I sent DS1 to an independent school (he received a bursary award) at 11 whereas his younger brother carried on in state education until he was 16 - he is now at an independent sixth form. DS2 wasn't bothered about this until friends got at him and told him that it wasn't fair. We couldn't afford to send two to independents at the same time. DS1's school was exactly the right school for a very academic student but the other local independents were either very snobbish or no better academically than our village comprehensive.

Hardly anyone went to private school where I was growing up (perhaps it's a north/south thing?) but a family we were very close to were told by the primary school that their eldest children were very bright and would benefit from it. Both children duly got scholarships to very academic private schools and the parents spend more than they could afford on fees. The eldest, a boy, felt dislocated from all his friends and incredibly ashamed about his home not being 'as good' as others at the school. He tried to compensate by going over the top to get in with the in-crowd. He became an alcoholic, never really got over it and has never been to uni or held down a job, he’s about 40. The second, a girl, rebelled against the academic pressure by not bothering. She got 2 Es at A-level and a place on a bit of a noddy degree through clearing. She's happy and a lovely person but has never had the 'graduate job' that the private education promised, she's in her late-30s. When it got to the third child the parents were a bit disillusioned with it all so he went to the local bog-standard comp with me. He really enjoyed it, had lots of friends, got straight As at A-level, a 1st from a good Uni and has the professional job.

Clearly that doesn’t happen to everyone (DH thrived as a scholarship boy at a major public school) but it has made me a bit wary about dislocating children from their peers and focusing on the fact that they are bright….

My BIL went to a private school. DH and SIL went to the local comprehensive. MIL always banging on about how marvellous private school was and how dreadful comprehensive was. DH and BIL got same A level results. DH went to Imperial College, BIL to Cambridge. DH still feels a bit second best

I suspect it's how it's handled by the parents. MIL so vocally prefers BIL's education, that DH's achievements have been comprehensively overshadowed.

Haven't read the whole thread but my dad had this - he went to state sec modern and his step brothers went to private schools and he has the biggest chip on his shoulder about it!

Dh went to private school on a bursary and his brothers to 'not the best' state schools. There is a difference between them which goes beyond academic achievement and the work they do. It is never a problem really though and they all get on very well.

I think that's an important factor, how you as parents react to the whole thing. dh got a scholarship to a public school where he did stand out like a bit of a sore thumb, but did make friends and did well academically. His sisters didn't pass the scholarship exam and went to the local (not very good) comp. There was never a question of my ILs paying for them to go private as they didn't have the cash (dh's scholarship was 90% fees). I don't think the ILs made a big deal about the whole thing, it was just accepted that dh was bright and that the scolarship was fab. No one else in his family valued education much anyway - he still gets grief from his wider family about being a layabout (ie going to university) when everyone else started work at 16.

In my family we all went to the same (state)primary school and then different secondary schools. We were all involved in the choices and felt that (on the whole) the schools were chosen for us as individuals. I think that's important (also fo me it was nice not being called my sister's names!).

nooka - I think your view is the most compelling so far. Disregarding the state/private issue, I know a family with 6 children, and all are/have been at different secondary schools, ableit all independent - some of them have changed during their school career, so the family have the best view of independent education in SW London, havinf experienced vitrtually all the local schools! The point is the parents chose the schools for each indivdual child, and they seem like a very happy well balanced family, with all valued for their individuality. I ma impressed that the paretns had the energy, even with 6 to look so carefully at the choice of school, I must admit I would prefer mine at the same school just for convenience of sports days etc.

Both my brothers went to a private school at secondary level, while my sister and I went to a state school.

We always used to try and dress it up as a "Pah, you clearly do not believe in te education of women" story to annoy my very liberal parents. In fact the schools were very closely related - the boys grammar had gone independent and the girls grammar had gone comprehensive. The schools mixed a reasonable amount and there were a lot of families with children at both. I think they may have migrated a bit in different directions since my time. They were also both Catholic schools and my parents strongly felt that we should go to Catholic schools.

I think in circumstances where there are obvious reasons like that it really is a non issue.

Interestingly out of the four of us, the one who performed best academically by a long chalk went to the comprehensive - but it was far more to do with personality and raw ability than the teaching available at either.

TFM, no-one should be made to feel second best by "only" getting into Imperial College - your MIL sounds barking mad . Does she know that it's often rated above Oxford and Cambridge for many of its departments? Or will she just not be told?

<Spot the IC graduate, btw >

(Sorry for hijack; I can't add to the debate much, all my dcs are at private schools - come September it will be 2 different secondary schools and one primary)

I can't add to the discussion much as both my sons are at private schools. However, they are at different ones. One school is highly academic and competitive and the other is completely the opposite. There was no question of them both 'fitting' the same school.

What I'm trying to say is whether you are paying or not is not the point. If the school is the best on for the child then there is no argument.

My sister and I were both adopted - from different children's homes.

My sister went to a private school that specialised in dance (adopted mother loves ballet).
I went to the local comprehensive.
It just convinced her even more that she was really special and vastly superior to me in every way.

When she had friends round from school she would tell me not to come and talk to them because I only went to a "common comprehensive".

Suffice to say, I have not had any contact with her for the last 20 years other than one very abusive e-mail which arrived out of the blue accusing me of pushing her out of the family.

I am from the North and we all went to private day schools. We know twins one of whom went to a boarding school and the other a day private school. I think it was their choice. At one point my ex husband wanted our son to board and I did not want that difference between him and the other children so that didn't happen. It was the right decision.

I think most parents try to treat children equally. I certainly often talk to the older 3 about that issue and they know I try to be fair. For example I am paying for all 3 at university. My father paid for the 3 of us too there but hte fact my brother did medicine (longer course) in a sense you might say is unfair but I never felt that to be so. I supported my daughter for an extra year or two as well but that doesn't mean I'll dole out the equivalent cash to those that do shorter courses.

Xenia's Liverpool childhood, before her Mum's Jackpot win at the Bingo

Jura

Obviously, to we cogniscenti, the merits of Imperial are unparalleled, but Oxbridge, in terms of social cachet for MIL...

And BIL read History, not Engineering, which is apparently also better, for some reason

I spent the last half of my childhood in Norway. At 14 I didn´t want to follow the Norwegian education system anymore, and so I started at the International School. My brother continued his whole high school education at the Norwegian schools.
He was perfectly happy - my parents would not have been able to afford to send both of us to the international school, but my brother had no interest in going & was happy where he was.

Sorry to hear about your sons Swedes. I think bullying (the sort that thankfully doesn't lead to huge psychological trauma in the bullied) is rather common. At the risk of sounding like someone who was sent to boarding school at the age of 2, it never did me any harm

PP - I would not beat yourself up too much. I think the fact that one child is being offered a scholarship that will not cost you much is a bit different to just choosing to send one child and not the others based on favouritism/ sex/ whatever. When they are older I think that they would see the rationale for your decision.

christie

To be honest, nailpolish, she was never nice to me. Gave me all sorts of hangups about being overweight that have stayed with me to this day.
I can't say that I miss her at all in fact I wouldn't know what to say to her now if I did see her.

She's not someone I want my children to spend time with.