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Childbirth
: VBAC or elective section - how did you choose and were you happy with your decision?
(78 messages)
It's so good to read positive stories about elective sections, I know that it isn't everyones ideal delivery but posting positively will I am sure, be of benefit to those who are undergoing the same.
Congratulations on a safe delivery and I wish you well with your babies
I had an elective after much deliberation. My scan indicated a large head like my first baby so went with it. Ended up with a much smaller baby so wonder if I could have pushed him out!
Anyway, no complaints about the section. Very calm throughout and was out of hospital the next day with minimal pain relief. Compared to last time, I was still in agony 2 weeks later. I found this thread when trying to decide and could not believe an elective would be so different!!
Ladies I had ds2 by elective section on 2nd October and it was the best decision I have ever made.
A bit surreal to wake up and go 'lets go have our baby today!'. I was third on the list which meant we didn't get going until just after midday. But iut was all very relaxing - the staff were all very chilled and helped me to feel relax. All the elements of my birth plan that were important to me were done and it was great.
Dh watched the whole thing. I asked for the screen to be lowered when he was born and the also raised my head so I could see it all (couldn't see incision though which I was very happy about!). It was amazing and incredibly moving to watch this after all the panic last time. And he was passed straight out to the midwife and then put straight onto my chest for skin to skin which was just magical. LAst time I hadn't been able to cuddle ds1 - dh held him next to me - so it was great. I have some amazing photos of it all (some on profile if anyone is interested).
Recover was so much better - I had expected this but not the extent of it. I would have gone home the following day (and stopped painkillers on about day 5) but wanted a bit more support with breast feeding as ds2 was having a few probs latching on.
3 days after my section I was out and ab out, 4 days after I was in the park and pizza express with my boys and since then I have been doing pretty much all as normal just being careful with lifting stuff and obviously not driving.
It helps that dh is very supportive and has 2 weeks off now and 2 from 4-6 weeks and my paretns are coming to stay in the interveneing 2 weeks (and I get on with them!!).. And I also had no demons to expel from last time as despite it not being what I would have chosen I felt in control and informed throughout and was happy in the end with everything that happened.
I do think its a very personal thing - what was so so right for me would be someone elses nightmare scenario. So I think you need to think about what is important to you and in the end go with your gut reaction. If anyone wants to ask me anything about it you are very welcome to CAT me and I will anwer anything you are unsure about or send you my birht plan.
Just adding my experience here, I know Alicet ahs already made her decision, but fro anyone else.
I had an emergency c-section with DD at 32 weeks because of placental abruption. With DS I felt I was totally pushed into having an elective section, I actually cried to my consultant and begged to be allowed to have him naturally, unfortunately I didnt realise how much the choice was mine then.
I am now pregnant again, and am determined to go into labour with this baby!
I think on making the decision the whole point is whether or not a vaginal birth feels as important to you as it does me, also recovery time can make a big issue, I will have a 7yo and a 3yo to look after as well as the new baby, so even my midwife suggested a VBAC would be more feasible in my situation.
For any of you having a VBAC, good luck, and for those of you who don't, good luck to you too!
so were you induced because of the size of your little one? sorry for all teh questions, just trying to get an idea..
but at the end of the day, you can surely ask for an elective, and having already had failed induciton and previous surgery, tehn i cannot imgaine you being told no
i was in germany, i had 3 of the gels. they did nothing.
my dd had stopped moving, ( basically i had no more roomd for her) and he hb was all over the place.
So they decided to induce me, had 3 gels over 2 days, and didnt experience even 1 contracition. They said i could have gone onto a drip etc... but they thought it may take a while to get me going. By this point i had been in hospital for 4 days and was a bit fed up so asked for a section.
I have a crap tummy now, with no feeling at all, so a second for another child would not be a problem. tbh i had lost 50% of feeling from when i had my cyst removed, so i didnt find the cs painful at all.
and sorry for the hijack again.
Alicet, its a hard decision, and i guess you just have to chose what you are happiest with.
my dd was elective cs after 3 failed attempts at induction. I have never even had a contraction!
prior to that i had a large ovarian cyst remeoved, which was basically an op like a cs, but with a cyst and no baby!
so ive been cut twice.
Tbh i would like another elective cs, but do you get to chose on the nhs??? and does my history of two cuts and a non responsive induction have any bearings on this?
Would just like to add to the mix that I had a really positive hospital water vbac on Tuesday of this week.
It took a lot of planning and talking to different people at the hospital, but the birth of dd was exactly how I would have wanted ... and the difference in mobility is huge ... I suffered with spd and coccyx pain during this pregnancy too, and the spd has almost totally resolved already - the physio has told me that the hormones involved in a natural labour have kick-started the healing process.
Birth story follows:
Afternoon all ... Apologies in advance for cross-posting this, but dh has Mairwen all cuddled in to him, allowing me 5 minutes to come and tell you all about it!
Well, as you know I had acupuncture on Saturday afternoon (seems like another dimension), then when I came home, the period cramps got stronger, and more unpleasant, and I was running back and for to the loo all the time.
Took some paracetemol then went to bed with the TENS machine on, woke at 10.30ish and had a show - got very excited!! Went back to bed, and woke at 11.20 to a gush of pink liquid - panicked a bit as I thought I was bleeding, so phoned the hospital, and they told me it was probably just more of the show. 11.45, I had another gush, and started getting BIG contractions, so phoned them again, and they told me to go in.
By the time we arrived the contractions were rolling in every 2 minutes or so, and when I was examined I was already 5 cm dliated. I'd asked if the pool was free the minute I walked in through the door, and was told that some interest had been shown in it, but I was quite forceful about wanting it ... and as the cosultant had written about water on my notes, I was taken to the pool room. At the 1st examination, I was told that baby was back-to-back, so getting in the water was just magic!
After a while, the contracctions were really hurting my back, and I got the urge to push. Wonderful midwife told me that this was probably because of position of baby, and that I'd need to breathe through them for the time being. I had the good old gas and air, to take the urge off the need to push.
At about 4am, the midwife suggested that she examine me, although it wasn't really time, as I was having real problems blowing through the urge to push, so I got out of the water, and she examined me, to find that the baby was in fact already on her way down the birth canal!
I got back in the water, and started pushing, midwife was fabulous, quite firm with me, but not at all in my face. Eventually, it got to 5.30am, and as I had had a previous section, and was getting quite tired, she suggested I get out of the water, and we would assess whether I needed to go upstairs to the CLU.
The thought of not getting my natural vbac, and the walk from the pool to the mattress seems to have given me a 2nd wind, as I got down onto all fours and pushed the baby out 10 minutes later.
I tore quite badly (wonderful midwife sewed me up beautifully!), and also needed a managed 3rd stage as I was getting to the edge of the bleeding being classed as a pph, so consented to the injection.
Mairwen fed before we left the delivery room, then we went back to the original room we had come from where we had a wonderfully unhassled period of skin-to-skin, and got to know our new baby.
That was Monday - we came home later on Monday afternoon, and have been getting to know our daughter. I've had some difficulty establishing breastfeeding, but have been superbly supported by the midwives and breastfeeding cousellors at the hospital, and I think we're getting there.
I've laid a lot of demons to rest in the past couple of days!!
I'm so pleased to read everyone's comments --I'm new to the site but have been agonising over VBAC vs EC so much over the past few weeks that I signed onto the forum today specifically to see how other people felt -- and found this threat! Reassured that everyone's agonising the same way, and seeing the different viewpoints have helped categorise my various stresses (though not yet make up my mind!). I'm tending towards the elective c section but wavering daily! I have an appt with a consultant on Monday to ask his advice, but I want to have a fairly clear idea of how I'm feeling before going into the appt, so I can ask all the right questions. Good luck to everyone who still has births/decisions outstanding, and glad you've come to a decision that's right for you, Alicet!
hbm - just to let you know I'll be thinking of you this week... Thought I would post now as I won't get a chance after I go into hospital on tues! Look forward to hearing how you have got on - who knows you might have had your baby by now!
yes feel happy...think the thought of going overdue rahter than giving birth was what was really stressing me, im just so uncomfy with the SPD.
i also feel better about it as i remembered that i was more mobile next day after last section than i had been the day before due to SPD even though the scar was sore. Im managing with ds now so figure it will be pretty much the same.
Mines booked for 2 days after yours...good kluck to you too!!
Good on your hairybabysmum. At least you have been able to make a decision yourself rather than be browbeaten into one by your mw! Good luck and keep us posted!
Less than 2 weeks till mine now - can't believe it!!!
Hello alicet and everyone else. I had my appt witht he hospital yesterday. All good, i have booked in a c/s for 40 weeks as i really dont want to go overdue and if it all kicks off before then will try for the VBAC.
Consultant did feel my tummy and say all good down there you might not make it to 40 weeks, plus ds was a week early so we shall see!!
I had a VBAC for DS2, and felt very strongly about my right to have a good try to achieve one. I planned a HB, but ended up with GBS, so had to be induced (waters broke on Sunday night, no contractions by the Thursday, so was induced Friday morning). Ended up with an large episiotomy / tear, which was initially very painful (comparable to a section), but wasn't as bad for as long. At 6 weeks post-birth, I wondered what on earth I had done, but at 12 weeks I felt completely back to normal, and that I had made exactly the right decision.
I think if you go for a VBAC, and decide that you really want one, as opposed to having a go, and seeing what happens (which is still a valid choice), you should go in very informed with a clear birth plan and clued up birthing partner. The VBAC support groups are all great (if a bit extreme in some cases).
I had an emergency cs with DS - heartbeat dropped and when delivered he had the cord twice round his neck and was very blue. Consultant was happy to agree to elective cs for DD - and it was a lovely experience. DS was just over 2 at the time but I had no problems looking after both of them.
Yes it certainly does! And the fact that I feel pleased means that for me it's the right decision. Thats what it came down to in the end really. Despite all the worries about ds and how he would cope while I wasn't able to do so much with him it still felt like the right decision. He will only be 20 months so won't remember any of it and I have my dh or my mum with me the whole time for at least the first 6 weeks and more if necessary so he won't be neglected!
Its a hard decision I think though - I really felt the responsibility of it being my choice. Had been worried I would blame myself if I had complications and wish I had chosen the other. Which doesn't happen if you just have to get what you're given does it!!! Think I have got over that now though - both options have their pros and cons and having weighed them up this feels right.
I have been lucky though that my mw and consultant have been very supportive no matter what I had chosen. Seems like some people have real difficulty finding that sort of support and are being pushed into something thats not right for them. Which is pretty rubbish.
Good luck to you in getting what you want hon whether thats a section or vbac.
Hi aliecet...good for you. I have got an appt next thurs with my actual consultant (rather than registrar) so that is good. I thin i have decided that i am going to book a c/s for 40 weeks as i cant bear the thought of going overdue (think this is where a lot of my stress is coming from). If i go into labour before then will see what happens/how i feel like you. Will also see how i feel after discussion with consultant
Mind you today have seen a thread about 4th degree tears which makes me want to cross my legs and book a c/s asap!!
OK so I have taken the plunge and booked my section for 2nd Oct when I will be 39 weeks exactly. If I go into labour before then I will take a view when I get into hospital depending on how far on I am and how I feel as to what I will do then.
Feel vrey relieved for having made a decision which tells me this must be the right one for me!
Right, feel better today having slept on it and bent my friends ear last night!!
She hit the nail on the head when she said id gone to m/w wanting to be 'sold' the VBAC as i was wavering and she basically jsut didnt do that.
Im going to ring the hospital today to see if i can get an appt. Am going to ask if i can be booked in for c/s at week 40 and if i go into labour naturally before then, i will give the VBAC a try. Reaslised i cant bear the idea of going overdue as i feel i am struggling a bit physically already due to SPD. Ill also discuss c/s vs instruments witht he hospital. Good tip re consultants secretary too...
Will let you know how i get on but feeling much better today thanks everyone.
Number two was vbac attempt thwarted by the medical profession who kept me strapped to bed on monitor and after about 9 hours of this ended up as emergency section. Blamed myself as I didn't stand up for myself
Number 3 was a very quick VBA2C, 1 hour 25mins all three parts of labour culminating in a ventouse delivery due to placental abruption - was too out of it to notice and the joy of walking out of the hospital 12 hours later was immeasurable .
Number 4 was an even quicker VBA2C culminating in delivery of an almost 11lb baby with the help of just g and a . Walked out of hospital 3 hours later. Lots of s !!
In the cases of numbers 3 and 4 the births were both active with intermittent monitoring, in order to achieve this I did have to change gps and hospitals to find people who supported me. It was definitely worth it .
I am always saddened that people have not been able to experience what I and my dh experienced ie a positive birth. I did have to work hard to achieve it but bloody hell it was worth it.
If you have even a slight hankering for a 'natural' delivery, then please, research it properly, there are loads of people out there who can help/advise. The UKHBACVBAC chat room on yahoo has loads of information there for the asking.
This is obviously just my opinion/experience, but I wish more people could open their eyes to the possibility of a positive birthing experience..
Good luck what ever you choose, but for me it was a chance to have a healthy mother as well as a healthy baby - I had pnd after section number 2.
Oh and the number of people who are amazed that the doctors let me have a VBA2C after having 2 sections and let me go 17 days overdue with number 4 - it is NOT a case of the doctors letting me, it is a case of the mother making up her own mind as to what is best for all concerned and informing the medics of what she intends to do. No one can insist that you must be monitored throughout labour - how I wish I had known that during labour for number 2 .
Sorry bit of a long one here, if you got to the end - congratulations
Hairybabysmum - def call the hospital clinic yourself (or consultants secretary if you have a named consultant) and get a clinic appointment asap to speak to someone who will go through the pros and cons of a section so that you can make an educated and informed decision on what would be right for you rather than being bullied into one by someone who is clearly pro vbac. nothing wrong with being pro vbac but there is a lot wrong when her views mean she has given you none of the facts and an awful lot of guilt tripping.
Nonsense to say you can't put in your birth plan you would have a section over an instrumental delivery. Like I said before there are some circumstances where this won't be possible (if the baby is very low down into your pelvis) but not all.
Thanks to everyone else who have added their experiences to this thread. They are all very helpful for me and I'm sure a lot of other ladies who are posting here....
I went for VBAC after a horrible emergency section first time round. Because the first section was so ghastly, I felt I needed to try for a natural birth (had gone into the first one totally birth-planned up, with intention for water, no drugs, etc etc). I felt lots of pressure to have a VBAC from the Kitzinger-style school of thought - and people (like my helpful NCT teacher) kept suggesting I had been bullied into a section by the medical establishment. Tosh in my circumstances - I was in labour for 72 hours before they started to insist on a section.
BAD decision. I failed to progress again, had another 14 hours of massive contractions with no dilation and had another section. This time the c-section was great - and I'm sure not least because it took place first thing on a Monday morning instead of mid afternoon on a Sunday. Fab surgeon, fab anaesthetist, great midwives after the birth, quick easy recovery with no infections (unlike first time round with two infections and heavy bleeding for 3 months). The second section healed my experience of the first section as well as any VBAC could have done.
My second emergency c-section experience was lucky. I could have made this more likely with an elective. I would recommend anyone to have an elective, especially if first time round it was for reasons to do with the mother and not the baby.
Yeah, but you might get the patronising midwife you saw today wh olet's face it wasn't exactly listening to you.
I get very angry when they start talking about my fears and how I might want to talk to someone to feel better about the crash section. It makes me want to shake them good and hard and say "Listen here,missy. It's not about feeling better about it. It's about ensuring that it doesn't happen again." ARGH!!!
If you really want a section, ask for one in writing. If the midwife refuses to refer you to the consultant, go see your GP and ask him/her to refer you.
Carry the Nice guidelines in and let them know you've done your homework. If they start asking you to justify why you want a section turn it around and give them the opportunity to talk you out of it. Changes are they won't come up with anything you don't already know.
THabks elusis...your points seem to sum up how im feeling also. I made point no. 4 to the midwife today...basically saying ive already had the emergency c/s and associated scar (and matching overhang!) and that i feel that therefore having to deal with the potential of an episiostomey (or worse according to lots of threads on here!) gives me a double whammy. She just looked at me as though i was mad and then talked about my deep seated fear of instrument birth! Not helpful really...surely everyone has an anxiety related to instrument birth, i mean it cant exactly be on anyones birthplan!
On the plus VBAC side i seem to remeber being told i would have one to one midwife due to VBAC and continual monitoring?
I had an elective after an emergency section. My resons were:
2. A big distrust that NHS will be prepared to make the right decisions at the right time if it all goes pear shaped again. If the baby goes into distress, will the midwife notice? Will I be forgotten in the shift change? Will there be an anaesthetist available? Will the cord be wrapped around the baby's neck and no one notice until the baby goes into foetal distress?
3. If I have a section I am guaranteed the undivided attention of a surgeon, an anaesthetist, a midwife and a couple more people whose job titles I don't know.
4. I already have the side effects that come with sections(i.e. itchy scar). So whay add those that come with vaginal birth as well (i.e. things that tear and break).
5. I know what a section is like. I know what to expect in terms of recovery. And I know when the baby will be born and can therefore maximise my whopping 6 weeks of maternity leave.
6. And last but not least... having an elective section is the only guaranteed way to avoid an emergency/crash section.
Oh, and one more thing, they tidied up my scar nicely. It wasn't so great after the crash section. Much better now.
I also recovered from the second section much faster. I needed someone to pick up DD for about the first two weeks, not 6.
well, i feel a bit let down by my discussion witht the m/w. She bawsically said i should have a VBAC as is better for me and the baby but didnt go into anymore depth than that. I asked her about having a c/s instead of instruments if it came to that.
She told me that that wasnt possible and what i should do is go away and write a birth plan as i have a "deep seated fear" of instrument delivery . I did question the point of making a birth plan when i knew i would have little choice (ie no water option, CFM etc). Basically i came away feeling like i was going to burst into tears when i had been looking for some reassurancce from her.
Has occurred to me that maybe me not feeling reassured reflects the fact that maybe my gut feeling is to go for c/s and she just didnt tell me what i wanted to hear??? Im still no nearer feeling resolved about this.
The hospital clinic have booked me in for an appt at 41 weeks to sort a c/s if i go overdue, i asked the m/w if i could bring this forward to 40 wks as i didnt want to gooverdue as i am struggling at teh mo at only 36 weeks. She said she couldnt as the clinic was so busy?? I might ring the hospital clinic and see if i can book an appt to speak to someone there myself....or a c/sec
M/wife did give me the tel no. for the womens physio to talk about the SPD and birth side of things as that is worrying me lots at the mo.
Anyway glad you've made a decision Alicet....im defo erring on the side of c/s after today but will sleep on it i think.
Good points re bed/highchair...i have a trip trap chair for my ds (21 months) and took the bar off it a few weeks ago so he climbs up and down himself, plus he went into a bed 2 weeks ago so dont have to lift over the cot sides and those two things have really helped with how much lifting i have do already.
Canmummy how did you find the recovery 2nd time, with toddler compared to 1st??
I had an elective section with dd1 because she was breech. 2nd time around (dd1 was 22 months by then) I opted for a vbac as I had never been through labour and felt I'd missed out on something vital .
Anyway, it didn't work out and I ended up having an emergency section anyhow. I don't regret this decision as I felt like I had to try for a natural birth. Recovery was a lot quicker 2nd time round and somehow dd1 seemed to understand I couldn't pick her up. Dh had 4 weeks off work and we did things like move dd1 into a bed instead of me having to lift her out of a cot and got her a low chair to sit on so I didn't have to lift her in and out of a highchair.
I had dd3 earlier this year and because I'd had 2 previous sections I wasn't given the option of vbac so another elective section. It was much better being planned as I knew what date she was going to be born and again my dh could get the time off work to look after me and my older 2. Because they were older (6 and 4) they helped me out a lot and they can always climb onto your lap for the all important cuddles.
Thanks MrsBoo - now I have decided to go for a section great to hear such a positive experience!!
Lemonaid - good luck in making your decision too. Its relaly hard I found - I just felt a greater sense of responsibility for making the 'wrong' choice - the first time you just get what you are given and cope with it don't you? But what I ahve come round to realising is that there isn't a wrong choice - go with your gut reaction.
I'm dithering too (but only 10 weeks, so I have plenty more dithering time ahead of me). I think I'm going to talk to some independent midwives about VBAC and my chances before I make a definite decision. And then, of course, I'll change that definite decision several times before the birth...
Alicet, sorry didn't reply to your question. With the first one (emer) I had really quick recovery and totally didn't enter my head not to lift anything. DS was over 9lb. He was just turned 4 when I had the planned CS.
Again, I checked with my Consultant and HV, lifting, feeding, carrying the carseat etc - just like normal. It's different for everyone I suppose, but I have had worse experiences and recovey from a trip to the dentist.
The elective CS was the best decision I have made, it was totally a brilliant occasion. I couldn't have asked for more, and it was so different from the late-at-night emergency experience.
hairybabysmum - yep I'm not keen on an instrumental delivery either. I have put in my birth plan that I would choose a section in preference to that. However I think there can be some circumstances where the baby is so low down that it would very very difficult to deliver them by section and then I'm not sure you get the choice. If they were still pretty high up then you can say that but it isn't always clearcut as far as I understand it....
I have my consultant appt tomorrow to decide and unless anything major changes before then I have decided I am going to go for elective section and if I go into labour before then I will take a view when I get into hospital depending on how I feel and what stage I am at.
Hello Alicet (and nelliel)...are you me??...so far in reading this thread i feel exactly like you. Initially was just going to go for elec c/s, good recovery last time, dont feel robbed of birth, currently obsessed to OCD levels with this decision. But am currently down for a VBAC mainly due to liking the idea of having an even better recovery and the benefit of this to my DS.
Its the idea of an instrument VBAC that concerns me most...im seeing midwife at lunchtime so im going to discuss this with her...i.e can i have the option of labour but c/s instead of instruments if owt went wrong. I know it sounds v. shallow but i feel like ive already got the c/s scar so why add an episiostomy (or worse) to the collection!!
As ive said on te other VBAC thread ive also got SPD and concerns relating to that.
Anyway i guess this is the thread for the 'undecided' so i will post on here afterwards.
Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences with me. Its been really helpful.
I haven't been ignoring you all - just decided that I needed a bit of time away from thinking about it to get a bit of perspective as I think one of the problems I was having was thinking about it too much!
I think I have decided that I will go for the elective section that I had decided on after all - we have very good support in place so that the not lifting ds will hopefully not be a huge problem. If I go into labur before the section date I may give it a go for a vbac depending on how things are when I get in....Being a mess of sleep deprived hormones though I reserve the right to change my mind!!!!
I had Emergency section first time which was fine. Thought long and hard about 2nd and weighed up things like would there be enough staff on the ward to see to me if I went VBAC and ruptured my scar? Only way to gurantee having enough medics with you at birth is to have a c-section.
My elective section in May was perfect. I came home the next day, was able to lift DD1 (16 months) after 2 weeks and I cannot say that from arriving at hospital before the op until now I have ever been in actual pain from the section, slightly sore the first week but that was it.
alicet, you could be me! I;m 29 weeks and had very positive elective c-section with DS as he was breech. Great fast recovery, no probs etc. DS will be 2yr 2mths when current baby is due in November and I have been swinging one way and the other for the entire pregnancy for exactly the same reasons as you - wanting to be able to pick up and cuddle/care for DS1. I have even seen a doula with the view to going for a VBAC (the doula had a VBAC herself) and that was over a week ago. I need to decide if I def want a VBAC before I pay her a non-refudable deposit to book her for the birth. It is SO hard making a decision, esp as the section first time round was so easy and have never had to go through any sort of labour. I feel for you, I really do. One min I think 'hey, women have been doing this for years and so I should be able to do it to', then I think about long diff labours, intervention, tearing etc!!! Good grief it's hard!!! Have you come to a decision yet?
i had an elective second time and it was a huge relief
it took away my fear of having another long and painful failed natural delivery
i just looked forward to the big day and i recovered really well - a very very positive experience
my thoughts were that if i went for a vbac it was not going to be a lovely water birth - it was going to be hard ( baby was breech for later stages of preg and measured large - she was 10.7lb in the end) and I just thought - who am I trying to please here? I just wanted my baby - not a medal.
I did do a wonderful course with the nct though which helped me go through my first delivery and learn more about what had happened and why and that gave me the confidence to make my decision - i would recommend it
Alicet - my ds was 22 months when I had dd, so very similar to your situation. My dh took 2 weeks paternity leave, then my mother came to stay for a week, so for the first 3 weeks I had someone else there to lift ds. It helped that it was an elective section, so they could book the dates in advance and I knew for sure I would have help then.
Also, before dd was born, I went through my daily routine with ds and planned for every time I normally lifted him up, then I thought of a different way of doing it. For example, I used to lift him into a highchair for meals, but I bought a little wooden chair he could sit in which didn't need any lifting by me. Also I used to lift him onto a changing tray to change his nappies, so I just put a changing tray on the floor for that. I got the type of step used for potty training so he could get into the bath easily.
I had a v. bad experience first time (crash ceasarian, baby compressing cord so not getting oxygen). Just didn't want to go through the same horrific panic again, elected for an elective with my second and never regretted it for a minute.
Now my DCs are older, 6 and nearly 4, I'm losing that sense of "but I didn't actually give birth to them". Am just grateful that I was conscious throughout my second child's delivery: compared to being unconscious, it was lovely.
Alicet, Im sure you know by now my feelings. I had Emergency C section with DD and have been hoping for elective this time round, but has been told by my consultant no
I have settled on the idea of trying for a VBAC and hoping all goes well. If I end up with EC again theres a chance of having to have a GA due to drugs im on and them not being out of my system in time.
I truely believe that the main reason for me wanting a C section was fear of the unknown. I knew what i was like after my section, i knew what was going to happen, having never had natural (i only got to 4cm) i have no idea.
Im now settled with the idea of VBAC and hoping to be home as quick as possible for my DD who is 4.
alicet I have never realy thought about it tbh. I think I would still have chosen the VBAC as we probably wouldn't be having any more anyway. But now you have got me thinking and the main reason is the risk to me. However, it is the right thing to not have any more. 3 is a lot and it is hard at times. Have had 3 lots of PND and one lot of AND so it has probably worked out the way it was meant too.
Tutti, your post has been really helpful to me - thank you. Alice, friends of mine who have DC's (2yrs) and had electives recently said that they were picking them up, albeit very carefully and with someone else there, within a week. I think if you've got help at home, they'll be able to pass your DS to you won't they?? My worry is how to get my DS in and out of his cot and bath as he point blankly refuses to do it on his own!
MrsBoo and TuttiFrutti - how old were your dc's when you had the elective sections second time around? And how did you get round the whole not being able to lift them thing?
Ds1 will be 20 months and I'm concerned that not being able to lift him for 6 weeks will be a major problem even though I will have a lot of help
I had a horrific labour with ds ending in emergency c-section. I chose to have an elective c-s for dd's birth 7 months ago.
Reason 1: I found labour extremely traumatic, painful and frightening. By contrast, the c-section was painless and I found the recovery much better than I'd expected.
Reason 2: big babies run in my family, and so do big heads. Ds was 9lb 8oz with a 38cm head circumference. A midwife told me I'd have had a 4th degree tear if I'd given birth naturally. Didn't fancy that much!
Reason 3: I have a medical condition (fibroids) which prevented me giving birth naturally to ds, and might have done the same with dd, but no doctor would give me a definite opinion on this. So if I tried for a VBAC, there was a good chance I'd have another emergency c-section at the last minute.
Reason 4: better the devil you know. I knew I could deal with a c-section, and I'd been told an elective is easier than an emergency (it is).
I'm very pleased I made the decision I did. The elective cs was a great experience, totally different from my scary crash section 2 years before. I recovered feeling in my legs 2 hours later and was walking the next morning, driving after 3 weeks, back at the gym after 8 weeks.
HI, My first ended being emergency, fairly similar situation to Artic. 4 years later, i moved hospitals, and chose CS again. The best decision I ever made - even better that the first time, when i was so drugged up, and exhausted I can't remember it all. The elective was fab, same easy recovery, back to work one week later.
Go with what your head tells you - I am sure you will be able to change your mind if nec.
SO NAB3 do you regret having him vaginally as a result of that experience and their recommendations or would you do the same again? SOunds like your first vbac was great and confirmed for you that it was what you wanted but the second wasn't so great?
Hi nellie! You sound like all the emotions you are going through are almost the same as mine! As well as wanting to avoid another emergency section I also wouldn't be keen on forceps or ventouse but I have been told I have a 60% chance of no intervention needed (with 20% for emcs and 20% interventional vaginal delivery). So I guess the odds are that I will get a straightforward vaginal birth if I go for that but you never know...
I think I also worry that my odds for succesful vbac are lower than that as at the first chance of any problems I think I would panic and ask for a section. And if I think I ahve that as a 'get out' I'm probably not emotionally in the best place for a successful vbac.
Hi Alice! I shouldn't really post cause whilst I've made my decision, it hasn't happened yet, as you know! But like you I have gone back and forth over this since I got pg so know how hard it is and how daunting it is to stick to one decision at this point in the game.
I had an emcs with DS1 2 yrs ago - I was fully dilated, but he got extremely distressed, hearbeat crashed and my blood pressure fell very low. His head shape was also an issue and as the consultant told my DH at the time, 'would not have come out at all easily'. I had no issues around having the emcs, primarily as I had got so far and the reasons for a speedy intervention were medically necessary. Recovery was fine (although the post natal care in the hospital was dire but that's another thread!)
This time round, it was suggested that I consider an elcs and that is what I am going for. The mw's I have spoken to have said that whilst they would absolutely support a trial labour, it wouldn't be in any way open ended (ie, there would be a time limit put on it) - and most have said it would end in some intervention, be that section or forceps/ventouse. The good thing for me is that everyone at this hosptial (not the same as the original one) is determined that I don't have a repeat experience which is really reassuring.
I feel strongly that I dont want forceps or ventouse - I know lots of women have no problems at all with this method of delivery; I just don't want that for me or my baby. And if it got to the point of cs, I know that I would far rather plan it calmly and get the birth I want (as far as poss) as opposed to the ER re-enaction I got first time round!
Saying all of that, my SIL had a baby last week and had a sucessful vbac which totally threw the cat amongst the pigeons - but on reflection we think that we made this decision with all the facts and think it is the right one for us - only time will tell.
I too share your concerns about the recovery and coping with a toddler, esp as I have no family around. But I think a calmer birth with a recovery I have already experienced (alo that isn't to say this one will be similar...) is a good starting point - at least I'll know I'll be out of action and people will help, as opposed to other friends who had natual deliveries, experienced physical and emotional trauma but because it was natural everyone thought they should be fine...
The other intersting fact is that every medic I know who has had a baby has had an elcs.... they obviously know something we don't!!
I'll stop there - I just wanted to say I totally empathise because this occupies most of my brain power and rationale at the moment too. Hope I haven't confused you further!!
Have just joined in on the vbac support thread so maybe thats what my gut reaction is telling me anyway. I think I probably need to stop thinking about it too much and chill for a couple of days then see if I still feel the same
I was bullied in to an elective section by a consultant I had never met before. It was booked for 5 days over my EDD. I saw my usual consultant (who had resured my emergency section scar) and he said not to have a section if I didn't want one. I cancellled the appointment and she was born naturally the day after the previously booked section. I did have to have monitoring while I was pushing, and had a retained placenta, but it was fantastic! With the next one it was a given I would have a VBAC but it is only thanks to my being able to push quick that it didn't end up with a ruptured scar and crash section.
Oh Alicet! I can assure you that it is entirely normal to swither one way or t'other, to have wobbles and fears, to doubt yourself.... It's part of being a VBACer! [imho!]
You are entitled to change your mind as often as you wish right up until the time of birth.
I'd say go for VBAC but it's your decision in the end! No-one elses.
ALso one of the problems is that people I know who have had sections (including me) have had very straightforward recoveries. Compared to a lot of my friends who have had pretty horrendous vaginal deliveries. I know that that doesn't mean it will happen to me but I think it's natural to be swayed by personal experience.
Plus I have never been someone who feels that I have missed out or failed by not having ds1 vaginally - I just feel that for me the birth is a small part of a much bigger experience and all I want is what is safest for me and the baby and also best for ds1. And I think more and more what is best for ds1 is the most important factor for me.
My gut instinct has changed. Before it was that I thought if I ended up with another emergency section I would beat myself up for not going for the easier option of an elective section.
Now I think I've realised its more important to me that I give myself the chance of making it easier for my little boy. If I end up with another emergency then so be it but I think at least I will have tried. So now my gut reaction is more for a VBAC.
Just worrying though that I'm just being hormonal and irrational now as I spent hours and hours looking into the pros and cons of each option almost to an OCD level. So I guess I'm anxious about going for an option that goes against what I have decided after months of rational thought.
I come very much from a VBACtivist stand point in that I had a VBAC, with spinal and forceps in the end and have had to deal with emotional trauma of STILL feeling cheated because I didn't feel dd's birth, was still cut again and still had recovery time from episiotemy. Do I wish I had an elCS instead?
NO WAY, not on your nelly, NEVER!
I still had the elation of having a VBAC, and now the knowledge that my body would be able to do it if I keep away from the intervention.
Next time it will be a HBAC.
So you see, it was important to me to VBAC. How important is it to you? What does your gut instinct tell you? There you will find your answer.
With first labour I was induced after two weeks past due date.
Had really long labour and traumatic forced breaking of waters.
Eventually after failure to dilate further has emergency cs.
I was so shattered and tramatised following lenghthy labour plus cs decided didn't want to go through it again.
Elective cs was so much better and felt a lot better.
Did need a lot of help during first few weeks.
Good luck with your decision.
I had an emergency c-section when I was 9cm dilated with ds1 after he became distressed. Made a good recovery and have only positive memories of my experience even though it wasn’t the water birth using gas and air I had planned. When it came to deciding how to deliver ds2 due in 5 weeks I have agonised over the pros and cons and had come down to deciding to have an elective section. Mainly when it boiled down to it this was what my gut reaction said and I think this is as good a reason as any. My main concern was that I wouldstruggle to look after ds1 but we had found ways round that by ensuring that either dh or my mum would be with me for the first 6-8 weeks and that they would be able to lift him onto my lap etc so he didn’t have to miss out on mummy time.
Well yesterday I went to a physio appointment as I have been having back pain and sciatica type symptoms and to cut a long story short I shouldn’t be lifting ds1 at the moment anyway – should be trying to find ways round this. This made perfect sense but I was surprised at how much the thought of this upset me. I know regardless of how I give birth ds1 will have to get used to doing more himself once I have 2 to look after but it got me thinking that if being able to look after ds2 myself is so important to me maybe I have been silly to decide on an elective section.
So really what I would appreciate is to hear from people who had to make the same decision as me – vbac or elective section – how they came to the decision they did and do they regret / feel pleased with their final decision. With the greatest respect I don’t need opinions as to what I should or shouldn’t do from all the very well informed people on here. This is about trying to get a feel for other people’s experiences in order to make up my own mind.
Thanks very much for reading through my long post and I look forward to hearing your experiences…
. Blamed myself as I didn't stand up for myself
.
. I did question the point of making a birth plan when i knew i would have little choice (ie no water option, CFM etc). Basically i came away feeling like i was going to burst into tears when i had been looking for some reassurancce from her.
