Another new thread! By the time this one runs out we might have some babies!!! Although, we do chat a lot so maybe not...

Yeppee new and hopefully last thread! Looks like I am fine with my pasteurised camembert. Might stop just to be on the safe side though

Link:

http://www.medic8.com/healthguide/articles/listeria.html

I am second! Wooooo!

Right, I have literally two hours work to do on our mega deadline - only prob - I'm waiting for someone to finish with the relevant work first so am now hanging around waiting. Grrrrr.

Have also just realised I am so tired I can barely keep my eyes open. Need to find a sofa at work for a sneaky nap!

Good thread title dq!

Needahand re cheese - you can always have brie etc as 'cheese on toast' - that way it's been heated through and should be safe.

apparently if it is made from pasteurised mild it is ok. I think I might be able to restraint myself for two months or like you suggested GF might cook it.

Would definitely have a sneaky nap if I were you

i also read that as long as it was pastuerised it was fine but my dr flipped a lid when i told her i'd been eating it so i did some more research and read only cooked. who knows, i've been pretty relaxed with that stuff this time around and i think french women probably eat them all the time!!

Yippee a new thread- have decided we are the chattiest bunch of ante-natalers ever!!

Re: SPD and crutches- I have been putting off getting them for the last four weks- we live in a town house and I have a bouncy dog and I just think it would be a recipe for disaster! Plus I have a walking stick which seems to get me through, and spend a LOT of time resting (bouncy dog notwithstanding!)

I ordered a few BF tops from Jojo- they look less like BF tops than the ones you get from Blooming Marvellous- to help me get through the first few weeks until I get used to it, then will wear lots of shirts/tshirts etc and flash my boobs a lot! I also ordered a couple of pairs of summer weight maternity trousers on the grounds that every post-baby woman I have worked for has been in maternity gear for a good few weeks post-birth, and I keep hoping the weather will warm up.

Ernest- agree with the rest- you are my 'mum-idol'. HAve lost the choc recipe you gave us though....could you email it? (like you don't already have enough to do !)

Nice thread title, surely at least some of the babies will arrive before we're forced into starting a Cheggers-related thread .

Sophie, thanks for the crutch info. My SPD is also a bit one-sided, but the physio has shown me a scary pulling exercise thingy that my husband's been doing to pull my left hip back down into the right place. Seems to be making walking easier, so still optimistic I might avoid the crutches [fingers crossed emoticon].

allipalli, I'd suggest going along to the physio even if you're doing a bit better now. They should be able to give you tips to stop you doing anything that could make it worse, which could mean you might well avoid any pain at all for the rest of the pregancy or afterwards (as I understand it can take several months for the ligaments to return to normal).

Cross-posted with makecakes - thanks for the info I will post my findings if I end up having to use the damned things.

Due to exhaustion, haven't posted recently, but want to share some good news with you all - mortgage application has been approved!!! I was convinced it wouldn't happen with all the recent news stories, so really happy now. However the huge delay does mean that we probably won't be able to move into new place until the last week of June (EDD 12 June), am I mad....?

BTW Drama Queen: "By the time this one runs out we might have some babies!!!" That is really scary.....

Just over another 4 weeks until mat leave - really wish it was next week....

Just saying hello to get on to threads I'm on.

PP sorry you are feeling exhausted but good news re mortgage.

Yes scary to think those babies are going to be here sooner rather than later (hopefully later for me)

Re SPD: my physio also puts my pelvis back in place. Very excruciating when she does but it usually fixes me up for 2 or 3 weeks if I don't overdo things.

Definitely with the jojo BF tops makescake they nearly look "normal". I did BF DD for a while and pretty much everywhere but I have never been too keen to flash any flesh so I love these tops. I also used to like wearing vests with crossover tops, that way you can lift the vest a bit and no one sees anything

Can't claim credit for title - it was josey's idea!

makecakes as you'll be one of the first to pop you'll have to trial the bf tops that are out there and then post some feedback .

PP - that's great news on the mortgage front. You are a bit mad for moving and having a baby in the same month but I'm sure ernest will give some tips!

Ucake thanks for advice on the other thread re inconclusive test. I think you probably are right there might be various reasons. I did think about contamination but as you pointed out there might be a lot more reasons.

PP- that's great news re mortgage application. As for the move, well you will have a good excuse not to do anything and just supervise! It will be probably be extremely tiring moving then but I'm sure you'll get through it and the excitement of being in a new home with your new little bundle will make up for the hard work.

Can't keep up with all the chat at the moment, anyone would think we have nothing better to do than obsess about babies!!!!! I really can't believe we are all in the final stages now. I saw my midwife yesterday and my bloods were good, no anaemia so now constipation inducing iron tablets for me (hurrah). BP was still low, wouldn't have been if it was tested the day before as I was v stressed about work. Baby is still head down and facing towards my back - I hope it stays there and is not just teasing me by being in the right position right up until the end when it will do a sudden flip! Worst thing was the midwife described the baby as being 'Head down and ready for exit' - NOT YET PLEASE!!!!! I think she just meant it was in a good position but it's not really what you want to hear. After my fall on Sunday and subsequent 24 hour paranoid twinge and knicker watch I think I am going to pack my hospital bag this weekend. I'm determined not to take too much this time round - poor dh could hardly lift the bags last time .

Ernest - you are our hero and inspiration and whenever I feel a bit tired and lazy I think of how much you have to do and give myself a kick up the backside to do whatever small thing I am putting off. I know you must be really stressed but just think about 1 day at a time or 1 hour at a time it that makes it easier to get through.

PP- that's great news re mortgage application. As for the move, well you will have a good excuse not to do anything and just supervise! It will be probably be extremely tiring moving then but I'm sure you'll get through it and the excitement of being in a new home with your new little bundle will make up for the hard work.

Can't keep up with all the chat at the moment, anyone would think we have nothing better to do than obsess about babies!!!!! I really can't believe we are all in the final stages now. I saw my midwife yesterday and my bloods were good, no anaemia so now constipation inducing iron tablets for me (hurrah). BP was still low, wouldn't have been if it was tested the day before as I was v stressed about work. Baby is still head down and facing towards my back - I hope it stays there and is not just teasing me by being in the right position right up until the end when it will do a sudden flip! Worst thing was the midwife described the baby as being 'Head down and ready for exit' - NOT YET PLEASE!!!!! I think she just meant it was in a good position but it's not really what you want to hear. After my fall on Sunday and subsequent 24 hour paranoid twinge and knicker watch I think I am going to pack my hospital bag this weekend. I'm determined not to take too much this time round - poor dh could hardly lift the bags last time .

Ernest - you are our hero and inspiration and whenever I feel a bit tired and lazy I think of how much you have to do and give myself a kick up the backside to do whatever small thing I am putting off. I know you must be really stressed but just think about 1 day at a time or 1 hour at a time it that makes it easier to get through.

Yeah fresh thread cant see it lasting us lot though

PP great news of the mortgage application.

Im not going to buy nursing tops just now as I failed bismally last twice I dont think its worth the money for 6 weeks....I will prob buy some loose T-shirt tops from Tesco/Asda or the 3 for £12 out of DPs

All the talk of cakes is giving me the urge to bake....Its carrot cake I have a thing for though and Ive never made it before.

I have to say Im really angry with DHs work...since October he has been working in foreign seas and each month he has phoned and said my pay cant be right..each time he has been told no we assure you its right we wont be chasing you for any back in a few months...ha frigging ha just as he was on the way out to the airport we get the post with a "we regret to inform you due to human error we have(f**ked uo your wages)" and we will just take X amount hundreds starting next week...which is likely going to have to have him cancel his holidays for the time baby is due so we have enough spare cash to correct their cockup....sorry for ranting but I hope the dumb cow gets the sack...It has also taken them 4months to pay his expenses for 1 month as they couldnt pay into his bank account kept sending it to someone with the same name grrr Im mad.

Josey - that is awful news re your dh pay, especially when you have tried to bring it to their attention. Can they not take out less for a longer period to make life easier for you?

As for carrot cake, Delia does a fantastic carrot cake recipe. I'd never made it before until a few weeks ago then thought I would have a crack at it. It has a scary long list of ingredients but is very easy to make and is sooooooo impressive. I'm planning to bake it whenever I want to impress people as it really does taste sooo good.

Josie that is awful. I agree with Josey, I think your DH should have been consulted on the repayments. I think he should pick this up with them and mention that you are expecting a baby and that the timing is very inconvenient and could they please take less money over a longer period of time. Make sure he mentions that he drew this to their attention several times and that it was their error and that as a result it is quite unfair to put you in a delicate situation at this important time. Worth a shot I think. There is also a lady on here called flowerybeanbag or something who is in HR and is very sharp. If you do a thread in legal/money matters, I am sure she would come up with some useful advice as no doubt she must have come accross this situation before

Josey - bad luck. Agree with needahand - it's their cock-up which your DS pointed out months ago and they should be reasonable.

I have just found out that becuase DH is on probation at work (has recently moved), he's not entitled any paternity leave. He hasn't taken much holiday so far, so he'll have to do that instead, but it's so annoying because he really wants to be around for the first 2 weeks.

Also, having compared my maternity pay compared to others, is so mingy - it's barely going to cover my food bill per week -and I've worked at the firm for approx. 4.5 years.

HI

Great new thread, but there's no way it will last until the babies arrive , we are way too talkative.

PP - great news about the mortgage, I moved house 4 days before ds2 was due. I had help packing from friends and family(sorry Ernest), kept the hospital bag , car seat and moses basket in the car so I knew where they were, sent ds1 off out for the day with neighbours then I supervised. 1st item to be unpacked was a bed for me to lie down on!!

Feel like crap, attempting to make lasagne for tea and batches of bolognaise sauce for the freezer, and I just can't be bothered, must think of Ernest to spur me on.Might have 5 minutes on the settee first though

Josie I think it might be worth speaking to someone like the citizen's advice bureau your DH may have some legal recourse on this. I was overpaid by a previous employer a couple of years ago and at the time someone said that when his wife was in the same situation she was able to refuse to give the money back on the grounds of the financial hardship resulting from it. You never know it could be worth a try.

Thanks for the SPD physio tips, I will call them and arrange an appointment now.

mellymell can't you DP take two weeks parental leave. I think he needs to give 21 days notice and perhaps you need to have been employed for a year, can't remember exactly but it may be worth having a look into it

Josie I agree with alipalli. At the end of the day, it is not like you pocketed the money and kept shtum. You tried to bring it to their attention and they were incompetent enough not to do anything about it for ages so I don't see why you should be the one suffering hardship because of their mistake at the end of the day. They have to be sensible. Possibly I would remind them that stress is very bad for a pregnant woman.

Needahand - thanks for the suggestion - trouble is he will only have been there 9 months and so won't be eligable.

Oh dear - what with moving house, SPD and various DHs job issues, we're going to need this thread just to sort those out, let alone discuss small wriggly things ...and babies .

JOsey- agree with the others- you were up front and company were f*cking useless. Find the HR lady...

Mmm. Carrot cake

PP- fab news, and worry ye not. Our move date was provisionally 6 days before my due date and is now 6 days after!!!

Debs- will join you on the sofa. I have a nice cheesescake going if you fancy a slice!

Totally don't get this Cheggers thing...must have missed that naked whatever.

Jamaican Ginger Cake here, first thing that got unpacked from Tescos this afternoon, got DH malt loaf so he won't eat mine

Josey that's disgraceful. Is it a big company/small company? He needs to speak to his line manager and/or HR department and explain that the repayment proposal will leave him in financial hardship. I would reiterate that he had reported this on several occasions. I would then back it up all in writing either letter/email to both his line manager and HR department. I'd recommend outlining a (realistic) alternative repayment proposal. If they dont comply he should put in a grievance.

Will check up on legality of reclaiming overpaid wages for you and get back to you.

mellymell I'm on SMP too so we can be poverty stricken together .

Josey here for info on deductions from wages. I'd call ACAS for advice (CAB offices are often part-time and harder to speak to the right person).

I can't believe we are moving on to another new thread already, we definitely chat too much!

I would definitely talk to HR about the over-payment and try to get them to take it over a longer period. Point out to them that he is about to have a new baby and needs the time off and maybe they will be a bit more helpful. Does your dh get paternity leave?

What are people's situations with paternity leave? My dh had three days with the last two but has since moved to a US firm who give 10 days!! We were really surprised but very pleased. Mind you, he works really long hours and is always having conference calls at midnight etc. so I think we deserve it!

I'm a bit spoiled - DH gets two weeks on full pay then is taking two weeks annual leave. It'll start basically when I go into labour. [smil].

not [smil]!

[Makecakes whispers- dh is working from home from the week that I am due to be induced, then my mum arrives to stay for a month then after she leaves DH takes a month off. Feeling very lucky.]

Going to 'measure up' at our potential new house tomorrow!!!!

Josie - Dramaqueen can probably help more than me. However I used to be a pensions manager: legally it is deemed fair to try and claim the money back over a period of time that is at least double that over which it was paid. That used to be standard procedure for those for whom giving the money back would cause no probs. If it would then triple or even quadruple the period of time would be reasonable. However I also recall cases where the trustees decided that it wasn't worth the hassle of trying to get the money back at all.

If you would like me to talk to my payroll manager (who sits near me), I'm happy to do so?

Thanks for your messages - it's great to be able to share some happy news! DH has suggested the LO and I decamp to a friends house for the day whilst he and some of his friends move all our stuff - I'm not going to argue.

Sorry to hear about the SPD sufferers - I must remember how lucky I am! My physio is wonderful, even if the effects don't last long enough. It's also free through work, so I'm not missing a single appointment.

The breastfeeding tops comments are very useful. Will check ebay tonight to see if there are any bargains...

New craving .... carrot cake....

I've never used bfeeding tops - just hoiked up what I'm wearing, whilst using the baby to hide my flab and a muslin draped over my shoulder. I did this once at a governors' meeting at the boys' school and was congratulating myself on how discrete I was, when I realised that my top had got tangled up and I'd spent the past hour sitting opposite the headteacher with my horrific post-natal gut flopping out

My DH is self-employed so doesn't get paternity leave. At all my other labours I have phoned him when things got going (I've been happy on my own when induced as it can take ages for anything to happen), and he brings work papers to the delivery room. He generally puts them down when I'm about to push . Hopefully I won't be induced this time so he'll be around for the whole thing.

Having said that, my lovely in-laws are coming for 5 weeks and staying in a flat nearby (their choice!) so I will have lots of help, so feel very lucky.

DH has got an evil strategy for rejecting names. He lost a case today and told me that his gloating opponent's name was the name that I have set my heart on!

rolf that's pretty sneaky of DH. Quite funny though!

I thought it was funny, too! But it means the gloves are off - I'm making up all sorts of stories to promote my favourite names! I'm even rehearsing the old delivery room standby of asking for my favourite name seconds after delivery, when only the hardest-hearted husband would refuse you anything

Thanks for the info re pay....Its not so much we will be left broke its a case of DH has a salary plus 5 off-shore days if he does any work or not and that pays all the bills etc but if there was no work and they took the deduction then we are boxed anything over the 5days we are fine does that make sense....anyway if he takes paternity leave they are mingy and he looses his salary for that time and gets the standard paternity rate so we better off he takes hols.....they sent a letter today to say that he has been over paid he has 7 days to sign and return a slip to say he got the letter and they will show the reductions on his wage slip if he doesnt reply they will take them anyway but not show the deductions he managed to talk to someone when he got to Norway and they have said they will look at spreading it over longer than 6 months as he wont have the same pay each month...aparently he is not the only one they have dont this too and they will be having a meeting when they can get them all together whenever that maybe...even though they are taking the 1st deduction this month grrr ok I have banged on enough sorry guys.

Im going to have to make carrot cake for sure now....mmmm with lots of butter icing.

Effing guests, have been phoning all day we are coming, yes we know. We will be leaving at, thank you, tis now nearly 10 and still no sign of them no phone call nothing.

OK here now, very nice, and now I can go to bed.

Welcome to splodgesmum!

Just to say thanks very much to everyone for all the advice about breast pumps (especially upsidedowncake who very kindly included a link to my local children's centres - coincidentally my antenatal classes are at one of them).

Also coincidentally, a manual breast pump just came up on my local Freecycle and I'm collecting it tomorrow! Everyone's helpful advice made me think it was well worth giving manual a go at least. So am feeling very pleased about the zero expenditure.

Have also got a Baby Bjorn and also a whole bag full of nice, good condition newborn clothes from Freecycle a few weeks ago so would very much recommend it.

Good morning

Things are even worse here today - DH also has Tristan's germs now - why are men so bad when they are ill? It also means I don't get looked after now - he's really good with me when I'm poorly but I don't make a very good nurse, I'm fine if the boys are ill but with dh it's just different. Please send some get better vibes to Austria please!!

Baby must have been trampolining last night - was up every 2 hours to wee last night, oh, or maybe it was because I woke up to cough and you all know what that can do!!

Wigeon - sounds like you're getting some good freecycle bargains, wish they had it here.

PP - great idea to go to a friends whilst your dh moves you.Then you're not there to hear them struggling up the stairs with the beds etc...

Rolf - bfeeding/showing the flab, I have done exactly the same
I'm trying to get dh to face up to looking at boys names so I left him a list at the computer, he laughed a lot at some of them and that's it so far.

Sophie - glad your guests arrived at last, I hate waiting up for guests. We had some that got lost on the way, went to the wrong Muehlbach and we had to keep calling them (on their foreign mobile)to talk them through the journey otherwise they were ready to give up and book in where they'd got to. Wished I'd never bothered , when they left at the end of the week the woman had dyed her hair and bleached all the towels.

Makecakes - how definite is the "potential new house" and when will you be moving?

Ernest - how are things today, boys back at school? Any lemon cake left for us?

Morning all - Deb I 'm with you, love being nursed, bad at doing the nursing. DH is brilliant with me. DD gone to school and breakfast for 9.30 so have a while before I need to do anything.

My mother has very kindly offered to pay for me to see a physio privately if a referral is not forthcoming, may well take her up on that as just getting worse.

Hi everyone, god this is a busy thread - I can't keep up!

Boys' names - we're considering Alexander (dh's favourite), Samuel, Oliver, Evan. But as I say, we're both very traditional on names so don't expect anything hugely exciting from me!

SPD, I've been having physio and osteopathy - but just found out that since my dh moved jobs I'm no longer covered by his private health insurance so no more osteopathy for me! I'm finally relenting and ordering a belt this week though - I was worried about it hurting the baby but have been assured it won't.

My maternity pay is also completely crap and I work for local government! I changed jobs last year and you have to have 63 wks continuous service to qualify - I will have 61!!!! If I'd known I'd have delayed my IVF by a month - ho hum!

Josie, really sorry to hear about your dh salary. HR depts really can be so incompetent!

Right, I better go to work - by the time I get home there will probably be another 100 posts on here!

Splodge - love your choice of names, I love Alexander but one of my friends has just called her son by this and my BIL is also called Alex but my dh thinks he's a bit of plonker so that rules that name out. We've also got Samuel on the list and my ds is called Oliver - so we definitely love that name! In fact my dh keeps joking that we should use it again if we have another boy

We're also going down the traditional names route particularly for boys but my friends keep pinching my favourite names.

I'm really lucky with maternity pay as I get full pay for quite a number of weeks (too embarassed to say how many). Plus my dh gets one week on full pay, one week on SPP and he hopes to take 2 weeks holiday (but I think this is partly because it will be summer and he wants a nice long time off in the sun). Actually he was really good at looking after me last time, I had breakfast in bed every day - usually cooked!!!!! Not sure it is going to be such luxury this time with a 22 month ds running around

Ahem, I'd just like to say that payroll and HR are often seperate departments/staff. And managers are often very crap/incompetent at passing on information to HR departments <dramaqueen, the HR person, scuttles off to find her high horse>.

If our company overpays someone because of a payroll/manager error I always advise the managers that they shouldn't claim it back. [saintly HR emoticon]

Josey - glad to hear that they are reviewing the payment schedule. However, it sounds very ropey to me that they are threatening to take deductions and not show them on a wage slip?!?!?!!? I would definitely recommend phoning ACAS before your DH goes to the meeting for a bit of advice on his own particular situation. Also, make sure he records all the previous conversations about his pay and any future ones. You never know if it might be useful...

Deb - poor you having a house full of man germs.

splodgesmum- that's a shame you cant keep up with the osteopathy. Had it been helpful in managing the SPD. Sometimes if private health cover only available to employees their employers let them pay to upgrade to include spouse/family. If he hasn't already might be worth asking.

Right best get some work done!

Morning all.

My DH gets one week paternity leave on full pay, which he is taking, and can take another on statutary pay but probably won't as he has pretty much all of his annual leave left to take before september which works out as 4 or 5 weeks (works at a uni so gets loads of annual leave plus a week at Christmas / extra days at easter, very cushy!), I'm looking forward to him being around a lot in those first few months.

Slightly embarassing but have anyone elses breasts started to leak a bit? Mine have but only at night (thankfully!).

i'm with dramaqueen <nettiehay also hides behind her HR chair>... payroll and HR are not always the same department (and payroll are useless compared to HR! )

I'm also on SMP - haven't worked for this company long enough to get their maternity pay (6 months full pay!! Yes full pay!!)

All very jealous from here about paternity leave and maternity pay.

...and my skirt won't do up and keeps falling down

...and am feeling really fuzzy brained and have pissed off a client becuase I sent something that was incorrect to him

...and am feeling really tired of being at work, and just want to go home, go to sleep and not want to talk to anyone.



Am feeling grumpy this morning if you hadn't already guessed, and then feel that I'm not really in a posisiton to be becuase I don't have to move house a la *pregnant penguin* and makecakes, and don't have an ill DH to look after like debinaustria or have SPD.

Morning all-

with you on the lack of slee Debs. Made the mistake of waiting up for DH who went out for a boys supper last night. I can't not wait up in truth because the dog goes bonkers the moment he gets back and I have to get up and open the bedroom door, then she goes nuts, and DH turns all the lights on, blah blah. In short I'm better waiting up. Except he didn't get home until after midnight then I was up every hour needing the loo!!!!

On the plus side, I remembered to take a banana to bed so I had something to eat when the hunger pangs woke me at 4.30.

Mellymell, you're just not having a good day are you? How long do you have until you go on maternity leave? I took 7 weeks before the birth of ds and I was so relieved to not have to be at work -but then I worked for lawyers (sorry to anyone who is/married to lawyers!) and they can be really demanding and stroppy!

Dh has taken the car to play golf today which I am really annoyed about. It's not as if I use it that much (and I only passed my test when I was 28 so I am a really anxious driver who only drives around the local area) but it does mean I don't have to do the long walk to nursery and back at lunchtime, or the walk to nursery and school at picking up time which is a pain when I am feeling unwell.

Have just re-read that, and obviously dh is going to play golf, not the car

Right that's breakfast done, lovely guests helped clear table. Just some ironing to do and then can sit down with my book. Ran out of heating oil last night so got some more coming today, and the best news of all, we are getting our coach house looked at next week to do plans to get planning permission.

oops, put my big feet in it there - sorry, shouldn't have insulted HR people! is now the time to confess i used to work in HR?!!

apologies to all HR people on here

and thanks for the tip on upgrading health cover, i will ask dh to ask about this - why should it be only him that gets to swank about in fancy hospitals when he's ill!!!

<disappears to remove her foot from her mouth!>

Morning all

Yep its a morning and im here!!!

We nearly could have had our first aby this week !!!! hehe

On weds i came home for school and BP was through the roof, i wasnt feeling ill but went to maternity hospital and was on monitors for 5 hours BP still wouldnt go now and although LO was fine they were debating whether to keep me in and talking about waht might happen if it didnt go down (ie bring her out early if it was causing her or me distress eeeek) Poor Dp was at home cause i really thought i would be in and out!!!

Turns out it started to go down and at 10.30 they decided to send me home but iwas to see my oncologist the next day. Against DPs orders i went into work the next day looked after 25 3 year oldsgot told off by headmaster!!!! for being in and then went to dr in pm She took one look at my notes, upped my medication and has put me on partial bed rest from today!!

So hence why im here and not with bunch of screaming 3 year olds!!! Still trying to get head round fact that im now off til 1st NOVember!!! And as it hasnt gone how i planned i was going to work til mid may its a bit strange but hey more time to chat on here!!!

Well going to have to get arse in gear and pack hospital bag!!! just in case!!

Skimmed quickly through all your posts too many to answer personally but i hope you all get better soon those that are ill, welcome to newcomers and those of you like me who are now off work heres to long chats on the internet!!!

Hmm, can see why you were sent home - 25 3 yr olds not going to be good for your BP!

Hope you're getting lots of rest and LO can hang on for a little longer!

melly you can still complain! we all have our own perfectly valid set of whinges.

do you think if we named our son Jackson it would be possible to actually have him called that and not Jack? I do know people whose names are usually shortened (Jennifer, Richard, etc.) that only go by their full names. it's not that i dislike Jack but Jackson is the ONLY name dh and i both really like. i like Cooper, Zane, Connor, Griffin. dh likes Darwin, Jared, Winston (ugh), Sebastian. we both are okay with Wyatt but not in love with. why is it SO difficult??

i'm getting very excited about ds' bday party on sunday but nervous about the cake. i decided to make a carrot cake with cream cheese icing as ds' is more of a savoury kind of kid. so i bought some food colouring and am hoping soft cheese icing will work to make mickey mouse!

crossed posts paro - hope you enjoy your time off and don't end up with an early baby!! you'll probably end up nesting like mad since you're home, i sure am!

dylansmum me and my siblings all have names that are easily and usually shortened, but my parents drummed in a real dislike of shortened names, and as a result we are all known by our full names. My mum used to hang up on my brother's mates when they would ask for a 'shortened' version of my brother. There's always a risk that a name will be shortened but that doesn't mean you cant try and stop it. Jackson is a great name btw.

splodgesmum - dont worry, there are a few bloody useless HR people out there. . Give the rest of us a bad name. Sniff.

mellymell sorry you're not feeling to chipper - complain away!

5 weeks to maternity leave but next week is the last week I'll work full-time although NHS ante-natal classes start next week so will only be in the office 4.5 days.

dylansmum, we have friends with a son called thomas who absolutely insist that he's only called thomas and never tom - it seems to have worked

i've also taught children who only went by there long names and never their short names - takes some work and not everyone will adhere to it, but you can do it!

seriously impressed on making your own cake, btw, i can't cook/bake for toffee - will i suddenly turn into a domestic goddess as soon as splodge arrives?! dh is sincerely hoping so!

oops, i meant 'their long names' not 'there long names' - good example to set for a teacher, can't even get my homophones right! !!!

Sybil - thanks for the sympathy - does it increase if I admit that I am also married to a lawyer to add to my woes!! Have another 3 weeks to go before I go on 'holiday' - DH's words! Am crossing off the days.

splodgesmum there are some crap HR people out there... don't worry, us good ones won't take offence!!

paro what are you doing MNetting? you should be resting!! How does it feel to be told off by a head teacher?? I used to dread it (although luckily didn't happen very often - in fact only once, when I was caught kissing a boy in a classroom and even then the head teacher told me I could do better!! )

Right, enough of the self pity and crossness. Thanks for the sympathy.

Dylansmum Like the name Jackson, but does this mean you are now going to have to change your nickname to Dylanandjacksonsmum - might be a bit of a mouthful

I've still got 7 weeks until I go on maternity leave . Someone else please tell me that they have got as long to go.... I must have been mad to suggest working as long.

With all the bank holidays and a few odd days off I am hoping to only have to do one full time week before I finish.

Paro - that we could have had our first baby arrive this week. Current bets are on makecakes or Neenz being the first! Relax and enjoy your time!

nettie - it was very funny actually!! I really felt like i was a kid back at school!!!

and he kind of mumbles so it was more like
uhhmmm Miss Roz (he always addresses us like the kids do!!!) do you uhmmmm really uhmmm think you should be at work today?

mellymell i think i'll be changing my name to mumto2boyswhatwasithinking!!!

just seen splodgesmum that your also a teacher What age do you teach?

Josie, how many wks will you be when you give up work? Hope it flies by - I'm wishing that I was at home now, but only 2 weeks to go now!

Can you tell I'm really bored at work today?! I work in education and it's the holidays so the phones aren't ringing and there's hardly anyone in - hence just sitting here reading MN like a madwoman!

Sybilvime I am very offended. I am a lawyer and I am not stroppy. Actually I am lying today I am very stroppy, my cleaner had been growing more and more unreliable in the past 5 weeks and basically it now seems that we have to be flexible and do things to her convenience not the otherway round. She stays for 4 hours and last week decided to turn up at 14.30 (meaning she was still cleaning the kitchen when I was trying to cook for and feed DD). I made it clear that I wasn't very happy about how the situation progressed and that I hoped it was a one off and she swore that it was and that she wasn't usually so unprofessional etc

Yesterday she turned up at 15.30. Now how on earth am I supposed to cook, feed and give DD a bath if the cleaner is still in the house at 19.30 i.e the time where I am supposed to put DD in bed. So I told her that I wasn't impressed. She said oh ok I'll go and come back tomorrow. When I asked what time she said 9.00 and she turned up at 10.15. Really really pisses me off. Especially since she has a knack of interrupting me every 20 mins when I work, interrupting conference calls etc. The other day I was on the phone with my boss, she came in the room I was in and started cleaning it when she obviously could see I was on the phone. She was making loads of noise so I changed rooms, 30 seconds later she followed me in the other room and started to make noise there too.

Sorry about rant, I know there are more important things in life and that I shouldn't complain especially since I am lucky enough to have a cleaner but argh she annoys me so much

paro how scary. Are you feeling better now? Just knowing I could have my baby by the end of the week would have stressed me out no end and sent my BP shooting up on its own! Are you feeling better now. I hope you enjoy your best rest and don't get too bored once the novely has worn off

mellymell you are still entitled to rant you know

Debs gosh poor you, a house full of sick men, now that is something I would know how to cope with. It is bad enough when DH has a cold (not often thankfully) as he is usually dying then!

needahand funny you should mention it but we've had a cleaner on and off since ds was a baby. every now and then i get so frustrated i switch them or (like last time) fire them and do it myself for a while. but it's tough on me and dh's relationship because he's sooo messy (honestly, the messiest person i've ever met) and he's in complete denial about it so i nag at him to pick up after himself and he gets defensive and it's just a bad scene! i'm much less resentful of him trashing the house when someone else that he's paying for cleans it!

anyway we just started up again because of my SPD i can't do it anymore even with my overwhelming nesting instinct, and the woman is my new hero. i don't think this flat has ever been so clean, and i'm super fussy. i'm almost on a high from it i'm so pleased!! how sad is that?

but i do think that if your cleaner is taking the p* you should think about letting her go. she obviously thinks you won't do anything about it and so isn't too fussed. i know how hard it is to have someone else come into your home though... it's a tough decision.

Sorry Needahand, obviously you are an exception, and not at all like the stroppy little gits who used to jump on me in a panic when I arrived at work in the morning because they had fifteen minutes to get to court and had no idea how to do basic research... Oh, so glad I am a sahm these days.

I would like a cleaner though, but possibly not yours.

hello - just gatecrashing your thread ... anyone seen Neenzandhertwinbeans around recently? Think she is this June thread usually ... we are missing her on the 'twins or more' thread!

<waves bye bye>

Needahand - I think I have been lucky so far with my cleaners - I got to the stage that I refused to give up any more of my weekends cleaning and just went ahead and got one. Even had it written into my wedding vows that I would never have to hoover, but DH has a selective memory on that one.

The current one is wonderful in every way, but spends a lot of time (I suspect) playing with DS. it's rather telling that his second word after 'Daddy', was the cleaner's name - no mention of mummy or the childminder's names!

Dylansmum: same for us, we started having a cleaner when bothDH and I were doing silly hours in the city and then bickering all weekend to know whose turn it was to clean. We soon decided that this one would be best solved by a cleaner.

At the moment I am mosty working from home because of SPD but when I go to work and work 8 to 12 hours + 4 hours commute, the last thing I want to do at the weekend is clean.

I know she has some personnal issues and we have tried to be understanding, but there is a fine line between being understanding and being taken for a ride and I think this is exactly what is happening. The thing that annoys me the most is that we use an agency just to avoid that type of problems. I think I will have to have a word with both the cleaner and them. She also really ennoyed me yesterday when after turning up at 15.30 without letting me know/asking me if it was ok, when she told me she had given my personal details to a prospective employer so that I could give them references. One it would have been niced to be asked if I didn't mind my personal details being given and two, at the moment funny enough I don't feel like giving references. I would feel like I am lying/misleading the other people.

sybil don't think I am usually stoppy (was teasing you, couldn't help it) but I know what you mean. That is one of the reasons I used to hate working in private practice, all these lawyers who think what they are doing is the most important thing in the world and being stroppy/off-ish and having mini fits just wasn't for me. I am obvioulsy not enough of a dramaqueen!

Pazza no we haven't. I was actually wondering about her this morning when makescakes mentioned her. I don't think she has been on here since the beginning of the week

paro, i was a teacher, until last summer - taught Y 5/6 and absolutely loved it! However, it wasn't easy to fit IVF in round a f/t teaching job so I moved into the education dept of our local authority

hope to go back to teaching once the family is complete - who knows when that will be!

Splodge - I was a teacher too, there's a few of us here, I taught from Y4 down to Nursery which is where my comfort level was - I loved Nursery but they were very physically demanding when I was pregnant, can see why Paro has been signed off.

Germs here don't seem to be going yet, we have some friends staying and we're off out with them tonight for a meal - should be fun between the coughing.

Oh, and my Dad gets married today in Las Vegas - yes the Elvis wedding . He's been with his partner for 18 years, says he'd waited long enough to see if My Mum would come back so he may as well get married again!! I'm trying to time the call so I can speak to him beforehand, they're 9 hours behind us, so I think if I call at 5.30 ish he should just be getting up.

Deb- oh my god, did you know that he was getting married.

Josie, we are taking bookings up to 16th June and baby turning up on 19th so yes still have some way to go.

splodge - I'll be 38 weeks when I stop work so I am leaving it as late as possible. It's what I did when I had my ds but it's different this time round as fitting in work and family is harder and I have more aches and pains this time round. I'm hoping that as I get bigger and bigger people will be more sympathetic to me at work...but I may be being overly optimistic . Plus I'm moving departments in 2 weeks time which may be easier because I won't actually have any responsibility for projects but I will be trying to create a good impression. Downside is that my old department are expecting me to do 1 day a week for them but I just know that they will pile more work on me than 1 days worth. Planning to stand my ground on that one and make sure I don't overdo it too much.

Ooh, I'd love a cleaner. However, have been looking at the finances this morning and there's no chance of that. Trying to work out back to work options at the end of maternity leave, and it's scary to think that even cutting down to 4 days a week will have a bit impact (when you add on childcare costs too). Thankfully both DH and I have salary sacrifice childcare schemes at work so that'll save us some pennies. Am dreading having to live on SMP though. We wont go hungry or anything, but I'm really going to hate not having my own spends. DH and I obviously work as team when it comes to finances, but we do keep seperate bank acocunts and have our own seperate 'disposable income'.

Josie I hope things get easier for you. Huge admiration for your plan to work up to 38 weeks!

I'm really looking forward to my first week after I finish work. As we wont be fitting in a summer holiday DH and I have planned loads of nice relaxing days out. Lets hope the weather better by then though!

How exciting a Vegas wedding. I think it is sweet. Not sure about Elvis though but I guess if you do it in Vegas, you might as well go Vegas the whole way. Are you happy for him? Do you like his partner?

Dramaqueen now what you mean about SMP. It is hard not to have your own spend isn't it. It is like you need to justify every penny/purchase you make to yourself. Even if it is like buying a cheap top because nothing fits you anymore.

Josie perhaps you should stop in the middle of you office everynow and again and rub your back while pulling faces and saying "oooh" might work

Josie you could clutch at a nearby desk/chair/colleague as well .

Shame you couldn't make it to Vegas for the wedding deb*.

*needahand - I've squirrelled away some spends for a shopping trip post baby. Nothing from last summer will fit me and I'll need some new stuff.

Actually, I know I'll probably be too busy to think about what I'm wearing, but I do get bored of my casual clothes quite quickly... it's going to be very wierd not just putting a suit on monday to friday and having to find stuff to wear!

Josie, wow, 38 weeks - you're v brave! Although that's probably not what you want to hear right now is it?!

Know what you mean about having your own money - dh and me have joint accounts and nothing separate, but it'll be weird not contributing to that income anymore. I plan to be a SAHM if finances allow so god knows when I'll next earn my own pennies again!

I'm also going to be working up to 38 weeks - but because of some annual leave and bank holidays I will be working 4 day weeks for the last four weeks... hopefully I'll be fine and Bug won't make an early appearance! I've already got the resident 1st aider panicking every time he sees me (he is the campest man in the world, so it is hilarious!) So far I've promised my boss and various others to not give birth on the new carpet in my office!

nettie - LOL at your poor first aider! Last time I was going to work until 39 weeks but my two closest colleagues kept teasing me about my waters breaking in the canteen and the fact that they would have to put up one of those little yellow signs that say 'slippery floor' so I moved it to 38 weeks!

I am quite lucky in the fact that my dh works at the same company (never see him at work as there are 3500+ on site) so at least he can do the driving and will be on alert for me calling him . Having evil thoughts about getting a friend to wind him up but probably shouldn't cry wolf in case it really happens .