He always does this. He insists on doing everything himself then turns my home into a very messy building site for months on end.

There's always some reason, unexpected work cropping up, kids being demanding ...

All his jobs go so far over schedule and what really annoys me is that when I dare to gingerly mention it or ask what the new projected timescale is now we've crossed two deadlines, he gets all huffy and defensive.

I wish he'd just hire a fucking man to get the job done and have done with it.

could you do hire someone? <<fm not stirring honestly>>

I was sorely tempted while he was away these last few days. The problem is he's halfway through a construction job and I doubt anyone would do it, erm, quite like he is doing it shall we say. So they'd be unwilling to take over.

have to go sorry pc time about to expire will check back soon xxx

have to go sorry pc time about to expire will check back soon xxx

Oh my dh is like this! No-one could ever do as good a job as he could

My kitchen took four years to finish and after that I forbid him to even attempt to do the bathroom

Spidermama, sounds like you've married my dh! Because of the way he is, we were without central heating for nearly 2 years, with no bathroom for a couple of months and no kitchen for several months. He's a complete fucking nightmare to get things done, and like you say he's always got some excuse for not getting on with what needs to be done and gets all arsey when you bring it up...
My dear I have no solution, just a lot of sympathy for you.Of course you do know that he won't accept you paying someone to get the job done as he's got pride and doesn't trust anyone else to do things properly.

At the moment we have little things that have to be sorted around the house (we're trying to sell it) but I just know he'll never get around to do any of the, so we just have to accept a lower offer toi make up for it.

(((( HUGS ))))

Ah thanks for your support girls. It's good to know I'm not alone.

I am like this - it can take me six months to decorate a room. Just finished the living room which I think I started by painting the ceiling last November! Try not to stress about it these things do eventually get finished.

Who am I confusing Spidermama with?

<thought spidermama was a LP>

My dp is a self employed jack of all trades. Jobs ALWAYS run on. I suggest that he thinks of a timescale when estimatign and then quadruple it cos that's how long it will ACTUALLY take. Orders turn up and they're wrong, customers change their mind or else add things on.....

Not one room in my house is finished, and I've had it 5 years. I did as much as I could but have not the skills to do more.

We have an alabatross a property we're doing up to sell, but it's taking YEARS. I've stripped/sanded/painted where I could, and I'm still waiting for the all clear to go back and do more work in rooms, but need him to clear them of all the crapola that's in them, so that I can actually get in to work. I can't move the stuff as a lot is too heavy, where would I put it and I daren't interfere with his 'system'.

Because of all the stress that working to survive and finding time to work on property he is not interested in bd, we are both shattered every night and I see my chances of having another child slipping away....

So no, yanbu but perhaps a little overoptimistic! At least you know from other pp that you are not alone, we can commiserate together

Who's LP Squalor?

lone parent, I'm mixing you up with someone else though obviously or dh wouldn't be in trouble

(YANBU BTW)

I have given up haranguing. I just hire a bloke in and don't tell him these days.

He hates it at first and then comes round when he realises they are paid to be experts and he, er, is not.

I would hire out and get the job done properly

1) there is a guarantee if the job falls apart <<and DH can gloat >>
2) if you want to sell later on, the job will at least have lasted and be done properly... you can pick up bad diy so easily and it does put buyers off...

Spidermama - No YANBU, but a little naive . Mine does the same. You mention 'getting a man in' and my h acts as if you have insulted his manliness. The thing is, I KNOW he can do the job and to a very high standard too - it is just that it; takes 5 times as long, causes rows as ds and I get in the way, makes h miserable and causes his valuable days off to be wasted. It really does my head in.

About one year ago, we had the hakk and landing painted by a professional. It took two days and was done brilliantly. H had no stress, I had no stress and it looked good.

you must be very proud of your lovely hakk

My hakk is a work of art, unlike my typing

Oh to get my hakk painted.......

It is very satisfying

sounds like the cobblers children to me

Threaten if he doesn't do it you will not get a man in you will diy it yourself.... that should get him moving - if it doesn't sneak a man ain and take the credit!!

my father was like this and it drove us all nuts

when the house was finally more or less finished after about 25 years, they SOLD it (and then the buyers completely redid it anyway)

so YANBU
I do the DIY in our house now thank goodness (I learnt a lot over those 25 years...mainly about how NOT to do things)

I heard of a couple who hosted a 'wardrobe doors party' when he finally completed the job, 20 years after starting to install fitted wardrobes. They invited the entire street to come and look!